46. Bailey
CHAPTER FORTY-SIX
Bailey
NOW
I’ve been trying to soak up all the time I can get with Javi before he moves in with Mirabelle and Henry, because I can’t imagine he’ll say no when they ask him.
I love Javi, but I think I like that he’s starting to grow without me. It won’t change the fact I’ll always be there for him.
There’s a ghost of a smile on my face as I think about Javi finding his place with them, but it fades entirely when I take in the sight of Luna sitting on the couch with my parents, and Kaitlyn frozen in place.
All their eyes turn to me, and without anyone saying anything, it’s obvious something bad happened. I just don’t know what or why Luna’s here.
“What’s going on?” I ask, trying to keep from jumping to conclusions.
“Your friend was at the gate, but we wanted to let you finish surfing,” Dad says, and I can see the questions hanging in the air. There’s no doubt who Luna looks like. She’s the spitting image of Kiera.
“Hey, B,” she says, trying to smile. It falls almost instantly, causing the hair on my arms to stand up. “I’m sorry to just show up. I-I thought I could get here to warn you before it aired. I swear, I didn’t know until this morning, but you didn’t answer any of my calls earlier.”
I’ve never known Luna to stumble over her words.
What would she need to warn me about?
“Um, shit. It’s probably still on the charger from this morning,” I say, assessing the situation as my parents stare at Luna. “Lu, what aired?”
I glance at Kaitlyn, and I wonder if I should’ve explained more about my friendship with Luna, but it’s too late now.
And then Luna moves so suddenly I don’t have time to process what’s happening until she’s throwing her arms tight around me in a hug.
“I’m sorry,” Luna whispers, and I don’t understand what she’s apologizing for. Why is she here? What could have possibly aired that warrants her showing up?
“Whatever it is, I’m sure it’s fine,” I say, but it’s more for my benefit than hers. “Just tell me what’s going on. I’m happy to see you, but you’re making it sound like the world is ending.”
I’m not used to her skirting around the truth. Lu’s always said what she’s thinking, regardless of who we were with. Would I prefer she’d be discreet about some things at the current moment—specifically about her mother, who she looks exactly like? Yes . But I’m not going to lie to anyone.
I’m keenly aware that everyone in the room is listening intently to our conversation.
She fidgets with her dark hair, looking away as she lowers her voice.
“I-I made a mistake. Carter, he, um, called me one night, and I had just gotten back from a frat party, so I was a little drunk. He asked how you were, and it was after you said he hadn’t reached out.
I was so mad at him and my mom that I exploded.
I never thought he’d tell her. I never thought she would do any of this, but I was wrong. I’m so fucking sorry, B. ”
“What did you do?” I ask, unable to hide the panic in my voice.
Luna’s eyes are shining with unshed tears. She’s the only one who knows everything .
“Bailey?” Kaitlyn gasps my name, only it’s in a way that scares the living shit out of me. I tear my eyes from Luna to look at her, noting the phone in her hand. “Is this true?” she asks and I take the phone, my eyes scanning over the screen as my stomach drops with every word I read.
Bailey Walker, youngest child of Thalia and Sebastian Walker, former quarterback for the Charlotte Blue Panthers, reportedly ran away from home after lighting his family’s house on fire almost three years ago.
This was previously unknown information, but it’s been heavily speculated upon with their son’s abrupt disappearance from the public eye.
The infamous arson case, which had remained unsolved, has now been explained by Kiera Davis, the ex-fiancée of Sebastian.
The end of their engagement was breaking news twenty-five years ago when Sebastian Walker left his pregnant fiancée to begin a relationship with his current wife, Thalia.
The couple now share four children together, most notably Mirabelle Walker, a decorated Olympian who is married to Henry Walker, the current quarterback of the Charlotte Blue Panthers.
Ms. Davis describes in detail in this record-breaking interview, how Bailey came to live with her family, believing her oldest child to be Sebastian’s from their failed engagement.
After discovering this wasn’t the case, he chose to be homeless instead of returning to his family’s home.
Ms. Davis explains how Bailey confided in her daughter that he would perform sexual acts in order to have somewhere to sleep at night. To find out more, plea ? —
“B, say something, please,” Luna begs, pulling my attention from the article. I can feel myself pulling away, dissociating to protect myself. It’s a handy trick once you learn how. Sometimes I don’t even know I’m doing it.
Dad puts his phone down, and I think I’m going to be sick. I never wanted them to know.
“We can file a suit, demanding they take it down because it’s not true.
We can sue Kiera for defamation. I can’t believe she would try to get back at me after all this time by going after you!
It makes me sick to see this shit said about you.
” Dad scoffs, quieting only when my mother rests a hand on his knee, her eyes locked on me.
“ Bash .”
It’s too much. I don’t—I can’t talk about this yet. I can’t look at them. “Bailey?” Kaitlyn prods, her fingers pulling the phone from my tightened grasp.
“I . . . I can’t—” I choke out, feeling caged in by the expecting eyes of everyone around me. They want me to deny it and tell them it’s lies.
How can I explain all of it’s true?
Is this what animals caged in the zoo feel like?
“ Bailey ,” Kait says. The change in her voice— the horror in it —telling me she knows why I can’t breathe. She doesn’t want to believe it. She’s going to hate me. I knew it.
It’s the horrible, ugly truth I’ve been hiding.
Luna’s presence here to explain her mom’s decisions is, in itself, proof that there’s a basis for what’s been said.
This isn’t how it was supposed to go.
They weren’t supposed to know.
But now that they do, it can’t be taken back.
I . . . I shouldn’t have come back.
“I’m so sorry,” Luna repeats, and I back away, my skin feeling like it’s crawling .
They’re never going to be able to look at me the same way again.
I drag my hands over my face, fighting the urge to run and never look back. I like to think I’ve grown as a person—that running isn’t my only resolution for everything, or lighting things on fire. I know I’ve moved past that for sure.
Or have I?
My internal scars and decisions just burned through the fragile relationships I’ve been painstakingly trying to rebuild with my family.
Mom moves toward me and I hold my breath, expecting her to tell me to get out.
I don’t know how she can even look at me.
I traded myself for somewhat safe places to sleep.
For showers and money to take care of myself.
I hit rock bottom until I reached out to Luna for help because I couldn’t do it anymore.
It was slowly killing me, and I was dead inside.
“I-I—” I stammer, refusing to meet her eyes. I think seeing the disappointment in them would be the final straw.
What I’m not expecting is for her arms to close around me instead of pushing me away. “?a va, mon fils. ?a va.” ? 1
All of the fight sinks out of me, and I fall apart against Mom, finally sharing my pain with her. She just holds me and doesn’t let go.
I couldn’t explain right away, but after I somewhat managed to pull myself together.
I slipped out of the room to gather my thoughts and take a shower, as if it would make it easier for me to share the fractured pieces of my soul with my family.
I still have no idea where to begin, but my skin is raw from how hard I scrubbed.
I can’t believe this happened.
Behind the safety of a closed door, with the shower still running despite my having already rinsed the ocean from my skin, I hit play on the interview Kiera gave. I need to know how specific she was so I know what I have to correct or elaborate on when I face everyone.
Kiera’s sitting on a couch with someone, twisting her hands in her lap. The host asks a few questions about her relationship with my dad, and Kiera explains how they met, the timeline of the relationship up until the proposal, then she falters.
“Thinking back, I was a naive fool. The answers were always right in front of me, but I stupidly believed Sebastian when he said Thalia was like his sister and they just didn’t get along.
I believed him. I had no reason not to. They couldn’t even make it through a meal at holidays when everyone got together without needing to be separated. ”
“How did they go from that to becoming a married couple?” the host questions, and Kiera’s smile is sad.
“I blame myself. I begged Sebastian to have Thalia as the photographer at our wedding. Despite everything, I admired her talent. She really has a gift for capturing the perfect moment and immortalizing it. Seb refused until he eventually gave in. I tried so hard to get her to like me, but I could never figure out what I had done to her. The truth was, I was engaged to the man she still loved. I learned about their history together, and how the ring Sebastian had given me was the same one he proposed to her with.”
This elicits a dramatic gasp, and I didn’t know this part, but I can only imagine she’s telling half the story. “You’re kidding. He was in what number season with the Blue Panthers making millions, and he recycled an engagement ring? ”
I forgot how good she is at twisting the truth to fit her narrative.