CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR
Kye
HAYDEN’S WORDS LANDED LIKE CAREFULLY PLACED BLOWS—daggers to my most tender spots. “You weren’t there.”
She was right. And there wasn’t a damn thing I could do to change it.
Rose started to follow Hayden out the door. “Let me—”
I reached out, stopping her with a hand on her arm. “Can I try?”
Rose looked from me to the open door and then back again. “All right.”
I glanced at Fallon, needing a single point of contact before I went, some of her strength and fearlessness.
“I’m right here,” she mouthed.
It was all I needed—just knowing she was with me.
I looked at Gracie and Clem, who had expressions of worry carved into their tiny faces. “It’s okay,” I tried to assure them. “Feelings are safe here. I’d rather know everything Hayden’s got going on inside her than have her not tell me.”
“She’s big mad,” Clem muttered.
“And she should be. What you guys have been through should make us all mad.”
Gracie studied me with curiosity in her gaze. “You’re not gonna yell at her?”
I shook my head. “I promise I will do my very best never to yell. I might not get it perfect, but I promise to try. And if she needs to yell at me right now to get it all out, she can.”
“I don’t want her to yell at you. You’re nice,” Gracie whispered.
My lips twitched. “I’m big like a wild thing, remember? I can take it.”
That made Gracie smile.
“I’ll be right back,” I assured them.
“We’ve got it handled up here. We need to make new room plans,” Fallon said with a smile.
I left her and Rose with Clem and Gracie and hurried down the hall. I peeked into Hayden’s room, but she wasn’t there. I understood why. This place didn’t feel like home to her. Not yet. Which gave me an idea.
Jogging down the stairs, I moved through the living room and toward the back doors. There she was, standing at the end of the dock with her arms wrapped around her too-thin frame, dark brown hair blowing in the wind.
I grabbed two blankets and headed outside. She might throw them in the pond, but I could deal with that. What I couldn’t deal with was her being alone in all this.
Walking across the back patio and out onto the dock, I made a decent amount of noise. I never handled it well when someone snuck up on me, and I was sure Hayden had some of those same instincts.
She didn’t look up as I made my way to her, just kept staring out at the horizon. I wanted to wrap the blanket around her shoulders, but I wasn’t sure how she’d take that, so I simply handed it to her. She took it and didn’t heave it into the water—but she didn’t say anything either.
I wrapped my blanket around my shoulders and stood in silence with her. That had always been Fal’s greatest gift to me, and I wanted to give the same to Hayden.
We stood there for a long time before I finally spoke, simply staring out at the horizon. “I might’ve gone too hard with the rooms,” I said.
Hayden’s amber gaze flicked up to mine. “Clem and Gracie love them.”
I noticed that she’d left herself out of that equation. “And you’re worried I’m trying to buy their affection.”
“I know how that shit works. Les used to do it after he smacked Renee around, bringing her flowers and us stupid little toys. We didn’t need flowers and toys. We needed parents who weren’t complete garbage.”
My jaw worked back and forth. “You deserve that.”
“And you think you can be that?” Hayden asked, the words strained.
“I’m going to try my best to be a good brother. To give you a safe home and people around you that you can trust.”
Hayden let loose a scoff.
“You don’t have to believe they’re trustworthy yet.
That takes time. Actions, not words. But they’ve proven it to me with their actions.
” They’d done it for me time and time again.
And they were doing it now with all the support they’d shown.
My siblings and their partners had undergone background checks so they could babysit.
Lolli and Nora, too. Nora had even gone so far as to requalify for respite care so we could leave the girls with her for a weekend if we ever needed to.
Her gaze flicked to me. “The Colsons?”
“Yes. They saved me. They gave me a home and a family when I needed it the most. And even when I kept screwing up, they didn’t throw me away. They stuck with me.”
“That’s why you weren’t around. Because you loved them so much.”
Fuck. That killed me worse than a knife to the goddamned chest.
“No, I wasn’t around because I didn’t want anything to do with Renee. Because she hurt me, and she let someone else hurt me worse.”
Hayden’s eyes flared at that, her gaze running over my form as if looking for the injuries.
I tugged at the neck of my tee, stretching it so she could see the scar. Ink now surrounded it, so I could make it mine, but the wound from Rex was still there. The one Renee had watched him inflict on me.
“My dad tried to kill me while Renee watched. I wasn’t ever going to have them in my life again. Not ever. But that would’ve changed if I’d known about you. If I had known about Gracie and Clem. It would’ve damn well changed. That’s a promise.”
A muscle fluttered in Hayden’s cheek as her eyes glistened. She fought so hard to hold her tears back. “Everybody lies. Why should I believe you?”
“You’re right.” I released my hold on my tee. “Everybody does lie. So, I’m just going to ask you for one thing.”
Hayden looked at me, not moving, but her brow arched as if to say, What?
“Give me a chance to prove it to you. To prove I’m here for you. That I always will be—in whatever ways you’ll let me.”
Hayden was quiet as she stared at me, likely trying to detect deception. But she wouldn’t find any. “It’s not like we have anywhere else to go,” she muttered.
It wasn’t exactly a resounding message of faith, but I felt like I’d just won a goddamned war regardless. Even so, I’d never stop fighting. Not for any of my sisters.