Chapter 14
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
Sasha
Two hours later I realized just how wrong I was. I didn’t like Jeanne at all. In fact, I hated her.
I’d thought the therapists at the rehab clinic were tough, but they had nothing on this woman. She was a straight up slave driver. In fact, I think her only redeeming quality was the magic she had in her hands now that we were done with all the exercises. My muscles were alternately screaming in protest from the overuse and mewling in appreciation over the soothing sensation as she rubbed them down.
“Who’s ready for another round of margaritas?” Meg asked, carrying a tray of freshly made drinks into my room.
“Me,” I groaned into the table. “I’m exhausted.”
“You did great though. Everything is healing up so well.” Jeanne said as she removed the electrodes from my back and finished up our session.
I glared at the medic. “Is that why it hurts so much?”
She smiled sympathetically. “Healing is a process, and I’m sure you understand by now that a certain amount of pain is to be expected. Not all pain is bad, and in your case, this kind is a very good sign.”
“Eww, pain. It’s time to make that go away. Hence, why I made more margaritas.” Meg stopped in front of me and held out one of the drinks to me. I sat up enough to accept it and take a healthy drink. My lips puckered against the strong tequila as I handed the drink back to her.
“Good God, Meg. How much alcohol did you put in those?” She’d gotten a lot more heavy handed since the first round.
She laughed. “Just the right amount. Here, you need one too.” She passed one to Jeanne who looked hesitant to take it.
“Am I going to be able to drive home if I drink this?”
“Eventually,” Meg cooed. “I ordered some food to go with the next round. When that gets here we’ll all be right as rain. And if you can’t drive home, there will be plenty of volunteers to give you a ride if you want it.” She wagged her eyebrows at us.
I ignored Meg’s double meaning and hoped that Jeanne did too. “Where’d you order food from?” I asked, slowly moving to a sitting position now that Jeanne had ended her torture session. “Are we getting Mexican?” As much as I probably needed to be more careful these days with my diet, and how much weight I’d gained, I had a serious weakness for guac and chips.
“I called down to the clubhouse and talked to Bear. He said he’d take care of it. I would imagine by now he knows exactly what you like.”
My eyebrows raised a moment before my eyes narrowed. “What is that supposed to mean?”
Meg laughed. “Oh don’t go getting into a twist. I’m not accusing you of anything. But we’re not blind and neither are you. Bear spent all his extra time with you at the hospital and from what I saw, he waits on you hand and foot. All I’m saying is that you’ve got that man wrapped is all and it’s pretty freaking adorable.”
I nearly choked on the next sip of my drink I was in the middle of swallowing when Meg dropped that bomb.
“First of all, that’s ridiculous. We were in the hospital together and rehab. It created a bond of—friendship.”
My friend smirked and even Jeanne, who I assumed didn’t even know anything about Bear, looked away and began gathering all of her supplies.
“Keep telling yourself that, honey and we’ll have to nickname you the queen of denial. From what I can tell you’ve got two men in this club wrapped up in you, which I’d say leaves you in quite the pickle.”
“I think I should go,” Jeanne interrupted. “Before this day gets any weirder.”
“Nonsense.” Meg whirled. “You have to excuse me. Tequila loosens my lips. Plus, I’m just teasing Sasha. Everyone here loves her, including me.”
Her words gave me a warm feeling in my chest, but it wasn’t enough to wipe away the worry now burrowed there from what she’d said before. Bear and I were friends. And JD and I were even less. I hardly had anyone wrapped up in me. Unless you counted the obvious guilt JD was dealing with over what happened. That man insisted on carrying the weight of the world on his shoulders and one day it was going to take him down if he wasn’t careful.
He used that responsibility to push me away every single day and honestly, I was feeling a little too tired to deal with all of that today.
“Yes, you must stay. We make the best margaritas and it would be criminal to pass up tacos from Pablo’s. He’s got the best food truck in all of Washington.”
“You say that like you know that’s what Bear will bring. He might surprise you with something from the grocery deli.”
I wrinkled up my nose. “That’s a disgusting thought. Why would you even put that out in the world.” I shook my head. “No way. Trust me, he’ll bring us Pablo’s. I got him hooked on the tacos while we were in the hospital and he was making prospects bring them to us every week for Taco Tuesday.”
Meg laughed again. “See! Hooked.”
I ignored her this time, refusing to rise to the bait and kept my focus on Jeanne for now. “So, you’ll stay?”
“Honestly I shouldn’t, but who the hell can pass up tacos and margaritas?”
We all laughed. “Not me, that’s for sure.” God it felt good to laugh again. And hang with friends. Jeanne was new, but I could tell already she would fit in and make a great addition to our group. If nothing else, we club girls had to stick together. “I’m going to get cleaned up before the food gets here. If you need anything from the kitchen like plates and silverware, you should have no problem finding them in the cabinet above the dishwasher. JD keeps this place fairly bare bones, but the kitchen is surprisingly well stocked and he said to use whatever.”
Meg shot me a look over her shoulder as she led Jeanne from my room. Luckily she kept her thoughts to herself, although the meaning of that look she gave was clear. She really did believe I had JD on some sort of hook. If she only knew how far from the truth that actually was.
I took my time in the shower, appreciating the warmth of the water sluicing over my naked body, and the scent of JD’s shower gel as I rubbed it all over my skin. It probably wasn’t anything special he picked out for himself, but the outdoor woodsy smell would forever be the scent I associated with him.
Stepping out of the shower, I quickly dried off and turned to the mirror. From this angle, I could almost forget about the permanent damage my body sustained in the explosion. Not that I actually would, but it was nice to look in the mirror without having to see the trauma as a constant reminder.
However, my body had changed during the past several weeks. My hips were wider, and my stomach had developed a small pooch that wasn’t there before. Hospital nutrition left a lot to be desired. They were only concerned about the body getting enough calories to encourage recovery, and not whether it was going to make me gain weight.
From now on I would have to take more control in the food I ate. Having the kitchen in the clubhouse to cook my meals was certainly convenient, but the foods the men liked to eat also weren’t exactly healthy. Meat and potatoes went great with beer and whiskey, not so much with my thighs and hips.
Leaving the bathroom, I grabbed a fresh pair of yoga pants and matching loose shirt. At some point, I’d probably want to wear something besides stretchy pants and that definitely meant either a weight loss or a shopping trip. The jeans I’d worn home from the hospital had been so tight and uncomfortable, I’d ripped them off the minute I could.
“You okay in here?” Meg popped her head into my room just as I finished dressing.
“Yep. Just finishing up. What’s up?”
“Bear is here with the food. You were right about Pablo’s.”
“Yes!” I smiled and pumped my fist in the air. Not only did I enjoy being right, but I was so ready for a Pablo taco with my next margarita. The diet could wait one more day.
“I thought I should give you a head’s up before you make an appearance. He also might have brought a few extra people with him.”
“Oh boy. Is JD here too?”
She shook her head. “Not here and no one’s mentioned where he might be.”
I pressed my lips together, forcing my mind away from dangerous territory. “I’m not sure an impromptu party in his cabin is a great idea. I guess I should text him and make sure it’s okay.”
Meg nodded. “Agreed. JD is usually pretty flexible with what goes on around the compound, but in his own home might be a different story.”
I scooped up my phone and typed a quick text, asking if it was okay that I’d invited a few people over. I stared down at the screen waiting for the little dots to show up and let me know he was writing me back. When nothing appeared, a little more of that anxiety I was holding onto seeped back into my mind. What could he be doing that would keep him from looking at his phone?
“Is JD still on the compound?”
Meg lifted her shoulders. “I’m not sure. You could ask one of the guys in the living room and they might know.”
“I don’t want to go that far. I’m just curious. He’s usually good at getting right back to me.”
“Well, bring your phone with you and hopefully he’ll respond soon. In the meantime, you might as well enjoy some lunch before those brutes out there eat it all.”
I laughed, shoving my phone into the side pocket of my leggings. “Oh that is so not happening. Those boys DO NOT want to get in the way of me and my Pablo’s tacos.”
We exited my room laughing and joined the small crowd in the living room. Bear and Cash were sitting on the couch with trays of food in front of them with their gazes locked on the big screen where some kind of race was taking place. Bear was a huge Nascar fan and I’d watched many races with him while in the hospital. I hadn’t minded though because it seemed only fair. He sat through hours and hours of rom com movies and more reality television than anyone should have to watch.
“Hey, babe,” Bear called.
“Hey, yourself,” I returned, walking over to him and placing a kiss on his cheek. “Did I hear you brought tacos?”
“I figured you were probably due. Plus, I know how well they go with your margaritas.” I smiled, making sure not to make eye contact with Meg who was bound to give me an I told you so look. I still didn’t see the big deal about any of this. Friends learn things about each other. I, for example, know that Bear doesn’t care much for a vegetable and hates watching television shows or movies with zombies in them because they freak him the fuck out like clowns do for other people.
“Speaking of margaritas…” Meg said as she wandered into the kitchen and took up her spot in front of the blender.
I bit my lips to keep from laughing. She was such a pain in my ass, but I loved her anyways. Looking around the room, I loved being able to call these people my friends. But a pallor of sadness still fell over my heart. If I couldn’t find a new place here that didn’t include the use of my mangled body, then I would have to move on.
And I didn’t have a single idea of where I would go or what would come next in my life. For the first time ever, I felt like I had roots and the idea of ripping them up and starting over again made me angry all over again.
There had to be something I could do…