Chapter 17 Sergei
SERGEI
Sergei
Itold myself I didn’t need her.
That I didn’t want her in my arms or feel her mouth on mine.
That I didn’t want her in my bed or to claim every inch of her.
But it seemed that she was determined to make a liar out of me, and it was fucking with my head.
I’d been attracted to many women in my time but never had I ever been so utterly consumed by one.
Lina invaded my thoughts, my dreams, and there was nothing I could do to stop it.
I was at the brink of completely losing it after that kiss.
It lit a fire in me that I feared would never go out.
And I wasn’t alone in this catastrophe in the making.
I saw the way she looked at me when I was checking her foot, and her eyes drifted over my bare chest. It had been a long time since I’d spent much time with a woman, but I knew what that look meant. I just didn’t know what to do about it.
Thankfully, a knock at the door gave me a moment to think it over.
Or so I’d hoped.
It was early, so I figured it was Nikolai stopping by to aggravate me once again.
I was almost to the door when there was another knock.
This time louder and more impatient. Annoyed by the rush, I looked through the peephole and groaned when I saw Viktor’s face staring back at me. He scowled as he ordered, “Open up!”
I swung the door open, and before I could berate him for being a fucking nuisance, he shoved past me and roared, “Did you know?”
“Know what?”
“About Alina?”
His chest was heaving, and anguish marked his face. My brother was hurting, and he was hurting because of me. He studied me for a moment, and then his eyes narrowed. “You knew.”
“Knew what?”
“That she was dead!” He took a step toward me. “You sorry son of a bitch! She’s dead, and you knew it, and you didn’t have the fucking decency to tell me!”
“Viktor…”
“Don’t!” He jabbed me in the chest. “You knew what she meant to me. You knew she was one of the only people I ever gave a damn about back in that hell we called home, and you didn’t even pick up the phone to call me. What the fuck is wrong with you?”
“You don’t understand.”
“Oh, I understand completely!” He started pacing like a caged animal. “After everything we’ve been through, the hell we’ve been through, and you couldn’t pick up the goddamn phone!”
“You don’t know the whole story. It’s complicated, and…”
“She’s dead. What’s complicated about that!”
His words hit me hard, and all I could do was stand there with my fists balled at my sides, knowing that the truth was only going to hurt him more. This was on me, and there was nothing I could do to make it better.
It didn’t help matters that Viktor was getting angrier by the second.
“She was one of the few people who really understood me. Do you get that? Everyone else back home just saw me as Dimitri’s middle son.
They saw nothing else, but she did! She saw me.
And I had to find out she was gone from a goddamn newspaper that had been tossed in the fucking trash! ”
He slammed his fist into the wall as he barked, “I just happened to see her picture… If I hadn’t, I would’ve never known.”
His rage collided with grief, and he was on the verge of a breakdown when Lina whispered, “Viktor?”
Her whisper cut through the air, and everything around us stilled. I glanced behind me and found her standing in the hallway just outside my room. She was barefoot and wearing nothing but her nightgown. Her hair was down around her shoulders, and her eyes were filled with a mix of fear and regret.
The anger drained from Viktor’s face, leaving him pale with disbelief.
His mouth dropped open, but no words came out.
He just stood there, staring at her like she was some kind of ghost. After a few moments, he looked at me and then back at her again.
Finally, he growled, “What the fuck is going on?”
I didn’t like the way Viktor was looking at Lina and felt an overwhelming need to put myself between them, shielding her from his view. But my feet seemed to be nailed to the floor, and all I could do was stand there and watch as she stepped further into the room.
She looked so vulnerable in her nightgown and wide eyes, but her voice was strong as she announced, “I was in trouble. Really, really bad trouble, and I came here for help.”
“Here?” Viktor looked like he was barely holding himself together as he snapped, “You came to Sergei for help?”
Her eyes skirted over to me, and for a second, my breath caught. Damn. There was no denying it. This woman had a hold on me like no other. She shook her head as she admitted, “No, I came here for you, but Sergei…”
“You’ve gotta be fucking kidding me!” Viktor’s arms flew into the air, and his rage escalated as he shouted, “So, this is it? This is what all the secrecy was about? You were hiding her from me, so you could play hero?”
“It wasn’t like that.”
“The hell it wasn’t!” Viktor took a charging step forward. “How long has she been here?”
“A couple of weeks before you left for the Caymans.”
“Motherfucker! How could you do this!”
“You think I wanted this.” My own anger started to get the best of me. “You think I asked for her to show up on my doorstep all bruised and broken? You think I wanted her to be hunted down like a fucking animal?”
“You should have told me!”
“I did it for your own good. You would’ve let your emotions cloud your judgment, and you would’ve gotten us all killed!”
“Bullshit!” he spat. “You wanted this! You always have to be in control. It’s who you are.”
With that, Lina dipped into her bedroom and closed the door. The click of the lock sounded like judgment. Viktor used the moment to look at me and snarl, “So, what did you do, bossman? Did you kill him? Was it you who put Alek in the ground?”
“I did what had to be done.”
“And what was that?”
“I took care of it.”
“That’s not going to work this time.” Viktor’s eyes widened, searching my face. “I want to know what you did!”
His tone ignited that old bratva darkness I carried deep within, and whatever calm I’d clung to snapped like thin ice.
The old Sergei stepped into place—the one who said what he wanted to say and did whatever he wanted without giving a fuck who I destroyed along the way.
My throat tightened with rage as I growled, “I made sure that bastard got exactly what he had coming.”
“How do you know that it won’t come back on us?”
“It won’t.”
“But how can you be sure?” he pushed. “This is the bratva we’re talking about!”
“I know damn well who we’re talking about. Do you? Have you kept up with the world we left behind? Do you have people who will go to incredible lengths to fulfill an order from you? Would they put their lives on the line for you? Because I do.”
He didn’t respond.
I didn’t expect him to.
He knew the power I had, and he hated me for it.
I ran my hand firmly down my throat, trying to relieve the knot that had formed there. “With their help, I put an end to Alek, and anyone connected to him. My only regret is that I wasn’t the one with the blade in my hand.”
The words had barely left my mouth when I noticed Lina standing at her bedroom door.
She’d changed into leggings and a soft white sweater, and her hair was brushed back into a ponytail.
She looked between us, staring at the wreckage of truth and lies, and that’s when I decided I didn’t give a damn what Viktor thought.
But I did care what she thought.
I cared too fucking much.
Her eyes lingered on Viktor for a moment, and I saw it.
The hesitation. The need. She wanted to talk to him, and the only way that was going to happen was for me to choke on my own fucking pride.
I clenched my jaw and straightened my back before turning my attention back to Viktor. “You two should talk.”
The look I gave him wasn’t a request. It was a warning not to cross the line.
His expression softened, and I took that as my cue to turn and head for my office.
I walked past Lina, and she didn’t try to stop me.
She just stood there with a somber expression and watched as I disappeared from the room.
I closed the door, and the silence that followed was unbearable.
And then, I heard them talking. Their voices rambled through the walls, but they were too muffled for me to hear what was being said.
But it was clear enough to gut me when I heard the cadence of Viktor’s grief and the softness of her replies.
I sat there, listening to every murmur and gasp, and I was hit with a profound realization. I was afraid. Not of Viktor. Not of the bratva or the blood that stained my hands. But this thing with her and Viktor got me.
I didn’t want to lose her.
Hell, the thought rattled me worse than any bullet ever could.
She wasn’t mine, but the idea of her walking out that door with Viktor, or anyone else, made my chest ache.
This wasn’t lust or protectiveness or some half-assed sense of duty.
It was much more than that. This was me realizing that, right or wrong, I would cross whatever line I had to cross to make her mine.
And God help anyone who tried to stand in my way.