Chapter 15
Fifteen
SIMON
F eigrind was pulled away a little after lunch by another warrior. He left me with Maman, like usual, and she immediately started chattering about the work that needed to be done. I was getting better at pot making, so she demanded I help her. I didn’t mind, since it was better than just sitting around questioning myself. I was spending too much time in my head, wondering if I truly wanted to go back or if I wanted to stay here with Feigrind. I wasn’t going to let him sway me. This wasn’t where I belonged. And a beautiful cock wasn’t going to make me abandon my home or my creature comforts. Any more bar soap in my hair and it’d dry out. Then I’d really have something to bitch about.
“Why are you scowling?” Maman demanded from her seat next to me. “If you are too rough on the clay, it will get air pockets.”
I rolled my eyes. “I’m not being rough, and I’m not scowling. Stop projecting, you old hag.”
The first time I called her names, it had slipped out. I was annoyed with her son and took it out on her. She took it in stride and called me a petulant brat in return. Now we called each other names with an undertone of affection. She didn’t take offense, and neither did I.
She pinched the underside of my arm, making me yelp. “Call me old again and I’ll tell Feigrind to throw you in the river.”
I gasped, eyes wide. “You wouldn’t!”
I complained enough about the river. She knew how much I hated it.
She raised her eyebrows, a smug look on her face. “Want to test my patience?”
A smile cracked my face, and I chuckled, shaking my head. “I like you. And you’re not that old. Early twenties, at a guess.”
She flicked water at me for that, chortling. “Flattery will get you nowhere with me, brat. So tell me why you are moody. Is my son being overbearing again?”
My nose wrinkled. Feigrind wasn’t overbearing with me. After he realized I wouldn’t run, he gave me more room to be on my own, but when he stuck close, I didn’t feel like he was hovering. I felt more like he was watching over me to make sure I was happy. He left me with Maman because I seemed happy to be there, and when I was tired and wanted to go, he took me away again. That wasn’t overbearing.
“Why do you call him overbearing? Is he cruel to you?” I asked instead of answering her.
Her lip lifted in a scowl. “Not cruel, no. But he insists I cannot do things on my own. I am capable of getting my own meals or cleaning my tent. I don’t need him to do it for me. Ever since his father died, he has hovered. I do not appreciate his constant reminders that I am old.”
Well, when she put it that way, yeah, it sounded overbearing. But it also seemed like she was missing the point.
“He loves you,” I pointed out, glancing at her. “I don’t think he’s trying to make you look weak. I think he wants to keep you happy so he won’t lose you, too.”
She made a noncommittal sound, but something about what I’d said made me pause. He’d said that morning that my happiness was important to him. Did he only have sex with me so I wouldn’t leave?
Pushing to my feet suddenly, I looked around like he would suddenly appear in front of me. Maman looked up at me, a deep frown on her face.
“Where are you going?”
“Where’s Feigrind?” I demanded. I couldn’t let that question go until I got an answer. If he was just fucking me to change my mind about going home, I was going to kick his ass. He was not going to use sex to manipulate me.
Maman could obviously see that I was serious, so she didn’t argue, instead rinsing her hands in the pot of water and wiping them on her apron before pushing to her feet.
“Come with me.”
I followed her away from her tent and back toward where Feigrind’s tent was situated. She didn’t bring me there, instead heading down the path past it to a small fire where a few warriors were sitting around talking. She narrowed her eyes on the nearest one, and he pointed without questioning what she needed from him.
“He’s with Uttin in the village center.”
She huffed in annoyance and turned again, heading towards the center of the village. I had only been there a few times, and only in passing, so I hadn’t taken in many details. There were a lot of people socializing and working crafts around the big fire. Mothers with their babies watched over other children, and an older man with a long beard told the older children stories in one corner of the square. It was a lively place, full of happy people. Whoever told rumors about barbarians had obviously never visited this clan. It was nothing like people thought.
Feigrind was with a group of warriors off to one side. He had a deep frown on his face, and he looked a lot like Maman when she was annoyed. I wasn’t sure why, but the expression bothered me for some reason. He wasn’t a bright, sunny person, but he wasn’t this grump either. Whoever was irritating him was going to get a piece of my mind.
I came to a halt a few feet away. I’d been annoyed with him when I demanded to see him. Why was I suddenly jumping to his defense now?
Irritated with myself, I finished crossing the square, stopping alongside Maman, who was glaring at the group.
“He cannot go. He has a tribute to care for,” she insisted.
“Go? Where is he going?” I demanded.
A familiar warrior, one of the ones who’d picked me up from my town and brought me here, shot me an irritated look. “He is needed elsewhere instead of babysitting petulant tributes. You can survive on your own for a time.”
When I first arrived, Feigrind was annoyed but quiet. But when the warrior spoke harshly with me, he bared his teeth in a growl and stepped forward, putting himself between me and the asshole.
“Speak to Simon with respect, Bhortis, or it is me you will be dealing with.”
Yeah, screw that. “If he wants to talk shit, it’s me he’ll be dealing with, not you. I don’t need you to fight my battles for me.” My gaze whipped to the asshole still sneering at me. “And you should watch what you say. Your small dick energy is showing.”
His eyes widened in fury, and he took another step forward, glaring at me over Feigrind’s shoulder. “I will show you my cock, whore, as soon as you get on your knees to suck it.”
I had a comeback ready, but Feigrind moved before I could say anything. He tackled the guy to the ground. The asshole had no time to defend himself before Feigrind was slamming his fist into his face over and over. He had to be hauled off and away before he killed the piece of shit.
Maman took my elbow, dragging me away from the bloodied asshole on the ground to where Feigrind was being held back by a few of his friends. One I was familiar with, Uttin, was whispering harshly in his ear, trying to get him to calm down. Feigrind wasn’t listening. He kept trying to shake them off, and his eyes were locked on his prey.
Warmth filled my chest at his determination to defend my honor. No one had ever bothered before. I wanted to thank him, but with him acting like a wild animal, I doubted he’d be able to hear me. Rolling my eyes, I moved in front of him and twisted his nipple. He jerked away with a yelp, his fury draining away as he stared at me wide eyed, his hand cupping his injured pec.
“What was that for?”
“It got you to stop, didn’t it?” I asked dryly.
A few of his friends snickered at my tactics until I turned my glare on them. They all took a step back and one even covered his nipples protectively. I narrowed my eyes thoughtfully. I kind of liked being able to intimidate men three times my size.
“Go away. I want to speak to Feigrind.”
Those closest to him shot him wary glances, like they weren’t sure if he’d go after the asshole again, but Feigrind shook his head to reassure them.
“I’m fine.”
“Good. You did the right thing defending your tribute, but it would not be seen as such if you killed him,” Uttin said as he patted his shoulder, chuckling when Feigrind glared at him. “We will give you a moment to speak with your tribute. Try not to murder anyone while we’re gone.”
Maman raised an eyebrow at her son after they left. “You are normally more patient than this. Something you wish to tell me?”
Feigrind’s face fell into that mask of indifference I hated. I poked his side, scowling at him.
“Don’t give her that look. She’s right. You were patient with me, no matter what I did. It doesn’t make sense that you’re attacking people now. What’s wrong with you?”
He glanced at me, but didn’t reply. Instead, he changed the subject. “I left you with Maman. Why are you here?”
For a moment, I forgot entirely. It was shocking watching him lose his temper. The asshole who insulted me was still bleeding when his friends dragged him away. Feigrind watched with a narrow-eyed glare, not even looking at me. It was my annoyance that reminded me. And because I didn’t always handle my emotions well, I kicked him in the shin to get his attention again.
He hissed and stumbled back, his expression incredulous. “What are you doing, Simon? Why do you keep hurting me?”
Maman chuckled, reminding us both that she was still there. I’d honestly forgotten.
“I’m going to let you two speak. I wish to visit with Yami. Try not to break him, Simon. He is needed to protect the clan.”
She wandered away without a backward glance, still chuckling to herself. I turned back to Feigrind, crossing my arms over my chest and glaring at him. He was still rubbing his shin, like someone as small as me actually managed to do some damage. I doubted it. I was good with my knives, but I wasn’t great at hand-to-hand. It’s why I was never unarmed at home. In each room where we serviced customers, I kept weapons close by and out of sight. I wasn’t going to rely on Quincy to rescue me if a customer was hurting me. He didn’t care as long as he still got paid.
“Why are you here, Simon?” he demanded again.
I lifted my chin, watching his expression as I asked, “Did you only fuck me to convince me to stay with the clan?”
His eyebrows flew up, and he looked legitimately shocked, but I knew plenty of men who could lie as well as breathe. Feigrind was good at hiding his emotions when he was annoyed. He could excel in lying, too.
“What? Why would you ask me this?”
“Because until yesterday, you had no interest in males, and then suddenly you’re changing your mind, right after you argued that I wasn’t happy in my town. Are you using sex to make me think I’d be happier here? Because I will hurt you if that’s the case! I’m not going to let you manipulate me with sex!”
The surrounding conversations fell silent, and I realized too late that this was probably a conversation better had in private. I dismissed the thought immediately. If he wanted to lie and pretend he was suddenly into males, then he shouldn’t be ashamed of that. I wasn’t sneaking around and pretending, and I wouldn’t let him force me into that either. Not unless he was going to pay me.
The thought of Feigrind paying me for sex made me feel dirty. I’d never felt like that in my life, but just thinking about it made me sick.
Feigrind seemed confused, his gaze searching my face. All he’d see there is anger, so I didn’t know what he was searching for.
“Simon—”
“Yes or no, Feigrind. I asked a simple question.”
He sighed and shook his head. “No. I didn’t. I made love with you because I wanted to. Because you are beautiful, and I am enraptured by you. I would not use sex to change your mind. Do you truly think I am that cruel?”