Chapter 41
Wes
Watching Bailey let her guard down around her family is the greatest thing I’ve ever seen.
Slowly but surely throughout the day, she seems to get lighter and lighter.
I just watch, not involving myself too much because I don’t have anything to add to the conversations.
I’m just here for Bailey. Watching her be like this with her family after she was so worried makes me feel so much better about coming.
I think of the alternative where I would’ve been alone in my house with Bruno, not doing anything. Maybe I could’ve gone to the animal shelter. Those dogs still need attention, even on the holidays. Once we’re back, I’ll make sure to bring treats to spoil them.
Even though I’m not used to being around so many people at one time, I manage to feel good around this group.
Brent and Bailey are similar in how quiet they are, always observing everyone.
Brynn is a lot more outspoken than they are and so is her husband.
Though I can see how the rest of the guys didn’t get along with him.
The day is mostly peaceful, and it’s the best Christmas I’ve had since I was a kid.
I try to fight off the memories of my own family, of what it was like when my parents were still around.
Of the happy house we had, and then what it was like after my dad died.
My mom still tried, she really did, but it was never the same.
Then I was grown and out of the house and before I knew it, she was gone, too.
It’s just been me ever since. So being here with this large family is foreign, but not entirely awful like I would’ve thought it would be.
I think I’ve got Bailey to thank for that. I know she was scared to see her family after so long. I know there are things I don’t know about their history, but from what I’ve seen none of that even matters.
“She seems like she’s doing well,” Brent says quietly while everyone else is talking.
“She is.” I nod.
“Thanks for being there for her, I know she’s a stubborn one.”
I huff a small laugh. “Yeah she is.”
“Wait. Did you say the bird talks?” Chandler tries to clarify after Bailey tells them about life in Amity.
“Yeah. Jerry Lee, he says some wild shit.” She looks wide eyed at Evie who’s still preoccupied with her toys, but corrects herself. “Stuff. Anyway, he’s wild and Lily has started teaching him more things she probably shouldn’t.”
“Lily sounds like my kind of girl.” Brynn smiles. “Brent, you should get a bird.”
“Absolutely not. We’re about to have two little girls around here. You get a bird.”
“No can do, big bro. I’m about to have two little somethings running around of my own. Well, I guess mine won’t be running for a while.” Brynn smiles down at her still mostly flat stomach, and pats it lightly.
I’ve never wanted kids. But the way her husband places his hand over hers, the love in their eyes as they talk about the future has the piece of stone in my chest where a heart used to be crumbling as it starts to feel things.
“I got a dog,” Bailey blurts.
“Aw, I would love a dog.” Brynn looks like she may start crying again. “What kind?”
“She’s a Golden mix and her name is Sadie.” Bailey smiles talking about her new friend and I can’t help but smile with her.
“Next time, you should bring her.” Brynn’s face dims slightly, “I mean, if you plan to come back again.”
Bailey’s shoulders drop, and I can feel her guilt from here. “I will. I promise.”
“I don’t know about the rest of you, but I want some pie,” Matt announces, breaking the simmering tension.
“What pie?” Brent questions.
“The one Chandler made last night when she couldn’t sleep because the future hockey player she’s growing wouldn’t stop kicking,” Matt explains.
Brent looks at Chandler. “You could’ve asked for help.”
“Sleeping? I don’t think there’s anything you could have done to help.” Chandler chuckles.
“Don’t start being gross.” Brynn grimaces.
“How is that being gross?” Brent asks.
“It was only a matter of time.” Brynn glares at her brother who just shakes his head.
Matt ends up bringing out the pie. There’s a small altercation about him not serving everyone. Afterwards, they all end up migrating to the kitchen while Bailey and I hang back for a couple extra minutes.
“I got you a present too, but I wanted to give it to you in private,” I tell her.
“If it’s some sort of sex toy, you should wait until we’re back home.”
“It’s not.” I shake my head. “I’m not some deviant, you know?”
Bailey gives me a look that reads like, “are you sure?”
I stand up, yanking her with me so our chests collapse. “Don’t be a brat. I’m no stranger to pulling you into a bathroom or closet to punish you.”
Her breath catches, and I almost think she’s going to tempt me even more when her name is called from the kitchen.
“Guess you’ll have to hold out on that punishment until later.” She winks, walking ahead of me into the kitchen.
I rub my chest, watching her go and thinking about how wild it is, how far we’ve come from where we were just a few months ago. About how I should be afraid of how close we’ve gotten. And yet, all I can think about is how I don’t want it to end.
When I offered to come here with Bailey, I didn’t expect it to be so easy. I figured there would be family drama to sort out, and while I’m sure she does have some things to talk to her siblings about, it’s been simple and fun. Which is something I never expected.
Christmas began with presents and ended with all of us sitting in the outdoor covered patio. There’s a small fire going for warmth, but we still need blankets. Which is how Bailey and I got cuddled together under a large blanket surrounded by these people who were just strangers to me yesterday.
“You guys should stay until after New Years,” Brynn suggests during a lull in conversation.
Bailey shakes her head, her hair grazing me with the movement. “No, we have to get back before then. I don’t want Jameson and Sutton stuck with the dogs for that long.”
“Come on, please?” Brynn purses her bottom lip in a pout.
“If they can’t stay, they can’t stay,” Brent says, pointedly.
“Sorry, forgot Captain Buzzkill was still here.”
I lean down to whisper to Bailey, “If you want to stay, we can always ask.”
She turns her head toward me. “I’m sure you want to get back, too.”
“Get back to what? You’re here.”
She sucks in a gasp as her eyes go wide, and I pull her against me even tighter.
“Well you guys think about that, but I’m exhausted.” Brynn starts to stand up, stretching her arms up, and Colton follows.
“Yeah, I’m pretty tired too,” Bailey agrees.
I fold the blanket we were using before setting it on the bench seat we were just on as Brynn pulls her sister in for a long hug. I take my time, letting them have their moment before we turn in for the night.
Bailey decides to take a shower. While I’m tempted to join her, I also want to get the present I got for her out of my bag and try to make it special.
I’m not a romantic guy, and never have been.
I don’t even know if I’m doing it right, or if she will even like this.
I spend the several minutes she’s in the bathroom arguing with myself that this is a bad idea, and to just return it.
Or throw it away. She never has to know, I’m sure she forgot about me saying I had something for her.
Or I can say I actually forgot it.
It was something I ordered last week, and even at the time I wasn’t sure if I would end up giving it to her. That uncertain feeling is only amplified knowing she’s just in the other room and bound to come back in here any minute.
I’m holding the black box that holds the necklace inside of it as I bounce it between my hands, continuing to debate even as I hear the shower turn off.
My time is running out to make a decision, but as I’m walking toward my duffel to put it away and forget the whole thing the bathroom door swings open.
Bailey is wearing a T-shirt like she always does when she goes to sleep, but I notice this time it’s not one of hers. It’s mine.
Mine.
I look down at the box, and it solidifies my decision to give it to her. Even if it backfires, if she hates it or freaks out. I have to throw caution to the wind for once, and just do it.
Her hair is damp, falling around her shoulders as she narrows her eyes at me, probably seeing my internal battle even as I try to mask it. Her eyes drop to my hands. “What’s that?”
I look at the box, stepping closer to her. “It’s your Christmas present.”
“I really wish you wouldn’t have gotten me anything. I already feel bad enough that I didn’t bring presents for anyone else.”
“You don’t need to get me anything,” I insist, leading her to the bed and sitting next to her on the foot of it.
Handing over the box as soon as her fingers graze mine, I know there’s no going back. She hesitates opening it, and I just watch, waiting to see how she’s going to react.
I’m watching her face as she lifts the lid to reveal the thin chain necklace with a circle in the middle that has beads on it that represent a message in morse code. The gold represents the dashes, and the black represents the dots.
The colors of a sunflower.
-- .. -. .
Mine.
I gauge her reaction, waiting to see if this was a bad idea, or too far. Her mouth is open slightly, but she hasn’t looked at me yet. Her fingers trace the tiny beads along the circle, and she finally speaks. “This is beautiful.”
“Remind you of anything?”
She nods, turning toward me. “I don’t want to say what because you told me if I say it, this stops.”
The side of my lips quirk in a small smile. She doesn’t want to say the safe word because she doesn’t want this to stop. That thought alone makes me happier than it probably should.
“It’s a message in morse code.”
“What is it?
“It says ‘mine.’”
She lunges at me, wrapping her arms around my neck, crashing her mouth onto mine. I wrap my arms around her back, pulling her to straddle my lap. I groan against her mouth, pushing my tongue in roughly, wanting to taste her, feel her. Love her.
I freeze for a second at the realization, but quickly pull her tighter against me and kiss her even harder. She moans, rubbing herself against me. I’m already hard for her and I know she can feel it.
When she whispers two words against my mouth, I lose all sense of myself because I’ve already lost myself to her, but her whispered words make it official.
“I’m yours.”