CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE
Fallon
THE AFTERNOON SUN STREAMED DOWN ON THE PERFECTLY made bed, complete with ridiculously expensive thousand-thread-count sheets Ellie had specially ordered.
But I scowled as I studied it. It wasn’t because the bed was uncomfortable—it felt like sleeping on a damn cloud.
And it wasn’t because I didn’t like the colors or the design—Ellie had done an amazing job with everything in the primary suite.
It was because it had felt so damn empty last night.
After Rose’s approval, we moved the party to my place and turned it into a packing one.
My siblings had helped me box up my meager belongings and schlep them over to the new house, and a friend of Mary Lou’s was going to sublet from me.
I’d never realized just how little I had until I saw it stacked in the corner of my new bedroom.
After that, we ate pizza, and then everyone went home. Kye had said goodnight and hightailed it to one of the many guest rooms, but that wouldn’t be an option after today. It would be far too risky for the girls to see us sleeping separately and wonder what was up.
A soft knock sounded on the bedroom door—more evidence that we weren’t what we should’ve been.
“Come in.”
The door slowly swung open, and Kye stepped in. He wore his familiar scarred motorcycle boots, jeans, a worn flannel over a Haven gym tee, and that metal band around his finger. “Hey.”
“Hey,” I echoed lamely, struggling to take my eyes off the ring Kye now wore. My ring.
His dark brows pinched. “You okay?”
I finally forced my gaze to his face. “Shouldn’t I be asking you that question?”
Kye shoved his hands into his pockets. “I dunno. I feel like we can ask each other.”
I sighed. He was right. And it was unfair that I was salty about spending my wedding night alone. Kye had been clear about what this was and wasn’t from the moment we’d entertained the crazy idea. “Sorry. I’m just … trying to get my bearings.”
“Might take us a minute.”
I stared back at the man who’d always given me everything—everything but the piece of him that would change it all. Was I really that greedy?
I crossed the distance and laid a hand over his heart. “We’ll get there.”
Kye’s expression softened. “We will.”
“How are you doing?”
“I’m scared shitless,” he whispered.
God, I was such an asshole. None of today was about me. It was about him and Hayden, Clem, and Gracie. I slid my arms through Kye’s and hugged him as tightly as I could. “You’re going to be amazing. The fact that you’re scared proves it because it means you care.”
Kye’s arms slowly came around me, holding me to him. “I don’t think I could do this without you.”
“You could,” I promised. “But you don’t have to.”
“I want to be what they need,” he rasped. “They deserve all the good. And only the good.”
They did. But so did Kye. And the fact that he didn’t see that broke my damn heart. But I knew he wouldn’t be able to hear it if I told him. Wouldn’t be able to feel it. So, I’d just have to give it to him through his sisters and in any tiny ways he’d accept.
“We’re going to make sure they get all the good,” I promised.
We stood there like that for a long moment—in the bedroom that only I had slept in the night before—and I tried to bleed into Kye everything he deserved without saying the words.
I wasn’t sure how long we stayed that way, but the ringing of our phones at the same time had us pulling apart. Kye reached into his back pocket as I moved to the bed where my cell phone lay.
“It’s the gate,” he croaked. “They’re here.”
I sent him a reassuring smile. “Let them in.”
Rose had thought it best to pick up the girls from school and bring them here. It would be a chance for Kye’s sisters to see their new home before they officially moved in this weekend and an opportunity for them to finally meet their brother.
Kye tapped the screen of his phone and then shoved it back into his pocket. “I guess this is it.”
I moved to him, hooking my pinky with his and squeezing. “It’s going to take time. Don’t take anything they say personally. They’ve been through a lot.”
He swallowed hard. “I know. Hayden especially.”
“Hayden especially,” I echoed. “But I know, with time, they will love you so damn much.”
“I hope you’re right.”
“I know I am. Now, let’s get down there to welcome them.”
Kye jerked his head in a nod, releasing his grip on my finger and leading the way downstairs.
His hand hovered on the front door handle for a long moment.
Until I laid a hand on his back. “All you can do is show up. And keep showing up—whether they’re happy, sad, or pissed the heck off. Just keep showing up.”
He cast a look at me over his shoulder. “Just like you always did for me.”
Heat flared along my sternum. The good kind. “Just like that.”
Kye opened the door.
As cold as it was outside, the Central Oregon sun blazed down, adding warmth that staved off the chill.
A station wagon appeared in the distance, and my heart started beating a little faster.
In a matter of seconds, Rose pulled to a stop in front of the house and opened the back door to help Gracie out.
Hayden climbed out, staring up at the massive home. Her expression was blank, but her face had gone pale. A different sort of ache flared in my chest. Because I couldn’t imagine how scared she must be. Likely twice that of her sisters because she’d always had to be their protector.
I called on my smile, the one that wasn’t so wide it looked forced but was welcoming, nonetheless. “Hi, guys. It’s so good to see you.”
That jerked Hayden out of her musings, and she hurried around the car to take Gracie’s hand. Gracie’s amber eyes were wide as saucers and locked solely on Kye. As if reading her apprehension, he dropped to the steps, sitting so he didn’t look quite so massive.
It was a little thing, silly given how freezing the steps likely were, but Kye did it anyway.
Clementine rounded the back of the station wagon, taking everything in. She stayed quiet, but her gaze wasn’t fearful. It was curious.
Rose dropped a hand to Hayden’s shoulder. “I know it’s a big day, and I just want to remind us all that it’s okay to have big feelings to go along with it. There’s been a lot of change lately.”
“You’re as big as a wild thing,” Gracie blurted.
He cast a confused look at me. “What’s a wild thing?”
“Don’t say that,” Clem bit out. “It’s not nice.”
Gracie looked panicked. “I just … like my book. The one Hay Hay reads me.”
A grin broke out over Kye’s face. “Where the Wild Things Are?”
Gracie’s lower lip trembled, but she managed a nod.
“Those wild things are so freaking cool,” Kye said, his smile still in place.
Gracie’s lip stopped trembling. “You think so?”
“They’re like monsters for good. Totally my vibe.”
Her mouth curved the barest amount. “I like them, too.”
Kye looked at the three girls from his perch on the steps. “I know this has gotta be scary. I’ve been there. Just know I want to do anything I can to make this easier for you. So, if you like or don’t like something, just tell me.”
He took a deep breath. “I know Renee said some stuff. Told you I knew about you guys. But I promise you I didn’t. If I had, I’d have tried to have you come live with me much sooner.”
Hayden’s mouth pressed into a thin line, but she didn’t say anything.
Clem looked between Kye and me. “Miss Rose said you guys got married yesterday.”
Kye cast a quick look at me. “We did. Is that okay with you?”
“She’s really pretty. And she likes chocolate,” Gracie said by way of answer.
Kye chuckled. “Well, I definitely wasn’t going to marry someone who didn’t like chocolate.”
Gracie and Clem giggled. Hayden, on the other hand, eyed me skeptically. “So much for your promise to be our microphone.”
That hit me square in the chest, but I took it. “I will never stop being your microphone. I just get to do it in a different way now. And Miss Rose is pretty dang good at the microphone thing, too.”
Rose brushed some invisible dirt off her shoulder. “Fallon did learn from the best.”
Hayden’s mouth just thinned further, but Gracie and Clementine didn’t seem to mind the change in my relationship with their brother. Hopefully, Hayden would come around with time.
Taking a deep breath, I tried another approach. “What do you think? Want to see the inside of the house and your rooms?”
Both younger girls’ smiles went wide as they nodded. Hayden’s expression remained carefully blank.
Kye pushed to his feet and moved inside, all of us following. But I didn’t miss how he gave the girls plenty of space. I hated that his experience meant he knew to do that. Hated that the girls probably appreciated it. But it was a beautiful gift, nonetheless.
Kye led the way upstairs, turning to the right and gesturing to an open door. “Hayden, this one is yours.”
I moved into the room, trying to encourage the girls to do the same. “Gracie and Clem are right across the hall. They share a bathroom, but we thought it might be nice for you to have your own.”
“Oh. My. God,” Gracie said reverently as she entered the room. “Hay Hay, this is like your dream.”
A queen-sized bed was on the far wall, and everything was done in shades of blue. It added to the theme, which was … hockey. Opposite the bed was a mural of an icy winter wonderland with the three girls on the ice and Hayden carrying a hockey stick.
“Is that … us?” Clem asked, her eyes wide.
I nodded. “Ellie, Trace’s girlfriend, drew it, and the rest of us helped paint it.”
“It’s so pretty.” Gracie wandered up to the wall, her fingers ghosting over one of her pigtails in the mural.
Clem plopped into one of the chairs that was a cross between a bean bag and a regular chair. “And look at this TV.”
My gaze lifted to Hayden as she moved deeper into the room, quietly studying everything.
Rose and Kye followed her in. Kye still gave her plenty of space, but he watched her with cautious eyes. “If there’s anything you don’t like, we can change it.”
“No,” Hayden croaked. “This is fine.”
I knew it was so much more than that. But there was only so much a fourteen-year-old could process. Especially when it was such a far cry from what she was used to.
Clem leapt from the navy chair in front of the entertainment setup. “Can I see mine?”
Kye chuckled. “You sure can.”
He led the way across the hall and into a book lover’s paradise. Clem’s mural was a field of wildflowers with her reading under a dogwood tree—so similar to the ones in Kye’s and my spot. There were plenty of bookshelves for her to fill, too, but I’d gotten her started.
“I got you some of my favorite young-adult series. But we can go to Sage Pages and pick out more because we need to fill a whole library downstairs.”
Clem’s head whipped around, sending her red hair flying. “There’s a real, live library here?”
“We have cards to the town library,” Hayden reminded her.
“Yeah, but a library in your house? That’s amazing!” She spun in a circle, arms cast outward. “I’m gonna be just like Belle.” She flopped onto the bed, and Gracie ran over to jump on it, too.
“It’s so cozy,” Gracie mumbled, running a hand over the comforter.
Hayden’s jaw tightened, a muscle pulsing there. My heart cracked a little more. She was so used to providing the girls with good things that I was sure it was hard to see someone else filling in.
Clementine shoved off the bed and grabbed Gracie’s hand. “Let’s see your room!”
They raced through the Jack-and-Jill bathroom, oohing and awing over the deep tub, shower, and rainbow-heart towels.
“No way!” Gracie shrieked as she ran over to her mural.
Kye smiled so wide; I didn’t think I’d ever seen anything like it. “Arden and Linc told us about what you drew at camp. We thought it would be fun to supersize it,” he explained.
“You made my room like the fair,” Gracie said, wonder coating every word.
The theme continued throughout the rest of the room with a comforter covered in balloons and a bed dotted with stuffed animals. Her window seat had brightly colored pillows, and the ceiling looked like the top of a circus tent.
“You like it?” I asked hopefully.
She beamed, revealing a tooth that looked a little loose. “This is the best thing EVER!”
Clem studied the small bookshelf loaded with children’s stories Mom had given us from her old stash at the ranch. “We’ve never had anything like this,” she whispered. “Not even close.”
More cracks fractured my heart.
Movement caught my eye, and I watched Hayden shift toward the door. And then I saw it—the anger, the fear, and the grief. All battling for supremacy in her expression.
“You can’t just buy us,” she snapped in Kye’s direction. “It doesn’t change that you weren’t there. You don’t get to be the hero now.”