Chapter 17
NATHAN
My little bird flew the coop and I felt like he took my heart with him. Before him, I wouldn’t have even thought it was possible, that I could love or give my heart to someone. But I had, and then he ran from me, taking with him most of the pieces, only leaving behind enough to keep me alive.
I still hadn’t been able to grab Clint, and it pissed me off.
Part of me wondered if I was able to offer him up as a sacrifice and present him as an offering to Aiden, if he would find his way back to me.
Though, I also knew the likelihood of it being for the reason I wanted it to be, would be slim.
More than likely, it would be with suspicion as to why the guy I manhandled at the club suddenly showed up dead and mutilated.
“You’d think he’d have some empathy, right?” Leaning down, I stared at the man tied to the chair as he struggled against the ropes that had his hands and feet bound together. “But no, it’s been radio silence. Won’t return my calls or my texts.”
My hand grabbed the man’s chin, pulling him closer. “That’s a little rude, don’t you think? I tell him I want to lay the world at his feet, but his mother hears him call me Daddy one time and he thinks he can run from me? After I promised to give him everything?”
I gripped the knife that dangled at my side. The anger burned through my veins like a fire I couldn’t extinguish.
Confusion. Betrayal. Hurt.
When I had dropped Aiden back at his house and he asked if he could have a raincheck for breakfast, I hadn’t wanted to leave him. Every instinct had screamed at me not to leave him alone. And they’d been right.
My boy had shut me out. I didn’t know how to care about people, and this was why it was useless. Pointless.
He didn’t want me now that he thought it was something shameful. Being with a man was fine, he knew his parents accepted that, but he didn’t know how to accept that they could accept him wanting, needing a Daddy.
Because he thought he was supposed to be the one in control, the one to provide and protect. He didn’t understand it didn’t have to work that way. That he could be strong and still be vulnerable.
I stared at Jared Mackay and sneered as he screamed behind the gag I had shoved in his mouth.
Usually, I enjoyed listening to the screams and pleading of my victims, but none of it brought me joy since my little bird ran away from me.
After a few hours of his incessant sniveling, I’d needed to drown out his cries.
Briefly, I wondered if my monster would still be sated if I no longer found the wonder and satisfaction that I used to.
“How did someone I’ve only known for such a short time get so embedded under my skin? He shouldn’t mean that much to me in such a short amount of time. Yet, I find that losing him has meant losing a part of myself.”
My gaze wandered up to meet Jared’s.
“Have you ever had someone in your life like that?” I cocked my head and considered him but dismissed the notion. Most likely, he was just as alone as I was. Otherwise, he wouldn’t have been seeking out the company of young boys and girls.
Baring my teeth, I thought about ripping his throat out and bathing in his blood. I might have needed to satisfy a monster, but even I had rules and wouldn’t go after children, and certainly not for the things he was after. There were worse monsters than me out there, and he was proof of that.
After two days of keeping that piece of scum tied in one of my empty warehouses, it was time to take out the trash.
“Well, Jared, thanks for sticking around and listening.” I stood and walked behind him, my blade gripped tightly in my hand, arm outstretched. His muffled screams did nothing as he tried to move away, as I knew he had nowhere to go, no way to escape.
I raised the blade and brought it up to his throat, no desire for my usual flair, no drive to draw it out.
All I wanted was to get it over with and go home, even though I’d be alone.
Feeling nothing, no rush of euphoria or bliss filling the emptiness inside, I drew the blade across his throat and let the blood spray.
Jared’s blood dripped down his body and pooled onto the plastic sheeting I had lined on the floor, the sheeting on the wall catching the arterial spray. If I were an artist, I would have called it a masterpiece, but I wasn’t that vain.
His body twitched and convulsed as the last dregs of life left him with a pathetic gurgle.
My head fell forward, as though I were praying, except there was no God I believed in. No higher power could exist and have created me the way I was, have allowed me to become the man I was, or other men to be like me, or worse.
No God would have given me a glimpse of heaven with my little bird, just to snatch it away.
I wiped my blade off on Jared’s shoulder and turned to make my way to where I had stashed my clean-up supplies, when a faint noise caught my attention from the other side of the warehouse. My head whipped around, gaze seeking where the noise could have come from. No one else should have been there.
The warehouse was mostly empty except for a few large machines left by the previous owners of the building. Everything that could be easily discarded, I had already had cleared out. Which left very little room for an intruder to hide.
My hand slipped into the waistband of my pants and slowly withdrew my gun, trying to conceal the movement from whoever was there.
Acting as nonchalant as possible, I went over to where I had my supplies and rooted around, casting furtive glances around the vast space from the new angle. But I was still unable to see anything.
Either they were moving with me to remain undetected, or they were very good at hiding.
Frustrated, I drew in a deep breath and tried to center myself and remain calm. It wouldn’t do any good to charge into a situation unprepared. I didn’t know who was there or if they were armed.
Fuck. What if it’s the police? Worse, what if it’s Aiden?
No. I couldn’t let myself panic. The likelihood that he would have been able to figure out my little secret from the few times we were together was slim. It was a big leap from stalking to being a serial killer.
Wasn’t it? Honestly, I wasn’t sure, but I hoped so.
Making it seem as though I were leaving, I headed for the big heavy doors.
The hairs on the back of my neck stood, letting me know I was being watched, which was interesting considering it was the first indicator I’d had since I’d dragged Jared into the warehouse two days ago that there was any danger lurking.
When I got to the doors, instead of opening them and leaving, I slammed my palm against the switch on the wall, flooding the open space with bright light and activating the machines that I knew were still hooked up.
Anyone who broke in would have assumed an abandoned building would have no electricity.
But they wouldn’t have known it wasn’t exactly abandoned.
There was a flash of movement on the other end of the warehouse, behind one of the large machines. It was almost obscured, if not for the dark clothing that had allowed the intruder to initially blend in. But now it made the unmistakable figure of a man stand out against the brightly lit room.
“Stop right there.” My voice was steady and commanding, and I raised the gun to point at the retreating man, who froze instantly at the sound of the hammer cocking.
I slowly made my way toward him, watching as he stood rigid, slowly raising his hands above his head to show he was unarmed. His heavy panting gave away his fear and finally kickstarted the predator in me to want to hunt and claim.
The trembling figure slowly turned, keeping his head down, still obscured by the hood of the sweatshirt he was wearing. “Please, sir.”
My eyes narrowed, breath catching at the words. There was something familiar that gripped around my heart and squeezed. I let my head fall to the side as I studied him. His stance was rigid, but the pose was submissive.
There was something that tugged and poked at the edges of my memory.
“Give me one good reason why I shouldn’t shoot you where you stand.” I wasn’t sure why I hadn’t done it already. Any other time, I would have without question, but something held me back.
His head snapped up and wide, fearful green eyes bore into mine.
Fuck.
Shit. Shit. Shit.
“Jesus Christ, Christian. What the fuck are you doing here?” I lowered the gun, lunged forward, and grabbed his arm. He tried to shake me off and back away, but after a moment, he fell to his knees, head bowed.
The perfect submissive.
But not my submissive.
No matter how much I knew he still wished it were true.
Though, maybe not anymore, depending on how much he had just witnessed. And he left me with a dilemma I never thought I’d be faced with, whether or not I needed to kill someone I knew for discovering my secret. Because I never thought I’d care enough about someone to think twice about killing them.
While I might not want a relationship with Christian like I did with Aiden, I did find that a part of me cared about what happened to him. He had become one of the very few people who I could count on one hand that I ever gave a fuck about.
And I didn’t like it.
I released his arm and tucked the gun back in its holster. “Why are you here? You must have followed me? Why?”
Christian looked up at me, tears in his eyes, but he didn’t shed them. He knew they didn’t work on me. “I’m sorry, Nathan. I… You had me worried.”
He shook his head and looked away. Except, his gaze landed on Jared’s dead body and his face paled. “Oh, God.”
My hand cupped his chin and forced him to look up at me. “He can’t help you, Christian. No one can.”