Chapter Thirty-Two #2
“Color guard?” Sire’s voice is stern. “I know you’re coming off a successful weekend, but no one in this room is perfect. I expect you to pay attention to the film with the rest of the band.”
We all sit up and train our eyes on the screen.
Five minutes later, Callie whispers, “Pizza after rehearsal? All together?”
I frown. We haven’t all gotten together since our section dinner back in August. There’s no way everyone has the time or motivation for that. But, to my shock, each of the members nods in agreement. The tightness in my chest loosens a bit.
I’m the last to arrive at the restaurant because Mom texts to ask if I’ll drop Kelsey off at dance since she’s overbooked. When I arrive, a chorus of laughter and voices catches my attention. I follow the sound to the back corner where the entire guard is gathered around a big round table.
“There she is!” Li calls.
I wave and sit down. “Thanks for doing this. It means a lot.”
“We needed to have a celebration dinner!” Callie says. “And also to vent about the percussion section proving once again that they’re the worst!”
The others nod vehemently, but I can’t drum up much anger for the other percussion players. I can’t even find the energy to be mad at Brody. All I feel is apathy and an aching sadness.
When I’m quiet, an awkward silence falls over the table.
“Sorry to bum everyone out,” I mumble. “I’m not really in a self-righteous, enraged mood right now. I’m just blah.”
“So…um, you and Max?” Deja says. “That seems so out of the blue. I thought you hated him?”
“I thought I did too,” I reply with a little laugh.
“At least at one point. But we go back a long time, and eventually I realized that all that hate was maybe turning into…” A particular four-letter word floats into my mind, but I quickly push it away.
I can’t say that out loud now. “Into something else. But it’s too hard. I don’t know how to trust him.”
“You shouldn’t trust him,” Addison says. “He’s percussion.”
There are a few snickers around the table.
“Don’t kill me, any of you,” Li interjects, “but I think Max is a pretty good guy. We’ve been playing D&D together and he’s been cool to me.”
“I was the one secretly dating him, so it’s not like I can judge you for liking him,” I reply.
“So…like, is it over over?” Keira asks. “Or is there a chance you’d get back together with him?”
I meticulously fold the paper covering from my straw rather than look her in the eye.
My mind says that we’ll never get back together.
He’s burned bridges that he can’t rebuild.
But my heart…I miss Max so much. It’s hard to do anything but think of him.
I don’t want him to be a stranger again, or my enemy, or my ex.
“I’m not sure,” I say slowly. “I don’t know how we can get back to where we were after everything that’s happened.”
They exchange glances.
“But you miss him?” Devin asks.
I nod because I don’t trust myself to speak.
“Well then, maybe—”
“You’ve got to be kidding me,” Madisyn interrupts. “Did they follow us or something?”
I turn around to find Felix and Niko walking in the door, deep in conversation. My first thought is that I’m glad Felix is making more band friends. And my second thought is that this dinner just got really awkward.
“Do you want to go somewhere else so we won’t be overheard?” Addison whispers.
“No, it’s okay,” I say. “I’m actually friends with Felix. We play D&D with him too.”
“Traitors,” Callie mutters, but she only looks a little bit mad.
Felix freezes when he sees all of us staring at him. His eyes immediately find Li.
“Uh, hey?” Li says and waves. Felix and Niko slow next to our table, while the host waits to take them to another section of the restaurant.
“This is a weird coincidence. Is everyone craving pizza today?” Felix asks.
“I guess so,” I reply.
“Huh. Well…” He glances around the table and over to Niko. “I hope you guys have a good time. Glad you’re celebrating.”
He moves to walk away, and I make a snap decision. Maybe things are messed up with Max, but I don’t want this animosity to continue next year after I’ve graduated. If there’s a way to make things less awkward for Li and Felix, I want to do it.
“Actually, do you want to sit with us? We can make room.” I nod to the guard, who all stare at me with overly large eyes like I casually mentioned having a serial killer sit down with us.
Niko also looks alarmed. “I don’t…”
Felix blinks, then recovers. “I think it’s a great idea. Marching band is almost over, and you guys already won the bet, so we might as well get to know each other.” Felix grabs a chair from another table and pulls it over to Li. “Can I squeeze in here?”
She grins and scoots over.
There’s a fair amount of maneuvering to make space, and a bit of quiet grumbling, but we make it work. Once we’re settled and the guys have given their drink orders, we all sit in silence. What in the world do we talk about now?
“It doesn’t seem like you’re celebrating,” Felix tells me. “So, I assume that means you’re moping too?”
I cover my face with my hands. Welp, I guess we have that as a discussion topic.
A few guard members chuckle and Li nudges him.
“What?” he asks. “You and Max weren’t nearly as secretive as you thought you were.”
“Thanks for ruining the milkshakes Saturday, by the way,” Niko replies.
“And thanks to Max for ruining their relationship,” Madisyn snaps.
“Oh, don’t get me started on him. He’s such a mess it’s not even funny.” Niko rolls his eyes. “I don’t know how we’re going to get through practices with him acting like that.”
Felix sighs. “Brody’s going to smell blood in the water if Max isn’t careful.”
“I thought I saw Max talking to Sire when I was leaving today,” Addison says, leaning in. I should have known Madisyn, Addison, and Devin would become completely invested once they recognized the drama happening. Those three love their gossip. “Sire looked angry. Do you know what that was about?”
Niko and Felix shake their heads. “No idea.”
“I don’t want to know,” Niko says. “All I want is to get through state next Saturday.”
“Us too,” Callie says. “Though we’ll be the ones earning Superiors again.”
Felix shrugs. “Whatever. At this point, I don’t care anymore.”
“I’m over it,” Niko replies.
“I’m over it too,” Deja says. Her cheeks grow red when everyone looks at her. “I hate competition.”
“Why does everything have to be about marching band all the time?” Keira asks. “Sometimes I just want to eat pizza and talk about Dancing with the Stars.”
“I love that show,” Devin says immediately.
“My mom always has it on,” Niko replies. “She complains about the judges every week.”
“As she should!”
Several other people jump in with their thoughts and I sit back, both surprised and happy.
This isn’t exactly a celebration dinner, or a moping fest, but it might be something even more rare: a normal conversation between color guard and percussion members.
Someone needs to call the Catholic Church, because I think I might be a miracle worker.