3. Ryan
Chapter 3
Ryan
Chapter 3
Ryan
I look over at a now non-crying Aspen who is talking and laughing with LD and find myself frowning. I’ve handled this all wrong. It didn’t take a rocket scientist to know that I’m the reason that Aspen took off crying. I’m an asshole. She’s just a kid. I think Talia mentioned she turns sixteen in a few months. At twenty, I should know better than to make the girl cry. I don’t have time for this bullshit. I don’t even know why I’m being like this. It’s nothing specifically against the girl. I’m just personally tired. I love my brothers and sisters, but Jesus, it feels like my entire life has been spent getting to know who my new brother or sister would be. It had been quiet for the last five years and I was glad. It felt good. Then, out of nowhere, a decision was made and done without talking to any of us. It’s nothing against Aspen, but I don’t know if I have it in me to keep trying to bond with someone else. I’m a grown ass man now. I shouldn’t have to devote time to a fifteen-year-old girl and learn how to be her big brother. I don’t especially want to be. I do need to be nicer to her though.
Talia went in search of her when she left. I don’t know what was said, but when they came back inside Aspen apologized to everyone and just said she wasn’t used to being so happy. Everyone else may have bought her excuse, but I didn’t. I know she wasn’t happy at all when she ran out. I also know that I was the reason. I’m going to have to fix that. That annoys me like hell, because again, I feel I’m too old for this shit. Still, I’m not going to be a bastard to a girl who’s had a rough life. That’s not who I am.
I breathe a sigh of relief when dinner is over. As everyone is standing up, I look at Mom and Dad and force myself to go through with my plan. “Hey guys, I’m going to bring Aspen home.”
“But I?—”
“I’d like to spend some time with her and talk. I haven’t gotten the chance. Thought I’d take her out for ice cream, and we could get to know one another. That sound okay, Aspen?” I ask, interrupting her before she can decline immediately.
“I’m not sure I can handle ice cream. I’m stuffed,” she says, her cheeks blushing a bright pink.
“You can always find room for ice cream. C’mon, I’ll show you my favorite place,” I add, trying to entice her into agreeing.
“Your favorite place? Get real,” LD mutters. “Don’t listen to him, Aspen. It’s my favorite place and their hot chocolate milk shakes are to die for. If you play your cards right, I’ll even buy you a slice of brownie cake.”
“You will?” she asks, looking between the two of us.
“Yeah, LD is riding with us because he’s a lame ass and invites himself everywhere I go,” I respond with a grin.
She smiles at me. It’s guarded, but a smile, nonetheless. “I do like hot chocolate,” she responds quietly.
“Then, it’s settled. Let’s head out. I watch as she goes around telling everyone bye. She’s reserved around them. I can’t tell if that’s normal for her, or if she’s unsure about all of this in general. I guess I never thought about it much, but maybe the idea of joining a large family doesn’t appeal to her. If that’s the case, I hope she doesn’t hurt Mom, because she’s already emotionally involved. I can tell that. If she wasn’t, she never would have tried to bring Aspen under our roof.
Mom and Dad come over to tell me goodbye. Mom hugs me like she always does. Most men my age might not hug their mother, but I will every time I get the chance. Besides, I don’t give a fuck what people think about me. If my parents are happy with me, that’s all that matters. “Thank you, Ryan. She’s special. Be nice please,” Mom whispers in my ear. I nod when we pull apart. Dad slaps me on the back, giving me a wink. He gets it. The two of us would do anything to make Mom happy. Aspen surprises me by coming up beside me and hugging my parents. I guess hers now, too.
“Thanks for the dinner, Rory. It was very sweet of you.”
“You’re part of this family now. We’re thankful you let us into your life, Aspen.”
Aspen blushes when she smiles, and even I have to admit it enhances her features. She’s really quite pretty. I’ll probably have to chase guys away from her. I can tell just by watching her that she’s pretty innocent. I didn’t even know women could still blush, and she’s done it all night. We walk outside, my hand on Aspen’s back and LD following us. When we make it to our bikes, I feel Aspen’s body tense under my fingers.
“You, okay?”
“Um, I’m not really dressed to ride a bike,” she mumbles quietly.
I look down at her dress and frown. “Shit,” I mutter.
“You can wear my cut, Aspen. It will cover most of your legs when you’re riding. Plus, it’s dark. Not like anyone could see you,” LD responds.
“You sure?”
“Yep, follow me. I’ll be your escort for the evening,” he says, laughing. I grab her hip and don’t let her though.
“She’ll get on the back of my bike. I saw who was on yours last week. I don’t want someone to see Aspen and lump her in with the same kind of girl,” I snap. I’m being an asshole, but I don’t like the idea of Aspen on the back of LD’s bike. She’s just a kid, and he’s the biggest man whore around. “I don’t want anyone getting the wrong impression.”
“I don’t think anyone would mistake Aspen for Cookie, Bro.”
“No, but they might think she’s the same type of girl. Mom and Dad trusted me to watch out for her. I’m not going to let her reputation get ruined because you let bitches like Cookie on the back of your bike,” I snap.
I can feel how tense Aspen is getting, but I want my message across. I’ve got nothing against the club girls. Some of them are nice. They enjoy sex and since I do too, I can’t hardly fault them for it. Rigs, one of the newer members, is even talking about making Jewel his old lady. I admit I’ve been with Jewel a couple times, despite my rule of not dipping my dick in the community pool. She’s sweet and genuine, plus she sucks cock so good that my fucking eyes cross from the pleasure. She’d be good at his side. I don’t think I could handle having an old lady who has fucked my brothers in the club, but since Rigs and her like to party together and there is usually more than just them that end up in Rigs’s bed at the end of the night, I figure he doesn’t care. I overheard Ellie—Fury’s old lady—tell Mom that she threatened to cut off Fury’s balls if he ever suggested they do that. Mom agreed with her. I figure most women feel that way. I’m not going to take a chance and ruin my shot with the woman I want by ever having her question my past. I keep my sex life pretty much private, and I prefer it that way.
I push my thoughts away and take off my cut. Aspen really is a tiny thing. I bet she’s five-five tops. I kind of tower over her right now. Of course, she’s probably still growing. She’s just a kid. I have to keep reminding myself of that because her body clearly isn’t. She might be young, but her curves rival that of any woman I’ve ever seen. I’ll probably have to keep men away from her, too. Shit.
“It kind of swallows you,” I respond, feeling weird seeing her wearing my cut. I’ve never let anyone put this cut on but me.
“Yeah,” she says, running her fingers over my leather cut. “What does prospect mean? Is that your club name like Diesel’s?”
I grin. “No, I’m a prospect because I’m still proving myself to the club. Once I get bumped up to a member, the club will give me a road name. I’ve been a prospect for the last two years.”
“Oh. I just figured you’d have an automatic in because of who your dad is.”
“Doesn’t work that way, Pixie.”
“Pixie?”
I shrug. “It suits you.” When she still looks confused, I let my thumb brush against the apple of her cheek. “You’re tiny and have freckles. Plus, your dress is green like Tinkerbell’s.”
She studies me and then laughs. “I’m not sure I’d let your friends know you know what color Tinkerbell wears.”
“Why do you say that?” I ask, getting on my bike. LD is already on his and watching us closely. It’s more than a little unnerving. She climbs on behind me. I watch out of the corner of my eye as she does her best to keep her dress over her thighs, but once she settles down, my cut hides her legs from the knees up—just like I knew it would.
“Just doesn’t seem very manly. Of course, the women members probably would like it.”
“There are no women members,” LD pipes up.
“There’s not?” she asks, sounding shocked.
“No. The club is a brotherhood,” I try to explain.
“Then who was Cookie that you were talking about? Is that a man? I just assumed?—”
“Cookie’s not a member of the club. She’s …”
“She’s what?” Aspen asks, and I’m suddenly wishing we had never started this conversation.
“Cookie is a club whore,” LD speaks up like he’s telling Aspen it is raining.
“What the fuck, LD?”
“What? It’s true.”
“A club whore?” Aspen says and something about her saying the word whore sits wrong with me, yet I like it too. What the hell is wrong with me? I shake my head. I know I was annoyed that she was going to be yet another member of my family, but I shouldn’t take enjoyment in the fact that her innocence is being compromised. It’s not her fault that my parents seem to desire having an entire football team under one roof.
“Yeah, they get free room and board and their bills paid in exchange for sex.”
“Jesus, fuck, LD. Do you have a brain at all between your ears?”
“What? It’s the truth. It’s not like we’re selling them to other men and keeping the profit—which a lot of clubs do, I might add. They like sex, we like it. None of us want strings. So, it’s like a business arrangement. There’s nothing illegal about it, Ry. Christ quit being a pansy. Aspen has spent her life in group homes. I doubt she’s a stranger to the real world.”
“If that’s your way of asking if I’ve spread my legs so my guardians would feed and clothe me, I haven’t,” she snaps at LD, annoyed.
“Maybe not, but I’d venture to say you’ve seen some of that,” he counters, not detoured at all.
Aspen decides to ignore him. Instead, she looks at me. “So, you don’t allow women to be members of your club, but you will use their bodies for pleasure?”
“It’s not like that. You’re just a kid who doesn’t understand the adult world. The girls do what they want.”
“Except be real members of the club, right?”
“It’s a man’s club. Women aren’t made to do the shit we have to do to defend what’s ours,” I try to explain.
“I see,” she says, but I can tell she sounds pissed.
“Are we ready to go now, or are you going to lay into me about something else you can’t understand at your age?”
“How old are you?” she asks.
“Twenty. I’ll be twenty-one in a couple of months. I’ll be a full member then.”
“You realize that you’re only like five years older than me, right?”
“You mean, do I realize that you’re an underage kid? Yeah, I got that one, Pixie.”
“Of the two of us, Ryan, I can tell you I’m probably more equipped for the real world than you are.”
“Whatever,” I scoff.
“I’m serious. I’ve grown up experiencing some of the worst shit you can imagine. On the other hand, you’ve what? Lived a cushy life in a two-story house? I bet you’ve never gone to bed hungry in your life. You’ve probably never been so sick that you thought you were going to die but are unable to go to the doctor. I guarantee you’ve never been terrified you were going to be beaten to death and no one would ever find your body, or even care if you were dead.”
“Am I supposed to give you a pity party because you grew up hard, Pixie?” I ask, holding onto my anger, even if the thought of her living that way makes something dark surge deep inside of me.
“No. I’m just pointing out that I may be five years younger than you, but I’ve had to grow up quickly. I’m not a kid .”
“You’re a kid and you’re making assumptions about me that you shouldn’t. That’s proof you don’t understand how the adult world works. You definitely have no idea how important our club is and what we stand for. There’s a reason we don’t have women members. Hell, no club I know has women members, and one day when I take over for my dad, I won’t have women as officers in the club either.”
“Then I just discovered what I’m going to do when I get out of school.”
“Oh, yeah? What’s that?”
“I’ll start my own motorcycle club. One that’s strong and can go head to toe with yours … and win. ”
“Whatever, Pixie. Let’s go get your damn ice cream and get you home. It’s past your bedtime.”
“We can skip the ice cream. Just take me back to your parents’ house.”
“Hate to break it to you, but it’s your home too now,” I point out.
“Yeah, and that’s something you don’t like. I’ve picked up on that, too. Just get me there and we won’t have to talk to one another until Rory decides to have another family gathering.”
“Whatever you say,” I grumble, tired of fighting. I thought trying to add another person to our family was a bad idea. Now, I’m sure of it . Thank God I no longer live at home. The two of us would probably kill each other. I’m going to have to make sure I stay far away from this crazy bitch, or it will hurt Mom when I tell her how I really feel about Aspen. Her head barely hits my chest. If she tried to run a club, she’d get herself killed. The woman has no idea. She probably thinks we’re like a damn Taylor Swift fan club.
LD has been watching us argue. He hasn’t said anything, but I can tell he’s fighting laughter. I share a grin with him. I know he feels the same way I do. Aspen has a fuck of a lot to learn about life.
I’m going to enjoy sitting back while watching her fall on her ass.
* * *
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