Chapter 20 – Don’t You Dare
Thursday
“He’s not counting down until Valentine’s Day,” Sophie said as she closed her locker. “Don’t be an idiot.”
“You’ve been hanging out with Parker too much.”
Sophie laughed. “Yeah, maybe. But come on. The Sadie Hawkins dance is next Saturday. If you don’t ask Axel soon, someone else will.”
That was true. But... “I already got rejected once this week. I’m not really up to being rejected again today.”
“But Axel is going to say yes. Because he’s in love with you and has been counting down until your 18th birthday for years for some reason.”
“RJ thinks he’s a serial killer,” I said.
“We all know that’s not true. He’s in love with you. Parker agrees with me.”
“You’re seriously hanging out with Axel’s sister too much.”
Sophie shrugged. “What can I say? I like how she puts RJ in his place. That girl is going places.”
I didn’t disagree. I looked down the hall at where Axel was standing by his locker.
“Do it,” Sophie said. “Do it, do it, do it,” she started chanting.
I slammed my locker closed. “I said I’d do it if we were sure he liked me. And we’re not. Has RJ figured out the beginning of the countdown yet?”
“No, he has some footage to look at or something.”
“What?”
“Just trust his process. And don’t even worry about the countdown. Axel is so into you. Parker and I agree. It’s two to one. So...go.”
“But...”
“He loves you, I know it, Scar.”
She was so sure. It made me feel a little more confident about the whole thing. But I had a terrible fear of being rejected so publicly again. “I think maybe it would be better if I asked him in bed.”
“Very provocative. But no, do it now so I can watch the start of your love story. Pretty please?” She gave me her most encouraging smile. “And look, stupid Jacob just walked away so Axel is all alone. Get in there before another girl swoops in! Operation Sadie Hawkins Dance is a go!”
She really did have a point. And the thought of staying home for the dance knowing Jacob was with Olivia was going to kill me. It would be so much better if I could show up with Axel. Because...it was Axel. Me and Axel. The way I’d always thought it was meant to be.
“Come on, the bell is about to ring in a few minutes. Go before you miss your chance.” Sophie gave me a little push in Axel’s direction.
Axel saw and smiled. He started walking toward me.
I took a deep breath. I guess it was now or never. I met him halfway through the hall.
“Hey,” he said.
“Hey.” My heart was racing so fast. I’d always wanted to ask Axel to the Sadie Hawkins dance. I’d been dreaming of it for years. This was my moment. “So I was thinking.”
“About what exactly? Don’t tell me you and Soph are starting another operation?”
“Actually, yes. Operation Sadie Hawkins Dance.”
Axel laughed. “And what does that involve? Asking your kiss thief to go with you or something?”
This wasn’t a good start. He was basically telling me to ask someone else. Just like Jacob had. “Um...no. Not exactly.”
Axel just stared at me.
“I don’t want to go with Leo. I was wondering if maybe you...” my voice trailed off as I stared into his eyes. “Would you maybe want to go with me, Axel?”
“Oh. Um.” He looked at something over my shoulder like he wanted to be anywhere but stuck in this conversation. “As friends?” he said a little louder than he needed to when I was right in front of him.
Why did everyone I like always just want to be my friend?
“Because that’s all we are,” he said, too loudly again.
“Right.” God, I was so stupid.
“But yeah, sure. We can definitely go as friends. It makes sense for us to go together because we have a vow of singledom and everything. So taking someone else would be a waste of time.”
I had built this up in my head as this whole romantic thing. And I was so freaking wrong.
Axel kept looking over my shoulder.
I turned to see my dad staring at us. I cringed and turned back to Axel. This was mortifying. Even my dad had heard this rejection.
“Maybe Soph can go with us too,” Axel said. “Since she’s single too.”
What?
“It’ll be fun. Just three friends hanging out. A fun group thing. Like usual.”
I didn’t want things to be like usual. Had I not been clear when I’d asked? I thought about what I’d said. No, I’d definitely asked him in a date way. Not in a friendship way. “Actually, maybe just go with Soph.”
“What?”
I felt tears welling in the corners of my eyes. And I prayed they wouldn’t betray me and fall. “You two will have fun together. I didn’t really want to go anyway. I don’t even know why I asked.”
“No, you should definitely come. It’ll be fun.”
I saw Leo walk by on his way to class. Leo who’d never done anything but like me.
Leo who had made it pretty clear on our reveal date thing that he was ready to love me out loud.
No more dark closets. What the hell was I doing asking Axel when I knew he didn’t like me?
And I didn’t want to stay home. I couldn’t.
It would be pathetic. So would showing up in a weird throuple.
I might as well have been dating Luis the Cheater.
“You’re right,” I said. “I do want to go. But I’ll ask someone else. Don’t sweat it.”
“Scarlett...”
I turned and hurried after Leo.
“Pumpkin, are you okay?” my dad asked.
I did not need to have this embarrassing conversation. Yes, I had been brutally rejected. Twice in a row. But third time was a charm. “Mhm, I’m fine.” I stepped past him. “Leo!”
Leo turned around to look at me. He smiled, even though I didn’t deserve one of his smiles after everything.
Something about being rejected so much somehow made my fears diminish. I ran over to him. “Leo, do you want to go to the Sadie Hawkins dance with me?”
“Is this some weird thing where you’re going to agree to go to the dance with me but actually go with Jacob?”
“I deserved that. But, no, Jacob is going with Olivia.”
“Really? The two of you are actually done? I heard that you broke up, but...” He shrugged. “I wasn’t sure what to believe.”
“I’m pretty sure he hates me. It’s done.”
“I’m sure that’s not true.”
“Trust me, it is. I’m a terrible girlfriend.”
“Well, I guess you did go on a date with me while you were dating him.” He smirked.
“Exactly? See? I’m the worst.”
“It is very unclear as it always is when talking to you, if you like me or not. You’re asking me to the dance, but telling me you’re a terrible girlfriend. So...”
“I’m just trying to be honest.”
“Is that what it is? Well, honestly, I find you refreshing. You know how I feel about you.”
“So is that a yes? Will you go to the dance with me?” Please don’t turn me down too. I wasn’t sure I could handle three nos in a row.
Leo smiled. “It’s a date.”
“Yes!”
He laughed.
“Thank you.” I leaned forward and hugged him.
He wrapped his arms around me. “You’re welcome. Although I think I’m kinda the winner here. Now I get to keep up my Leo the Rugged Thief persona.”
I laughed and pulled back. “This is going to be fun.”
“It really is.”
The bell rang.
“I gotta get to class,” I said. “But thank you. I won’t let you down.”
“I have no idea what you’re talking about. Can’t wait.”
I laughed and hurried toward Mr. Halifax’s class. Sophie was standing in the middle of the hall waiting for me.
“What the actual F was that?” Sophie said. “Why would Axel want to go as friends with both of us? I don’t understand. What about the countdown?” She was staring behind me.
I turned around to see Axel push open the front doors of Empire High and walk out even though school was just about to start.
“I don’t know,” I said. “Do you think maybe he has a crush on you?”
“What? No. Ew. I only date older guys. Axel knows that. Something weird is going on. He looked so uncomfortable during that conversation.”
“Because I made him uncomfortable by asking him to the dance.”
“I don’t think that was it. I’ve seen the way he looks at you. Like how Mr. Halifax looks at me.”
“I think you’re much more likely to date Mr. Halifax than I am to ever date Axel. I’m just going to focus on Leo.” Leo had said yes. And that should have been enough to make me happy. But it was like Jacob had stabbed my heart and Axel had ripped it out and stomped on it.
“But Operation Sadie Hawkins Dance.”
“Was a success,” I said. “I got a date.”
“We both know that wasn’t the point of the operation. It was for Axel to wake up.”
“I think he’s awake. I think I’m the one that’s been dreaming.”
Sophie gave me a sad look. “Operation Sadie Hawkins Dance was an utter failure.”
I just shrugged. “Come on, we’re late for class.”
“I hope Mr. Halifax punishes me.”
I laughed and looped my arm through hers.
***
“So...” My dad’s voice trailed off as he drove me home. “You asked Axel to the dance?”
“You don’t have to pretend you didn’t hear the whole conversation.”
My dad drummed his thumbs on the steering wheel. “Did you want him to say yes?”
I stared at him. “No, I asked him because I wanted him to say no.”
My dad didn’t respond. He seemed lost in thought.
I sighed and stared out the windshield. It had started to rain.
The air kept growing colder and colder and I was looking forward to the first snow of the season.
I pressed my lips together. But snow reminded me of drinking hot chocolate at the Caldwell mansion with Jacob, Axel, and Soph.
Maybe I wasn’t looking forward to snow after all.
“I could talk to him for you,” my dad said.
My head snapped back toward him. “Don’t you dare.”
“But, I...”
“Dad, please. It’s embarrassing enough that he said no.”
“He didn’t say no. He said he wanted to go as friends.”
I rolled my eyes. “That is saying no. And it’s fine.
” But it wasn’t fine. I’d had all day to think of how un-fine it was.
I’d already accepted that Axel didn’t like me at homecoming.
But there was this small hope in my chest after Halloween that maybe he’d changed his mind.
He’d shown up when I needed him and gotten me out of the house. We’d had so much fun.
But maybe that’s what friends did. And I’d just read into everything too much again. Like always.
“Fine, hm?” my dad asked.
“Yes. I’m going with Leo instead.”
“Leo?”