Chapter 14 – Go Lose Your V-Card #2
“Axel, don’t be mean,” I said. I know I’d joked around about it too a bit.
But it was pretty clear that Sophie was hurting.
And he didn’t need to rub it in. But maybe it wasn’t clear to him.
The last couple weeks, I barely recognized him.
He’d been skipping school practically every other day.
And he was always either high or drunk. Tonight he was both, a mix that didn’t look good on him.
“It’s a work in progress,” Sophie said. “Laugh all you want, but I’m going to marry him. And we’re going to live happily ever after.”
Axel did laugh at that. “Happily ever afters don’t exist, Soph.” He downed the cup he’d just refilled and filled up another. “I think it’s about time we all grew up.”
“I think you’ve had too much to drink,” Sophie said.
“The party is only just getting started.” Axel tapped his cup against Sophie, spilling some beer down the side.
Seriously, how much had he had to drink? The party really had only just started.
Sophie leaned close to him and sniffed him. She scrunched up her nose.
“Are you sniffing me?” Axel laughed. “Please, I don’t need anyone else to be obsessed with me.” He stared right at me when he said it.
I’d been getting a lot better at not letting Axel hurt my feelings.
But the way he stared at me when he said those words made my cheeks feel hot.
I’d told him I’d saved my first kiss for him, but he’d never truly spoken of it again.
I’d thought he’d forgotten. I’d hoped he’d forgotten. But I guess he remembered.
“No one is obsessed with you, asshat,” Sophie said. “I thought I smelled vodka on you. Were you drinking before you got here?”
“I had a few drinks in the locker room.”
Sophie sighed. “Are you trying to get expelled?”
“Who cares if I am?”
“The whole school would care.” Sophie slapped him in the back of the head. “We’re this close to the championship game. Get your act together.”
Axel rubbed the spot. And then he tried to hand me his joint. “Here. Your new favorite.”
I swatted his hand down. “You need some water.”
“That’s not what I need.” He took another puff.
“Yes, you do.” I grabbed a cup and filled it up at the sink. I tried to hand it to him, but he refused.
“That’s not what I need.” It sounded more like a plea than a statement. Like he was begging me not to give it to him.
“Then what do you need?”
He exhaled slowly and shook his head. “What does it even matter anymore?”
I glanced at Sophie.
“Axel, let me take you home,” Sophie said and put her hand on his arm.
“Seriously, Soph.” He shook her off. “Are you going to be begging me for a kiss next?”
I felt tears welling in the corners of my eyes. I didn’t know what his problem was. But he was no longer my problem. I turned to Soph. “Sophie, what else did you need help with before I head out?”
“Oh. I just wanted to plan the Sadie Hawkins dance relocation. But I guess we’ve already got a plan.”
“The school cafeteria,” I said.
“No, I’ll figure it out. Go lose your V-Card.”
Axel dropped his cup on the ground and his beer spilled in every direction. I jumped out of the way before it could hit my sneakers.
“Party foul,” Sophie said and grabbed a roll of paper towels.
Jacob walked up and put his arm around my shoulders. “Hey, love.” He kissed the side of my forehead. “What did I miss?”
“Nothing,” I whispered. “Can we please get out of here?”
Jacob lowered his eyebrows. “Is everything okay?”
No. Not even close. I shouldn’t have come to this party. We should have left together after the game in Jacob’s truck. We’d be out of the city by now. Somewhere beneath the stars.
“Scarlett was just telling me about your plans tonight,” Axel said. “Congrats. And it’s real mature of you to not be upset that I slept with her first. Several times, actually.”
What the hell, Axel?!
“What?” Jacob said. His arm fell from my shoulders.
“Axel is drunk,” I said. “And high out of his mind. Clearly.”
“I’m sober enough to remember sleeping with you,” Axel said with a smile.
“He just slept in my bed a couple of nights because I was scared,” I said. “Nothing happened. I swear.” I glared at him and then looked back up at Jacob. “It was before we got together. I’m sorry, I should have told you. But it meant nothing.”
“Just...sleeping?” Jacob asked.
“Of course,” I said.
I couldn’t read Jacob’s expression. And that worried me.
“Sorry,” Axel said. “I figured she would have told you about that. Scarlett, you should wear that little silk number for my boy here tonight. He’ll like it.”
It felt like my pajamas were burning a hole in my purse.
“This is really great,” Axel said. “The four of us together. Just like old times. Jacob, you need a drink.” He grabbed an empty cup to fill it up.
This didn’t feel like old times. Not even a little.
“Okay, let’s get you home, Axel,” Sophie said.
“Seriously, Sophie, if you want to hook up just say so. I’d rather you just be honest with me. And I don’t mind spanking you with a ruler...”
“Would you please stop talking before you say something you’re going to regret?” Jacob said.
I think it was a little too late for that.
Axel laughed. “And what do you know about regret? Everything is just handed to you on a silver platter.”
That wasn’t true. And Axel knew it.
“What do you say, Soph?” Axel said. “Those two are fucking. Why don’t we give it a go too? And then we can all double date and live happily ever after. Or whatever make believe shit you said earlier. Doesn’t that sound perfect?” He stared at me when he said it.
The thought of Axel sleeping with Sophie made my stomach churn.
Sophie shook her head and pulled out her phone. “I’m going to get him an Uber.”
“I’m just going to take him home,” Jacob said. He lightly touched my arm. “Meet me downstairs in half an hour and we can get out of here?”
I breathed a sigh of relief. “You still want to go? You’re not upset?”
“It’s a long drive. We’ll have plenty of time to talk.”
“Jacob, I’m really sorry,” I said. “I know I should have told you about...”
“It’s okay,” he said. “It didn’t mean anything.”
I nodded. “It didn’t.”
I would have been worried, but then he kissed my cheek like he always did.
“I love you,” he whispered. And then he grabbed Axel’s arm and pulled him out of the kitchen.
Sophie sighed like that was the most draining thing in the world. “I don’t know what Axel’s problem is, but he’s exhausting.” She laughed and shook her head.
I wanted to laugh too. But nothing about what had just happened was very funny. “I really should have told Jacob about all that earlier. Did he seem upset to you?”
Sophie shook her head. “He seemed more annoyed by Axel than upset. What did he whisper to you?”
“To meet him downstairs in half an hour.”
“Well, that’s great. He still wants the night to go as planned. He’s obviously not mad.”
“But he also said it would be a long drive so we could talk.”
She made a face.
“But then he said it was okay and that he loved me.”
Sophie smiled. “You two are fine. He’s so smitten with you, I can’t even. It’s probably good that all of this came out. It’ll just make you guys stronger.”
“Then why did you tell me not to tell him?”
She shrugged. “Sorry. I thought he’d freak out. But I forgot how chill he is.”
Yeah. Chill. I glanced at the clock on the wall. The minutes ticked by slowly as the music blared.
I headed downstairs early and waited by the curb for Jacob’s truck.
And waited.
And waited.
I shot Jacob a text that went unanswered and waited some more.
I sat down on the curb and waited until I could see my breath in the cold night air. And I sent another text asking if everything was alright. But he didn’t respond.
I waited until I was shivering and my eyelids grew heavy.
I pulled out my glasses and glanced at my phone again. Jacob still hadn’t returned my texts. And I’d been sitting outside for over two hours.
I texted him letting him know I was heading home. But that he could come up through the trapdoor so we could talk.
I decided to walk instead of calling an Uber. I let the autumn chill seep into my bones as I walked home. My nose was running and I sniffled. For some reason the sound made my eyes water. I kept my head down in the lobby, but as soon as I was alone in the elevator, I let my tears fall.
I kept shivering even once I was back in my room. I climbed into my bed with my phone in my hand and pulled the covers up to my chin. But I still kept shivering. And I felt my pillow grow wet on the side of my face from my dripping tears.
I should have been somewhere in the middle of nowhere with Jacob right now. Curled up in his arms looking up at the stars.
I sniffled and turned to look up at the glow in the dark star he’d given me.
Normally staring at it in my dark room made me smile.
Tonight it just made it feel like Jacob was really far away.
And I had this sinking feeling that from now on, he’d always be far away.
I pulled the blankets even higher, but I kept shivering.
It was possible that Jacob was busy helping Axel. That he’d lost track of time. That maybe something else had come up.
But it felt a lot more like my boyfriend had just broken up with me.