Chapter Twelve
When Cornelius tugged the pocket watch from his waistcoat and checked the time, he was astonished to see it was nearly seven-thirty. The last ninety minutes had gone by in a blur, and what was more, he didn’t wish for this little bubble from the real world to fade.
As he turned his head, he pressed his lips to the top of Penny’s head.
Oddly, he feared he liked her more than was good for him, and that could only spell disaster for them both.
Then he frowned. Why am I so stupid? He’d neglected to withdraw the last two times he’d come together intimately with her, and what if a pregnancy resulted from one of those couplings?
He would become a father, but he didn’t want to force her into a marriage out of obligation; she wouldn’t wish for that either, and yet, if he didn’t marry her should such a complication come due, she would be tossed from society with a ruined reputation.
Not to mention that Birchfield would drag him to an illegal dueling field and then put a ball through his heart for defiling and ruining his sister.
He shouldn’t chase anything in the event it might not happen, for that sort of rejection might further poke at the demons in his brain. Stirring, he urged her head off his shoulder. “I should go. Shall I drive you home? Someone will start to look for you soon.”
The look of drowsy satisfaction on her face went straight to his stones.
“Of course you can drive me, but not to Weymouth’s St. James townhouse.
To my brother’s home. Remember, I’m scheduled to eat dinner with him and Mama tonight.
” When she gained her feet, she brushed off dust and lint that clung to her skirts.
“And I need time to change.” She shrugged.
“I sent a gown and accessories ahead this morning.”
“Clever.” He accepted the hand she offered to help him off the floor. A groan escaped as his muscles protested. “God, I feel ancient at times.”
“Hardly that, Cornelius. You are still quite vital from what I’ve experienced.”
Heat climbed up the back of his neck. While he retrieved his greatcoat, he said, “You are quite brave.”
“Why is that?”
“Having dinner with your brother and mother? When they are both actively trying to match you with someone?” He shoved his arms into the sleeves of the garment.
“They mean well. And yes, their efforts—pushing—are quite annoying, but they are relatively harmless.” A smile curved her lips. “But at the end of the day, I am adamant that I don’t wish to marry again. At least, not right now.”
Well, there was his confirmation. He nodded. “And neither should you until you’re ready and you find a man you can picture sharing a life with. A life full of lovely memories and times you can both cherish.”
Would he ever have that for himself?
As they emerged from the stacks, Penny shot him a look of concern. “Why don’t you join us for dinner? Even a rogue must eat.”
“In that case, I’d be delighted to join you.
” Truth be told, he wasn’t enjoying the fact he had to sneak about in order to be with her.
She deserved more than that. Hell, she deserved the world at her feet and a man who would dote on her for the rest of her life.
Did he have the wherewithal to be that man? As broken as he currently was?
There was no easy answer just now.
After Penny donned her reticule and bonnet, she gathered up the few bags and boxes he’d left on the counter for her. “Are you going to tell me what little gifts you’ve brought me?”
“No.” Cornelius shook his head. “I want you to have the thrill of the surprise. Open them later tonight after dinner.” Would she like the fripperies he’d chosen for no other reason than he thought she might enjoy them?
“How sweet.” She handed him the parcels so she could grab her reticule. “We should take our leave. My brother is a tad ornery if his dinner is delayed.”
He followed her out of the shop and waited patiently as she locked the door.
“Birchfield can wait. It’ll be good for him.
” Once she finished, he led the way toward a cab stand, for it would have taken far too long to send a boy to his home in order to summon his carriage.
Besides, the distance between the bookshop and his best friend’s home wasn’t far.
“It’s so beautiful out here tonight,” Penny said with a fair amount of awe in her voice as the light snow fell around them. “Don’t you think?”
“I do, indeed.” But his gaze was fixed on her instead.
When she caught him, the grin she shot him set fire to his insides. “Oh, you.”
“You know I’ll be severely underdressed for dinner, which means your mother will eye me askance.”
“Mama can overlook it this once, or perhaps Johnathan can lend you a tailcoat. He’s slightly broader in the chest than you, but it could work.”
“Bah.” He shook his head. “I’ll wager I’ll survive.”
However, she’d been correct. The night was very near perfect.
If anyone could make him want to be leg shackled, it was her, but could he trust that she wouldn’t give up on him?
The last woman he’d let his heart become involved with had declared him not a whole man, and she’d done it in letter form while he’d still been in India.
Penny wouldn’t prove as cruel, but would she consider him worthy?
Besides, she didn’t wish to marry again. She’d already said as much.
*
Wilmington House
No. 23 Hanover Place
Mayfair, London
No sooner had they arrived at Birchfield’s townhouse than the earl joined him in the drawing room while Penny and her mother went to dress for dinner.
“How lovely to see you again, my friend,” the earl said, with a grin. “When Penny mentioned you’d stay for dinner, I was perplexed, for I didn’t know you’d come in together. She said you’d hired a cab to convey her home?”
“It is.” Cornelius made his way to the sideboard, where he poured a measure of brandy into a cut crystal glass. “Uh, I was walking through Mayfair as I do many evenings. When I came to the bookshop, I saw her out locking up. Thought I’d save you the trip of coming by.”
“You’re a good man,” Birchfield said, as he approached Cornelius. “I’m glad you thought to look after her.”
He didn’t especially feel like a good man, especially since he’d put the earl’s sister through her paces not two hours earlier, on a bookshop ladder no less. “I appreciate the fact that you think so.” After taking a sip of the brandy, he continued. “You could have said I was a bounder.”
“Is there a reason for me to think that?” One of the earl’s eyebrows rose in question.
“God, let’s hope not.” Cornelius moved to a chair then fell into it and rested his cane nearby. “It’s been a long day, my friend.” But he wouldn’t change it for anything.
“Why? You seem almost happy tonight, and that is most uncommonly not you. Care to explain?” Birchfield took a chair near Cornelius. “It’s not like you. In fact, I can’t remember the last time I saw you so… relaxed.”
“Who can say?” He shrugged and concentrated his gaze on the drink in his hand.
“Perhaps the monkeys and parrots in my brain have settled for a time. I really couldn’t say what has precipitated the change.
” When he pressed his lips together, he knew, but he’d be a dead man to say.
“I’ve recently been talking to someone, and that has helped. ” It wasn’t a lie.
“Good for you.” Birchfield’s expression lit while he sipped his own brandy. “Did Penny confide in you on the ride over? She had so many parcels, I’ll wager she had a bit of a shop earlier, and that usually makes her happy. I figured she might feel chatty as well.”
Heat made itself known on the back of his neck, for those parcels were his gifts to her. “She did not. Was she supposed to talk with me about something?”
“I couldn’t say. She’s just been uncommonly… congenial, perky, really, it you will. Of course, she still has a smart mouth, but there’s nothing for that.”
Cornelius couldn’t help his chuckle. “Well, she does have spirit.” If it was any other woman they spoke of, he would tell the earl that she just needed creative carnal endeavors to keep that mouth busy, but he stopped himself at the last moment, for this wasn’t some doxy.
It was Birchfield’s sister and Cornelius’s lover, yet she was more than that, wasn’t she?
“Well, I only asked because there is a man I’m going to introduce her to at the Valentine’s rout. He’s of an age with her, a determined banker, and he’s the sort of man she might fall for.”
“What?” His gut hurt as if he’d received a punch. “Who is it?” Even though he’d known his friend intended to match Penny, he hadn’t expected it so soon nor would it ache so much.
“Viscount Middleton.”
“Fuck me.” Cornelius choked on the swallow of brandy he’d just taken. “That man’s a rogue with a reputation.”
“So says the man with an even worse reputation,” Birchfield said, with a laugh and amusement dancing in his eyes. “However, Middleton has the potential not to be, if matched with the right woman.”
And he wanted to dangle his sister in front of the bounder as incentive?
“It’s not your sister’s responsibility to raise a man or change him in the hopes he’ll better himself.
” Would the viscount be the man to turn Penny’s head?
The thought had the power to send him back into the doldrums. “And hasn’t she already suffered enough by being forced into a relationship she wasn’t enthusiastic about? ”
This time, Birchfield frowned. “Well, it all depends on her, but Penny’s the sort to need a project.”
Cornelius snorted. “If she’s not impressed, he won’t have a chance. She’s not a meek and mild miss any longer. She’ll shred him alive.” Oddly, he wanted to see that in person.
“I don’t know about that.” The earl darted his gaze away. “He’s already asked for her hand. I’m tempted to agree, merely so I’ll know she’ll be looked after, and I won’t need to worry.”