Chapter 7
Chapter
Seven
Kannon
I woke up reaching for her. The dip in the bed where she should have been was empty. Before I considered that she might be in the bathroom or up making breakfast, I found a piece of paper, a note. My heart sank before I could even read the words. I knew she was gone. I couldn’t feel her.
I blinked a few times, trying to adjust my eyes to the unfamiliar sting and the dim morning lighting of my bedroom. I couldn’t bring myself to read Carteay’s note at first. Instead, I threw the paper down and jumped out of bed.
The kitchen was empty, and I knew the guest room would be too.
I was surprised to find her things still there.
Still, I knew better than to hope. Back in my room, I stared at that crumpled sheet of paper, willing the words to say something other than goodbye.
It pissed me off that my hands shook as I picked it up.
Kannon,
First of all, I need you to know that I’m not running from you, from us. I want us more than anything, but it’s selfish to think that I can just be with you and ride off into the sunset without any consequences. My consequences aren’t for you to face.
Thank you for everything. Thank you for giving me time to breathe, but I need to keep you breathing too.
I’ll miss you, my love, but I rather miss you than to bury you.
Please don’t come for me. Protect yourself like you protect everyone else.
I’ll be fine. You kept me safe. Let me do the same for you. Let me fix this.
Mercy.
Carrie
I read the note twice then a third time just to punish myself for having feelings. What the hell did she mean, let her do the same for me?
Turning around, I snatched my phone from the nightstand, then I remembered she didn’t have a damn phone right now. I dashed out of my bedroom, unsure of where I was headed first. Where the hell was she? How long had she been gone?
Please don’t come for me.
Those five words reverberated in my head like a pinball.
Mercy. She’d safe worded. I knew the rules, but I didn’t give a fuck about rules right now.
Fuck! I knew I needed to respect her wishes, but at what cost?
Who was to say that she really knew what was best for her?
It was my job to protect her. I couldn’t move without knowing the facts though.
I had to make some calls. At the same time, I didn’t know who I could trust yet.
I needed to know who was who. I needed her help to get her out of that shit.
What if she doesn’t want to be saved? I was annoyed at my own logic, but that didn’t mean it wasn’t right. What if Carteay really meant what she said? What if all this was to her was a hiatus from her fast-paced life? I plopped down on my couch and buried my face in my hands as reality set in.
What they said must have been true. Everybody didn’t get to have a happily ever after.