Chapter 60
Chris
I get out of the car, my legs trembling. I’m holding a cake that I bought from the local bakery.
“You’re nervous,” Ryan says, falling into step by my side as we reach his parents’ front door.
“No, I’m not,” I lie.
“Yes, you are,” Evan cuts in.
“You shouldn’t be. You’ve already been here, they know you by now. What’s the problem?”
The problem is that we came here together. I got out of his car, he’s walking me up to the door, and my son is with us.
That’s the problem, you idiot.
“No problem.”
I definitely can’t tell him what’s going through my mind.
His mother opens the door, welcoming us with a broad smile.
“It’s so nice to see you again… All three of you,” she says suggestively, and as soon as I step inside, I feel my anxiety building.
I hug her and hand her the cake I bought.
“Oh, you didn’t have to,” she says.
“Mum never goes anywhere without taking something,” Evan replies for me. “Granny would kill her otherwise.”
My son always knows how to make me feel comfortable.
We head into the living room, where everyone’s sitting having a drink. I wave, as Evan hurriedly joins Nick and Ian, who are standing at the fireplace, deep in conversation.
Karen offers me a glass of wine that I accept, trying to mask my relief, and I sit down with Riley and Mr O’Connor. He seems in great form today.
I join in with their conversation until Mr O’Connor turns to me and asks how everything is going with the café.
“I’ve cleared up everything that got destroyed. We’ll be reopening in a few days.”
“So you sorted out the issues with the insurance?” he asks, interested.
“More or less,” I say, sighing.
I actually haven’t sorted out anything yet. I’m still waiting for the money back, and in the meantime I’m up to me eyeballs in debt just so that we can open up again. Hopefully I’ll be able to pay it all back soon, but I don’t want to worry everyone now by admitting all that.
We sit at the table. Evan sits down between Ryan and Mr O’Connor, and I sit opposite, next to Riley.
There’s always such a positive atmosphere in this house, despite all the bickering and silly arguments.
It’s something that makes you feel comfortable right away, that makes you feel at peace with the world.
It must have been really nice to grow up in a family like this.
Not that mine was bad, but the atmosphere at my parents’ house definitely wasn’t relaxing or fun like this one.
“Can you just stop it?” Ryan’s raised voice makes everyone suddenly silent.
“Here we go again…” says Ian, taking a sip of his water.
“I’m not doing anything, Ryan. Just try to relax,” Nick replies.
“Oh God, not again,” Riley says next to me, her hand against her forehead.
“Stop staring at her.”
“For fuck’s sake, Ryan. I wasn’t staring at her!”
“Yes, you were,” my son adds.
“See? He noticed, too!”
“It’s impossible not to, it’s like you have X-ray vision,” Evan comments. I’m utterly confused.
“Is that true, Nick?” their father interjects.
“I wasn’t… oh, fine. I just had a little glance at her tits, okay? How can I not? She’s sitting right in front of me and they’re leaning right over the table!”
It’s only then that I realise what they’re talking about.
Ryan jumps up, Nick doing the same.
“Outside, right now!” he threatens.
“Oh, great,” Ian says, getting up too. “A nice relaxed family dinner.”
All three of them storm outside, slamming the door behind them, as everyone tries to go back to eating as if nothing had happened.
Evan gets up. “I don’t want to miss this,” he says.
“Oh, kid, you’ll see a lot of this. Your father and uncles are all hotheads,” Mr O’Connor comments, cutting at his meat.
Your father? Your uncles?
Dear God, where am I?
Evan heads outside without even acknowledging what Mr O’Connor said, as I sit there, frozen, with no idea what to do.
Riley grabs my hand.
“Don’t worry, they won’t kill each other. Ian won’t let them.”
A few minutes later, the door clatters open. Nick is the first to come in. He sits back down as if nothing had happened. Ian and Ryan follow.
No one asks. No one speaks.
What kind of house have I ended up in?
Evan sits down next to Mr O’Connor and says, loudly: “I love this family.”
Mr O’Connor smiles, nodding.
“I’m happy to hear you say that, boy. Really happy.”
I head out into the back garden after dinner for a cigarette. The sky is clear, even though I can’t see any stars, and the moonlight lights up the lawn, making the outside lights completely useless. I like this neighbourhood. It’s peaceful: an ideal place to raise a family just like this one.
“There you are,” Ryan comes over and sits next to me on the bench.
“I just needed a minute.”
“I get it. We’re not exactly an easy family to be around.”
“No family is.”
“I imagine not. But we’re, you know…”
“Completely nuts?”
He gives me a small smile.
“What happened out here?”
“I don’t think you really want to know.”
“I do, though. And you’re going to tell me.”
“Or else?” he asks, raising an eyebrow.
I look at him suggestively and he shakes his head.
“I didn’t like the way he was looking at you.”
“Nick? Is that who you’re talking about?”
“He was staring at you.”
“Okay…”
“I don’t want him to.”
“But he’s your brother…”
“There’s a lot of history between me and Nick. And I’m trying to stop that history from repeating itself.”
“And you don’t want to talk about it?”
He sighs. “I don’t know… I don’t want you to change your opinion of me.”
“Ryan,” I say, taking his face and making him look at me. “I already know what I think of you. Knowing something about your past isn’t going to change anything. I see you for who you are now, with me.”
He smiles at me, before bringing his lips to mine. He brushes them gently, before saying: “Let’s go home.”
“But we haven’t had dessert yet.”
“There’s a much nicer dessert at home, and I don’t want to share it with anyone. You know what my appetite’s like.”
I smile, trying to ignore the flush of heat blazing through my body.
“You might get indigestion.”
“I’ll take that risk.”