Chapter 15 Pushing Buttons Pays Off
Pushing Buttons Pays Off
BILLIE
I don’t hesitate even though my mind races.
Why now? What’s changed? Will Colt ever forgive us? How is this already so effing good, and I haven’t even touched Ryder yet?
My hand trembles as I put it on Ryder’s shoulder. He helps me climb onto his lap so that my bad arm doesn’t get caught between us, my legs straddling his hips. His big hands find my waist, and then we’re face-to-face, the low rumble of the engine the only sound between us.
“Since when do you like trouble?” I’m panting. I love the feel of him between my legs like this.
His hands knead my sides, thumbs moving north toward my breasts, and a bolt of need cracks through my center. “Since I started hanging out with you. Such. A fucking. Brat.”
And then he tilts his head and leans in and slants his mouth over mine.
The heat of him—his lips, his breath, his body—is shocking in the best, most arousing way. I moan, overwhelmed, when he brushes his nose against mine and notches his bottom lip between my own.
He drags his tongue over the seam of my mouth, opening me to him, and my clit screams when I let him in and he drinks deeply, his tongue gliding into my mouth with an ease—a confidence—that has me moaning again.
“A brat you like.”
“A brat I can’t stay away from. So yeah.”
The kiss is his—I’m his—and I let him take the lead.
He tastes clean, like toothpaste, and I imagine he was getting ready for bed when I shamelessly sent him that text.
The kiss guides us in a rhythm that quickly becomes frantic, needy.
His thumbs brush lightly over my nipples, and I bite down on his bottom lip hard, spreading my knees so I can press my center more firmly against his.
He grunts. His hands find my hips, and he presses me down even more. At the same time, he rocks his hips upward, and my eyes roll to the back of my head when I feel his erection nudge me where I want him most.
This already feels so, so good.
Ordinarily, I’d let a guy stay in the lead at this point. As a woman, you never want to come across as too eager, too bossy in these situations. Guys like to think they’re in control.
Fuck that. I’ve wanted this man for practically my whole life. I’m done playing it safe. Done playing games.
I’ve never liked doing what I was supposed to do anyway.
Grabbing the hem of my shirt, I break the kiss to yank it over my head and toss it aside.
Ryder makes a sound, half pleasure, half pain, as he looks down at my tits. My flimsy bra is red lace with little rosettes dotting the top of the cups. It’s sheer enough that you can see my nipples in the light of the dash.
“Jesus Christ.” Pressing a quick kiss to my throat, Ryder ducks his head to kiss the tops of my breasts, working his way down to my nipples. “You’re so fuckin’ beautiful, Billie. You got no idea how much I’ve been dyin’ to do this. Since the rodeo…I been dyin’.”
My heart hiccups. I don’t want to think too much about what that means, but…
Yeah, the idea that he’s wanted me since that night makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside. He doesn’t want to be just friends. Which makes me think he turned me down because he’s trying not to hurt anyone, not because he doesn’t want me.
When he sucks my left nipple into his mouth, I nearly howl at the painful twist of lust that reverberates through my center. I knock off his hat and jam my fingers into his hair, giving it a tug that’s not at all gentle.
“Aw, darlin’. You ain’t afraid to tell me what you like.
Keep doing that, yeah? Tell me everything.
I wanna know everything.” Ryder takes my nipple between his teeth.
At the same time, he reaches around and unhooks my bra.
His fingers guide the straps down my arms, goose bumps breaking out on my skin when the crisp October air hits my bare breasts.
I feel exposed.
I feel sexy.
He wants to know me. Everything about me.
I take his hand and put it on my breast. “Lemme teach you, then.”
His throat works on a swallow. His eyes are hazy, unfocused. I guide our thumbs over my nipple, my head falling back at the pure ecstasy of how good his calloused hands feel on me.
“Aw, baby.” He pushes my hair over my shoulder before reaching around to gather it in his fingers, wrapping the strands around his fist. He pulls, tilting my head back so that my neck is bared and my tits are thrust practically into his face.
“I want to see all of you. You’re so—fuck, darlin’. Just…fuck.”
“Exactly the reaction I was going for.”
“So you finally admit it.” He leans in and sinks his teeth into my neck. “You been fuckin’ with me.”
“That’s”—I hiss when he pinches my nipple—“kind of my MO tonight. Fucking with men I apparently can’t have.”
He trails his mouth over my collarbone before sucking my other nipple into his mouth. “But you have me.”
Only for tonight, though, right? Because this can’t happen.
I don’t say the words out loud. I don’t think I need to. Sure, Ryder wants me. But like I said, he also doesn’t want to fuck up his friendship with Colt or cause any stupid drama between us or our families.
I get it, even if I want more than just a single night with him. I’ll take what I can get. Maybe hooking up with him will finally get him out of my system.
Ha. You’re delusional.
I guide his hand down my stomach. “I do. You’re all mine, cowboy.”
He gives my hair another pull. This one isn’t as gentle, and I feel it everywhere—the tips of my breasts, my clit, the fronts of my thighs.
Yum.
“All yours.” Our tangled fingers find the button of my skirt. But instead of working it through its hole, he reaches down and shoves up the denim. He puts his hand on my thigh and arcs his thumb closer, closer, closer to where I want him most.
He bites down on my nipple hard, and I cry out. At the same time, he presses his thumb against my panties. “Show me how much you like havin’ me. Get on your knees, darlin’.”
When guys call me darlin’, it usually makes me cringe. There’s something cheesy about the endearment. Maybe because men use it so damn much around here that it doesn’t sound endearing at all? It just comes off as a lazy attempt at getting laid.
When Ryder says it, though, my toes literally curl. I love it.
I’ve never, ever heard him use it with another woman.
Pushing into the hand I have on his shoulder, I do as he tells me and rise onto my knees. He uses both hands to push up my skirt even more.
Then he’s looking me in the eye. Leaning in for a bruising kiss before curling his first finger through my thong. He begins to trail his finger back and forth, back and forth, his knuckle tracing a line of fire through my slit.
His turn to bite my bottom lip. “Soft. Don’t tell me you—”
“Shaved for Xander? Nah.” I roll my hips into his touch. “I shaved for you. On the off chance—”
“I ended up fucking you in the front seat of my truck?” He tugs my thong aside.
“You really gonna fuck me for the first time in the front seat of your car?”
His thumb grazes my clit as he lets out a dark chuckle. “Where else you want me to do it?”
Lust, liquid, white-hot, bolts through my center. “On the hood. In the bed. In the backseat too.”
The side of his mouth quirks up. “But we gotta be gentle. You’re hurt.”
“You be gentle, I’m gonna scream.”
“That’s kind of the idea, makin’ you scream. But only because you feel so good.” He parts me with his fingers, then glides one through my slickness. “Aw, darlin’. I like this. So fucking much.”
“Show me.” I’m practically riding his hand at this point. “Show me how much you like it.”
He gathers my arousal on his fingertips and uses it to coat my clit. He goes slowly, savoring me, circling my clit again and again. I press against his fingers, begging for more. In reply, he slips those fingers lower and notches them at my entrance.
Pressure. Already.
More.
Leaning in, I kiss his mouth. His tongue glides to meet mine, and he mimics the motion with his finger. Its wide, blunt tip nudges my cunt before slipping inside.
We both shudder. There’s an unexpected catch in my chest.
He’s into this. Into me. And that makes me think…
What?
That we have a chance in hell of being together?
I don’t know what this means, what he means when he says he can’t stay away, but I do know I couldn’t ask him to stop if you paid me.
I do know I feel safe, accepted in a way I never have before with a guy. The stakes are so, so high. But weirdly enough, I also feel like I have nothing to lose.
We’re both adults. If this really is a onetime thing we never talk about again, so be it. I can let loose without worrying about whether or not he’ll come back for seconds.
Might as well enjoy myself, then.
Might as well make the most of this marvelously unexpected moment, the one where I’m in Ryder’s truck, in his arms, his hands all over me.
I am in heaven as he fills me with his finger. He presses the heel of his hand to my clit the deeper he sinks inside me. My cunt flutters around him, my legs beginning to shake, and his other hand moves to my breast and plays with my nipple.
Just like I taught him. The thought that he’s paying attention, that he’s trying to learn my body, my likes, makes my heart swell.
“Ry,” I whisper into his mouth, rocking my hips. “More. Give me…everything.”
He kisses me, his scruff catching on my chin, my cheeks. “You’re so little here, Billie. If you really want to—”
“I want to.”
“I’m gonna get you a little more relaxed, yeah?” I feel his second fingertip nudging against me. “It’ll feel like a lot at first, but I promise I’ll make it feel good. Trust me to make you feel good? Please?”
I cup the back of his neck and pull him in for a deeper kiss. “Always. You always make me feel good.”
His hand falls from my hair and finds my hip. He holds me steady as he smoothly thrusts his first finger in, then out. He grunts when I try to rock my hips again.
“I know it’s in your nature to ride, but you gotta be patient, yeah? I don’t want you hurtin’ something else. The arm is enough.”