28. Kaitlyn
CHAPTER TWENTY-EIGHT
Kaitlyn
PAST
I never wanted to be this girl.
Part of me thinks I should tell Hunter what happened between Bailey and me, but it feels pointless to dwell on it any longer since B has made it clear he doesn’t care.
Being with Hunter is easy. The more I think about it, he’s still my best friend, even if he’s also my boyfriend. He knows everything about me—well . . . almost everything.
God, I don’t even know how this fucking happened.
As much as I’m trying not to think about Bailey, I’m so worried about him.
He isn’t talking to anyone, and seems like he’s going through the motions.
He’s surrounded by a permanent storm cloud, giving off serious stay away vibes, and I don’t know what to do.
Every text I’ve sent him has gone unanswered, which is honestly starting to piss me off a little because I’m the one who was rejected, not him.
I get that it’s not a great look that I’m dating his twin a few weeks after, but if we’re really pretending the kiss never happened, he should still be acting like my best friend.
I knock on Bailey’s door again, but I can’t hear anything from inside his room. I told Hunter I forgot my water bottle in my car, but I need to fix this. The guilt is threatening to consume me, and I miss my best friend.
Maybe I shouldn’t give him a choice. I twist the handle, stepping into the room, but it’s empty. He’s not here. The door clicks shut behind me, and even though I’ve been in here countless times over the years, there’s something different.
There’s laundry on the floor in front of his dresser, which doesn’t shock me at all, and his bed is unmade.
Enough light is coming through the windows that I can see the glow-in-the-dark stars he put on his ceiling years ago.
He’s since traded them for the real ones in the night sky.
I look over the walls, and my gaze lands on the empty spot where I know a picture of Hunter and Bailey used to hang because I’m the one who took the photo. Hunter has the same one in his room.
The door opens, causing me to jump, but it’s just Bailey. His eyes widen when they land on me, and everything I had planned to say to him slips from my mind.
I reach for my necklaces to tug at the delicate metal, and I panic, talking straight out of my ass.
“I just came in here to talk to you because I miss you, and I’m not even sure that you miss me.
Which is okay, but this has gone on long enough—” I stop abruptly, spotting his headphones, and now I’m even more embarrassed.
He pulls them out, and I shift on the balls of my feet, feeling the full weight of his stare.
“I’m sorry. I was looking for you because I .
. .” I falter, glancing at the blank spot on the wall.
I clear my throat, setting my shoulders back because I’m in here for a reason.
“Because I miss you. We haven’t had a chance to talk about .
. .” Fuck. I shouldn’t bring that up. “Well, maybe you don’t miss me since you’re content to pretend it never happened. ”
Bailey only blinks in response, not revealing anything on his face, and the blankness hurts. What the hell is going on with him? Bailey, out of all the Walkers, has always been so full of life. He’s loud, chaotic, and impatient. He’s never been silent.
I would do anything to make him smile. I’m starting to forget what it feels like to be the one he’s smiling at, and it feels like he’s ripped my heart from my chest only to discard it like I mean nothing to him.
The space between us might as well be an ocean, and I just need Bailey to give me something , even if it’s him telling me he hates me.
“Bailey, please, talk to me. Anything. Just say something,” I plead, but it feels like he’s not even seeing me.
His jaw tightens, and he walks right past me, instead moving to grab a book off his shelves behind me.
If he’s hoping I’m going to give up easily, then he doesn’t know me very well.
“I didn’t mean for things to happen between me and Hunter. It just did.”
He keeps his back to me, and I wish I knew the right thing to say.
Instead, I take a chance by closing the distance between us to wrap my arms around him from behind. I press my cheek to his shoulder. Bailey stiffens, and I hold tight, refusing to let him throw our years of friendship away.
I’m proud of myself for taking the leap of faith by kissing him, even if it’s ended with me crashing and burning harder than I ever anticipated. I didn’t think I’d ever lose Bailey, but maybe I was wrong.
“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry I messed everything up.
I don’t know what to do, but I really miss you.
I wish there was something I could do to fix this, but I need you to tell me what.
” His hands land on mine, trying to pull me off him.
“ Please, B, ” I beg, feeling tears well up in my eyes as I fight to hold onto him like it’ll keep him from slipping through my fingers.
Except he’s not mine to hold onto, and once again, Bailey pushes me away.
I wish he’d look at me to see how badly I want to make this right. I want him to know that I still love him, because at this point, I don’t know how not to. It’s a part of me, even if I’m falling for Hunter.
Bailey keeps his head down, and without sparing me a single glance, he walks out of his room, taking a part of my soul with him.