Chapter 12
NATHAN
Ididn’t know what had possessed me to ask Aiden out on a date. I didn’t date. Ever. Not once, and there were good reasons for that. Reasons Aiden would never know.
But now I’d put myself in a situation where I’d be expected to put on a performance and act like a normal person. To act like his Daddy and I wasn’t sure if I could do that.
Fuck.
But I’d do what I could. I’d protect him any way and every way that I could. Starting with not letting him drive, and since he’d seemed apprehensive about our late-night date, I ordered a ride-share before we left the bathroom.
Because I could be a fucking gentleman.
As we waited for the ride-share, we leaned against the outside of the club wall. I watched him fidget with his phone, obviously nervous. Looking down at my own phone, I saw that the driver was still a couple minutes away.
“If you don’t want to go, please don’t feel obligated.”
His head popped up, eyes wide with surprise.
“Oh. Um. No. I don’t. Feel obligated.” He looked back at his phone, lower lip caught between his teeth.
The look of concentration on his face was adorable, like he was trying to solve a problem.
I wondered if that was what he looked like at work, when he was trying to make the evidence of his cases fit and catch killers.
Killers like me. Fuck. I really shouldn’t have asked him out. I shouldn’t have slept with him in the first place.
What the fuck is wrong with me?
I stared at him and part of me wished I had killed him in the hotel room that night. Or I should have taken him and had some fun with the kill. But the thought made me sick.
Because he was mine. But the war still raged inside whether the claim I staked should be him as my victim or my boy.
All I knew was that I needed him. More than I needed anything else in this world. But I’d never had to worry about feelings before, not like this.
“Wait.” He hesitated a moment. Like he wasn’t sure he wanted to ask what he was thinking. “Did you feel obligated to ask me out?”
Wait. What?
Now, I was the one who was confused. Did he really think that? After all that?
“No?” How the hell had so many of our wires gotten crossed?
I let out a sigh that turned the night air white and pulled him against me. My fingers danced along his spine, in what I hoped was a soothing manner, as I wrapped my other arm around his waist and held on tight.
Nothing ever felt as right as having him pressed against me. Not even the blood of my victims cooling on my skin, and that was a fucking heady feeling that was better than any high I’d ever experienced.
“I’m right where I want to be, little bird.”
The way he melted against me, at my words, made something melt within me. A warm, gooey feeling in my chest that bloomed as he looked up at me under impossibly long lashes. His eyes full of trust for a man who never should have let me touch him, let alone given him an ounce of trust.
But I knew, in that moment, I’d do everything in my power to earn that trust every day. Even when he didn’t know how hard I had to work at it.
I leaned down, my lips grazing his, just as headlights bathed us in warm light.
Aiden laughed as he pulled away, craning his neck at the approaching vehicle. “Is this us?”
Grumbling, I looked up the information in the app and herded my little bird into the car once I confirmed it was our ride. Since it was late, there weren’t many options for dinner, but thankfully, he didn’t seem picky and his eyes lit up when I suggested burgers from his favorite place.
I wasn’t sure if it was because there was so much alcohol in his system that the greasy food sounded good or if he was excited about the prospect of us having something in common.
He’d never known it was from me stalking him and watching him stop at the same place at least twice a week on his lunch while he was working.
Thinking of how much takeout he ate made me frown. It wasn’t very healthy, and I wondered if I could convince him to at least get some salads to go with it once in a while, and maybe some fruit. I didn’t want something to happen to my little bird because he didn’t take care of his health.
And it was my job to take care of him now, since I was his Daddy.
It was a terrifying notion that made me a little dizzy. A half-cocked thought that was out of my mouth before my brain could filter it. As I looked at him, snuggled in my arms, I couldn’t regret it, though. Not when I had him.
Thankfully, the drive was short. I wasn’t sure how much Aiden had to drink before the two shots at the bar, but in the ten-minute car ride, he’d nodded off and curled into me.
The way he tucked himself under my arm made my heart thud in my chest. He had me wrapped so completely around his little finger, that I realized with a start that I’d do anything for him.
Which was very dangerous. For both of us.
“Wake up, little bird. We’re here.” The car slowed to a stop as the driver pulled into the parking lot. It was mostly empty, thankfully, so there shouldn’t be too much of a wait for me to get my little bird fed.
His head slowly lifted from my shoulder, eyes glassy in that way they get from waking when you’ve just fallen asleep but had already gone in deep. I chuckled as I unbuckled and opened the door.
“Come on, baby. You need to eat. Out.”
He grumbled as he slid across the seat, his cheeks burning red, clearly embarrassed. I wasn’t sure why. But it was a cute look that I knew I’d never get tired of seeing.
I closed the door behind him and led him into the diner. He blinked a few times, the lights too bright for his sensitive eyes. As the hostess sat us at a table, he looked around, assessing the room.
When the hostess asked for our drink order, I asked if we could just start off with two waters. With a smile and a nod, she placed our menus on the table and left us to wait for our waitress.
“For as much as I love this place, I don’t think I’ve ever seen the inside of this place beyond the hostess stand at the front.” He gave a soft chuckle as he sat down.
“Oh? How come?” That surprised me. I knew he was busy with work a lot, but I assumed he would have had other dates here, considering how much he loved the place.
He shrugged and looked at the menu as though it were the most interesting thing in the world. “I dunno. Guess I never really saw the point in coming here and eating alone.”
Huh. So he really didn’t bring dates here? Or Victoria? That didn’t make sense, especially since he loved the place so much.
“Why alone? Surely you could bring any number of friends or dates here.” He had friends, unlike me. So I couldn’t understand why he seemed so lonely. But the uncomfortable look that flashed across his face had me pulling back from that line of questioning.
“Umm… I…” He refused to look at me, his eyes focused on the menu that I wasn’t sure he was actually looking at. Not that he needed to. He got the same heart attack burger every damn time.
“Sorry, that’s none of my business.” I cut him off before he felt the need to explain himself to me. There was no need for that. Not yet. Not ever.
Despite my overwhelming desire to know every little thing about him, I never wanted to make him feel uncomfortable. I wanted to be his safe space. And if that wasn’t a kick in the pants, I didn’t know what was. Because I wasn’t safe. But I would be, for him.
The awkward moment was broken by the waitress coming over with our drink order that the hostess had taken and getting our dinner order. Without thinking, I ordered for both of us and as she walked away, Aiden stared at me, mouth open.
I tried to read his expression, but it was so guarded. The way his forehead was scrunched, it was obvious he was trying to figure something out. Hated to tell him, but I wasn’t a puzzle anyone could solve.
My stomach sank as I realized I had probably already ruined my chances of getting a second date, and we hadn’t even gotten our food yet. I didn’t even know what I’d done.
“You ordered for me?” It wasn’t an accusation, but it also was more than just a statement.
Oh.
Leaning back in my chair, I folded my hands in front of me and studied him. “I did. Does that bother you?”
The way he squirmed in his seat was a clear indicator of how much it wasn’t a problem. But the look on his face told a different story. I wasn’t sure which one to believe.
“No,” he said slowly, as he let out a breath. “But you ordered my specific burger that I get every time. Down to my customizations.”
My hand froze with my glass halfway to my mouth.
Fuck, fuck, fuck. Did I? I did, didn’t I?
Like a deer in headlights, I stared across the table at him. A cop. He literally could have arrested me right then and there for stalking and had a solid case because that man had the strangest burger order.
I was so fucking screwed.
“I, umm, I can explain.” Yeah. Sure, I could. But the explanation wasn’t going to be any better than anything he could come up with on his own.
His face shuttered. Fuck. I hated that.
“Just like I’m sure you can explain the bird figurine you left on my porch.” He ran his fingers through his hair and choked out a brittle laugh.
“Aiden.” I tried to figure out something to say, but there was nothing. Nothing could make any of it better. I wasn’t equipped for this. I should have just left him alone and I was going to pay the price for my greed.
“I—” He held up his hand to silence me and I snapped my mouth shut. It was fine. I didn’t really have anything to say anyway. Not really. Platitudes. Excuses.
From across the table, his wet eyes met mine. “Is showing up at the same club I was at, at the same time I was there, also something you can explain?”
I tried to swallow past the lump in my throat, but I felt like I couldn’t breathe. There wasn’t enough air in the room. Everything I had worked toward, I was about to lose it all because of one stupid mistake.
Isn’t that what brings down all serial killers?
My breathing was ragged, fists clenched tight on the table.
I had to fight every instinct because I wouldn’t fight him.
The scraping of his chair jerked me back to reality.
But instead of coming toward me with cuffs in his hands, he stalked off, away from our table.
I wasn’t sure where he was going, but there was a war raging inside of me.
One part of me urged me to run, to flee, to survive.
The other part of me screamed to go after him, to protect him.
There weren’t even any dangers nearby. But the urge to protect him would always be there, and it would always win.
Resigned, I stood and went to take a step, but he spun back toward me.
“No. You sit back down until… Fuck. Just sit back down.” There was fire in his eyes. Worse, under that a hurt I had caused, and I was sure I wouldn’t get the chance to fix it. But fuck, I would if he gave me even half a chance.
I put my hands up in defeat without a word. He eyed me as I sat back down and waited for him to decide my fate.
When he walked out of the room, I still had the opportunity to flee, to activate one of my escape plans. But the thought of leaving him behind was worse than any punishment he could come up with.
My hands on the table, I sat back and waited for my little bird to come back with his judgment.