Chapter 22 Wake-Up Call
Wake-Up Call
BILLIE
I’m yanked from sleep by the sound of an unfamiliar alarm.
Seriously? It can’t be time to get up already.
Because that would mean it’s time for me to leave Ryder’s surprisingly comfortable—if somewhat small—bed.
That would mean it’s time to go home. Face the music.
Face the choices I’ve made. The changes I need to make. Although I didn’t have any nightmares last night. That seems noteworthy, considering I’ve had them more often than not these past few weeks.
The deep rumble of a masculine growl draws my nipples to tight, aching points.
“Fuck.” The deep, scraped-bare sound of Ryder’s voice in the morning—it’s everything.
“I know.”
“Too early.”
“I know.”
“Didn’t we just fall asleep?”
“Yes. I think so. We—so many times I—”
“Lost count?”
“Yes.”
I only remember I’m naked when Ryder’s hand moves lazily down my bare belly. I’m a back sleeper, and he’s on his side.
His stubble scrapes my shoulder as he kisses me there.
“Mornin’, beautiful.”
I bite my lip. This is so good so soon. It’s scary.
“Morning, handsome.”
His hand moves lower. I moan when his fingers part me, slipping gently inside my slickness. Who knew you could wake up soaking wet?
He growls again. “Fuck.”
“I know.”
“You sore?”
“Yes.”
“Good.”
“Again. Can we? Please?”
It’s pitch dark in the room, which means it’s pitch dark outside. No surprise there. Ryder set his alarm for three a.m.
“I don’t want you hurtin’.” He runs the pads of his fingers over my clit. “How about I make you come like this? Will that suffice?”
“No.”
He chuckles. “I’ll be gentle, then.”
Ryder rolls on top of me, using his knee to nudge my legs apart. He kisses my collarbone. My neck. He carefully bends my leg and presses my knee to my chest.
His leaking head meets with my leg as he ducks to kiss my nipples. They tingle, and I gasp.
Beard burn. I bet if I looked, my skin would be red. Chapped.
Sensation bolts through my center to land in my clit.
Ryder goes still. “Too much?”
I run my hands down his back, wrapping my leg around his hip. “No. More.”
“Yes, ma’am.”
I feel tender and raw and achy everywhere.
More, please.
We both moan when he pushes inside me. I’m sore to the point of pain. I’ve never had sex that many times in one night. Not even close.
To be honest, I didn’t think it was possible. But no joke, Ryder and I fucked five times since we got into bed after dinner.
Five.
Now we’re going for round six. Even though I’m exhausted and scared and in pain, I couldn’t stop if you paid me.
Ryder sinks into me slowly. All the while drawing lazy circles on my clit with his fingers. His mouth is on my tits. My neck.
I make an embarrassingly high-pitched sound when he starts to thrust. At the same time, my cunt spasms around his length.
“Already close, huh?” He’s chuckling again.
I nod, lost in the mindfuck of being filled by this man in every sense of the word but not being able to see any part of him.
He rests his forehead on mine. It’s damp with sweat, and now it’s my heart that spasms. It’s taking real effort on his part to hold back. Go slow. Be gentle. He fucked me hard and fast last night, over and over again, his strokes punishing, his body taut with tension and the need to rut.
But this? This is something else entirely. It’s not fucking. Not even sex.
This is being loved. Tended to.
He patiently brings me to orgasm, his thrusts luxuriously slow, his fingers gentle. I surrender to the release, unable to do anything except whisper his name as I hang onto his neck for dear life.
“You’re perfect,” he whispers back, lowering his weight onto mine so I’m pinned to the mattress. “You’re everything. I wanna make you mine like this every morning, yeah?”
Coming down from the high of my orgasm, I feel like I’m floating in a warm, calm ocean. He comes inside me with a grunt, going still. The first time he did it, he asked before it happened. Baby, I really wanna come inside you, but you gotta tell me it’s okay, yeah?
I said okay that time, and the time after that too. He got the picture then.
Is it wrong that I like the sensation of being filled by him this way? I already feel his cum leaking out between our bodies. There’s always so much of it.
Jesus, am I really fantasizing about Ryder getting me pregnant? The idea makes my cunt flutter.
He stays on top of me for a minute, breathing hard.
“I don’t wanna take you home.” His lips brush mine. “Can I just keep you in my bed all day?”
I laugh, running my fingertips over his back the way he likes. “We’re only two days away from the weekend.”
“I can’t wait that long. Can you?”
“No.”
A ripping sensation in my chest has me closing my eyes. “We have to talk to Colt.”
“I know. You still think your mama and daddy are gonna let you spend the night, even if they know my intentions are good? I know they’re…uh, let’s call it ‘traditionally minded.’”
“I’ve lived on my own for years now, Ry. Where I sleep is my business.”
It’s his turn to laugh. “If you say so. All right, baby. Much as I hate to say it, I gotta get moving.”
He kisses my forehead, and I swear to God my internal organs—the important ones, anyway—melt.
Could this be the way I start the morning…every morning?
On the drive back to my place, I allow myself to picture what my life could look like in a year if I’m brave and make good choices and encounter a little luck.
I could be living with Ryder. Or he could be living with me. Honestly I don’t care as long as he makes love to me every morning.
Instead of dreading a day spent doing taxes, I could be looking forward to a day spent working with horses, kids, therapists, the community. I’d be making a real impact.
I’d be outside in this glorious fall weather. I wonder what role I’d have in the therapy program. Coordinator? Community outreach…person? Liaison, maybe?
I’m exhausted after a night of interrupted sleep and intense athletic activity, but you wouldn’t know it from the way my skeleton vibrates with energy.
This idea is lighting me up, and that means something.
It’s not the giant neon sign I was hoping would appear to point me in the right direction. But it’s a definite nudge.
Maybe the rest is not up to the universe but up to me.
Dad always says that action is the best medicine.
Once we’re on my family’s property, I have Ryder take the back way to my house. It’s a dirt road that barely merits the name, and we bounce around hard enough that my head hurts by the time we pull up to my front door.
Grabbing the door handle, I lean over the seat to peck Ryder on the mouth. “I’ll talk to Colt earliest chance I get.”
“Fill me in when you do?” Ryder’s eyes are full in the semidarkness. “I’m not opposed to us talking to him together. I think the sooner we rip off the Band-Aid, the better.”
I nod. “I don’t disagree. Let’s see where the wind takes us, okay?”
“Okay.” He’s kissing me again, groaning when he moves to my neck. “You taste so fuckin’ good, baby. Tonight—”
“Yeah.” I’m trying not to pant. If we get worked up again, there’s no telling what will happen. “We’ll figure something out.”
“Good. And unless you want me to put a baby in you, don’t forget to take your birth control.”
A burst of…something moves through me. Wait, is Ryder thinking about making some babies too?
“I have an IUD, remember?” I reply carefully.
“Ah.” He nips at the hollow underneath my jaw. “Right.”
“But…do you want to put a baby in me?”
What a totally inappropriate question to ask. I flush with embarrassment, even as my body pounds with yearning.
I want—need—to know his answer.
He pulls away, nostrils flaring as he locks eyes with me. “All we been through, and you’re still pushin’ my goddamn buttons, huh?”
“You’d better get used to it.” I tuck a stray strand of hair behind his ear.
His eyes are still on mine when he says, “Yeah, Billie. One day I’d love to make some babies with you. I got work to do—a lot of work—in the meantime. We have the work we’re gonna do together now too.”
I smile, a cloudless sky opening up inside my chest. “We do.”
“But does the idea of you havin’ our baby get me goin’? Yeah, darlin’, it does.”
Whew.
“That’s…a lot.” My hand shakes as I continue to curl the hair around his ear.
Laughter rumbles inside his chest. “You asked.”
“You answered. Thank you.”
“Thank you. For last night. For everything else too.”
My lips twitch. “You’re welcome.”
“Such a brat,” he says with a shake of his head.
“Have a good day?”
His eyes search mine. “I’ll try. You’d best answer when I call you, you hear me?”
I smile as I press one last kiss to his lips. “I promise.”
I’ve been to exactly one baby shower in my life: It was the shower my mom threw for Abby when she was having Dean. I remember it being…tame at best.
If I’m being completely honest, it was boring as hell.
Mom didn’t let me partake in the mimosa bar Abby’s friends set up at my parents’ house, where the shower was hosted.
So basically I just sat there stone-cold sober and watched Abby open a bunch of presents I didn’t find particularly exciting.
I remember having to try very hard not to roll my eyes when she opened a car seat and everyone oohed and aaahed over the fact that it matched the stroller she’d opened a few gifts prior.
Needless to say, while I’m always excited to hang out with the Lucky River Ranch girls, I’m not sure what to expect when it comes to the baby shower part.
Turns out I shouldn’t have worried. The second I step into the New House’s beautifully decorated living room, I already know the vibe is totally different from the saccharine sweetness of my sister-in-law’s gathering.
Could these girls be my new sisters-in-law one day? Abby and I were never close, so it’s a refreshing change of pace to be welcomed with genuine enthusiasm by Sally, who pulls me in for a tight hug while her mom, Patsy, offers me a frosty margarita, complete with Tajin rim.
“Y’all are my people,” I say with a laugh.
Patsy smiles. “Cheers, honey.”