Chapter 25
Chapter Twenty-Five
Sam
H aving her here is just as perfect as I imagined it would be, even if it’s not exactly the cozy nesting I’ve been fantasizing about. It’s something. After our shared admissions in her hotel room yesterday, I’m glad she seems willing to take this slow.
Or, as slow as we can take it when we’ve already shared almost every part of ourselves.
Knowing that she wants me as much as I want her, and that she understands why this is so difficult for me, has proven to be both comforting and terrifying. I’ve openly acknowledged the reasons why this is crazy and could never work but we do nothing to distance ourselves from it.
Talk about a shared fate.
I only hope it’s not the disaster I’ve been imagining every second that I’m not imagining her lush, naked body in my bed.
“I’m a pretty good cook, if that’s the kind of work you had in mind.”
Naomi comes up behind me in the main house, walking straight up to my back until her cheek presses against my shoulder blade. I smile and reach back to catch one of her hands, bringing her around to the front.
And I almost kiss her right then and there, but something holds me back. Maybe it’s knowing that if I start kissing her now, I’ll never stop.
And this tour is far from over.
“I was thinking more along the lines of yard work,” I reply with a grin.
Naomi oohs and aahs over my little kitchen, complete with the gas stove that I had barged over—one of only two things I purchased new from the outside world. I’m especially proud of the kitchen, with its handbuilt, sanded countertops and deep, stainless-steel sink that I salvaged from the wreck of a restaurant that we transformed into Raft.
When I started building this property into my forever home, I designed the kitchen with a family in mind. Big meals shared at the outside table, cooking and eating together.
It hasn’t gotten nearly as much use as it deserves, mostly offering a single burner flame for me to reheat food from the resort or boil water for coffee. Someday, though. I keep making the little room big promises. Ones I hope I’ll be able to keep.
Once we’ve toured the whole living space, Naomi lets me help her into a wide brimmed sun hat that was left here years ago during some all hands on deck work party that makes her look the part of adventurous homesteader in the tropics. My heart aches.
“Why don't you drop those straps and let me sunscreen your back?”
The mischievous smile Naomi tosses me has my dick coming to life. As do her next words.
“Maybe it’d be easier if I just took it off.”
I smile and stalk toward her, bottle of SPF 50 under one arm. “It’s best to limit sun exposure to your more…sensitive parts.” I run my hands up her torso and stop just before I have one breast cupped in each hand on the outside of her shirt, running my thumbs down the sides of luscious, bitable breasts. “Especially this time of day.”
Not that I don’t want her to strip off this tiny shirt and let me get my mouth on her skin, but again, I know I can’t be trusted once I begin.
“Well, we can’t have me getting my nips sunburned, now can we?” She’s playfully egging me on, and I’m both excited and terrified.
I take a step forward, allowing the now stiff situation in my pants to brush up against her hip.
Naomi’s eyebrows raise. “Oh really? It’s the sunscreen and funny hat that’s doing it for you, isn’t it?”
“It’s the woman in the hat, actually.”
“Well, farmer, you know where I stand on this.”
Her words send chills down my spine because I do, indeed, know. She would let me strip her bare right here and have my way with her.
I steady my breathing to keep from diving headfirst into the ocean of gorgeous, smooth skin before me.
“Maybe just the straps for now,” I manage to get out, voice surprisingly even.
Her smile turns sly. “Sure, sure. Let’s not get carried away or anything. I hear there’s plenty of yard work to do.”
I take my time rubbing the sweet-smelling lotion onto every exposed inch of her body, from her ankles to the tip of her nose.
“Jeez, Sammy. I never imagined sunscreen could be so erotic. I’m going to be thinking about that in my bed later.”
Unless you end up in my bed…
I give her a little extra dab on her chin, which she playfully rubs off.
Water and Bluetooth speaker in hand, we head out to the corner of the yard where I was working the day before. It’s a partially shaded, mostly flat patch of earth that I envision housing handmade wooden compost bins as soon as I can get the vines cleared.
And build the compost bins.
The projects of homeownership never end.
“What’s the plan, boss?”
I smile over at Naomi, who stands with her hands on her hips, surveying the site. “I’m going to cut back these vines.” I gesture to the now wildly overgrown section of flowering vines that I cut back the season before. “And you can rake them into a pile. We’ll haul them out in the wheelbarrow.”
I watch as she turns in a full circle, rake in hand, evaluating my plan.
“You know what?” she says finally. “This will make for some excellent pictures. I’m going to go grab my phone.”
I laugh softly and nod, not a bit surprised by this proclamation. The only thing that’s a bit curious is the fact that her phone isn’t already on her. I can feel the weight of my own phone in my fifth pocket, my now constant companion. “Run on up and grab it. I’m going to get started.”
She runs off, and I drag the weed-eater out of the small shed near our worksite. I’m checking the line and oil when I hear her cry out. I drop everything and bolt for the house.
I fly through the back door just in time to see Naomi rushing out the front door toward the driveway. I follow. By the time I get out to the front porch, she’s already finished her search of the golf cart’s floorboards and is collapsing into the driver’s seat.
I walk over and slide into the passenger seat beside her. “Everything okay?” I ask, even though the answer is obvious .
She just groans and rests her forehead on the steering wheel. “I forgot my phone.”
I bite my fist to keep from smiling, and I’m grateful Naomi isn’t looking at me. This is clearly a devastating situation for her, so I want to be supportive.
“Why don’t you head back to Dom’s and grab it? You know the way back now, so it will only take a few minutes.”
After the quick, third-hand conversation I had with Fran about Naomi being on the run from Dom’s, I have a feeling I know the answer, but I still want to give her the space to talk about it in her own time.
Naomi just shakes her head again. “I can’t go back there yet.”
My forehead creases with concern. This sounds like more than just a little sibling annoyance. “Why not? What happened?”
She flops back in her seat and lets her head drop backward to rest on the metal bar behind her. “Just a stupid fight.”
“Tell me.”
She sighs and finally looks my way. “It’s why I came over here in the first place. To talk to you about it.”
“But you changed your mind?”
“Once you started showing me your house, I just loved being here, the last thing I wanted to do was ruin it with my petty problems.”
I reach over and slide my arm around her shoulders, pulling her closer to me. “Let’s hear it.”
“They wanted to talk this morning, and it was going okay?—”
“They?”
She huffs out a laugh. “Yeah. Dom and Reina. My new parents, I guess.”
“Okay…” I’m nervous about where this is going. My loyalties ha ve been solidly in the corner of those two people up until very, very recently.
“Seriously, at first Dom was all nice about everything and told me he followed me on Instagram, which I had no idea about. But then he started in on this stuff about how it wasn’t his fault he hadn’t called in five years because he saw on my feed that I was doing okay. And I was like, you can still call someone just to say hi, and he was like, phones work both ways.”
She lets out another sigh, nestling closer to me. I hold her tightly, waiting for her to go on.It’s incredible to me, now that I have this perfect, interesting, kind person in my life, how little Dom actually mentioned her over the years. I never gave it much thought, but it’s all I can think about now. I guess I’m about to learn a lot more about the reasons behind his behavior. I try not to kick myself for not asking him sooner.
“That was the beginning of the end. He claimed he would worry about me less if I was in a relationship, and I told him I knew he threatened every man on the island against touching me. It went really downhill from there. He told me I needed a plan for my life, as if the entire career I built for myself was nothing. I stormed into my room and grabbed my bag and,” her voice drops as a sob escapes her lips, “forgot to grab my phone. I’m sure I would have noticed before I got too far, but Reina chased me down the path trying to get me to feel sorry for him.”
“You can use my phone?” I offer stupidly, still trying to process the back and forth of her and Dom’s argument.
She sits up, wiping her face with both hands. “It’s not the same. And it’s not even about the phone. I don’t even need it, really. It’s just…”
I wait patiently for her to get wherever she’s going.
“It’s always been my whole life, that phone. My community, my brain, my entertainment, my map. Hell, it’s my credit card. How could I have forgotten it?”
“You were upset.”
She deflates right before my eyes. “I guess.”
“Sounds like you’re upset about losing things that the phone represented, is that right? And that happened before this morning, but you’ve been putting off processing the feelings you’re having about the losses of those things? Your community, your job?”
Naomi turns her head slowly to face me, pinning me with her intense stare. Her mouth is open slightly, and I can almost watch her mind working. She stares at me for so long I start to get nervous that I said something wrong and screwed up any chance I had of ruining my entire life with this woman.
Finally though, she turns her gaze back to the house. “Yeah. You’re right.”
I reach for her hand, and she doesn’t pull away, but she doesn’t squeeze mine back either. I’m still in this limbo, waiting for whatever she’s about to say next.
“I don’t know what to do.”
Her words fall heavy in the hot, dusty air between us. I listen to them fall, wishing I had a magic wand I could wave to make this all better for her.
“I ran. I packed a bag, okay three bags, and got on a plane. I didn’t see any other options. There was no one to call. No one to help me.”
She turns her gaze back to me suddenly, and I can see her holding back tears. I want to pull her close once more, but I can tell she needs to get this out.
“I have almost a million followers but not one friend.”
I squeeze her hand firmly as her deep, dark truth surfaces. I know it must be painful for her to admit that, but it’s the first step in healing. “ Well, you have me.”
Her head drops and she looks down at where I hold her limp hand in mine. Her silence speaks volumes.
She doesn’t have me, and she knows it. She has me right now, when no one can see us. She has me, a guy who would deny any connection with her if asked. A guy who’s too chickenshit to stand up and tell the world he wants to be with her.
“I’ll tell him,” I blurt out before I lose my nerve. It’s the only thing to say. “I’ll tell everyone.”
Naomi sighs, still not looking at me. “No, it’s okay. This isn’t really about that. This is my own shit, and I don’t think it’s going to be helped by you firebombing your whole life, which is the only safe place I have right now.”
She looks up at me then, eyes sad but dry. “Let’s just play it cool, okay? Just like we decided. At least for now. And I,” she takes a big breath and blows it out, “need to learn how to live without my phone. Without anyone watching. Except you.”
And that is how, after telling myself I wouldn’t, I find myself in a secret relationship with my best friend’s little sister.
Kind of secret, anyway.
For now.
“You want to see how I solve most of my problems?” I ask, grateful to finally have something to offer that I’m sure will work.
“I’d love that.”