Chapter 18 New Faces
New Faces
BILLIE
Wheeler is Having a Baby!
Brunch, Margaritas, and Baby Surprises Will Be Served
Hosted by Mollie, Sally, and Ava
Please RSVP by October 22
“Aw.”
Mom looks up from the laundry she’s folding. “What’s that?”
“Wheeler Rankin invited me to her baby shower. You know, Duke’s—”
“Girlfriend. Yes! Oh, how wonderful. I’m so happy for them.” Mom tilts her head. “And I’m happy for you that you’re making new friends. I like those girls.”
“I do too.” I slip the invitation back into its envelope.
Even though I moved into my place years ago, my mail still gets delivered to Mom and Dad’s house.
Everybody’s does. It would take the postman literally all day to deliver mail across the ranch, so my parents simplified things and have everyone’s stuff get delivered here.
I usually stop by after work to pick up my mail, which these days is mostly bills and, randomly enough, fliers for cheap land in Tennessee of all places.
“How’s Ryder?” Mom shakes out one of Dad’s shirts. “I still think about the way that man leapt for you when you fell off that horse. I thought he was gonna break a dang arm too!”
My stomach flips for the hundred thousandth time this week. It happens anytime I so much as think his name.
I glance at my phone, which I set beside me on the kitchen table.
No texts or calls since I checked it last, a minute ago.
Nevertheless, a flash of heat low in my belly lets me know I am definitely not over the sex Ryder and I had last weekend. It’s only been four days since we hooked up, but you’d think I’d spent forty days and forty nights in the desert for how much I miss him.
How much I wanna call him and have phone sex with him, and then invite him over for actual, physical sex.
I got you, baby, I’d tell him.
He’d call me darlin’, and then he’d kiss the shit out of me while tearing off all my clothes.
I know thinking about Ryder is an exercise in self-flagellation. Yeah, we had life-altering sex after having several life-altering conversations. Sure, he was the first to get to me after I fell off my horse and literally saved my life. Yes, I’m the only one he’ll play his guitar for.
But none of that means a damn thing if he doesn’t ask me out. Which he hasn’t even though we did text a lot over the weekend. I haven’t heard from him since Sunday.
I’ve learned that guys are funny like that. You can have the best time ever with them—you can get deep, talk about intimate shit—and think your connection is real and special. But then they ghost you for no discernible reason other than they can.
I’m intense. I own that. I just wonder, how many times do I need to learn that other people don’t read as much into things as I do? That they don’t take things as seriously?
Because I took my hookup with Ryder pretty fucking seriously. And now here I am, checking my phone every five seconds just to make sure I didn’t miss his text.
Honestly, Mom, I have no idea how Ryder is. I just know I wanna see him again. Preferably naked.
“Ryder is good.” I choose my words carefully, not wanting to give myself away. “Busy. But otherwise good. He’s excited for the babies.”
“That man is so good with kids. Dean is obsessed with him. I’ll never forget the way he showed up for Colt after Abby passed. I’m not sure what we would’ve done without him.”
Knife to the chest.
That’s how Mom’s seemingly innocuous comment feels right now.
Trust me, existing without Ryder in my life right now is killing me, just like the things you’re saying.
I stick my hand inside the laundry basket in an effort to distract myself from the vortex of shame and need and confusion swirling inside my gut.
Of course the item of clothing I pluck from the pile is some of Dad’s underwear.
Dropping it, I grab some socks instead. “Why are you still doing Dad’s laundry? I know he has time now.” My brothers are the ones working long hours these days. Dad’s not retired, but he’s keeping a regular seven-to-four schedule along with me.
“Because, honey, I like taking care of him. That’s how marriage works.”
“Has he ever done your laundry?”
Mom nods. “He did. Who do you think took care of me when I had six babies?”
“Grandma.”
“She helped too, of course,” Mom says with a chuckle. “But your dad stepped up in a big way. You’ll see when you get married.”
Ugh, Mom and the zingers today.
Maybe I’m just extra sensitive to it right now because I’m PMSing. Or maybe I just need to accept the fact that Ryder wasn’t joking when he said, Don’t fall in love with me.
“You all right, honey?”
I realize Mom is looking at me, her face etched with concern. “Yeah. Sorry. Spacing out here. I’m pooped.”
“Dad says the office has been quiet.” Her frown stays put. “I know you’re still probably shaken up from your injury, but the sooner you get your head back into work, the easier it’ll be.”
“Did you like your job?”
“What? Being a mom to y’all?” Mom smiles, smoothing her hands over the shirt she just folded.
“It wasn’t easy. But it was right for our family, and right for me too.
I loved raising you kids. Some of our happiest times were when y’all were little.
Life was chaos, and we were just surviving a lot of the time.
But there was a clarity of purpose that I miss, because that job—it does end.
Not being a parent, but having kids at home. ”
My chest twists. Leave it to Mom to unexpectedly relate to my occupational angst.
“Knock knock!”
Glancing over my shoulder, I see Dad stride into the kitchen. I do a double take when a woman walks in behind him.
She’s cute, probably around my age, with brown hair and a big smile.
“Y’all, I’d like to introduce you to Lainey Brown.” Dad nods at our visitor. “She’s the daughter of a friend, and she’s in town from Austin, where she just graduated business school.”
Lainey smiles and crosses the kitchen, holding out her hand. “Nice to meet y’all. Dale told me so much about his family that I already feel like I know you. He’s so proud of y’all.”
I shake her hand. “He should be. We’re awesome.”
“You must be Billie.” Lainey smiles. “You’re a barrel racer, right?”
“She was a barrel racer,” Mom corrects. “But she’s always been our A-plus accountant. She even got her degree in math.”
“Oh?” Lainey tilts her head. “Where’d you go to school?”
“I got my associate’s degree online so I wouldn’t have to leave the ranch.”
“Girl, I get it. I wouldn’t want to leave this slice of heaven either. Your family’s property is stunning. It’s truly an honor to help y’all with some updates. I already have so many ideas!”
I raise my brows and look at Dad. “Updates?”
“I had lunch with Lainey’s father in Fort Worth earlier this year.” Dad rocks back on his heels as he slips his hands in the front pockets of his jeans. “You know, when I was there for the rodeo? Anyway, we got to talking, and he mentioned Lainey was a branding whiz.”
Mom frowns. “Not branding as in—”
“I don’t work with cattle, if that’s what you’re asking,” Lainey replies with a laugh. “I help businesses brand themselves so they’re more recognizable to the public. I’m here to give y’all a whole new look—new logo, new website, new tagline. The whole shebang.”
“I had no idea that job existed. How cool.” I mean that. I love living in Hartsville, but there’s not a lot of variety around here when it comes to professions. Sometimes it feels like everyone on earth is either a rancher, a cowboy, or a cook.
“It took me a long time to land on this as a profession,” Lainey continues. “But I love it. The creativity aspect is really what drew me to the field, and I started taking on projects while I was still in business school.”
My heart thumps. “I’m amazed. Welcome to the ranch, Lainey. I look forward to working with you.”
“I don’t want to count our chickens before they’re hatched, but I think giving your ranch a few key updates in terms of your marketing and the look you’re going for will really push your numbers in the right direction. Sky’s the limit.”
“I’m so on board.” I glance at my father. “I’m kinda surprised you signed up for this, though.”
He shrugs. “I’m not gonna be around forever, Billie. I wanna make sure I leave y’all an operation that’s in tip-top shape. I know y’all work hard to make our little world go round, and I have every intention of honoring that.”
Mom and I chat with Lainey for a while. Apparently Dad offered her housing on the ranch while she’s working here. She’ll be starting sooner rather than later, although she and Dad are still ironing out the details.
Later, I head out to the barn, where I know I’ll find Tate. He’s brushing down a gorgeous Andalusian that we named Dwayne after The Rock, AKA Dwayne Johnson, because the horse is fifteen hands high and an absolute giant.
“If I tell you something juicy, will you tack up a horse and come for a ride with me?” I ask Tate.
My brother cuts me a look. “You know it’d be just our luck that you’d fall off again, and this time, you’ll mangle your arm so badly they’re going to have to amputate it. I know you can take on the world with just one arm, but do you want to?”
I laugh. “I’m not gonna fall again. Law of averages.”
“Explain that law to me.”
“The average chance of falling off a horse is, like, two percent, and since I just fell off on my last ride, I have ninety-eight thousand more rides until I fall again.”
He shakes his head, a big old smile on his face. “That makes zero sense.”
“Please, Tate. I’m losing my mind, and I really need a friend to talk to right now. And I’m not even wearing the sling anymore. I promise, my arm is fine.”
His smile fades. “Everything okay?”
Yes. No. I don’t know.
I look at him. He looks back.
At last he sighs. “Fine. But if anyone finds out, I’m saying this was your idea.”
A rush of relief leaves me feeling woozy. “Thank you.”