9. Liliana
Chapter 9
Liliana
I climb inside Smithy’s SUV and clip my seatbelt. Smithy walks around the car with his hands stuffed inside his pockets. He’s been acting weird tonight and I'm not really sure how to feel about it.
He keeps acting like we’re a couple, then he reminds me of how we’re best friends. It’s like neither one of us knows what our relationship is or how we’re supposed to act.
The drive to Smithy’s house is almost silent. We’re each lost in our own mind. When we pull up to a red light, Smithy glances over at me. He doesn’t flash me a dazzling smile or anything, we just stare at each other.
As the light turns green, he moves his attention back to the road. Without looking away, he slips his hand into mine and squeezes gently.
When we pull into his garage, we climb out and head inside the house. He’s quiet as he grabs two bottles of water and then leads me straight to his room.
Though I hang out here all the time, we rarely spend any time in his room. When we do, it’s because I'm helping him pick out what to wear for a work event, but never to hang out.
“Do you need help picking out clothing for an event?” I ask as I hop onto his bed and bounce a few times.
“No.” He frowns at my out of the blue question as he untucks his shirt and begins unbuttoning it.
“Then why are we in your room?”
“Well, I was thinking we could watch TV in here and relax, rather than in the living room.” He lets his shirt fall off his shoulders and tosses it onto a chair in the corner.
My gaze trails up and down his bare torso. I'm drinking in every inch of exposed skin even though I know I shouldn’t. I need to remember we’re just friends.
“Sweets?”
“Yeah?” I squeak out as I rip my gaze away from his chest and meet his eyes.
“What are you staring at, Sweets?”
“Uh… nothing. I'm just wondering why some guys wax their chests and some don’t.”
“Do you have an opinion on this?” His lips quirk up on one side, giving him a lopsided grin.
“I… I think I like the hair. It makes you look more masculine.”
“Good. I didn’t really want to start waxing.” He grimaces as he scratches his chest.
“Would you really start waxing if I said I preferred a bare chest?”
“I’d do just about anything to make you happy, Sweets.” He drops his chin, staring at me through his lashes. He slowly begins unbuttoning his jeans and watches me. “What’s your opinion on boxers?”
“I… uh… I…” The few noises I'm able to get out die on my tongue as his jeans fall to the floor and Smithy is left standing in front of me in a pair of black boxer briefs and nothing else.
The fabric molds to his muscular form and leaves little to the imagination. I swallow hard and try to tear my gaze away from him, but it’s impossible.
“I’m up here, Sweets,” he murmurs. His voice has become deeper and raspy. It sounds like he’s barely hanging onto his control and that has me lifting my gaze to meet his.
“I think whatever is most comfortable is the right option for you,” I’m barely able to squeak out.
“Right.” He smirks as he grabs a pair of gray sweatpants out of his dresser and slips them on. “Do you want something else to wear? That can't be comfortable.” He nods to my jeans and shirt.
“No, it’s fine. It’s not like I'm sleeping in this. I’ll change when I get home.”
“You’re not going home tonight, beautiful. You’re staying here.”
My heart hammers a little harder against my ribs as Smithy closes the distance between us and tilts my chin up so I'm staring right into his eyes.
“Oh,” the word comes out as a whisper and I want to facepalm myself. What is wrong with me tonight? Why have I lost the ability to speak in complete sentences? I sound like an idiot.
He lets his fingers trail down my neck and they pause at the base. He’s staring down at me and I'm sure he can see the swell of my breasts rising and falling rapidly with each breath I take.
“I’ll get you a t-shirt of mine to wear. I think you’ll be too hot in a sweatshirt.”
He quickly grabs a shirt for me, then he’s standing in front of me again. My hands tremble as I try to untie the knot of my button up shirt. No matter how many times I try, I can't seem to get it undone.
“Let me,” Smithy murmurs as he pushes my hands to the side. He kneels in front of me and takes his time untying the knot. He slowly pushes the fabric down my shoulders and my breath comes out in a shudder.
I want to scream and beg him to put me out of my misery. To touch me the way I want him to and give into this craziness even if it’s just for tonight.
Tomorrow we can go back to being best friends and pretend this never happened… but I’m not sure I could ever return to what we have now if I take that leap with him. Once I’ve experienced all of him, I’d never be able to let go.
Smithy’s phone rings, breaking the near silence of the room. The only thing that could be heard was our labored breaths. He lets out a low groan as he reaches for the device.
“Shit, I need to take this. It’s my manager. I’ll be right back.” He stands to his full height as he accepts the call. He exits the room to take the call in private, but right before he’s out of sight, I watch him adjust himself and notice how turned on he was.
I scramble to find my phone and call Winnie as quickly as I can.
“Hello?” She asks over the noise of the bar. “Wheeler! Stop it!” She giggles.
“Winnie! I need to talk to you right now! Go somewhere quiet!” I hiss into the phone, hating how my hands are still trembling and I can barely control myself. I want him so badly and I don’t know what to do.
“Ok, hold on.” She murmurs something on the other side of the line and a few seconds later, her side is almost silent. “What’s wrong?”
“Smithy stripped down in front of me to only his boxer briefs,” I whisper.
“Okay…”
“And then he said I'm staying at his house tonight and he got me a t-shirt to wear. I don’t know what to do Winnie! I’m freaking out! He’s been really touchy feely and he was staring at my boobs. He untied my shirt because my hands were shaking too much and gave me one of his shirts to wear. Then his phone rang and popped our little bubble. Before he left to take a call from his manager, he adjusted himself and he was really turned on,” I say in one quick exhale and take a deep breath before I get dizzy.
“Liliana, he’s falling hard for you. He wasn’t flirting with other women at the bar and his sole focus was on you,” she says with sympathy in her voice. “I know you’re freaking out right now, but I think he’s finally willing to show you how he feels.”
“How do I know this is real though? What if this is just a fling? I don’t want to be a fling, Winnie!” I practically shout as I begin to panic.
“I don’t think Smithy would ever view you as a fling. He wouldn’t risk losing you.”
“So, what do I do?”
“Personally, I’d keep things in the friend-zone for now. The date with Kevin is all lined up for next week. If you want to be sure you aren’t just a fling, wait until a day or two before your date and let him know about it. He’ll make a move then.”
“Are you sure?”
“Yes. I think he’ll panic and make a move faster. Plus, if he isn't serious about you, he’ll let you go on the date.”
“Ok,” I whisper, my stomach sinking at the thought of this not being real.
“It’s going to be ok, Lils. You just need to stay calm tonight.”
“I can do that. I can act like everything is normal.” I nod my head with determination even though Winnie can't see me.
“If you need an excuse to leave, text me. I’ll call you crying and beg you to come over. I’ll say Wheeler did something stupid and it upset me.”
“Thanks, Win, you’re the best.”
“I know. Good luck, Lils. It’s going to be fine. Also, ditch the bra when you put on his shirt,” she singsongs.
She hangs up before I can say anything else. She’s the greatest female friend I’ve ever had. My relationship with her is completely different from my relationship with Smithy though. I can't even compare them.
I quickly strip off my shirt and jeans. I nibble on my bottom lip, trying to decide if I should listen to Winnie’s advice and lose the bra. On one hand, I want to see how Smithy will respond. On the other, I’m a little scared of what might happen.
I want to know though. Before I can talk myself out of it, I unhook my bra and toss it on his bed. Slipping his shirt over my head, I only keep on my underwear. I lift the collar of his shirt and inhale deeply. It smells like him.
I'm picking up my jeans when Smithy walks back into the room. He’s mumbling something to himself and staring down at his phone. He lifts his gaze and pauses mid-stride when his eyes lock on me.
“Damn, I didn’t expect you to look that good in my shirt.” His gaze trails up and down my form, stopping on my breasts for longer than I expected. He swallows hard and scrubs a hand over his mouth.
“What are we going to watch?” I fight to keep my tone even as I climb onto his bed and settle with my back against his headboard.
“Whatever you want. I'm pretty sure I'm going to be busy watching you,” he murmurs under his breath so quietly I almost don’t hear him. Maybe I heard him wrong.
“What’d you say?”
His attention snaps to my face and he shakes his head. “I said whatever you want is fine with me.”
He slips under the covers and lays on his back with an arm tucked behind his head. He frowns when he realizes I'm still lying on top of the blankets.
“C’mon, Sweets. Cuddle with me.”
I slide under the covers next to him and he instantly tugs me into his side. He has his arms wrapped around me before I can even process what’s going on.
We’re silent as we watch a show. I have no clue what’s going on in it. I'm too focused on how it feels to be in Smithy’s arms.
His hand slips under the hem of the t-shirt and his fingers brush up and down my spine. He gets up to where my bra strap should be, and halts his movements for a second. I peek up at him without moving my head and find his brows drawn together. He moves his fingers a little higher and swallows hard before trailing his touch back down my back.
He doesn’t stop for the next hour. He’s constantly touching me and whispering things in my ear.
“Can we sleep like this every night?” He murmurs against my neck. This feels so intimate. Like so much more than friends.
I don’t respond. Not because I don’t want to, but I'm not exactly sure how to respond. I couldn’t do this nightly unless he was mine. My heart couldn’t take it. But how do I tell him that? How do I convince him we should be together?