Chapter 18 The Fire
MAGDALENA
TWENTY-THREE YEARS OLD
Mom: Are you really almost here?
Me: Yes.
I chuckled at her excitement. It was worse than my siblings’.
Ember: I can’t wait to you get here so that we can hang. I’m reading these romance books now. And they are all so hot. I think you’ll like them. I go through them so fast. I just finished one this morning. How long are you staying?
Dad, who’d picked me up from the airport, met my amusement with a smile as he turned the steering wheel to drive the last mile before their house.
With all the work it’d taken to get our parliament member barely elected, I hadn’t been able to visit my family for two years.
I’d gotten used to not doing it too. There was a mix of happiness, feeling at home, and a hollowness full of anxiety in the pit of my stomach at the same time.
“She’s over-the-moon excited,” he warned me.
“I am too. You’re not gonna go work day and night on us, right?”
Not meeting my gaze, his brow tensed, and the smile left his face as he focused on the road.
I gasped at the silence. “Are you kidding me? Dad, you can’t do this. I’m only staying here a few weeks and then I have zero idea when I’ll be able to see you guys again. This job is demanding as hell.”
“I just need to finish something tonight, angel, and then I’m all yours. I promise. Maybe we can go to Bilbao and see the museum.”
“Jesus, Dad. You need to retire already.”
“What? No. I like my job. Keeps me busy. I help people.” He shrugged.
“Yeah, but I bet now that the twins are all grown up, Mom is basically all alone at home just waiting for you all day and night, right?”
“Your siblings have become your mom’s besties.” He mocked the last term. “She doesn’t need me obsessing over everything to do with her, so I give them the day to hang out and then it’s my turn. She also has her two new black kitties that she adores more than anyone, including me.”
Again, I chuckled. Dad always got jealous before falling in love with whatever cat Mom picked up.
“I can’t believe she has five cats now. How did she convince you?”
He rolled his eyes and shook his head. “Five cats? What about all the feral cats that climb into our yard and sleep and eat in those boxes she has over there? I’ve lost count.
And the ones she has inside the house, I didn’t know for months.
She hid them from me. Pretended they were the same three cats.
I thought I was finally losing my mind.” I laughed so hard my belly hurt.
“And your brother and sister were in on it. Little ungrateful bastards.” He smiled at me as we crept into the driveway.
“It’s so good to see you happy, angel. It really is.” I couldn’t believe it, but he was right. It was the first time in decades I’d laughed so hard. Maybe coming home would be good for me after all.
I didn’t have a chance to answer because within seconds, my siblings and Mom were opening the door to my side of the car. Mom embraced me right away and sniveled soon after. “Thank you,” she sobbed.
“What? Why are you thanking me?”
“For coming over. Finally visiting.”
We were all still giggling, sitting in the dining room with our stomachs full, when Dad’s chair screeched as he stood.
Mom had made all my favorites: bistec ecebollado, arroz blanco, frijoles rojos, and platano maduros.
We’d never traveled to Puerto Rico, but she always found a way to bring it to us.
“I’ll be back soon,” he said to calm the blow that was his absence to us.
My smile dropped too fast. I turned my eyes from him to Mom who had also become serious.
She had a case of the puppy eyes, too round and almost teary, looking up at him as he slowly walked around the table kissing everyone on the cheek.
When he got to her and leaned down to kiss to her mouth, it brought out her brief smile.
Dad was gigantic compared to Mom, especially because the years seemed to have shrunken her, but he was so gentle his little bird.
I had no idea what was the history behind the nickname but that’s what he always called her.
“I’ll see you later,” she said, standing, and Dad took her hand, interlacing his fingers with hers.
I thought about what Dad had said in the car, how he saw his time away from home as giving us space to be with Mom, as if when it was his turn, he couldn’t have anyone else disturb them, he had to have her all to himself.
I’d never thought of it that way. It explained his annoyance every time Aunt Mindy visited.
With her around, he didn’t get the same quality and amount of time.
I watched them as they popped a kiss on each other’s lips and whispered some stuff, probably about his schedule.
Ashton and Ember were gossiping about something too, and Ember giggled uncontrollably while Ashton just held a smile.
Mom and Dad walked toward the front door looking like some live version of Lady and the Tramp.
I’d watched them enough to know Mom was walking him to the door so they could have a longer kiss and more sweet, loving whispers.
I’d always been fascinated by them and always wished to have a love like that, inseparable soul mates with an all-consuming possessive love.
Of course, my thoughts floated to him, Killian.
I shook my head. No. Stop that. It was just a crush and now he’s gone.
The hollowness in my chest flushed my soul with loneliness.
It physically hurt my chest as if someone were punching my heart.
I sighed but thank God the twins were too distracted in their own world to hear me.
I really needed to move on, find someone to help me forget everything.
What was that quote in Spanish aunt Mindy always said at the end of a phone call?
Un clavo saca otro clavo. I promised myself I would try, maybe when I got back to London.
It felt good, a new start, challenging myself to interact with the humans.
As I picked up and stacked the dishes from around the table to take to the kitchen, I heard them.
“Yes, you will, pretty bird. I love you. You know that, don’t you?
I promise I’ll be free the rest of the time.
I was telling Magdalena maybe we could go to Bilbao.
” He gave her a kiss that obviously made her weak at the knees and took all her senses.
Mom and Dad, no matter what, had always had a connection full of sparkles.
I wondered if I’d ever have anything like that.
I didn’t think so since I’d been damaged.
“Love you too.” They kissed, and after saying goodbye to all of us one more time, he walked out.
“Do you want some flan?” Mom asked us as she piled the other dirty dishes and took them to the kitchen. She had a smile and rosy cheeks. I shook my head, not sure if I could handle so much passion as my parents.
While helping her, I said, “No, thank you. I ate way too much.”
“I’ll take some, Mom,” Ash said.
“Me too,” Ember added.
“Fine, but don’t go giving Ember all your flan, Ash, that’s too much sugar for her and then she’s grumpy in the morning ’cause she didn’t sleep.”
“Not true,” Ember yelled from the bedroom.
It was obvious Ash was taking that flan for Ember, we all knew it. Mom was just pretending otherwise.
In the kitchen, Mom turned on the radio as we cleaned, dried, and stored dishes. “So, you haven’t really told me much the last four years. I assume you made friends in the university and even more at work? Any boyfriends? What exactly is this new job about?”
I chuckled, with heated cheeks. “Honestly, I just kept to myself and focused on studying. No boyfriends, Mom. I need to get my career going before getting into a relationship.”
She nodded. “Yeah. Just …”
“What?” I tried my best to suppress the defensiveness in my tone.
“Remember to live, little angel. Life is not all about work.”
“Maybe you should give that advice to Dad.”
She stopped rinsing the plate and met my gaze. “Your father has his reasons but … maybe I’m giving you that advice because I don’t want you to go the same route as him.”
I nodded. “Okay. That’s fair. I’ll remember, Mom.”
“I just want the best for you, Magdalena. You deserve nothing less.”
Did I? I swallowed deep and scoffed.
“I mean it. You do.” For some time, we cleaned the dishes silently, just like we used to when I was a little girl. “What about all those trips to Ireland?”
And there it was. Fuck. I’d hoped she wouldn’t have noticed and if she had, I hoped she wouldn’t say anything. I shrugged. “Just exploring.”
“But why not explore other countries? Amsterdam is just a short ride away from London, you know?” I stared at her, waiting for the lecture.
She turned to me, unwilling to be intimidated by the tension I was holding in my eyes.
“You were searching for him.” She confirmed while staring into my eyes. “Do you think that’s safe?”
Every cell in my body told me not to say anything, but she knew the truth. “He would never hurt me, Mom.” She sighed, allowing her shoulders to drop then turned back to the sink, and handed me a rinsed plate. I placed it in the dishwasher.
“Do you realize how much more you deserve? Look at you. Beautiful, super intelligent, from Cambridge, two years of experience in your high-end career. And he? A fucking fugitive—”
“You don’t know that, Mom.”
The staring was intense. We were like two female lionesses about to fight.
How long had she been holding her tongue about all this?
Probably since day one. “Have you not suffered enough? You almost killed yourself. Then you spent a year in a psychiatric facility, a horrible year without us. We hardly saw you for four years. How much are you going to let him take from you—”
“Everything!” I didn’t mean to yell and regretted it so badly. “Imagine someone telling you that you deserved more than Dad,” I stated, and was surprised when her eyes filled with tears.