Chapter 19
Edgar
Isimmer in my thoughts during lunch. It’s been over a week since we came to Alkrose. Everyone acts like this is the new normal. Is that truly what they all want? Even Terra seems content here; she seems to have made up with Finn already too. I stare at my cup of tea, somewhere else entirely in my mind.
Lucina startles me by grasping my hand. I flinch and look up at her; those bright blue eyes are filled with worry.
“I’m fine,” I mutter, already knowing she’s going to ask me what’s wrong. What isn’t wrong? So much is wrong that it’s beginning to feel right. I’ve discussed this with Vinnie many times over already. He feels it too, the acclimation to the horror.
Lucina lets out a sigh. “Can we at least be civil again? You’ve all but shut us out this week and I don’t think keeping yourself locked away with your Shadow is helping you.” Her hand trembles beneath mine. “Please?”
She draws out the last wisps of kindness in my dying heart. I don’t want to be alone, does anyone? Not with my ghosts, at least… I grip her hand tightly and she lights up with hope.
“I’m trying,” I manage to say convincingly. No. No, I haven’t been trying, but maybe I can. Maybe it isn’t too late to try to patch things up. To weave my friends and sister back into my heart.
Lucina smiles, those bright blue eyes so distant with the turquoise Nova blight covering them. “Okay, good,” she says softly before pouring us more tea.
Rowan and Vinnie swap anatomy notes across the table since Rowan’s been struggling. Not to be morbid, but I doubt Rowan will survive the second-semester exam. He hasn’t been able to summon his Shadow or speak with it, not to mention grasp any of the subject matter in our studies. We all heard what went down during the Culling Assessment, and the parameters of the next exam have yet to be released. All I can hope for is that we get to be on teams.
The days still go on, though, content and quiet for the most part. Everyone will be satiated until it’s them on death row. We’re slowly being consumed and digested by this castle filled with dark, promising magic.
As we enter the study hall on the third floor, the long-haired blond professor, Kallos, dips his head to each of us. I level him with a scowl to let him know I still don’t trust a lick of what he’s trying to impose on us. His golden eyes narrow with a smile as he studies me closely. I know the professors have an agenda for each Nova as they do Ash—their prized ponies, each to serve a purpose.
I’ve yet to discover what my purpose is to them. Terra’s is a bit clearer. Being a time wielder, she holds great power. I wonder if, as she unlocks more of her powers, she’ll be able to control more time, reverse more than just one’s injuries.
Kallos has six bars on his face—three on each side of his mouth as if someone’s stitched him up, making his smile haunting and eerie. He looks god-like. A shimmering and precious jewel of Alkrose.
“Still angry about your predicament, Eldridge?”
I roll my eyes and clench my jaw at the professor. “Of course I am. Aren’t you?”
“No—you’ll find it’s much harder to keep the fire burning inside yourself than to just let it simmer out,” Kallos mutters indifferently. I don’t like that answer, but what am I supposed to do about it?
The classrooms in Alkrose aren’t as lavish and shiny as the rest of the castle. There are five rows of desks with simple chairs tucked neatly under them. Dark shadows shoot to the farthest corners of the walls as Kallos raises his hand and the shades on the immense windows open, a trick he’s performed daily. It still awes me.
He is an emissary of light itself.
Kallos lets his golden cloak swirl in his wake as he approaches the board up front. He presses his palm to the blackboard. Scrolls of beautiful gold writing etch along as his mind compels them. Everyone watches in silence as the words finish with a silent wisp.
Name Retrieval: Demand the Shadow’s Name
A deep dread overcomes me as the memories of the boy with the skull enter my mind. Is that truly what my Shadow looks like or is it an illusion? I wish I didn’t know its name, but I already do.
Sully.
“Now, we already went over the basics last week regarding the sensation of the Shadows and how to interact with them. If you’ve been successful in the Shadow riding class and have seen your Shadow’s form, or even a semblance of it, please raise your hand.” Kallos’s golden eyes flick over the heads of the students.
The majority of the class raises their hands, with the exception of a few of those in beige cloaks. The Dvars students are much lower on the power totem, so it makes sense. They nervously scan the room and probably feel outcast compared to the rest of us. Vinnie, seated to my left, adjusts his glasses as he surveys the room too.
“Good. Now, if you have actually spoken with your Shadow, keep your hand raised.” All the hands go down, every single one—except mine. I swallow thickly. A thrum of power surges through me with all the eyes burning my skin.
Lucina and Vinnie stare at me from the seats beside mine. Lucina was there when I first properly met Sully; her blight proves it. But I haven’t spoken about the encounter with her or any of my friends from Za’Afiel.
Kallos’s gaze rests on me. “Good. Do you know its name?” I lie and shake my head. “All right—it’s still a good start. I will demonstrate first, then.”
The odd black-haired friend of Finn’s sits in front of me. I believe his name is Corvus. I study him and consider whether he is a potential traitor like Finn.
“Can I help you?” Corvus says flatly without looking at me. I don’t know how he can tell I’m staring holes into the back of his head, but he can. His purple cloak tucked to his side contrasts well against the black tactical gear.
“What do you make of Finn?” I ask evenly, deciding not to avoid him.
That gets his attention. Corvus turns to look at me and his eyes narrow with suspicion. “What’s your relation to him?”
I smile bleakly. “He’s my sister’s ex.”
Corvus doesn’t offer me a response. He just assesses me with his black eyes. I can sense his bright mind from the analytical thrums his fingers are making on the desk.
Okay. How about this then. “I think he’s a traitor to our country and a fox in the hen coop. I’ll ask you once more. What do you make of him?”
He hesitates and mutters a little too quietly, “I met him at the encampment site. Finn isn’t… He wouldn’t do that. Why would you even consider that he would?” He says the words but I can tell he isn’t entirely sure of them himself.
I lean forward and rest my chin against my palm. “He wouldn’t? It seems strange to me that he asked my sister to run away with him the morning of the attack. Seems odd that his father is the general of Barkovah, and yet, where is he?” My voice is a whisper, but Lucina and a few students around us turn to watch. Vinnie sets his hand on my arm but I ignore him. “It seems tooconvenient that he would be here—perfectly untouchedand cared for. Like someone important. Don’t you think?” I tap my finger against the desk in the same fashion Corvus does, and he takes notice, looking down at my fingers then back at my eyes.
At the front of the room, Kallos crosses his arms and lets out a weary sigh.
“Edgar, it seems youre keen on being the center of attention today. Why don’t you come up here? You can be the first to demand the name of your Shadow,” Kallos says unenthusiastically. His golden gaze lazily hovers over me.
My blood is hot inside my veins and I can sense Sully coiling and twisting with hatred deep in my chest. This isn’t me. I try to take a soothing breath before moving.
I obey and absently walk to the front of the class.
“All right. Now close your eyes, and since you have seen your Shadow already, picture it. Think about every detail you can remember. Demand it to appear before you and share its name,” Kallos says calmly.
“You sure about that?”
“Yes.” Kallos side-eyes me, suspicious.
I bite down on my lip. Don’t be afraid. Dont be afraid.
Taking a deep breath and closing my eyes, I let myself picture Sully. At first, I just see myself, or rather, an image of who I was before becoming the young man watching as his father’s blood dripped from the window pane… No. Don’t think of that. I quickly shake the thoughts.
I wince and strain my mind to focus. The Shadow appears so dull in my mind. The skull isn’t as horrifying as it was at the sanctum. The eyes of the Shadow are red. They flick up to me and there’s nothing—a horrible and empty nothingness inside those eyes. Something sharp twists inside my chest.
A simultaneous gasp rolls from the students in the classroom. Echoing. Swirling. Dancing at the base of my ears. Ringing, louder and louder until I hear that horrible phone ringing in my conscience as I did when my father splattered across the window. Ringing and ringing and ringing.
Until.
“Edgar!”
Kallos’s voice drowns out all the others. My eyes fling open and I take a steadying breath. Lucina, Vinnie, and Corvus are gawking at me with fear burning their eyes. Disgust and terror morph their frowns into expressions reserved for monsters.
Before me stands Sully, a boy with a skull in his hand, and blood is smeared across those beautiful windows that Kallos opened, painting the room red. There’s tension in the air, deep and dark and awful, yet no one dares to breathe or move a muscle.
My breath catches in my chest as I realize everyone can finally see it as I do. Sully smiles, grins so widely that its dry lips split and bright, fresh blood sheens. Iron fills my senses. If fear has a scent, this is it.
“Kallos—what do I do now?” I whisper it so quietly I’m unsure if he hears me.
The professor’s golden eyes are wide with shock. “You lied to me, Edgar. You know this Shadow’s name as well as I do.”
Sully’s decrepit smile fades as its eyes widen. All of a sudden it’s no longer a boy. Its eyes spread off in each direction slowly as if it’s being pulled apart. The skull drops to the ground and it splashes, flicking black liquid at my white cloak.
Kallos is in front of me before anything else can happen. In a blur, he washes me with a veil of golden light.
“Sully,” Kallos whispers at my Shadow with gritted teeth.
How did he know its name? Sully. The name thrums against my inner walls. I can feel the room spinning. The Shadow lets out a cackling laugh that seeps into the marrow of my bones. I can almost see the form it’s taking behind Kallos’s golden cloak, but I can’t quite make it out.
“Sully, leave,” I shout and shut my eyes fiercely.
The blinds shut all at once as screams and golden light burst through the classroom. Darkness moves like black sand, weaving and snuffing out the glittering wisps of Kallos’s light.
I can’t see anything.
Feathers tickle the back of my neck and whirl around me like a tornado. I’m breathless. Before my mind can settle on any of the rushing thoughts, it stops. It all just stops, and silence ensues.
A moment later the room returns to normal. The blinds open and natural, un-reddened light filters in and dapples the desks. Kallos’s hair is mussed and the students are out of their desks, pressed to the floor, scattered and hiding.
I look at Kallos. He takes a long, relaxing breath as he runs his hand over his head. “All right… Who would like to try next?” I tremble as I stare at him, waiting for him to address what just happened, but he only whispers, “I need to see you after class,” looks at me briefly, then nods for me to head back to my seat.
The rest of the class is a blur to me. Only thoughts of my Shadow and how terrifying it is trickle through my mind. How does Kallos know its name? He speaks as if he’s encountered it before. Is that possible?
I remain in my seat as the others gather their things and leave the room. Vinnie and Lucina spare me a look before I wave them off. “I need to speak with the professor,” I mumble.
Vinnie’s eyes narrow. “Are you all right, Edgar?” I raise my shoulders and drop them. He nods in understanding. Lucina smooths her hand over my shoulder wordlessly and the two of them leave. Corvus lingers after everyone else is gone.
Kallos approaches and sits on the desk before me. The sun emblem brooch at the center of his gold cloak is bright. “Edgar, Arthur has told me much about you and your Nova sibling, Terra. However, he forgot to mention that your Shadow is Sully.” He looks at Corvus and studies him for a moment before nodding. “Thank you for cutting in when you did. I was a bit too surprised to handle that situation as well as I should’ve.”
Was Corvus responsible for the feathers?
I struggle to meet Kallos’s eyes. I’m not even sure what to say.
Kallos goes on: “Sully is a Shadow I met a long time ago. I’m not sure we’re taking the right precautions with it. I’m sorry, Edgar, but I will have to place a cast on you to keep it in control until you’re ready to handle such power.”
My pulse thrums loudly in my ears and my heart clenches tightly as if Sully is squeezing it with rage. I choke out a breath. Kallos seems to know already that my Shadow is rejecting his words; he raises his hand and golden light emanates from his palm.
Sully speaks low in my head, its voice scratchy and eerie. Let him cast the power that I give you. See what it costs, boy. My muscles twitch involuntarily.
By the time the light fades. Sully feels like a small tumor, balled up and contained like a heavy lump of coal in my chest. Its power is locked away and out of my reach. A trickle of blood flows from each of my eyes, dripping onto my desk and painting the surface red.
“Gods, what did you do?” Corvus says with a shaky voice and comes to my side to inspect me.
Kallos cradles his hand as if placing the cast on Sully physically hurt him. “Help me get him to the infirmary and then head to your next class, Corvus. Not a word of this to anyone. I’m only trying to help.”
Corvus gives Kallos a wary look, but seems to trust him enough to give a firm nod. I groan as they lift me from the desk and guide me out into the hall and down to the second story.
Kallos tries to keep me conscious as my head bobs from left to right with each step we take. “How old are you now, Edgar?” he asks.
I try to remember. It takes a few moments. “Seventeen, turning eighteen next week.” The words come out in a slur.
“Good. And what’s your House name?”
I try to say it, but everything fades to black.