Chapter 38
thirty-eight
RYAN
The villa is exactly what I expected from Elena’s team. Over-the-top, romantic to the point of being ridiculous, and designed to make people fall in love on camera. The whole place screams “fairy-tale romance” in a way that would normally make me roll my eyes.
But watching Wren step inside, her eyes wide as she takes it all in, I have to admit, it’s pretty impressive.
Her fingers tighten around the strap of her bag like it’s the only solid thing in the room. She takes a step forward, then freezes again when her gaze lands on the bedroom visible through the open doorway. One king-sized bed dominating the space.
She’s tense, though. I can see it in the set of her shoulders, the way she’s scanning the space like she’s looking for an escape route.
“You gonna relax anytime soon, Rustin?” I tease.
She crosses her arms and gives me a look that could melt steel. “This is a nightmare.”
I grin because her attitude is so perfectly Wren. “Come on. We’ve had worse.”
“Have we?” She gestures around the villa, then stops. “Tell me you didn’t know about this.”
I shrug, trying to play it casual even though my pulse kicks up at the sight of that bed, too. “I mean, it is a romance show.”
“Oh my God.” She puts her face in her hands. “I hate everyone.”
“Including me?”
She peeks at me through her fingers. “Especially you.”
But there’s no real heat behind it. I can see the corner of her mouth twitching like she’s fighting a smile.
The breakfast is beautiful but untouched. The pool is cool but quiet. We go through the motions, pretending we’re in a fairy tale. But under it all, the tension is unbearable.
I catch Wren watching me when she thinks I’m not looking. The way her eyes follow my movements when I’m getting out of the pool, water running down my chest. She catches me staring, too, when she’s drying off her hair and the towel rides up to show a strip of skin at her waist.
Neither of us acknowledge it. But it’s there.
As the day stretches on and we’re sitting by the pool with drinks we’re both nursing slowly, Wren finally breaks.
“This isn’t going to end well,” she sighs.
I tilt my head, studying her profile in the soft lighting. “You always assume the worst, huh?”
She turns to look at me. There’s something in her expression I can’t quite read. Resignation, maybe. Or fear.
“You don’t?”
I think about that for a second. “I don’t know what happens after this.” I pause, watching her closely. “But I know what I want right now.”
Her breath catches and her lips part slightly. The tension that’s been building all evening suddenly feels like a live wire between us.
I lean in, just enough to test the waters. Close enough that I can smell her shampoo, feel the warmth of her skin. Close enough to kiss her if she lets me.
She doesn’t pull away.
“Ryan,” she whispers.
“Yeah?”
“I need to tell you something. About before. About when we were kids.”
I settle back slightly, giving her space but not moving away entirely. “Okay.”
She takes a shaky breath and suddenly the words start pouring out of her.
“You made me feel like such a loser,” she says, her voice quiet but intense.
“All those years, the way you’d tease me, the way you’d look at me like I was this annoying little kid who didn’t know anything.
I spent so much time trying to be cool enough, smart enough, pretty enough to make you stop seeing me that way. ”
I feel like she’s punched me in the gut. “Wren…”
“I would practice conversations in my head, trying to think of something clever to say that would make you actually see me as a person instead of just Jay’s dumb little sister.”
“You think I hated you?” The words come out quieter than I intended. “Wren, I never…”
“I don’t even know why I’m telling you this.”
“Because it matters.”
“I used to hate how you looked through me. Like I didn’t matter. And then I hated how much I wanted to matter.” Her voice cracks slightly. “I used to steal your hockey jerseys because they smelled like you and I was so pathetic that even negative attention from you was better than being invisible.”
I’m staring at her now, this woman who’s been driving me crazy for months. Years, even. I’m seeing her completely differently. Not as the confident, sarcastic girl who gives as good as she gets, but as the kid who felt overlooked and ignored.
“You were never invisible to me,” I say.
“Right.”
“I’m serious. Wren, you were Jay’s little sister. You were off-limits. Untouchable. I had to push you away.”
“Why?”
“You think I didn’t notice you? You think I didn’t see how smart you were, how funny, how beautiful? I noticed everything about you. That’s why I had to be such an ass. Because the alternative was admitting that I had feelings for my best friend’s little sister.
“I thought I was protecting you by keeping my distance. But all I did was make you feel small. I fucking hate that.”
We stare at each other across the small space between us. I can see her processing this. Reevaluating everything she thought she knew about our history.
“I’m fucked up,” I tell her. “I’m broken in ways you don’t even know about. But being with you… it helps. You make me feel like maybe I’m not as damaged as I thought.”
“I’m just as broken as you are,” she says quietly. “We’re two half people, trying our hardest to become whole.”
The honesty in her voice undoes something in my chest. This conversation, this moment, it’s the most real thing that’s happened to me in years.
This is the first real choice we’ve been allowed to make. No cameras. No producers. Just us.
“So what do we do?” I ask.
“I don’t know.”
I reach out, tracing the edge of her knee with my thumb. “Want to figure it out together?”
She looks at me for a long moment, then nods.
“Yeah,” she whispers. “I’d like that.”