18. Bailey
CHAPTER 18
Bailey
I watch Caleb as he makes his way towards his truck before I lock the front door and Charlie and I walk to the car. I drop her off at school before heading to work. I’m fifteen minutes early when I get there, so I head into the kitchen and text Lily. I haven’t told her about any of the craziness of late and I feel bad for not keeping her updated.
Bailey: Hey, you free for lunch today? Lots to catch you up on.
I text Liv next.
Bailey: Thanks for the package yesterday. I appreciate it.
Liv: Of course. Let me know if you need anything at all. I’m always just a text or call away.
Bailey: Thanks.
Liv: Did you find the little surprise at the bottom of the basket?
Bailey: …
Liv: I’ll take that as a yes. Did a replay of that Friday night happen???
Liv: A girl’s got to know.
Bailey: More like a live remake of Friday.
I bite my thumbnail as I watch the bubbles pop up on the screen then disappear, then come back again. This continues for a minute before her message finally comes through.
Liv: We need a girls’ night.
Liv has added you to the group Badass Bitches
I chuckle at the name, assuming Hannah named the group chat.
Liv: Girls, we are in desperate need of a girls’ night. Bailey has some tea that needs to be shared.
Han: Happy hour tomorrow. Meet at the Clover, 5 p.m.
Zoey: Sounds juicy, I’m down.
Liz: I’ll be there.
Han: Welcome to the group chat, by the way, Bailey.
Bailey: Thanks. I’m guessing you named it.
Han: Of course I did ??
Just as I’m about to put my phone away, Lily responds.
Lily: Sounds good. Meet at the usual at 11.
Bailey: ????
I pocket my phone, head out to the reception desk, and get to work on my morning tasks. The office is pretty busy today, so time flies by. At 10:45 a.m., I grab my purse and start the walk to the corner deli to meet Lily.
When I get there, Lily has already gotten us a table in the corner for more privacy. I wave at her before going to the counter and ordering myself a sandwich and a cup of coffee and join her.
Taking a sip of my coffee, I relax in my seat. Lily picks at the muffin in front of her. When I don’t say anything right away, she leans forward.
“Okay, so you said you had lots to catch me up on. Catch me up.”
“Charlie and I are staying at Caleb’s,” I blurt.
She leans back in her chair, eyes wide and mouth agape. “I think I need my hearing checked, or are we living in some new crazy world? Did you just say that you and Charlie are staying at Caleb’s?”
“Yeah. When I got home yesterday, there was a note from Derek on my door. He said he tried to come see us and would be back. I freaked. The last visit didn’t exactly go well, so I called Caleb. He ran to us and stayed on the phone with me until he was standing right in front of me. He then insisted we were staying with him. When I said I could check with you, he refused. He said the only place he was comfortable with us staying was with him, so he could ensure that we’re safe. So, yeah, we’re staying with Caleb.”
As soon as I finish my rambling, I take a bite of my sandwich. Lily continues to sit there quietly, just watching me. I keep taking bites, trying to make sure my mouth stays full s o I don’t share more.
She squints at me and leans forward. “There’s more. You’re hiding something, you’re doing that thing where you do whatever you can to ensure you don’t blab. So blab.”
I take another bite of my sandwich, but she grabs it from my hand, grabs the plate, and moves them in front of her.
“Fine.” I pick up my coffee cup and mumble into it, “He may have watched me use a vibrator in the tub last night.” Embarrassed, I hide behind my cup.
“So let me get this straight. In the last two months, you have spent four days straight with each other, you sent him a voice message of you masturbating, and I’m guessing coming too, moved in with him, and he watched you masturbate in the tub? Am I getting all that?”
I nod. “Well, except last night, he kind of told me what to do.”
She throws her head back and groans. “How are you so lucky? How did you find this alpha man who respects you, but also wants to take care of you and your daughter? Like it doesn’t get much better.”
She’s right; he’s basically perfect. On top of everything Lily’s said, he’s opened up to me too. I know the story he told me this morning was not easy for him to tell me. It means the world to me that he did. That he was vulnerable with me. But I also wonder how long things can really be this perfect. Because I’ve been burned before, and that’s the last thing I ever want to go through again.
“You’re doing it again,” Lily says as she continues to eat her muffin in little bite-sized pieces.
“Doing what?”
“Doing the whole worst-case scenario, what-if thing. Stop. All that’s going to do is keep you from a good thing.”
“I’m attached,” I admit. “He’s opened up to me too. We haven’t even had sex, and I’m attached. Like if we were to go days without talking or seeing each other, I’d be sad, attached. Like things remind me of him and I smile attached. It has only been a two months, how has it gotten to this point? I don’t trust men. There is a reason I haven’t so much as gone on a date since the separation.” I down the remainder of my coffee. “I’m screwed, and if I’m like this”—I motion my hand over myself—“I know that Charlie’s attached. It will kill me if something happens and she’s caught in the middle.”
Lily gives me a look of sympathy. She leans forward and grabs my hand. “This is all part of life. All are part of being human. You can’t always think worst-case scenario. He’s done nothing but show you he’s a good guy. Keep relying on what he’s showing you. It will all work itself out in the end.”
I nod and grab my sandwich back from her, finishing it before hugging her and returning to work. I spend the day powering through paperwork and thinking about the last thing that Lily said.
It will all work itself out in the end.
When three o’clock hits, I grab my purse and head to Charlie’s school to pick her up, and we head back to Caleb’s house.
I’m in a daze on the way home, surprised to see that Caleb is already home when I pull into the driveway. I open the door, and Charlie goes and finds Finn in the living room while I follow the sound of a drill up the stairs and into the second guest bedroom. Caleb is in there putting together a bed frame. I see he’s already put together a nightstand and dresser.
“Hey,” I say when the drill stops.
He looks over his shoulder and smiles at me. “Hey, how was work?”
“It was good. What are you up to?”
“I told you I would get this room set up for you, so I’m putting together the bed frame. The mattress i s being delivered in about an hour. It will be all ready for you shortly.”
I’m speechless. He’s gone through all this trouble to get this set up for me. He’s bought brand new furniture.
I walk up to him, placing my hand on his shoulder. “You didn’t have to do all this, but thank you.”
“Of course, I needed to do this, Bails.” He smiles at me over his shoulder. “Charlie home with you?”
“Yeah, she’s playing downstairs in the living room with Finn before I make her do her homework. I was actually thinking about heading to my place. I have a bunch of perishables that I bought to make dinner this week and wanted to grab them so they don’t go bad.”
Caleb stiffens as he finishes putting the last screw in before standing up.
“Why don’t you give me your house keys and I’ll go pick up anything you need. Just give me a list. I don’t think you should go there by yourself right now. Have you thought about filing a restraining order to prevent him from showing up at the house?”
“The last time I considered one, I was told a judge wouldn’t grant one because I didn’t have any proof he had hit me or Charlie. I’m guessing because of Charlie’s age she can’t be a witness, and I don’t want to subject her to that, so I don’t really have any options right now. I guess I’m just going to have to look for another place to move. I’m going to have to see him eventually, he does have court-mandated visitation with Charlie.”
“You guys can stay here as long as you want or need. I won’t be pushing you guys out. I can understand your point on the restraining order, but for the visitations, I want you to make sure you always have someone else with you. Me, Lily, Liv, and I know that any of the guys would be willing to be there. I don’t want the two of you alone with him.”
I know he has a point, so I just nod. “I would appreciate it if you could grab the groceries from my place. I’ll write a list. I guess I should probably let everyone know that dinner on Saturday is cancelled.”
“Why? We can have everyone here. Just let me know what ingredients to grab from your place and I will. We’ve got the space here for everyone, so just tell them there’s a change of venue.”
I can’t wrap my head around how accommodating he’s being about everything. Derek would have never gone for people invading his space the way that Charlie and I have Caleb’s. He wouldn’t just provide an easy solution like having all my friends over for dinner because the original place didn’t work anymore.
I stare at him in disbelief. I reach forward and poke him in the peck. He doesn’t even flinch. I do it again, this time harder. He reaches up and rubs the spot.
“What gives, Bails?”
“How are you real?”
His brows pinch together. “What do you mean?”
“How are you real? You’ve taken in Charlie and I, you’re offering to host the people I invited for a dinner party, and you’ve bought new furniture for this room for me. Again, how are you real?”
He places his hands on either side of my face. “Bailey, I’m slowly realizing I’d do anything for you and Charlie. I can’t think of anything I wouldn’t do for you two. I’m real. I’m right here, and I have no intentions of going anywhere anytime soon.”
I stare into his eyes, getting lost in the sincerity in them. I go onto my tiptoes, and just as my lips brush his, the doorbell rings. He rests his forehead against mine and groans.
“That’s probably the mattress. I should go let them in.”
He kisses my forehead before retreating out of the room, and I follow behind him. He opens the door, and sure enough, there are two guys in delivery uniforms on the other side. They take the mattress upstairs while I help Charlie start on her homework and write my list. When the delivery guys leave, Caleb joins us in the kitchen.
“If you give me your keys, I’ll head over there now. I should be back in time for us to start dinner.”
Grabbing my keys from my purse and removing my house key, I hand it to him along with my list. Charlie and I finish her homework, and I work on unloading the dishwasher and cleaning the kitchen counters. My phone buzzes on the counter, and I smile, thinking it’s Caleb asking a question about the list. I check my phone and the blood drains from my face. It’s not Caleb. It’s Derek.
Derek: Bailey, I stopped by your place yesterday and you weren’t home. I’d like to see you and my daughter.
I knew this was a possibility. I just told Caleb it was, but seeing the proof in front of me makes my heart race and not in a good way. I stare at my phone, not knowing what to say. I choose to ignore the text for now and deal with it later.
By the time I finish, Caleb is returning with bags full of groceries. He puts them on the counter, and I separate what I need to make stir fry and put the rest away.
I watch Caleb and Charlie draw at the kitchen table while I cook. He’s so good with her, taking an interest in her hobbies even though she’s only five. While the sight fills me with warmth that Charlie has a male role model who has taken an interest in her, I’m so unbelievably worried he’s going to leave just as quickly as he showed up in our lives.
As we’re eating, I say, “You should invite Grayson for dinner, and anyone else you want to. Just tell me how many so I know how much food to make. I already told Liv to invit e Matt, and I’ve invited the girls and Lily.”
“Sounds good. Let me know if you need me to grab anything for the dinner.”
“I think we have everything.”
We finish eating, and Caleb sets Charlie up in the living room with Disney Plus before he comes back and helps me with clean up. We work together in silence and then head into the living room to join Charlie. He sits in the corner of the couch, and Charlie climbs right into his lap. He wraps an arm around her and pats the seat beside him, and I sit. As the movie plays, I slowly inch closer to him until my head is resting on his shoulder. His arm comes down and pulls me closer to him.
I inhale deeply as his scent wraps around me like a safety blanket and I relax into him further. The next thing I remember is being lifted off the couch and carried up the stairs. Caleb places me gently into bed and kisses my forehead before leaving the room. I dream of him. I dream of all the things I now want with him, but am not sure I’d ever ask for.
I ’m woken by the sounds of Caleb’s nightmare. I pad to his bedroom, slowly opening the door and making my way to him. It pains me to see him like this as he thrashes in bed, calling the name of his friend. I wake him gently like I did the last time and grab a cold washcloth from the washroom using it on his forehead as he falls back to sleep.
W e find a routin e throughout the week. Caleb hangs out with Charlie while I cook dinner, we watch a movie or a show together, take Finn for a walk, and then we all head to bed. Derek reaches out a few times throughout the week, but I continue to ignore him. On Thursday, Caleb has a game, so it’s just Charlie and I at home because it’s too late for Charlie to go. I leave him a covered plate on the table with a note before I head to bed.
Every night, I go into Caleb’s room and use a washcloth on his forehead when he wakes from his nightmare. Once he falls back asleep, I make my way back to my room and wish I could find a way to take away his pain.