KAT
Rowdy’s hostility toward Farley surprised me. I didn’t remember Rowdy ever saying anything negative about his friend that would have led to his current aggressive attitude.
Maria’s behavior made more sense to me. Farley was a handsome guy. His brown hair was shorter than Rowdy’s, just above his shoulders. His eyes were a warm brown. His smile felt genuine, unlike most men’s.
Maria didn’t have a “type.” She had dated doctors, EMTs, and a sanitation worker.
Maria never got past the early fun parts of dating.
Something always turned her off. With the doctor who took her on a weekend getaway, she returned thinking he was too controlling.
She always found something wrong with the men.
That was normal, I assumed. Dating was about trying out people to find the right one.
Of course, I had taken a different, slightly nuttier route to find my guy.
“Is your sister horny for Farley?” Rowdy whispered to me once we left the nursery.
Smiling, I poked at his chest. “Don’t try so hard to set up Maria. You can’t force these things.”
“You get how that works for us, too, right? I’m not forcing myself to be with you because of the boys.”
“I get that, sometimes,” I said, fighting with my insecurities. “But other times, I become so in awe of you that I can’t imagine you’d really want me.”
Rowdy smirked, making his handsome face especially gorgeous. “Well, I am fucking great, and a man like me wants the best. That’s what you are.”
Hugging Rowdy, I didn’t feel sexy or wild enough for him. Of course, even if I thought he deserved better, I wasn’t giving him up.
“Is Farley nice?” I whispered against Rowdy’s ear. “Be honest. No bros-before-hoes loyalty. Tell me straight.”
“He’s super sensitive and loyal. He also tends to get taken advantage of by bad women.”
I glanced back at the nursery where Maria spoke with Farley about the boys’ sleeping habits. He seemed overly interested, which made me smile.
“They’re flirting,” I cooed and grabbed Rowdy’s ass. “It’s so sweet.”
“I remember when I flirted with you at the Fire Hooch. You took so little convincing to climb on my dick. At the time, I thought you were a slut, but now I know you were dealing with a decade-long hard-on.”
“Delusional,” I muttered and shoved him off me. “Don’t you remember when I nearly changed my mind before we climbed into my back seat? If so, you must also remember how you got whiny and begged.”
Rowdy’s ego remained undaunted. “I recall turning on the charm. There was no begging.”
Refusing to back down, I insisted, “No, when I said I should probably head home, you teared up and fell to your knees.”
Rowdy laughed. “If you keep flirting with me like you are now, I’ll be on my knees and crying in no time.”
After glancing toward the nursery to ensure we didn’t have an audience, I murmured, “I offered to give you relief.”
“Are we talking about oral or a handy? I think I might be okay with one of those.”
“It’s oral, isn’t it?” I muttered and moved away from him. “I won’t swallow. It’s against my moral code.”
When I attempted to flee from him, Rowdy pinned me to the huge fridge. “I’ll bring a bucket to bed,” he murmured against my ear.
Despite squirming to break free of his powerful body, I laughed at his offer and asked, “Why not a handy?”
Rowdy took my hands in his and kissed the knuckles on each one. “These are the hands that hold my boys. I can’t jizz all over them.”
“Uh, but I kiss the boys with my mouth.”
“Not the inside of your mouth.”
Back in high school, I couldn’t read Rowdy. When he teased me, I took his taunts personally. When he asked me on a date, I assumed he was messing with me again.
Now, I could see through his bullshit and finally get the joke.
No longer squirming to break free, I kissed his hands and murmured, “I’ve read masturbation is safe a month after giving birth. As much as I’d love to have you stroke my clit tonight, these are the hands that touch my sons.”
Rowdy lost his grin and said with utter sincerity. “I very much want to touch your clit tonight.”
“How about you talk to Farley to see if he’s interested in Maria? I’ll ask her about Farley. If our notes are mutually romantic, I’ll let you touch my clit, and you can bring that bucket to bed?”
Rowdy kissed me, softly at first and then with more urgency as if his mind was already playing out the fun we’d share in his bed tonight.
Our kissing nearly ended twice. Both times, we smiled at each other and went for one more peck before giving in to our lust.
Finally, I thought of Maria in the nursery with a man she might like and Rowdy’s parents who were clearly enjoying the show.
My sister had been willing to give up so much for me.
In return, I could at least stop making out with Rowdy long enough to have a chat about her possible interest in the handsome biker.
Rowdy and I returned to the nursery to find Pax and Bebe snickering to each other while sitting on the twin-sized bed. The boys were content in Colson’s crib, resting on their sides and facing each other. I smiled at how they gurgled and stared curiously.
Patting Farley’s back, Rowdy asked to talk to him in the hallway about the “Goblin situation.” Once the men left the condo, I asked Bebe to watch the boys. Maria frowned when I gestured for her to leave the room and follow me to the kitchen.
“Are you into Farley?” I whispered.
Maria’s eyes widened. “No, why?”
“No?”
“I mean, yeah,” she said and inched closer. “Was it obvious?”
“It was to me since I know you.”
Maria’s eyes lit up. “He’s very handsome, but lots of men are handsome. I don’t know what came over me.”
“There’s nothing wrong with flirting with a single guy.”
“No, my behavior was inappropriate. Rowdy’s parents were sitting right there.”
Grinning, I wrapped my arms around her body and held on tightly. “You’re adorable when you’re hot for a guy.”
Maria hugged me back. “I was so startled when he entered the condo. I think that’s why I acted weird.”
“You weren’t weird. You were just friendly.”
“He’s probably got a girlfriend.”
“No, Rowdy’s already got you two married. He wouldn’t act like that if Farley had a girlfriend.”
“Married?” Maria asked, releasing me and frowning.
“He figures if you marry Farley that you’ll stay nearby forever.”
Maria burst into laughter. “He’s so odd.”
“Rowdy takes whatever he wants. His behavior seems strange to us because we play things safely.”
Maria fought an eye roll. “You hooked up with Rowdy and lied to his face. That wasn’t safe.”
“Yes, I’m aware, but Rowdy brings out this other side of me. Usually, I’m not impulsive like that.”
“True.”
“Let’s stop talking about my behavior and focus on yours,” I said, making Maria grin. “What do you like about Farley?”
“I told you,” Maria said and shrugged. “He’s handsome and friendly. It’s nothing more complicated than that.”
“It never is,” Pax said, startling us both. He looked back at Bebe still in the nursery and grinned. “You see that, babe? I’ve still got my stealth moves.”
Bebe called out, “Are you bothering the girls?”
“No,” Pax insisted and winked at me. “I’m just eavesdropping on their conversation.”
Bebe rolled her dark eyes, but I also caught her grinning at Pax’s behavior.
“Got a hankering for biker dick, do you?” Pax asked Maria, who inched back. “I hope so because that biker has a hankering for you.”
“What’s Farley like?” I asked.
“Well, he’s the kind of weird that comes from having two moms.”
Joining us in the kitchen, Bebe bumped Pax and shook her head. “Don’t say that.”
“He’s sensitive like a girl. All those ladies babied him too much.”
“His moms are members of the Everything Nice Crew,” Bebe explained to Maria and me. When we only stared at her, she dumbed it down for us by saying, “They’re an all-female motorcycle club. Or maybe they’re more like a girls-only crime organization. I don’t know if they all ride motorcycles.”
Bebe looked at Pax, who shrugged. “I never polled them. Can’t say I know who does what within the ENC.”
Bebe shrugged. “Well, they’re tough women who helped the Little Memphis club take over this town.”
Maria and I weren’t well-versed in current local crime politics, let alone educated on what happened decades ago. We glanced at each other and stepped closer to Bebe.
“Are his moms scary?” I asked.
“Sure. They’re criminals.”
Maria and I glanced at each other before I mumbled, “But Rowdy’s a criminal.”
“Yeah, and he’s scary,” Bebe said while Pax wrapped an arm around her shoulders and nodded.
Maria asked, “So are Farley’s moms scary like Rowdy’s scary?”
Pax shook his head. “No, you haven’t seen Rowdy act scary yet.”
“Stop freaking them out,” Bebe admonished and smiled at Maria. “Farley is always well-behaved. You have nothing to worry about.”
“They’re going to like you,” Pax said and scratched at his bearded jaw. “You’re not a lying bitch, are you?”
“No,” Maria said and glanced at me as if thinking they might be criticizing my secrets.
Pax ignored our reaction and explained, “Farley’s had a run of bad girlfriends. Liars, thieves, lots of drama queens looking to use him for his money.”
Maria looked a little horrified by this information and asked, “Is that what he wants in a woman?”
“No, he just wants to take care of women,” Bebe said, sensing my sister’s worry. “When bad women realize he’s sensitive, they take advantage of him. He has trouble seeing past their tears and sob stories. Clint had to get rid of the last one because she kept coming back.”
“Maybe he loved the woman.”
“Naw, nothing loveable about that twat,” Pax said. “I met her once at the clubhouse. She was a rude shit toward Vanessa. Oh, but when Farley showed up, she started batting her eyes and acting all sad and soft.”
Maria frowned at me. She wasn’t the kind of woman who put up with men’s bullshit. If a relationship wasn’t working, she walked away. I was the same way except when it came to Rowdy.
The boys broke the tension brewing in the kitchen by fussing in their nursery. Bebe hurried over to the fridge.
“Their tummies have settled from the trip. I’ll get their bottles ready.”
I smiled at Rowdy’s mom. She was so excited about every little thing the boys did. The way she instantly and completely loved them filled me with a sense of safety I hadn’t enjoyed since Lora died.
In the nursery, Maria and I each took a fussy baby. I sighed at the feel of Cavan in my arms.
In my mother’s journal, she stressed over her lack of maternal instinct. I wasn’t sure I had a talent for motherhood, either. I was loyal to my sister, and I always took care of our cats. But that didn’t mean I could be the mom that my boys deserved.
I mostly worried I wouldn’t love them enough. Or I’d stop loving them. People seemed to turn off their feelings so easily. I worried the only reason I was loyal to Maria was that we were twins.
Now, though, my heart was so full of love as I held my boy. I adored his brother and my sister. I was in love with Rowdy. I ached to get closer to his parents and sisters. My fears of being cold felt silly when I was surrounded by my favorite people.