17. Charlotte
CHAPTER SEVENTEEN
Charlotte
River walked me backward toward the cabin. We were a whirlwind of deep, urgent kisses, hands gripping each other’s clothes. I lifted the back of River’s shirt and slid beneath to touch the broad, warm expanse of his back.
Then he must have lost patience, because he lifted me by the hips and carried me, our lips still locked.
Somehow, we got through the door and inside. He didn’t bother to close it, and yellow sunshine followed us in. The sweet, grassy smell of the air, mixing with the masculine scent of him. All of it so overwhelming.
“What are we doing?” I asked.
River set me on my feet and kissed his way down my jaw to my neck. “Whatever we want.”
Shudders of desire raced down to my toes and back again. “And nobody has to know.”
“I’m not gonna tell them.” He sucked at the skin below my ear. “At this moment, nothing exists but us.”
Avoiding reality . It really was a great strategy. I wanted River, no matter how unwise it was. Regardless of the chaos and danger we’d temporarily escaped from. None of that mattered .
This man had a way of bringing out the impulsive, reckless side of me. And it felt good . Liberating.
I grabbed the edge of my shirt to lift it up, but River stopped me. His lips were wet, eyes hooded. “Slow down. I’ve waited a long time for this.”
And who knows if the first time will be the last , I thought.
He was probably thinking the same, but neither of us said it. I just nodded.
“Tell me what to do,” I breathed.
His eyebrow quirked. “Oh yeah? You’re finally going to listen to me?”
“Unless you annoy me too much.”
River’s smile was brilliant. “Trust me, I know what a gift you’re giving me. Let me savor it.” He dipped forward for another deep kiss. “I plan to worship you.”
I whimpered. “I’m okay with that.”
“Then lie down on the bed for me.”
I’d already toed off my shoes when we got inside. I pulled off my socks, crawled onto the mattress, and spun around to face him, lying back against the pillows.
River stood at the edge of the bed, just looking down at me. I still wore the tee and jeans that belonged to Hodge’s sister. My hair hadn’t seen product or a blow dryer since long before my last shower. Yet with the way River was devouring me with his eyes, and the responding pulses of arousal flooding my veins, I’d never felt sexier.
I hadn’t felt this kind of wild, breathless craving since I was sixteen. Back when things had almost been simple between us.
He went to the side of the bed and sat next to my hip. His fingers caressed the sliver of skin where my shirt had ridden up. Then he pushed the shirt up further to expose part of my ribcage .
I gasped when River bent over to kiss my stomach. Again when his tongue circled my belly button.
He kept touching and caressing, eyes roving as he slowly uncovered more of me. Pushing my shirt up over my bra, unbuttoning and unzipping my jeans.
“I’m going to take these off,” he said. I nodded, and he eased the denim over my hips and down my legs. He made an appreciative sound as he ran his palms along my bare skin. “ Charlie . You’re a goddess, you know that?”
My face flushed. If any other man had said that, it would’ve sounded silly. But when River spoke with sincerity, his words had power. The growing bulge in his pants only served to emphasize the point.
“You almost make me feel like one.”
He smiled. “Just wait until I have my mouth where I really want it.”
I sat up and launched myself at him. The urge to kiss him was too powerful to be denied.
When we separated again, I yanked the shirt over my head and pulled at his. River grabbed the fabric at his back collar and tugged it off. I fell back onto the mattress, him on top of me. I was down to my bra and panties, while he still wore his jeans.
His kisses were exactly as good as I’d imagined. That hint of danger, but comforting too. Familiar and energizing at the same time. Like a classic rock song with electric guitar blasting through open windows on a long drive home.
We had both waited so long for this.
Finally I had to breathe. River rested on his elbows so he didn’t crush me with his weight. But I felt the length of his erection straining the denim as it pressed into my thigh.
Oh, I wanted that.
I stroked his bare chest and made a desperate sound. “ You’re way too handsome. You’ve always been. It’s obnoxious.”
“You think I’m sexy?” He was being smug about it, of course, but I didn’t have it in me to deny it.
“You have no idea. I wanted to kiss you so badly after you carried me up the hill in the rain.” The confessions kept spilling from my lips, as if he’d unlocked a door that held my secrets. “That night in my bed, I touched myself thinking about you.”
My thoughts tried to move forward in time, remembering my dashed hopes when River had enlisted without a word to me. But I couldn’t think about that, because it would lead to all the years afterward. And the reasons we shouldn’t be doing this.
“Damn. That’s an image.” He dropped his forehead to mine, playing with the strap of my bra. “Show me how you touched yourself.”
There wasn’t even a thought of saying no. Those kisses had made me shameless.
I brought my hand between my legs. Used my thumb to stroke a few times over my panties, feeling the dampness there. River sat up to one side of me, watching. He pressed the heel of his hand to the hard length in his jeans, and at the same time, I dipped my fingers beneath the fabric of my panties and over my sensitive folds.
“Like this,” I whispered. “But I pretended you were touching me.”
With a growl and a muttered curse, he yanked my panties down and off. Pushed my hand aside and opened my legs.
And then his lips found my center.
Such intense pleasure. I grabbed handfuls of the blanket. River’s mouth, that sharp tongue that had infuriated me so many times, was sliding over and inside the most intimate part of me. The tip of his tongue flicked over my clit, and it was almost too much.
After a few moments, his immediate frenzy passed, and he slowed down again. My hips lifted. Wanting more. But he just smiled. Pressed a teasing kiss to where my inner thigh met my pelvis.
“You don’t know how many times I’ve imagined this. Finding out what you taste like.”
“Is it good?”
“Fucking addictive.”
Then there was no more talking for a while. Just breathing, River’s small moans, my gasps and cries. All the tension and fear and uncertainty of the last couple of days whited out. I gave myself completely to that moment and to him.
I wound my fingers into his dark hair and held on tight as pleasure exploded through me.
River sat up and wiped the back of his hand over his mouth. I probably looked debauched.
He got off of the bed and pushed down his jeans and boxer briefs in one go. As I admired his long, lean body, I arched my back to reach behind me and unhook my bra, which neither of us had bothered to remove yet.
And then River stretched out on top of me, skin to skin.
We kissed lazily. His cock pushed insistently at my belly, but he didn’t seem to be in a hurry to deal with it. I touched as much of him as I could. From the broad expanse of his back, down to his narrow waist and the curve of his muscular behind.
“I never thought I’d have you this way,” he said, hair falling over his forehead.
“I definitely didn’t expect it.” The past couple of days felt more like a dream than real. Mostly a nightmare. Maybe I wasn’t in my right mind to fall into bed with River like this.
But I didn’t regret it. Not even close. I wanted a lot more .
“Do you have condoms handy in this remote yet well-appointed cabin?” Part of me hoped to heaven he did. But the other part of me wasn’t sure I liked that idea.
“Are you asking if I’ve brought women here?”
“No, but now I’m curious.” As if the idea had just occurred to me. Sure .
“I haven’t.”
“No other damsels you’ve rescued with the Protectors?”
“Nope, not me.” He kissed my ear, briefly sucking the lobe and tugging it between his teeth. “If I had, would you be jealous?”
“Nope, not me,” I parroted. As if I had any right.
“I think I packed a box of condoms in a first-aid kit somewhere, just because I like to be prepared for anything.” Another kiss, this one between my breasts. “But do we need it? I’ve been tested. And the thought of being bare inside of you. God, Charlie, that does me in.” He lifted his head and looked up at me in that particularly River way. A sheen of humor and sweetness, and then sharp-edged wickedness underneath. A man who could be light-hearted one moment, and a deadly killer the next.
I used birth control. And I did want River exactly as he was. Every part of him, stripped bare with no more pretenses between us. But I couldn’t make myself that vulnerable. I was ignoring reality for a while, but I was still me .
“I’d feel more comfortable using protection.”
He nodded, barely betraying a hint of disappointment. “No problem. I’ll work with that. We can have other fun now, and I’ll find the condoms for later.”
“Later? You’re already making plans?”
“I like to be optimistic.” Then his smile faded, eyes going to half-mast with lustful intention. “Will you touch me, Charlie? Stroke my cock?”
My pulse quickened. “Yes. Please. I want to. ”
I reached down between us and gripped his shaft. His cock throbbed against my palm. I started lightly as I moved my hand up and down his hot, smooth skin. “Tell me what you like,” I said.
Not breaking eye contact, he took my hand and brought it to his mouth. Licked my palm a few times. Then brought my hand back down to wrap around his erection again, which felt even thicker now.
“Tighter.” His voice was deep, rumbling against my ear. “I like it rough.”
Another wave of heat singed me down to my toes. “So do I.”
“That’s what I like to hear.”
I gripped him as tightly as I could. Stroked. After a while, River took over, thrusting his cock into my fist and groaning with his lips pressed together. With my other hand, I held onto his shoulder, my nails scraping his skin.
My gaze trailed greedily over him. His soft lips parted, eyes dancing with dark fire. His streamlined body, carved like marble as his muscles flexed and moved above me. Skin glowing with sweat. The line of fine black hair leading down, down, down…
“That’s good, Charlie. So good. I’m going to?—”
A deep shudder went through him. River stilled. Cursed. His cock pulsed hotly against my hand.
I couldn’t look away. Mesmerized.
This was River . River and me. Finally . That word surprised me by its insistence in my head. Finally, finally.
He grabbed his shirt from the floor to clean us both up, then lowered himself beside me. River’s chest lifted and fell as he took long, deep breaths, sighing contentedly.
Meanwhile, that display had given me a new surge of energy.
I propped onto my elbows .
“You okay?” he asked.
“Very. That was…wow. Hot.” I couldn’t remember the last time I’d felt this kind of need. Insatiable. Heat kept blooming in waves across my body like a fever.
River grinned. He put his arm around me and tugged me against him. Our lips met, that hunger building once again, at least for me. Yet this embrace was even more intimate. Uninhibited.
His fingertips made a lazy trail down my side to my hip, brushing over my hip bone a few times. Then following the curve of my thigh to the inside.
I moaned as those fingers met my core. Stroked through my wetness.
“You think you could come again?” he asked.
I was rubbing my thighs together as he rubbed between. “Yes.”
“Needy, aren’t you?” River’s hand withdrew. But then patted his chest. “Crawl up here.”
That dreamlike feeling continued as I crawled up to straddle him. River held onto my hips, propped a pillow under his head, and pulled me into the perfect position for his tongue. And I did feel every inch the goddess being worshipped.
Finally .
We lay there in each other’s arms, listening to the chirping of the birds through the open door.
It was surreal to feel so secure here after what I’d experienced at the fundraiser. Even at the gas station earlier today, though the attendant had been trying to help me.
But at home at my parents’ house, I had always felt safe too. No matter what .
As an adult, every time I made the trip home, the difference struck me. I loved the excitement of living in the city, though Denver was by no means a major metropolis compared to other places. But home was a sanctuary where I always felt most like myself. Especially in the summer.
I hadn’t realized how much those summers had meant to River too.
I had accused River of leaving me behind and not caring about our friendship. Now I knew the distance between us had far more to do with his feelings for me. I’d had no idea, of course.
And I had wound up with his brother . Causing drama that I never would have wanted.
He sat up and scratched his head. “I still need to find out why Jud Hale contacted you yesterday. And you’re probably hungry.”
Ugh. My other ex. Because my past mistakes were unavoidable at the moment.
“I guess we skipped lunch.” I realized we’d eaten almost nothing today, except for the snacks Hodge had packed for us. And River was right. My stomach was hollow. Maybe that was something about having great sex. It woke up all the other appetites that you were ignoring.
I sat up and pulled him into a kiss. He had covered us with blankets a while ago, and they pooled around our laps. I felt the tiniest twinge of self-consciousness having my breasts on display, because this was River , which was ridiculous considering what we’d just been doing together.
“I’ll find us something to eat,” I said, “and you can check out my phone.”
“Are you going to hand over your passcode? Or do I need to break in?”
“I suppose I could save you the trouble.”
He smacked another kiss on my lips, then jumped up. I got an eyeful as he crossed to a shelf of clothes. River was clearly not self-conscious of his nakedness in the least. Nor should he be.
He pulled on a pair of sweats, then tossed me a T-shirt, and I caught it. It had NAVY emblazoned across the front. When I put it on, River swaggered over to tug the fabric down, arranging my collar and the sleeves and generally fussing over me. “I like you in my shirt. You don’t make it look as good as I do, but?—”
I reached around and smacked his ass cheek. He went over to the kitchen area, cackling, his smile so wide and beautiful my heart twinged.
While River messed around with his computer stuff, I dug into the cabinets that actually held food. There was a bunch of non-perishable items that I could get creative with.
“I’ve got MREs too,” he said over his shoulder. “If that’s easier.”
“No, I can work with this.” I selected a can of chicken, some packets of mayonnaise, crackers and seasonings. “I can almost make my mom’s famous chicken salad. Minus half the ingredients, but this will do.” I selected a jar of roasted red peppers to get some kind of veggie in there. I had no idea how long we would be here and didn’t look forward to the idea of eating military-style rations.
“I did love your mom’s cooking,” River said. “Didn’t know you took after her.”
“I learned. I’m a woman who lives alone and has a demanding career. If I didn’t prep ahead for some go-to recipes on the weekends, I would eat nothing but takeout and cheese and crackers.”
“Hey, I eat nothing but takeout.”
“Says the guy with an unlimited budget.” And the body of a twenty-five-year-old, though I kept that observation to myself .
While I put our lunch together at the counter, I peeked at what River was doing on the kitchen table. He’d set up some sort of contraption. It was like a box made out of wire mesh. He placed my phone in the box, then slipped his hands through the two holes in the front.
“What is that thing?” I asked, coming closer to watch him.
“A Faraday cage.”
He told me how it would cancel out the signals coming in or out of my phone. There was no cell service out here, but he wanted to be completely sure that no one could possibly use my device to track us. I also wouldn’t get any updated notifications, obviously, but River would be able to read anything my phone had already downloaded before I switched it into airplane mode and turned it off.
I stood at his shoulder while he powered my phone on. He could see the screen through the mesh. “But what about the holes for your arms?” I asked. “Why can’t a signal get through there?”
He entered the passcode on my screen and thumbed to the messages app. “It has to do with the size of the wavelengths. I can explain it all if you want.” He launched into a bunch of technical details, only stopping when he realized I was just standing there in silence, blinking at him.
“Not having trouble following, are you?” he asked.
“Not a chance. You’re just…so sexy right now,” I murmured. “I can’t get over it.”
With a mischievous grin, he grabbed his black-framed glasses and put them on. “How about now?”
Dead . I was dead.
“How about you read my messages from my ex, and I’ll finish making our lunch. Before I lose my willpower and jump you again.”