Chapter 13 - Tara
Jasper’s hot breath traces down the back of my neck, and I shiver as his lips find the tender spot behind my ear.
A moan rips out of me, raw and helpless.
I want to speak, to tell him what he’s doing to me, but words are too much—I can’t form them. All I can do is cling to his back, my nails pressing into him as though he’s the only thing keeping me grounded.
This is crazy.
This feels crazy.
I tip my head back, surrendering, the places where he kisses blazing beneath his mouth.
Every touch pulls me closer, dragging me deeper. I ache for him—inside me, surrounding me—closer than physically possible.
His fingers circle me with teasing precision, and I groan, my body tightening in response.
“You’re so fucking sexy,” he growls into my skin, his voice husky and desperate.
His pace quickens, the pleasure sharp and unbearable, building and building until I’m shaking with the need for release.
“I’m going to—” The words break, my mouth falling open as I cry out, wave after wave crashing over me.
My body shakes.
It’s like nothing I’ve felt before. I close my eyes tightly.
My body is dripping with pleasure as my moisture spreads over his two fingers still pressed against me.
My pussy convulses violently.
Holy crap.
I’m lost in the orgasm that washes over me, falling.
We hold each other as I come down.
The world around me begins to fade, I’m still catapulting through a reality that’s neither here nor anywhere I’ve been before.
I’m between worlds.
All I feel is pleasure and him.
I open my eyes, my mouth open, and trail my hand down to where I want him the most. I want to give him the pleasure he’s given me, but more.
I go to take his dick out of his pants, but he pulls away.
At first, I assume he’s repositioning, but he gets up and turns his big back to me.
I can’t see his face, but he looks tense.
What happened?
All of me still wants him, and it takes everything not to touch him.
The reality that I was in just before begins to fade away, though, and I’m reminded of who we both are.
Jasper is the Alpha who rejected me, the guy who thought he was too good to ever be with a human for real.
Yeah, maybe he wanted to touch me, but I’m clearly no way near good enough to touch him.
A darkness spreads through my chest.
Who was I kidding? He still doesn’t want me.
Just because we’ve been getting along doesn’t mean that we’re supposed to be together.
I move my hair out of my face and sit up. The moisture between my legs only makes me feel worse.
How could I have been so vulnerable like that again?
He still won’t look at me.
I take a deep breath.
“Um. So, I think I need to get to bed now, actually.”
He turns, his silver eyes emotionless. His mouth is stiff, his jaw clenched—if anything, he looks angry.
It’s confirmed. I’m being rejected again.
Why does it always come after so much pleasure?
“I’ll take you,” he says.
“No,” I dust myself off and look away. “I want to go alone.”
I head for the library door.
“Tara, wait.”
Now I feel the tears brimming behind my eyes, and there’s a bitter distaste in my chest.
I’m running now.
He could catch me if he wanted to, but why would he?
To humiliate me some more?
“I just need to go,” I whisper.
I run out into the darkness, and as my tears fall, I decide that all I need is to get away.
I don’t know where I’m going, it’s too dark, but I keep my legs moving and don’t look back.
***
Eventually, I have to stop.
The pain from running overpowers my sadness, and for a second, I don’t feel anything at all.
I’m numb.
The night around me is dark and silent; the only sounds are the crickets and the faint breeze of the wind. I could be anywhere. If I were a shifter, maybe I’d know exactly where I was.
Jasper.
Then I feel it again. The pain spreads through my chest, across every inch of my body.
I let myself cry. It’s embarrassing and stupid, but I can’t help it. If someone hears, then they hear, whatever. I need to cry.
Then I feel enraged.
How could I let this happen again?
I promised myself that I’d never, under any circumstances, let him treat me like this, let alone touch me again.
I’m weak. Susceptible to even the slightest bit of charm.
I wish I weren’t so weak!
I ball my fists, look around the pitch-black darkness for something to let my anger out on.
Of course, all I can make out are a couple of trees. Will have to do.
In a rage, I slam my foot against the base of the one closest by.
Fuck you, Jasper, you’ll never have me.
You sort of did just have me....
But never again.
Then I slam my fist, and for a second, it feels good until I feel pain.
The pain is light, but it’s enough for me to retract my hand and nurse it with the other.
Was that a good idea?
No.
Do I feel better?
Yes.
If only a little.
I turn around and stare out hopelessly into the night.
What the hell am I doing with my life?
I sigh, think about sitting down, and then notice something strange in the sky. It’s far away, but I can see it all right.
Something large and shadowy, a milky white. A cloud?
But it can’t be.
I squint my eyes to get a better look, but it’s blurry, still so far away.
I step forward, and beneath my feet a small twig snaps.
It pauses. Turns, and then its smoke-like body is heading my way.
What the hell is that?
It looks monstrous.
Panic rises in my chest, and I look for an escape but realize I have no idea where I am.
How did I get here again?
I freeze. With no idea where to go, I’ve somehow decided that I don’t know how to move.
I want to, but my body doesn’t budge.
The monster is here now, contorting and shifting with every second, its shadowy body like a mixture of flesh and smoke.
The thing is huge, all beast.
I step back a little.
Now I recognize what it is. The monsters that Jasper warned me about.
My heart is pumping out of my chest. The monster dips down low, headed for my face, and with nowhere to run, I stumble back.
My shoe catches onto something, and I fall to the forest floor.
It didn't expect me to go down, and so it glides above me, the floor offering a narrow escape.
I can hear my heartbeat in my ears. Adrenaline spurs me to go, but I know that if I run, it’ll chase me.
It’ll be behind me, I’ll be vulnerable.
No, I know what has to be done.
I need to fight.
The glow from its shadow illuminates some of the forest floor.
I slide my hand over a dark rock, and a deafening screech floods my eardrums as I grasp it in my palm.
It’s heading for me again. The screams get louder.
The smoke is just above my face.
Then with one swing, I hurl the stone. It goes through the smoke and punctures something more solid.
The beast screams.
This scream is different from the ones before.
Move Tara.
I get to my feet and start running. It’s only seconds before I feel a heavy weight slam into my back.
I fall. The ground scrapes my hands and face, and then, suddenly, I’m moving again. I’m being dragged.
My nails claw at the dirt, ripping up chunks of grass as I kick and thrash.
But the monster’s grip is strong.
Its claws are cold and formless, dragging me with a force that feels like I’m being pulled through outer space.
It turns me suddenly, my world flipped upside down as I scream.
I can’t even see its face, just a blur of shifting shadows through the darkness and those glowing red eyes.
It makes a sound that’s deafening.
“Let me go!” I yell, my voice cracked as I twist beneath its claws.
Its mouth is wide, jaws open as it goes for my neck.
I twist. Slamming my free foot forward, I hit something hard.
My vision is too blurred to understand what I hit, but it’s enough to make the creature hiss. It’s a horrible guttural sound.
I wince.
The creature’s grip loosens, and I rip my body free, scrambling forward in the dark.
Please, I’m not sure who or what I’m begging to, but there has to be something.
There’s no way I can get out of this on my own.
My chest burns, breath coming out at a pace way faster than my hands and knees can take me.
I glance over my shoulder at the monster shifting its form, the smoke knitting itself back together.
Its red eyes glower at me through the dark.
I don’t think I’ve witnessed anything more terrifying.
Hurriedly, I search for another rock.
It’s smaller this time, but it’s all I have—I hurl it at its head, but it ducks just in time, slithering toward me.
Then my vision turns white.
I feel its coldness wrap around me like an ice blanket. For a millisecond, I stare death in its glowing red eyes.
I’m prepared to be swallowed whole.
And then, a snarl rips through the night.
It’s not the monster’s.
This one is lower, deeper, one that makes the world vibrate around me.
I turn to my right and there, with its jaws sinking into the shadow monster’s side, is a big, grey wolf.
The shadow monster breaks free, lunging, sending the wolf chasing after it. I see the wolf’s eyes.
Jasper.
I get up, for some reason I have an instinct to help, but once Jasper growls, I take a step back.
This is the first time I’ve properly seen him in his wolf form; he’s formidable.
Jasper traps the monster once again, opening his jaws and sinking them into the side of the monster’s neck.
There’s that deafening scream.
But all I can focus on is Jasper. The way his pearly white canines glisten beneath the moonlight.
His fur is silky, smooth, looking like velvet or cream.
The shadow swirls around Jasper, its body like tentacles trying to pull him down with it.
But Jasper growls again, so loud that it’s as though the trees are going to come crashing down around me.
I hold onto my stomach.
Frightened more for Jasper than anything else. He has to make it out of this.
He’s strong.
Jasper presses his paws deeper into the creature’s body, pressing it down with all his weight.
It screams, a sound like a deflating balloon.
With the shadow monster helpless, Jasper sinks in his jaws again—this time the scream gets louder, so loud it’s as though something’s about to break.
It’s like glass shattering, so intense, I bring my hands to my ears.
Then it quietens.
It’s as though Jasper is feeding, opening his jaws and closing them around the monster’s neck. The rest of his wolf body is dead-still.
Now the smoke begins to dissipate, and the creature is shrinking.
I make the mistake of looking in its red eyes.
Even on the precipice of death, they’re cold and lifeless.
Then I feel something.
There’s a flash of white in front of me. I’m not sure what comes first, but quickly I fall to the floor.
It’s like ice is crawling through my veins.
I shudder, and then it’s gone.
The monster is gone too; beneath Jasper’s body, there’s nothing but a muddied forest floor.
Slowly, my breathing finds its way back to normal. The forest is silent.
It’s over.
Jasper remains still for a second before he transforms back into his human form.
I’m grateful to see something that I recognize. His back, that t-shirt, those black shorts.
Then he turns.
I gaze into his near-glowing eyes that are swept with concern.
“Tara—” he begins.
My vision goes black.
I feel the coldness again, and somehow, I know that it’s part of that thing.
Remnants of the creature are inside me.
It’s directing my vision, somehow, its darkness is leading me into a dark room.
I’m no longer in the forest, but somewhere else.
“Jasper?” I yell.
But I’m alone.
At the end of the room is something white. A piece of paper?
It gets closer and closer until I see what it is.
Darkness surrounds me, but I’m not afraid. I’m seeing something the creature doesn’t want me to see, somehow.
It’s a tapestry, blank at first, but then drops of ink begin to snake around its surface.
It’s forming a picture.
The ink spreads slowly, like veins searching for a heart.
Lines curl and spiral and then twist into shapes that seem familiar but don’t quite make a whole.
But then a circular outline takes form—a crown, delicate and curved, with each point rising like the tips of tiny spears.
As the image sharpens, I see what the crown is made of.
It’s not metal, or wood, or glass.
It’s feathers.
There’s a gust of wind, coming from nowhere, that scatters the feathers of the crown.
The image stays that way—moved.
Then the whole thing is presented to me.
A tapestry of a feather crown blowing in the wind.
But what does that mean?
I blink hard, but my body is starting to heat up. The shadow monster’s last essence is leaving me.
Before I can ask any questions, the darkness surges and pulls me back under.