Chapter 15
Zane
“I got you something.” I set the Bible down in front of Tessa, then slide into the booth across from where she’s sitting.
She stares at it as though it’s going to jump toward her. “What’s this for?”
“You.”
“I heard you. But why?”
“Because you don’t seem to have one anymore.”
Tessa’s hands remain firmly clasped in her lap. “What made you think I want one?” Her voice is barely above a whisper. Shoulders slumped, she doesn’t look like a thirty-six-year-old woman.
Instead, all I can see right now is that terrified teenage girl I’d first met.
Has she truly regressed that far? How can I make her see what I do when I look at her?
“If you don’t want to read it, then don’t. But no matter what happened to you, Tessa, the Lord never left you.”
She closes her eyes and shakes her head. “You don’t understand. The things I did.”
“I’ve been there, too. And I found my way back.”
Tessa’s gorgeous dark eyes open, and she stares back at me. “There’s no way you would have done anything close to what I did.”
“Sin is sin, Tessa. But I’m starting to think you are holding onto the view you had of me when we were teenagers.”
“What view is that?”
“You once called me the Golden Boy of Stormwatch Landing.”
She smirks, but it fades. “Sin may be sin, but I’ve—” She trails off.
“You don’t owe me an explanation, Tessa.”
“You need to know who you’re protecting, though. Who you’re risking your life for.”
“I already know.”
She shakes her head.
“You’re Tessa Lane, an imperfect daughter of the King. You love Brussels sprouts, pineapple on pizza, and cheesy rom coms, but dislike scary movies, when people put marshmallows on top of sweet potatoes, and small spaces.”
A tear slips down her cheek. “It’s not that simple anymore.”
“It is that simple, Tessa. Jesus died for every sin you committed and every sin you will commit. All you have to do is repent and believe in Him.”
“I don’t know what I believe in anymore.”
“Then start here.” I gently push the Bible toward her. “And find your way home.”
She closes her eyes, and more tears fall. Even though I’m not sure she wants me to, I get up and slide into the booth beside her. She’s all the way near the wall, so we’re not quite touching, but when she doesn’t pull away or shove me off the side, I move a little closer.
I’d prayed this morning. Harder than I’ve ever prayed, that He would use me to bring her back to Him. Even if that’s all my purpose is in this life, I can die a happy man knowing that Tessa realized just how much she’s worth.
That she found her way back to Him.
Because I know she won’t do it herself, I open the Bible and turn to Psalm 139.
“O Lord, You have examined my heart and know everything about me. You know when I sit down or stand up. You know my thoughts even when I’m far away. You see me when I travel and when I rest at home. You know everything I do.”
Tessa swallows hard, her eyes still closed, but tears continue to stream freely down her cheeks.
I keep reading, “You know what I am going to say even before I say it, Lord. You go before me and follow me. You place Your hand of blessing on my head. Such knowledge is too wonderful for me, too great for me to understand. I can never escape from Your Spirit. I can never get away from Your presence.”
She leans toward me, so I wrap an arm around her shoulders and hold on, basking in this moment where her walls are down. Where she’s seeking comfort in my arms.
“If I go up to heaven, You are there; if I go down to the grave, You are there. If I ride the wings of morning, if I dwell by the farthest oceans, even there Your hand will guide me, and Your strength will support me. I could ask the darkness to hide me and the light around me to become night—but even in the darkness, I cannot hide from You.”
My throat tightens, and I swallow hard, hoping to push the lump aside so I can continue.
“To You the night shines as bright as day. Darkness and light are the same to You. You made all the delicate, inner parts of my body and knit me together in my mother’s womb.
Thank You for making me so wonderfully complex.
Your workmanship is marvelous—how well I know it.
You watched me as I was being formed in utter seclusion, as I was woven together in the dark of the womb.
You saw me before I was born. Every day of my life was recorded in Your book. ”
I clear my throat again, and Tessa remains where she is, her shoulders shaking softly as she cries. It’s not a complete break, but the fissures are there. Only God can fully remove those walls she’s built, and I pray He does.
“He has always been with you, Tessa,” I say again.
“He gave me a second chance, and I threw it away.”
“We all do. There’s not a single person who walks this world and doesn’t sin. Just because You accept Jesus doesn’t mean you’re perfect. Only He is.”
“I’ve hurt so many people. I’ve done so many things I can’t take back.”
“But you can move forward. You don’t have to live in the past.”
“Well, when it’s literally trying to kill me, I’m not so sure about that.” She straightens and wipes her eyes, so I reluctantly remove my arm from around her shoulders and turn slightly to face her.
“You let me worry about that.”
She looks up at me, and in her eyes, I see a bit of the light that once shone so brightly. “Will you keep reading?”
“Absolutely.”
Soft creaking pulls me out of sleep, but I don’t open my eyes. Keeping my breathing steady, I listen for the source of the sound. Footsteps. The door leading into my cabin slides open, meaning someone picked the lock.
Moving slowly, I slide my hand beneath the pillow and retrieve my gun. Then I wait. Footsteps move farther inside the cabin of my boat.
Nearly there.
A shadow passes over the top of me, so I lunge up, bringing my gun with me. An arm comes down on top of mine, knocking it free. Pain radiates up through my arm as I slam my fist into the masked assailant.
He stumbles backward, falling against and splintering my door.
Loud enough that I know it will have woken Tessa.
I can’t see his face due to the mask, but he withdraws a knife and snarls at me. “You have no idea what you’re up against, SEAL.”
“I know that you’re not walking off this boat.” I square off, ready to end his life if it comes down to it. “And that’s enough right now.”
The man charges forward, slashing out with his knife.
I move to the side, but because of the small space, it slices into my arm.
Pain radiates from the source of the wound, but I ignore it as I turn to the side and slam my bare foot into his chest. He falls back, so I rush forward, gripping the arm that’s holding the knife and slamming him to the deck of my boat.
I keep a firm hold on his arm as he thrashes beneath me.
A bullet whizzes past my head and hits the bench seat just to my right.
Two attackers. Keeping myself as hidden as I can, I grip the throat of the man beneath me and squeeze.
He thrashes, arching up to put me in the line of sight for his partner, but I remain low.
“Zane!” Tessa screams.
“Stay out of sight!” I yell. “Get inside! Lock the door!”
Something slams into the back of my head, knocking me to the side. Three attackers. I’m dazed, spots in my vision, but I don’t stay down long.
Gripping the knife that the man on the deck dropped, I rush back toward the cabin.
Tessa screams, and my blood runs cold.
She’s back against the wall, a masked assailant pinning her there. She fights for breath as his hands tighten around her throat.
Red invades my thoughts, and a fury unlike anything I’ve ever felt consumes me.
I rush forward and drive the blade down into the side of his neck as I wrap an arm around him and yank him backward. He falls back, so I wrap both legs around him, pinning him to my body as he jerks to break free.
Warmth trickles down my hand, sliding over me.
My stomach twists as bile burns, but I don’t relent.
He jerks, fighting against me, but I remain where I am until he falls still. Tossing him to the side, I search for Tessa. She’s curled in the corner, her hands on her throat. Her eyes are wide and full of tears, but she’s alive.
Breathing.
Immediate threat neutralized, I rush back onto the deck of my boat. The man who’d initially attacked me is gone, and since no one takes another shot at me, I can assume that—at least for the moment—we’re in the clear.
Heading back inside, I grab my cell phone from the counter and call 9-1-1.
“What’s your emergency?” Lynette, the local dispatcher, asks. Her voice is one I recognize easily since she’s close friends with my mom.
“It’s Zane Knox. I was just attacked on my boat. A shooter and two others. One is down; the others are gone.”
“Your boat is in the marina? Normal spot?”
“Yes.” Breathless, I brace one hand on the counter and stare out the door. “I don’t know if they’re going to be gone for long.”
“I’m sending help right now.”
“Thank you.” I end the call but keep the phone in my hand as I turn and sink to the ground beside the man who’d attacked Tessa. Using two fingers, I feel for a pulse, but I’m not surprised when I find none.
“Is he dead?”
“Yes.” Setting the knife aside, I retrieve the gun I’d dropped and crawl over in front of her. Since I don’t want to risk our shadows from turning on the lights, I turn on the flashlight on my phone and study the red marks on her throat. “Are you okay?”
She nods. Her gaze leaves my face and fixates on my arm before it widens. “You’re bleeding!”
I study the gash in my arm. It’s decent-sized, but not fatal. “I’ll be fine.”
“We need to put pressure on it.” She starts to push up from the floor, but I yank her back down.
“You have to stay out of sight.”
Her gaze lifts from me to the towel hanging on the front of my small oven. She reaches up and pulls it down, then presses it to my injury. Pain shoots up from the pressure, but I don’t make a sound.
Sirens wail outside, and flashing red and blue signifies we’re no longer alone, so I flip on the lights.
“Are you okay?” she asks.
I nod even as my gaze drops to the dead man on the floor of my boat. It’s not the first life I’ve been forced to take, but that doesn’t make it any easier.
Lord, please forgive me.