Chapter 30 #2
King Konram is aware of the rumors and how they’ll have gained momentum after the cracking of the palace bell. This is damage control. He wants to show the nobles that he’s still watching over them, still concerned about their fate.
It’s generous of him to take this time to soothe their worries, I guess, even if it doesn’t actually solve the problem. But I’d rather he was generous enough to skip right over me.
No such luck.
When the procession reaches me, my breath catches in my throat. The king offers me his smile with a slight crinkle at the corners of his eyes that suggests it might even be genuine.
“Even in trying times, we stand together,” he says, so close I can count the faint wrinkles on his face that none of the paintings show, and gives my shoulder a light pat.
It’s barely a brush of his fingers. Definitely no kind of attack.
But as I bob my head with a dip of a curtsy, my power shudders inside me.
Push him away. Fling myself out of here. Put whatever I can between myself and the man who’s ordered the execution of every person like me.
My magic doesn’t understand why I won’t do any of that.
King Konram turns with his guards back toward the entrance to the dining hall, and a tremor runs through my body. My bottled power churns and thrashes.
A matching panic shoots through my veins. It’s only a matter of seconds before the backlash begins.
Everyone else is still holding themselves motionless on the announcer’s command. Sweat trickles down my back, and the first punishing claws dig deep into my lungs.
I stifle a gasp.
The procession marches out of view into the dining hall. The students near the doorway stir and start to walk away—and I spin toward the nearest stairwell.
I have to get away. Away from anyone who’ll see my agony and wonder why it struck now.
I just need a few minutes alone…
With each hasty step across the stone floor, the magic’s frustration twists tighter inside me. By the time I reach the doorway, my gut is throbbing and my teeth have clenched from holding back the pain.
As I dash up the stairs, piercing jolts radiate through my limbs. Shit and smitings, why must Stavros’s quarters be on the fourth wretched floor?
On the third landing, I stumble, and a choked sound escapes me. Footsteps thud against the stairs below me.
Through a haze of pain-jumbled thoughts, I hurl myself onward.
Keep my feet moving. Keep my mind on the door I have to reach. That’s all that matters.
I burst out into the blessedly empty hallway of the staff wing and stagger to the door to Stavros’s rooms.
A bump of my bracelet and a quick press of my fingers sends the door swinging open. I shove myself through just as my legs crumple under me.
I slump so fast my forehead smacks the edge of the rug. If my riven magic has claws, they’re scalding now, stabbing through my nerves across every inch of my body.
I wrap one arm around my belly instinctively. When I sputter a cough, the metallic tang of blood saturates my mouth.
If that stupid pipe fleece amplified my magic’s attacks, throwing it away hasn’t helped anything. How much worse can the backlash get?
I’m not sure I want to know.
Ivy! Julita is calling. I can’t tell how long she’s been shouting at me while I tuned everything around me out. What’s happening? This is even worse than before. I don’t know how long it’ll be until Stavros gets back.
That’s fine. I’ll ride the fit out and be back to normal before he returns, and everything will be okay.
I can’t find my voice to say that to her, though.
Urgent knuckles rap against the door.
Alek’s worried voice filters through. “Ivy? Are you all right?”
Gods smite me, he must have noticed me take off and wondered why. It was obvious that I’d originally been heading for the dining hall.
I grit my teeth, fighting through the anguish to speak. But when my lips part, all that comes out is a groan that’ll only make him more concerned.
Benedikt’s voice joins Alek’s. “Come on, Knives. Let us know what’s going on. We can bring lunch up to you if you’re simply overwhelmed by royal admiration.”
I can’t even summon a hitch of a laugh.
They mutter to each other beyond the door, too low for me to make out the words.
My lack of answer isn’t helping anything, but they can’t get in regardless. They have to leave eventually, right?
Or I’ll recover and open the door as if nothing was ever bothering me.
A renewed burst of pain radiates through my body, and I can’t hold back a gasp. My thoughts spin out of coherence.
Ivy, you need help. Can you get to the door to let them in?
No. No. I shiver and squirm in the opposite direction, only making it a few inches before another surge of agony wracks my body.
Julita’s voice turns more frantic than I’ve ever heard her. This is— I can’t leave you like this. Please. I have to—
My mind whirls with a rush of dizziness. I hiss through my teeth, and the unnerving disorientation sweeps through me alongside the pain.
My limbs jerk. And suddenly, without any conscious intent, they shift to haul me around.
What—?
I grope for control, but I can’t stop my shaking arms from pushing me onto my hands and knees.
The sear of the magic’s attack rages through my body, and I almost don’t feel myself lurching up toward the door knob. Grasping it and turning—
No!
I wrench myself backward, breaking the spell, but it’s too late. Benedikt rams the door wider open, and the two men hurtle inside.
“Shit.” The bastard’s bastard drops to the floor by my face and touches the side of my head. “We were right there. How could someone have gotten at you again?”
“I didn’t see anyone in view who looked like they were focused on Ivy,” Alek says. A quaver runs through his voice as he grasps my hand. “But maybe they used the distraction of the king’s visit.”
“Or maybe it’s something else.”
I try to speak, to say something remotely reassuring, but another cough heaves from my lungs. My throat burns, and something wet dribbles over my lips onto my forearm.
“That’s blood,” Benedikt says, his voice turning shockingly urgent.
Alek squeezes my hand and starts to release it as he moves to stand. “I don’t care what she said before. She needs a—”
“No!” I manage to spit out, clutching at his hand to hold him with me. The next wave of pain that lances through me doesn’t hurt quite as much as the ones before.
There. It’s starting to ebb. I’ve made it through.
Just a little too late to escape the consequences.
Benedikt brushes his fingers over my hair. “Her breath is evening out. She can tell us what happened. Right, Knives?”
I inhale and exhale, gathering myself as hastily as I can amid the continuing ache. The men wait, crouched on either side of me like sentinels.
As soon as I think I can do it without falling over again, I push myself into a sitting position. Alek moves his hand to my shoulder in case he needs to steady me.
“Hey,” he says gently. So much worry shines in his bright eyes that I have to fight the urge to lean into his support, as frustrated as I am that he’s witnessed this fit at all.
This isn’t time for weakness. I’m inches away from being discovered.
One small misstep, and that worry will transform into revulsion.
“I’m sorry I troubled you,” I say, my voice only a little rough. “Apparently there are some lingering effects from whatever happened last time—but it wasn’t as bad as before.”
Alek peers at me doubtfully. “It looked worse.”
It was definitely worse, Ivy, Julita breaks in with her internal perspective. You have to tell them the truth.
That’s the last thing I can do.
I manage a crooked smile. “I got a good workout with Stavros’s students this morning. It must just be that I was more tired in general.”
Benedikt slips his fingers under my chin to tilt my face toward him. “As much as I admire a woman who can fend for herself, whatever magic’s been cast on you, it’s doing real harm. Alek’s right. You need a medic to look you over.”
I shake my head emphatically. “No. I told you, that’ll only make me more of a target.”
“Not if we can stop the perpetrator.”
“We don’t even know who that was. I swear, I’ve been through worse before I came here.”
“Ivy.” Alek’s forehead has furrowed when I look at him. “Is it— With Julita in—”
Before he can finish the sentence, anger flares nearly as scorching as the previous pain. “She’s fine too,” I interrupt sharply.
Why wouldn’t he be thinking about her even now? He wouldn’t want the handy body that’s ended up hosting her to conk out.
I rein in my temper. “Look, I just need some time to rest and think through what could have led to this. We have a meeting later this afternoon. We can all hash it out then.”
Alek opens his mouth, closes it, and hesitates before finally speaking. “I don’t want to leave you alone after you just went through… whatever that was.”
And you shouldn’t be alone, Julita pipes up.
I ignore her. “I won’t be alone for long. Stavros was going over some extra material with a few students, and then he’ll come back. You two shouldn’t be seen hanging around me or his quarters anyway, right?”
Benedikt sucks a breath through his teeth, his expression conflicted.
I give him a shove toward the door. “See, I’m perfectly capable of looking after myself again. I’ve got all my knives too. I’ll survive the next ten minutes. Don’t you dare jeopardize our entire investigation over this.”
The vehemence in my voice seems to persuade them, albeit reluctantly. Alek exchanges a glance with Benedikt. “Can you come up with an excuse to stop by Stavros’s classroom, give him a sign that he needs to wrap things up fast?”
Benedikt nods. “If I can’t find him, I’ll come back myself.” He wags a finger at me. “Don’t go any farther than that sofa.”
The moment they’ve stepped out the door, I sag against said sofa, my head tipping back on the cushion.
Why are you pushing them away so hard? Julita demands. You need their help. Something’s wrong, and—
Her insistent voice snaps me back to the moment when my body moved of its own accord.
Or not its accord. Because right beforehand, I got dizzy like I did after Julita first moved into my head.
I cut her off, my hands clenching at my sides. “You took over. You made me open the door. You promised you wouldn’t try again.”
She hesitates in momentary silence. I—I didn’t know it would even work. I thought you were dying—I had to do something. I wouldn’t have attempted it otherwise.
She was afraid I’d die and leave her without a host too. So much concern for me that’s not really for me at all.
I lower my head into my hands, but I’m too tangled up inside to sit there with my feelings.
The cracks in my story are starting to show. I have no idea how I’m going to handle this situation now.
The thought of facing the interrogation Stavros will give me when he marches into his quarters makes me want to vomit.
Grasping the sofa cushion, I heave myself to my feet.
Julita’s presence shifts in the back of my head. Where are you going? They said—
I walk carefully to the door. “I know what they said. And I know what I need. Just a little quiet, so I can actually think.”
Girding myself against the pangs still echoing through my battered body, I stride out into the hall.