Chapter 23
LAWSON
Carlie swings around on Reed’s arm, the soft twang of country music floating around us. And I sit, rooted to my seat and whiskey tumbler in hand, as tension builds in my chest. Growing with every song she dances without me.
Reed leans in to say something. The music drowns out his words as I watch his lips move before cracking into a grin. Carlie tosses her head back with a laugh that would smash through the stars, seeing them fizzle and plummet to the ground.
The telltale heat of jealousy winds its way through my veins.
I throw back the last mouthful, and it burns.
Like it goddamn should.
Jealous of my little brother. Loser territory, if it ever existed, and I’m the fucking king.
The song dies out, and something slower starts up. From across the table, I see Ruby wink at her husband as she sips her merlot.
I have no idea what’s gotten into me when I stand and stalk to the other side of the table by Ruby’s side.
She looks up, taking another sip. “Laws?”
“We’re dancin’.”
“Oh, I would love to, but my feet are killing me.” The smile on her face paired with the mock-innocent look tells me she’s full of shit. “Send my husband back to me when you’re ready, hey.”
These two totally set me up.
Dammit.
I lean over and swipe my hat from the table and push it onto my head before I close in on Reed and the woman who oughta be in my arms right now. Not his.
“Cuttin’ in, bud.” I wave a hand between them.
Reed reaffirms his hold on Carlie. “Yeah, we’re not done, bud.”
Carlie tries and fails to tamp down a grin as Reed whisks her away from me.
Like fuck, little bro.
As he makes the mistake of spinning her around with one hand, I step in and slide my arm around her waist, pulling her to me.
I’m a damn Neanderthal. It’s not my best moment, I’m aware. But the heat washing its way through every inch of my body at watching her happy in some other man’s arms is suffocating me.
Even if it is my brother’s.
I pull her closer, dropping my face into her hair as we take up the rhythm of the song. Her hands move, one sliding across the back of my neck, the other pressing into my chest over my heart.
The first useful lungful floods in.
“Lawson?” she whispers.
“Yeah?”
“Thank you for bringing me with you.”
“My pleasure, Princess.”
We sway our way through the song that will always be my favorite from this single second on. I lift my head and meet her gaze. Silver lines it.
“You okay?” I rasp.
She scrunches up her face and nods. “I’m great.”
Rubes drifts past, closing in on Reed on the other side of the dance floor.
So much for sore feet. Somebody bumps into my shoulder, and I turn to find Mack and Gracie, my brother wrapped around his wife from behind as they shimmy across the dance floor.
Gracie’s belly leads the way as Mack dips his head to her ear, and she smiles and rolls her head back, planting a kiss on his cheek.
Hudson sits at the head of the table, Addy on his lap, her arms around his neck as they watch their daughter, Hattie, wander around, collecting flowers from everyone’s table.
Fuck, the love and adoration are everywhere. This family of mine is pure heart and soul.
“Now I understand.” Carlie’s hand slips from my chest to my jaw as she holds my gaze.
“What do you understand?” I ask.
“Why you’re such a nice guy.” Her attention wanders around the room, landing on my brothers and their wives, finally resting on my parents who sit at the table, Ma tucked into Harry’s side. The old man’s eyes are closed, whiskey in hand, as he sways his head to the song. “You’re so lucky, Lawson.”
“Yeah, I am,” I rasp.
Christ, what I wouldn’t give to have what the rest of my family has found.
Carlie yawns, her hand pressing over her mouth.
“Bedtime,” I whisper into her ear.
“No, Grace isn’t leaving. So I’m staying. Even Hattie’s still up. I don’t want to be the one to not keep up.”
I chuckle. “It’s not a competition, Carlie.”
“I know, but it would be rude to leave so soon.”
As if on cue, Reed and Rubes waltz their way over. “Bedtime, Laws.” Reed wriggles his eyebrows at me like an absolute idiot.
“Thank you so much for bringing our favorite brother home to us, Carlie.” Ruby leans in for a hug, and I release the woman in my arms so she can hug my sister.
“You’re welcome,” Carlie says, the words wobbling a little. She’s still a little starstruck by Rubes. Completely understandable—the woman is the eighth wonder of the world. All three of my sisters are, if I’m honest.
“Night,” I say, wrapping Carlie back into my chest.
She laces a hand with mine for a beat before turning in my arms. “We should say our goodbyes, then.”
I lean down, pressing my forehead against hers. “Yes ma’am.”
With quick goodbyes and a questionable promise to visit Ma before we leave, we grab our coats and make our way back to the cabin. Carlie walks beside me.
“Geez, how did it get so cold in such a short period of time?” she asks, looking up at the star-studded sky.
Clear skies, cold days.
No one ever said Montana was the Bahamas.
I open the door and hold it as she walks inside.
I close the screen and pull the wooden door shut tight.
The fireplace is crackling away as we step inside.
No doubt Rubes would have made sure firelight was warming our cabin, and all the guests’ cabins, while we were all having fun at the dinner.
Flopping on the sofa, she slides off her heels. “The fire is bliss.”
I tug my coat off and hang it on the hook on the back of the door. “So, you’re sleeping there. Must be my turn to take the bed.”
Her mouth pops open on a gasp.
The grin splitting my face is ridiculous. “It’s only fair, after the bungalow.”
Removing her coat, she stands and closes the distance between us. “If I remember correctly, I gave you half of a king bed.”
Easiest catch of my life.
Hook, line, and sinker.
I resist the urge to claim her beautiful face with my palms and devour those pouty fucking lips as every drop of blood sinks south and the air in my lungs turns to ash.
I tilt my head and clear my throat, like that’ll damn well save me. “Yes, you did. But we’re having a pillow wall, can’t have you getting all handsy on me in your sleep.”
I walk toward the bed to set up the pillow wall.
To see just how far she’ll let me take this before she stops me.
I tug the hat from my head and toss it onto the chair in the corner of the room.
I toe my boots off and remove my belt before grabbing the pillows and set them in a line down the center of the bed.
Turning back, I find her right where I left her. A look of desperation sits over the rise and plummet of her too-quick breaths . . . as her chest heaves. Her hands hang by her sides.
I know exactly what has her held to the spot. Because it’s been paralyzing me for weeks. It’s been responsible for every stupid emotion I’ve had to fight off, for the strings that tug at my heart gripped in her elegant hand.
Slowly, I pad to where she stands. Brown eyes lift to find my own.
“Lawso—” Her voice breaks.
I take her face in my hands. Without a word, I sweep her up and into my arms. “Bedtime, baby.”
A little huff tumbles through her parted lips, but her gaze doesn’t leave mine.
We reach the bed as she says, “Put me down, please?”
Her voice is unsure, like I crossed some line that kissing her apparently never did.
I set her on her feet, and she takes a step back. “I can’t. I’m sorry.”
I shake my head. “Don’t be,” I breathe.
“I—you . . .” She turns her back to me. “Can you unzip me?” Her words are so soft, like she’s afraid to ask after she thought I wanted something more.
Damn every last man who’s hurt this woman. The world can go fuck itself for the damage it’s done.
I unzip her and turn her back to me with my hands on her shoulders. “I can sleep on the sofa if you—”
Her finger presses over my lips. “No, the pillow wall will suffice.”
I smile underneath her touch.
“Besides, I’m used to having you beside me now.”
I pull her closer and plant a kiss on her forehead. “If you snore, Princess, you’re on the sofa.”
She huffs through a strained giggle before her lips brush against my jaw.
And fuck.
I’m rock hard. The desperation for her is a catalyst low in my core, sending its blistering response into every fiber of my being. The need for this woman will surely kill me, but if she needs slow, we go slow. If she needs anything, it’s hers.
“I’m going to shower . . .” she whispers, breaking eye contact.
I swallow past the rock in my throat.
Tortured is a man so close to what he wants most in this life, only to be held back by some invisible wall the men before him erected.
What I wouldn’t do to take down that wall for her. Piece by piece with my bare hands, if I have to. If she would let me.
The shower turns on, and I amble to the living room and drop onto the sofa. Running my hands through my hair, I blow out a low breath and hang my head.
Fuck, I’m so gone it hurts.
My heart had to go and pick the only girl I’ve ever met whose heart is locked away. The rusted chains around it are secured with a triple padlock of sassiness, the keys long lost to a deep sea of independence. The shield she uses to keep me from finding my way in, her ambition and work addiction.
But it just so happens I was raised by two of the most loving, capable people who would go to any length to give a person what they need.
To take care of their own. In true Rawlins style, I won’t quit on Carlie.
Not until she has everything she’s ever wanted and maybe a few things she never knew she needed.
The small sigh that sounds from the bedroom sees me push off the sofa and pad to the bed.
I turn back to the coat rack and grab out my boxers from my bag.
Making quick work of my own shower, I slide into my side of the pillow-wall-separated bed.
Once I’m settled in, hands behind my head and eyes closed, the pillow in the center at my shoulder slips.
I open my eyes to find browns studying my face.
Her hands are tucked under the pillow her head rests on as she lies on her side. Her lips purse and roll as she sucks in a breath.
“Yeah, Princess?”
Her hand slides out from under the pillow and traces the angle of my jaw. “Night, Laws.”
Laws.
Not Rawlins, or even Lawson.
Just Laws.
I roll over, studying her face. Her hand reaffirms on my jaw. Her eyes light before she breaks eye contact and her hands drops from my face, sliding back to her side. I grab it before it can disappear and press her palm to my lips. “Night, baby.”
Emotion rolls through those pretty features, and I close my eyes before the sight of her beside me, her hand still clutched in my own, can take me down.