Twenty
You remind me of a summer ago
Sipping wine in a chateau
Little did I know
Where we’d end up
‘What Happened Next’ from Roses
I really need to talk about this to Ollie, who has become more and more distant since the ticket incident. Shockingly, I manage to get hold of him on FaceTime on a Friday night.
‘I can’t believe it’s now October. Time has gone by so quick,’ says Ollie.
And it has, we’ve barely spoken in the last week. It’s hard to believe, since we used to talk to each other every day.
‘I know,’ I say. ‘It’s so dark now.’ I’m trying to not watch myself in the tiny corner screen and focus on Ollie’s face.
‘How have you been?’ he says, the camera suddenly moving as he rolls to his side on the bed.
I inhale deeply. If anyone knows me the best, it’s Ollie.
‘Right now, focusing on uni,’ I say. ‘I should apply after Christmas.’
‘I’ve sent mine off,’ he says. ‘Getting a headstart and all that.’
‘Lawyer Ollie incoming,’ I say.
‘Oh yeah,’ he says. ‘Have you picked yet?’
This is what I like about Ollie. No assumptions, he knows me.
‘I’m thinking about doing English,’ I say.
‘Great,’ he says. ‘You’ve always liked reading.’
I think of Ty, how he calls me Writer, how he says I know my words. Ty knows I like to create, build with language.
‘Actually,’ I say, taking a deep breath, ‘I’ve started doing some journalism for the school newspaper.’
‘Really, that’s great,’ says Ollie. ‘What are you writing about?’
I explain how I’ve turned my Selena Says into an anonymous column. At the end he is silent.
‘What do you think?’
‘Is this not like a gossip column?’ he says.
‘No!’ I protest. ‘It’s my opinions.’
‘Then why not do it with your own name?’
I fall silent. This is not the response I want. Because I’m afraid of expressing my opinion out loud? But how could someone like Ollie, who is so confident in what he thinks, and never is afraid to say it, understand that?
‘Never mind,’ I say. ‘It’s a side thing. My classes are the main reason I want to do English.’
‘What are you reading now?’
‘We’re doing The Great Gatsby at school. It’s pretty good.’
‘Ah, we’ve started with Shakespeare. Good old Romeo and Juliet.’
‘Enjoying reading about star-crossed lovers?’ I say, my breath hitching a bit. Maybe this will trigger something in Ollie. Maybe he’ll see us in the text. Without the tragic ending.
‘Not particularly,’ he says. ‘I wanted Macbeth or Hamlet.’
‘Fair enough.’ How could I have imagined he would say something else? ‘How’s school, then?’
‘It’s getting better. I’ve actually made a few friends. None of them on par with Selena Pia, of course.’
But I don’t want to talk about Ollie’s new friends. Especially as it was because of them I didn’t get the Rose Conrad tickets. I move on. ‘And how’s Manchester?’
‘It’s so cold here,’ he says. ‘Much more than down south. But all the lights are coming out now, and it looks really nice.’
‘The way Ty complains about the weather, you may as well think it’s Siberia down here,’ I say.
‘Ty?’ says Ollie, looking confused. ‘Who’s Ty?’
‘The new neighbour,’ I say. I feel a slight sense of panic about bringing him up. It doesn’t feel right and I don’t know why.
‘I thought you disliked him?’ says Ollie, raising his eyebrows.
‘I do!’ I say, and I watch as my eyes become wider in the corner screen. I need to make myself look more chill. ‘He is egotistical and annoying and has this really specific way of saying the wrong thing, but . . .’
‘But what?’ says Ollie.
‘But I see him all the time, so he’s impossible to ignore,’ I say.
‘That’s good,’ says Ollie. ‘I would hate to think someone’s replaced me.’
‘Oh, absolutely not,’ I say. Is Ollie . . . jealous? I smile at the thought. ‘You know you can’t be replaced. Even with a few weeks apart.’
‘Oh, which is why you should come to Manchester for my birthday! The first of November is on the last weekend of half term too, so hopefully you’ll be able to travel. It’s my eighteenth, after all. What do you think?’
‘Really? Are you sure you want me there, not your new friends?’
‘Well, yes, but you should come too, so you can meet everyone. What are you thinking about doing for your birthday?’
I feel a surge of delight. Ollie hasn’t forgotten about me after all. ‘Oh, you know I’ve got until the beginning of December to think about what I want to do about mine. But I will be there for yours.’