27. Kaitlyn #2
“I thought you were staying at the hospital last night?” I ask, trying to figure out how he can be here if he’s supposed to be there.
His face is clean shaven, and he’s close enough I can smell his citrus bodywash clinging to his golden skin.
It’s different from Hunter who always smells like fresh mint, and my head is starting to spin.
“My sister’s a card shark,” Bailey grumbles, removing his hand from my head. He takes a step back, and it feels easier to process saying something now that I’m not tempted to press my nose to his chest and inhale.
“You guys played poker last night in Javi’s hospital room?” I laugh in disbelief, slipping further into the shed to get my board ready.
“We played Go Fish!, and she kicked my ass. Since she won, she was going to sleep there last night, but Henry made some deal with her so she’d sleep here in a real bed.
I’m going back as soon as visiting hours start,” he explains, resuming working on his board.
“I guess I should’ve known you’d be out on dawn patrol this morning. ”
I reach to twist my necklaces before nodding. “If that’s okay?”
“Stop asking to share the ocean. It’s big enough for both of us,” he says, keeping the air light, which I appreciate because I wasn’t prepared to face Bailey for a couple more hours. I’m grateful he hasn’t brought yesterday up.
“I guess it is.”
“And the mermaids, of course,” B adds. It makes me think of Javi and how he asked me yesterday if I’d still be his friend. He’s really finding himself right at home here with the Walkers.
“Can’t forget about the mermaids,” I agree, and we fall into a quiet rhythm, touching up our boards.
When I’m satisfied with the tackiness, I look up only to find Bailey already watching .
. . me . Except, unlike me, he doesn’t smack his head on the wall behind him, or act embarrassed by being caught.
He just looks at me intensely in a way that makes heat pool in my lower stomach.
Hunter. You’re still dating his brother, even if it’s a fucked-up situation.
I exhale, clapping my hands in front of me, feeling my heart racing in my chest. “Ready?”
He nods, tucking his board up under his arm. I hold mine similarly, following his lead.
The waves are perfect, and the water’s warm. It’s enough for me to push all thoughts of how awful yesterday was to the back of my mind.
It feels good to focus only on surfing, and I let myself relax for the first time in a while as the sky turns an array of soft pastel colors.
Laughter bursts from my chest when he pops back up after wiping out, shaking his head like a dog after climbing back onto his board.
His smile is carefree as he positions his board right next to mine while we wait for the next wave.
We’re not the only ones enjoying the peaceful morning. In the distance, you can see other surfers along the coast enjoying the waves.
“What are you smiling about?” I ask, wondering if I should question if he hit his head on his board. If I had just been knocked off like he was, I don’t know if I’d be smiling, especially because I’m laughing at him.
“Because I like hearing you laugh, even if it’s at my expense,” he says, his eyes crinkled at the corners. “It’s better than seeing you sad, so just let me know how many more waves you want me to wipeout on if it’ll keep you laughing.”
“What?” I ask, my smile fading.
Bailey looks at me, his green eyes more of a sea foam color from the reflection of the water. “I’m sorry he’s leaving.”
I’m stunned into silence as we’re pushed back by a wave, missing my chance to paddle forward. “It’s complicated.”
It’s the only thing I can say instead of Hunter told me the truth .
“Are you okay?” he asks, and I look toward the horizon. I think we might be done surfing.
“I’m not sure. I’m confused, and not sure how I’m supposed to feel.”
Maybe in a parallel universe, we’d be in this exact same spot, but everything would be different.
Bailey stays silent, but I can tell he’s listening. He always has, except for the one time it counted. “That’s okay. You don’t need to know how you feel about it.”
I pull my braid over my shoulder, twisting the wet ends of my hair. “Shouldn’t I know how I feel?”
“Life is complicated, sunshine,” Bailey says, exhaling a ragged breath. “I can’t pretend to know why Hunter makes the choices he does. I love him, even if I don’t always like him.”
Sunshine? He’s never called me that before, but I think I kinda like it.
“I think that’s a very good way to put it. I don’t necessarily like who he is right now.” I love him, but I’m so fucking angry with him.
He nods slowly, seeming to hesitate before speaking again. “Are you happy with him?” Bailey asks, and I should lie right through my teeth to say the only appropriate answer. Except I don’t want to lie. There’s been enough of them, even if the truth is ugly.
“I don’t know, B. I really don’t know.”
“You deserve to be happy. I hope you know that.”
I meet his gaze, letting my worries wash away. “You do too. I’m really glad you came back, and I hope you stay.”
Bailey offers me a warm smile, and I wonder if he knows how bright he burns. If I didn’t have a handful of discarded canvases in my room at my parents’ house, I’d try to paint this exact moment to capture it forever. “I’m not going anywhere.”
The pastel hues of orange, purple, and pink blur together in the background, casting a soft glow around him.
I commit everything about this moment to memory. My heart seems to grow two sizes in my chest, beating erratically. I don’t think I knew how badly I needed to hear him say he’s staying until now. I smile back at him, unable to hide it. “Good. Maybe you’ll get better at surfing.”
He reaches into the water to splash me, and I think I have to admit that being around Bailey makes me happy. “Why don’t you show me how it’s done if you’re so good at it?”
“Not a problem,” I say, sticking my tongue out at him as I wait for the lull to start paddling further out.
As my board slices through the water under the early morning light, I feel good.
I feel happy.
I’d almost forgotten what it felt like.