Chapter Eighteen #2
“Down the hatch,” I mumbled before drinking it like a shot. I only cringed a little. The taste wasn’t as gross as I remembered. Floral and vinegary notes but sweet too. The latter was probably the extra honey he’d added.
“See? Not so bad, was it?” Briar leaned in and kissed my temple. His lips lingered against my skin. “Your body is now healthy and well, but what of your heart?”
“To be determined,” I said, knowing what he was really asking—where I stood with Lord Onyx. “Someone isn’t too happy about the whole fated mate thing. Onyx rejects the idea. But I’m not going to give up that easily.”
Briar smiled. “Good. If anyone can reach him, it’s you.”
Ever since the day I’d visited Lupin’s magical emporium and made the wish on that stone, my life had been riddled with one challenge after another.
Hard to acquire coffee beans? Acquired and opened my own café on top of it.
Knight captain who grumbled at me all the time? Captured his heart, just as he’d captured mine.
Getting Evan-napped by a redheaded thief and being whisked away to the dark wood, facing down scary crow demons and slimy worm things? Not only survived to tell the tale, but that thief was now one of the men I couldn’t live without.
On and on the list went. I might not have been physically strong or skilled in much outside the kitchen, but I was resilient. A persistent pest, just as Onyx said, who refused to back down. He could try to push me away, but I refused to give up on him.
And I felt like a part of him didn’t want me to.
***
“You’ll find him in the east wing.”
The last words Varys had told me after dinner.
A meal that a certain demon lord had skipped.
In fact, I hadn’t seen Onyx all day. Not at breakfast, lunch, or dinner.
Not even a glimpse of him on the castle grounds while I’d chased Oreo down the hallways and around the courtyard outside.
It was what had prompted me to track him down that evening.
My men had been reluctant to let me wander off without them, but had agreed not to follow. Not that I wanted to keep anything from them. I planned to throttle a demon for being such a stubborn butthole and didn’t want them caught in the line of fire.
I had kissed each of them before staring my journey throughout the castle. My hunt.
“Avoiding me? Cute.” I stomped down the corridor, mumbling as I went. “You think I’m a pest now? Just wait, Your Majesty. You haven’t seen anything yet.”
I just needed to, you know, actually find Onyx first.
In hindsight, I should’ve asked Varys to show me the way. Words like ‘east’ and ‘west’ meant nothing to my directionally challenged ass. Rowan wouldn’t have been much help either, seeing as to how he hadn’t been to Onyx’s room either.
Where was that shadow creature? Although kind of eerie in how his lanky-limbed form had flickered, he’d been nice enough. And by nice, I meant he hadn’t tried to eat me or anything, which made him a decent guy in my book.
“Looking for something?”
I screeched at the sudden voice and karate chopped the air.
Onyx leaned against the wall a foot away, his arms crossed. “Is that truly how you move in a fight? If so, I see why you need so many men by your side protecting you.”
“I can fight,” I said, regaining my composure. Kind of. The shock wore off, but now I had him in front of me in all his glory. Fitted black pants showed off his long legs and his red shirt gave a mouthwatering peak of his toned chest. And his scent… good lord. It was stronger than it’d ever been.
His eyes raked over me. “You shouldn’t wander around this wing of the castle all alone.”
“Why not? Is it haunted?”
“By spiders,” he answered. “Thousands of them. They enjoy swinging down from their webs and gobbling up little birds. Better run along before they notice you’re here.”
“Liar.” But I smoothed a hand over the top of my hair anyway, paranoid by the thought of a spider dropping down on me. “Where were you today?”
“What business is that of yours?” he asked, expression unreadable as usual. I searched for the cracks in his mask and came up empty. “You think because I took you to my bed that you’re entitled to the details of my personal life?”
“Well… no.” I shifted weight to my other foot. “I’m not entitled to anything. I just hoped you’d tell me.”
“Answer me this, little bird.” Onyx lightly pushed from the wall and stepped toward me.
More of his shirt fell open, revealing more of the tattoo-like mark.
“What if I told you I spent the entire day in bed with someone who wasn’t you?
Several, in fact. Three in my bed at the same time, each with their mouths and hands on me.
And me inside them, fucking all three of them as I fucked you last night? ”
Pain pierced the space between my ribs.
“Ah. You don’t like that answer much, it seems.” He stopped in front of me, close enough for me to feel the heat of his body. “How selfish of you. Having so many lovers in your bed but having the audacity to be upset when I do the same.”
“I…” The pain in my ribs spread to my heart, and my eyes burned. The urge to turn and run was strong, but I stayed in place, refusing to give him what he wanted. “You’re right.”
“About what?”
“It does upset me,” I admitted, throat burning like my eyes. “Which isn’t fair, I know, so I guess I am selfish. But my men and I are all honest with each other and talk about everything. I never do anything to hurt them. I got their permission before you and I…”
“Fucked?”
I nodded. A tear slipped free, and I wiped at it. “You made it clear you didn’t want romance or attachments though, so I shouldn’t be surprised that you were…” My throat squeezed. “With someone else.”
Onyx slowly breathed out. “I wasn’t.”
“What?” I wiped at my eyes again.
“With someone else,” he said, reaching for my face. He stopped before making contact and lowered his arm back to his side. “I wished to see your reaction is all. Now that I have, I find myself regretting it immensely.”
It took me a moment to process his words. “You lied?”
“Yes. I spent the day in my study reading. Alone. With the exception of Fane who kept bringing me food and insisting that I eat.”
I expelled a breath. “So you lied about sleeping with other people to… what? Upset me?”
He averted his gaze to the floor.
“Why are you so determined to chase me away, Onyx? Is it love in general or me personally?”
“You,” he softly answered.
Heat tingled in my scalp, and there was a wobble in my chin. “I see.”
“Do you?” When he reached for me again, his palm made contact and rested lightly on my cheek. “Because I don’t believe you do. The truth isn’t always clear at first, often blurred by assumptions.”
“Then tell me,” I responded, heart heavy. “Lay it out for me plain and clear, so I don’t misunderstand.”
Onyx held my gaze for a moment or two, then released a resigned breath. “Very well.”
He enveloped me in his arms before a tingling sensation consumed my entire body. Our surroundings changed. We were no longer in the moonlit corridor and instead stood in the study where he’d invited us for drinks the first night my men came to the castle.
A fire burned low in the hearth, and a half empty goblet of wine set on the small table beside a burgundy armchair.
Next to the goblet was a leatherbound book, the spine worn.
Tingles of anticipation shot through me when I realized it was the same one I had flipped through the day before. The storybook with the red spider lily.
Other novels were stacked on the coffee table, along with a dessert plate I instantly recognized as part of the set I’d used to serve the carrot cake earlier that evening. Fane, the sneaky demon, had made sure Onyx got a slice of it.
“So this is where you’ve been all day.” I slowly walked through the study, glancing at the various shelves.
“For most of it, yes. Just as I told you.”
“After you lied first,” I reminded him, stopping in front of the mantle to toss him a raised eyebrow look. “Quite the story you told too. Not just one person but three. Descriptive too. Especially the part where you mentioned being inside them.”
“Not my proudest moment.” Onyx sat on the couch and patted the cushion beside him, a silent request for me to join him. I did, though my legs wobbled on the way. “Truth be told, it’s been a while since anyone has been in my bed. Apart from you.”
Damn if that didn’t shock me—in a good way.
“This pleases you?” he asked, missing nothing.
“No.” I rested my hands in my lap and kept my knees pressed together, feeling awkward. “Okay, maybe a little. Guess I really am selfish and greedy, huh?”
He faintly smiled. “The possession you feel over your males comes from the fated bond between you.”
“Between us,” I said softly. “That includes you too, you know.”
“I know.”
“But you don’t want to be with me?”
“Want has nothing to do with it.” Onyx’s eyes found mine, and the red irises glinted with firelight. “You are the one person in all the realms I fear the most.”
“You’re afraid of me?” I asked, surprised. “Why? Worried I’ll bake too many treats and make you gain weight?” The last bit was added in an attempt to combat my nerves. Humor was a defense mechanism. “You’ll still be handsome no matter what size you are, so eat all the honey cake you want.”
A soft chuckle rumbled in his chest. It transitioned to the softest of sighs. “I heard your conversation with Lake in the garden earlier today. He truly wasn’t bothered by the thought of me touching you.”
“How did you hear? Were you hiding in the bushes or something?”
“Within the shade of the oak tree,” he responded. “Using the shadows. When you left the garden and were speaking to Briar, I concealed myself in the trees within the courtyard. I could’ve sworn you saw me.”
The pieces clicked into place. “So that was you. I didn’t see you, but I caught a trace of woodsmoke.”
“You said we each have a unique scent?” he asked. “Each of your… mates?”