Chapter Twenty
Linc
It’s still dark when I jerk awake, startled out of a dream. I lie there for a moment, blinking, wondering where I am—the windows are facing the bed rather than on the left the way they are in my apartment, and there’s someone in bed with me. Then it all comes rushing back—Elora!
It’s clear then why I woke up—she’s talking in her sleep, mumbling something unintelligible, twitching a little. Then she cries out, a sound of pure pain and terror, making me jump.
“Hey.” I push myself up on the pillows and gather her up in my arms. She’s half awake, breathing fast, and as I wrap my arms around her, I can feel her trembling. “It’s all right,” I murmur, rubbing her back and shoulders. “I’ve got you.”
She looks up at me, the moonlight just strong enough to highlight her features, her eyes clearing as she returns to this world. “Oh God, I was having a nightmare…”
“Yeah I know. It was just a dream though. Not real.”
“Did I cry out? I screamed in the dream.”
“Yeah. I’m so sorry, sweetheart.”
She sighs and nestles back into my arms, resting her cheek on my shoulder. “I’m sorry I woke you.”
“It’s okay. I sleep lightly.” I kiss her forehead. “You want to talk about it?”
She shakes her head.
“All right.” I won’t push her. I can guess, anyway. “How often do you have nightmares?” I hope our lovemaking didn’t stir up bad memories.
But she says, “Most nights.”
My brow furrows, and I kiss the top of her head. “Well nothing bad’s going to happen to you while I’m here.”
She doesn’t reply.
I shift on the pillows so I can turn on my side, and she presses up against me, our legs intertwining.
I stifle a groan. This is such a bad idea.
I sigh and close my eyes. I shouldn’t have given in to my desire. I seriously need to work on my self-control. The strange thing is, though, that normally I have quite a lot of willpower. I exercise daily, eat well, rarely indulge in food or alcohol, and rise at seven a.m. without fail. But ten minutes in Elora’s presence, and all my good intentions fly out the window.
She feels small and fragile in my arms. The last thing I want to do is hurt her. I know she’s going to feel it when I leave, and I won’t be immune either.
But is that a reason not to do this? I’m a big proponent of the saying ‘Better to regret the things you’ve done rather than the things you haven’t.’ Life is far too short to worry about coulda, woulda, shoulda. That’s what I’ve always believed, anyway.
The issue here, though, is that it’s not just about me. It doesn’t matter if I get my heart broken—it’ll serve me right for being an idiot. But I don’t want to hurt Elora. She’s young and beautiful, and she’s been through so much. I honestly wanted to help her.
Then I grit my teeth, angry at myself. Be honest, Linc. I slept with her because I wanted her. I wasn’t being noble or kind. I wanted to have sex with her, and I didn’t have enough self-control to keep my distance.
I tighten my arms, and she murmurs something and snuggles closer.
“I’m sorry,” I whisper.
She kisses my chest. “What for?”
I don’t reply, my throat strangled by emotions.
She turns and leans on my chest, resting her chin on the back of her hand. “Tonight was the best thing that’s ever happened to me. I will never, ever regret it, no matter what happens in the future. I can’t control how you feel about it. But I’d like you not to regret it, either. It was just what I needed, and I suspect it was what you needed too, to reconnect with me. I’m under no illusions about what happens going forward. I know you’re leaving, because your life is elsewhere, and that’s okay. It doesn’t mean I won’t be sad about it. I might even cry. But that’s okay, you know? It’s all part of the process. I’m glad we slept together. So glad.”
This girl… she knows how to completely unravel me.
“I won’t regret it,” I say, my voice a little husky. “I promise.”
She kisses my chest, then settles down beside me again.
We stay wrapped around each other for the rest of the night, although it’s a long time before I finally fall asleep.
*
The next time I wake, the room is filled with light the color of the inside of a cantaloupe melon—a creamy orange-gold.
Elora is still asleep next to me, facing away. I’m curled around her, one arm tucked under my head, the other around her waist.
Carefully, I disengage myself and rise to visit the bathroom. When I come back, I stand by the window for a moment, looking out at the view, stunned. The sun is rising behind the Remarkables to the east, and the mountains are the color of Cabernet Sauvignon grapes. The sky is a bowl of figs, cherries, and apricots. The lake is filled with blueberries and butterscotch. The morning is bright and so sweet I can almost taste it.
But I bet I can think of something that would taste even sweeter.
I turn back to the bed and discover that Elora is awake and watching me.
“Morning, gorgeous,” she says sleepily. “If anyone has binoculars over the other side of the lake, they’re getting a great view right now.”
I laugh and come back to the bed. She’s all curled up, only her bare shoulders and arms protruding, the duvet tucked around her body and legs. Her blonde hair lies tangled and spread across the pillow. Her English-rose complexion is slightly flushed, and her bare lips look soft as rose petals. She’s absolutely stunning.
Her gaze slides down my body to the erection that has miraculously appeared, widens a little, then returns to my face. Her eyes sparkle, amused, excited.
Slowly, keeping my gaze on hers, I drop to my knees. I lift up the bottom of the duvet. Then I duck beneath it and begin crawling up the bed.
“Linc!” she squeals as I find her feet and begin kissing them.
I chuckle and continue, pressing my lips to each toe in turn, then to her instep, then the inside of her ankle. Taking my time, so I don’t startle her, I kiss up her calves, then the inside of her knees.
Slowly, I part her legs.
“I haven’t had a shower yet,” she protests.
“Don’t care.” I kiss the inside of her thighs.
She doesn’t resist, although I’m sure I hear her whisper, “Oh my God…”
I know that no other man will have done this for her, and I glow at the thought that I can be her first.
“Try to relax,” I say, lowering down between her legs.
That makes her give a nervous giggle. “Yeah, right,” she says.
I chuckle, rub the outside of her thigh, and kiss her hip. Slowly, I kiss across the gentle swell of her belly. I dip my tongue into her belly button, which makes her shiver. I press my lips to the soft, smooth triangle of skin. Then I kiss down between her legs, and finally let my tongue join in the action.
Elora gives a long, dramatic, drawn-out sigh, and my lips curve up as I continue to kiss her. Ahhh… she smells warm and sexy, and, just as I thought, she tastes divine. Hot, sweet, sticky, kinda salty nectar of the fucking gods.
I make sure to take it slow and steady, concentrating on her clit, and she tilts up her hips, the movement telling me she’s enjoying it.
“Ohhh… Linc…” she says, and then I feel her hand in my hair, her fingers tightening.
“You’re so beautiful,” I murmur. Lifting my head, I circle a finger over her clit, then stroke down. “Does this feel good?” I ask.
“Mmm… yes…”
I continue for a while, wanting her to get used to these different sensations at a slow pace, so she feels comfortable and safe. She’s quite wet now, and my finger slips easily through her swollen folds. I stroke down to her entrance, then tease it, inserting my finger just a fraction of an inch as I go back to licking her clit.
“Is that nice?” I ask after a while.
“Yes…”
“Do you want more, Lora?”
She sighs. “Yes…”
I slide a finger into her. Nice and slow. Caressing, exploring.
She gives a long, heartfelt moan.
I lick her for a while. Then, gently, I insert another finger. I make sure to do it very slowly and carefully, still licking and sucking her clit at the same time. I slip my fingers in and out of her, pressing up just a little, and she moans again.
Staying at that pace, I keep up a steady rhythm, and it’s not long before I feel her fingers tighten in my hair, and her breathing begins to change.
“Oh my God,” she says, her hips tilting up. “Oh my God, Linc…”
“Yeah, baby. Just let it happen.” Thrilled, I tease her swollen clit, still moving my fingers, and that’s it—her orgasm sweeps over her. She stills, her belly tightening, and then shudders, clenching around my fingers with six or seven intense pulses that leave us both groaning.
When she’s done, I extract my fingers and kiss her there before pressing my lips up her body. When I get to her breasts, I stretch out beside her and circle her nipples lazily with my tongue, and she shudders.
“Was that good for you, baby?” I murmur.
“Mmm.” Her cheeks are flushed, and her eyes half-lidded with satisfaction. “Thank you.”
I laugh. “My pleasure. Literally. You taste amazing.”
Her eyes widen at that, and she smacks my arm. “Linc!”
“What? You do. And it fires me up.” I nuzzle her neck, sliding my hand back down between her legs, and she groans.
“You’re trying to sex me to death, aren’t you?”
“Is that a complaint?”
“Absolutely not. Sex away.”
I chuckle and stroke her, beginning to arouse her again, and she loops her arms around my neck and pulls my head down to kiss me.
Ahhh… this is magnificent. I’m in seventh heaven. Elora presses up against me, and I wrap my arms around her, and our bodies are flush from chest to thigh, our legs tangled together. I slide my hand into her hair, enjoying the way the strands slip through my fingers, while she strokes my back, running her fingers up my spine. I can feel her exploring the muscles in my back and shoulders, my biceps and forearms, familiarizing herself, maybe committing them to memory.
I will never, ever regret it , she said, no matter what happens in the future . I so hope that’s true.
But I’m not going to think about parting from her now, not when we’re here together, and the sun is coming up, flooding the room with lemon light, and in bed it’s warm and getting hotter. Our kisses are heating up, turning more urgent, our skin sticking together as our temperatures rise. When I stroke between her legs, her hips move to meet the movement of my hand.
I kiss her beautiful breasts, cupping them and covering her soft nipples with my mouth, then teasing them with my lips, teeth, and tongue.
Eventually, though, she says in a breathless voice, “Linc, please, I can’t last much longer.”
Only then do I retrieve a condom and roll it on.
I could easily toss her onto her back and thrust us both to a fast climax. But despite the fact that she’s obviously turned on, I don’t think she’s ready for that. Ten percent more grrr , she asked for. Okay, I can do that.
I lift her leg over my hip and position myself at her entrance. Move her and adjust the angle until I’m happy. Then I look at her face. Her eyes are wide, and she’s breathing fast. Aw, she’s nervous.
“Relax, baby girl,” I murmur.
A smile flickers on her lips. One arm around her, holding her close, I ease up into her, just a fraction.
Her eyes flutter shut, and her lips part with a soundless groan.
I take it slow again, even though she’s wet and swollen, and more than ready for me. I slide a little into her, then wait for her to adjust. She’s tense, and therefore tight, but when she opens her eyes and looks at me, she smiles.
“Okay, baby?” I ask.
She nods, breathing fast. “It feels different. You feel huge.”
I chuckle. “It’s just the different angle. We’ll go slow, okay?” I move back until I’m almost out of her, then push forward again.
She moans, closing her eyes again, but I don’t think she’s in pain. Her teeth tug at her bottom lip, and then she blows out a long breath.
“I’m not that big,” I scold.
“You feel enormous.”
“Is that another complaint?”
She gives a short laugh, then blows out another breath. “No, I’m just surprised.”
“You’re a little tense. Are you sure you don’t want to stop?”
She shakes her head. “No. I’m sorry.”
“Hey, sweetheart.” I cup her chin and lift it so I can look into her eyes. “Don’t apologize. This is amazing. I don’t care if it takes all morning. I’m pretty determined.”
Her lips curve up against mine. “I can see that.”
“I’m going to take you a fraction of an inch at a time.”
Her eyes widen. Smirking, I withdraw from her. Move the tip all the way up to her clit, through her swollen folds. Then direct it back down beneath her, and slide about an inch in.
I do this repeatedly, slowly coating myself with her moisture. Although she’s tight, there’s no friction, and she obviously doesn’t find it painful. She takes big breaths, and I can see her trying to relax.
Chuckling, I kiss up her neck and nibble her earlobe. “Let me in, baby,” I tease, pushing forward a little more. “You know you want to.”
She groans and clenches briefly around me. “Aaahhh… You must… be nearly there…”
“Just another inch…”
“Jesus…”
I plunge my tongue into her mouth and kiss her hungrily. She moans and melts against me, and I finally slide all the way in.
Our hips are now flush. I’m wrapped around her and inside her, and she’s my whole world—she’s all I can feel and taste and smell and think about.
“Baby…” I groan and, one hand in the small of her back, I hold her there as I start to thrust.
She tips her head back, wrapping her leg tightly around my hips and tilting up her pelvis to give me better access. “Oh my God,” she whispers, “that feels so good…”
“You’re doing so well,” I tell her, kissing up her cheek to her ear, and nuzzling behind it. “You feel amazing. Like hot, wet velvet.”
“Mmm.” She scores her nails lightly down my back, making me shiver. “I love how I can feel you all the way up.” Keeping her gaze on mine, she tightens inside, and I groan. “Sorry,” she says innocently, her eyes sparkling.
“I’m trying to stay in control,” I grumble, clenching a hand on her butt, unable to stop my fingers digging into the soft muscle as I fight to go slow.
Her lips brush mine. “What if I don’t want you in control?”
I close my eyes for a moment, still sliding inside her. “Lora…”
“You’re gentle, sweet… You’re so good to me, Linc. Patient. Kind.” She teases my lips with her tongue. “I want to pay you back.”
“You are,” I say gruffly.
She’s moving with me now, rocking her hips against mine, driving me in and out of her, so even though I’m trying to go slow, she’s forcing me to go faster, deeper.
“You’re driving me mad,” I say roughly, turned on by the sound of my erection sliding slickly through her wet flesh.
“I’m ready for another ten percent,” she says, and nips my bottom lip.
“Ow.” That flips my switch. I’m not about to pound into her—I have some self-control left, albeit in single figures—but I slip an arm beneath her knee to lift it higher, then shift position so she’s a little under me, and I’m more able to take charge of the action.
Her eyes are huge and bright blue as I push forward, burying myself deep into her. “So, then,” I say as I start moving with deep, penetrating thrusts, “how’s the study of sexual dimorphism coming along?”
“Pretty good,” she says breathlessly, moving with me. “Mmm… so… do you prefer the spotted hyena, or…” She giggles, and I laugh and kiss her.
“It’s all great,” I reply, stroking up her thigh. “But I have to admit I quite like taking charge.”
“It’s just nature,” she says, shifting a little so she’s lying more on her back.
I move a fraction so I’m more on top of her, still moving with long, slow thrusts. “Pure instinct,” I agree hoarsely, making sure I’m grinding against her.
She groans, so I’m obviously hitting the right spot. “Oh God… I think I’m going to come…”
“Ah, Lora, yeah, go for it, girl.” I kiss her, plunging my tongue into her mouth, muffling her reply. I speed up, wanting to join her at the finish line. I can feel heat building inside me, pleasure starting to ripple through me, but I hold onto the reins while I wait for her to catch up.
It doesn’t take long. Just another thirty seconds, and then she starts to take deep, ragged breaths, her lips parting and a frown appearing on her brow as she concentrates. I lift my head so I can watch her, thrusting hard now, my own muscles tightening, and I can see the moment her orgasm hits. She tightens around me, then starts to pulse, and at the same time I groan, my hips jerking with my own climax. We come together, the wave crashing over us both, and I try to be gentle, I really do, but it’s impossible not to give half a dozen hard thrusts at the end, as the urge to claim her and spill inside her drives every other thought away.
When I finally open my eyes, I look straight into hers.
I shudder, then lower onto my elbows and kiss her. “Sorry I got carried away at the end,” I murmur. “Did I hurt you?”
She shakes her head. Her eyes are wide.
“You sure?” I check, puzzled.
She shakes her head again. Then, to my surprise, her eyes glisten.
“Sweetheart…” I frown, kissing her. “What’s the matter?”
“Nothing,” she squeaks. “You’re amazing.”
“Aw.” I withdraw and dispose of the condom, then gather her up in my arms and pull the duvet up over us. She nestles into my embrace, tucking her head under my chin, and I hold her tightly, kissing the top of her head.
“I’m all right,” she says, taking a big, shaky breath. “It just swept over me there a bit.”
“That’s okay. It can be pretty intense.”
“Yeah, that’s the word. It’s so different from doing it on my own.”
I close my eyes. “Don’t tell me about that right now. I need a few minutes to calm down.”
She giggles. “I just meant that when I do it myself, it’s sort of fast but less intense, you know?”
“Jeez, now I’m going to have to count backwards from a hundred. Ninety-nine, ninety-eight, ninety-seven…”
She laughs, then gives a long sigh. “Sex is kinda fun when you’re doing it right.”
I stroke her hair, thinking how much I’ve dreamed about having her in my arms like this over the years. “Yeah. Sure is.”