24. Scared shitless
Chapter 24
Scared shitless
Luca
I sit next to Ariana, holding her hand, watching her fall asleep.
I was about two seconds away from calling 911 in the basement before she finally took that breath. Her eyes were wild, her lips were turning blue, and her skin was paler than I’d ever seen it. It was the single most frightening moment of my life.
I walked away after our kiss because I was afraid I’d hurt her. But in doing so, I hurt her more. And after seeing what I just saw, I’m making it my mission to never hurt her again. My girl has enough demons. She needs more warriors.
Ariana means everything to me, and I’m not worthy of her. I want her to be proud of me. Proud to call me hers and proud to be mine.
It takes hours to convince myself she’s okay. I listen to her breathing the whole time, simply thankful for it.
I wake up sitting there on the floor, her hand still in mine, my head on the mattress next to hers as she sleeps. The sun is just beginning to rise.
Gently, I pull my hand away and quietly leave the room. I clean up all evidence of vomit and the mess the girls left in the bowling alley.
I should be tired since I only slept for a few hours, and in an awkward position, but I’m not. I change clothes and hit the gym for a couple of hours. By the time I take a shower, the house is up and running for breakfast.
“Omelet, Luca?” Becca asks when I enter the kitchen.
“Of course. Ham and cheese if you’ve got it.” I grab a coffee mug down and fill it before looking at it. It says, ‘World’s Best Farter’ in big letters. I grin and walk to the table, where Lil and Ariana sit drinking their coffee out of their own ridiculous mugs, waiting for their omelets with sunglasses on their faces. I hold the mug up as they look at me. “Let me guess, Father’s Day present for Marco.”
“Nope. Birthday. Mom.” Lil picks up her mug and turns it to show me the picture of her and Ariana with the words ‘Luckiest Fucking Dad’ on it. “This one was for Father’s Day.”
Ariana’s avoiding my gaze. As much as I love that she has someone like Lil by her side, it’s also a pain in my ass that Lil is always by her side because I need to talk to her.
I chuckle as I take a seat. “Where are Marco and Mia?”
“Probably doing the mid-morning nasty.” Ariana laughs when Lil throws a napkin at her. “Lil likes to pretend she was delivered by storks and that they don’t do that kind of thing pretty much every chance they get.”
“Ew. Gross. Shut up.” She puts her fingers in her ears while Ariana grins.
“Oh Jesus, what’s Lil pretending not to hear now?” Mia asks as she and Marco walk in.
“Oh, Jesus is right,” Ariana says. Her eyes meet mine for a moment, and her cheeks turn pink. Yeah, she must remember at least part of last night. “She doesn’t like to be reminded that she wasn’t an immaculate conception story.”
Marco snorts and pulls a chair out for Mia. “No. Not at all.”
Lil groans, her fingers not working as earplugs.
“Breakfast is ready,” Becca calls to us from the kitchen. I jump up to help her bring plates in.
“Holy fuck, who ordered this monstrosity?” Gooey cheese oozes all over the plate.
“That’s a stupid question,” Lil snorts and points at Ariana, who simply shrugs.
“Omelets need cheese.”
“And how many kinds are in this one?”
“Four.” She grins but still doesn’t look directly at me. God, I love that beautiful grin. I want to see it every single day.
After breakfast, Marco has me to join him in his office to talk about the fighting ring he has connections to here.
He lets me stay while he discusses other business with the crew. When the last of them leave, he turns to me. “So, what exactly has you so distracted?”
Fuck, I thought I was doing a pretty good job of paying attention. “What do you mean?”
“You’re mostly here, but there’s something else that’s got your focus.”
I know the guilt shows on my face, but he laughs. “It’s not necessarily a bad thing, Luca. Depending on what it is, it can be a good thing. My girls, all three of them, are always part of my focus. When you got here two weeks ago, your focus was basically anger. But that’s changed.”
He waits expectantly. I don’t know how he’s going to react. But he’s not going to let me get away without an answer, and lying doesn’t seem like a smart way to go.
Finally, I exhale loudly. “It’s Ariana.”
He grins widely. “We thought so.”
What. The. Fuck? “We?”
“Me and Mia.”
“Fuck.” I lean my head back and stare at the ceiling. He chuckles. I’m glad I’m getting to know this Marco, this other side of the scary, badass mafia boss. He always scared the shit out of me when he came to my house to deal with business, but he was fun to do stuff with at the lake when I was a kid.
“You look at her like I look at Mia, at least when you think no one is watching. You have since the second we pulled up to the back of that theater.”
“I don’t know what to do with the way she makes me feel.” Absentmindedly, I rub a hand over my chest.
“How does she make you feel?”
“Like there’s fucking sunshine in the world.”
“What’s not to like about that?” Marco asks.
I sigh. “Nothing. It’s the best fucking feeling in the world. It’s just…” I’ve been holding it in for two weeks, which is somehow a blink and also forever at the same time. “She’s everything, Marco. She’s funny and brave and weird and beautiful and a little bit scary. And I’ll never deserve her.” The word vomit pours out of me.
“Mia and I, we’ve been together for over twenty years. Not a single day has gone by where I felt good enough for that woman. But when you find the one woman who sets your soul on fire and reminds you that you actually have a heart, you hold on to her. Even if you don’t deserve her. Especially if you don’t deserve her. You just try to be worthy of her every day and be thankful that she allows you the opportunity to be in her presence.”
We sit in silence while I take in his words and let myself start to hope a little.
“But Luca,” the tone of his voice makes me look away from the ceiling and at him, “if you hurt my little girl, I won’t hesitate in killing you.”
I believe him.
“If I ever hurt her, I’d string myself up in the shed and let you.”
After threatening my life, Marco walks over to clap me on the shoulder with a smile. “Let’s go see what everyone is up to.”
Marco grabs a couple of beers and asks Becca where the girls are. She points to the back door and then hands me a tray of drinks and sandwiches with a smile.
Mia and Lil are in the pool while Ariana’s on a lounger. She’s wearing a green one-piece suit that’s fucking perfection on her, sunglasses, and a wide-brimmed hat low on her head. High up on her right thigh is a tattoo I don’t remember seeing before. ‘Chaos demon’ is pretty fucking accurate, though.
“Come on, get in this pool!” Lil sends a small splash of water Ariana’s way.
“That’d be a big fat nope.” She pops the p at the end of the word.
“Enough with the sulking for today, Ari,” Lil declares.
“I’m not sulking. I’m brooding.”
“DeVilles don’t brood,” Marco declares as we walk up. He puts our beers down on a large table, and I do the same with the food.
“Lies. Luca does it all the time. And I looked at the rulebook. Brooding is allowed on occasion. Therefore, today, I brood. ”
“Like you read a rule book.” Marco bends down and picks her up in his arms like I did last night.
“Dad, no! You’re going to hurt your back!”
“Oh shut up, I’m fine,” he says as he turns toward the pool.
“Marco Alexander DeVille, don’t you dare!”
He stalks the few steps to the water and sends her flying. “Mother Fu—!” She disappears under the water with a huge splash. “—Cker!” She comes back up, sputtering and shooting daggers at Marco, who lets out the first belly laugh I’ve ever heard from him.
Lil is cackling, so Ariana splashes water at her face and right into her mouth.
“Direct hit!” Ariana laughs and then squeals as Lil lunges at her.
“Oh shit.” Mia starts to climb out of the pool, and Marco is right there to help her. The girls try to drown each other for a few minutes until Mia calls for peace.
“Ah, Mom, come on. You’re no fun.” Lil pouts.
“Don’t listen to her. You’re lots of fun, love.” Marco’s eyes sparkle with mischief as he kisses his wife’s hand.
“Barf. Dad, help us out. I see food!” Lil says as she and Ariana wait by the side of the pool, their hands out.
Marco smirks. “No, I’m not falling for that again.” He and Mia walk to the table.
“Boo. You’re no fun, either.”
“I beg to differ.” Mia grins at her husband. Lil groans, and Ariana chuckles. Then Ariana dunks Lil’s head back under the water and swims away to the stairs before Lil comes up for air.
“I’m going to get you back for that, Ariana Ray.”
“You can try, Lilith May.” Watching Ariana step out of the pool is like a slow-motion scene from an old Baywatch episode. I groan silently as I sit quickly, trying to hide just how much I like it .
“Are you two sure you don’t want to invite more kids from your classes to the party? You only invited the girls you’ve known since high school,” Mia says as the girls join us.
A little smirk appears on Ariana’s face.“We don’t like anyone else there, Mom. And no one else likes us.”
Mia scoffs. “Who wouldn’t love you girls?”
“What, like a list? Ohhhh, we should make a list!!!” Lil claps her hands.
“We did once. I bet it’s longer now.” Ariana muses. “We’ve pissed off more people since then.”