Chapter 12
Zsekhet
Cosima sitting astride my body, my cock embedded deep in her tight passage, was a sight I wanted to burn into my memory.
It was glorious for many reasons, not least of which was the sight of her luminous smile or the bounce of her voluptuous breasts.
The tips were pink and had turned into tight, intriguing points.
I only had to roll my spine a little to be able to reach them with my tongue.
When I flicked the tip, then curled my tongue around one nipple and tugged, Cosima’s snug heat tightened around my cock in the most delicious way. I wanted more of that so I repeated the motions, thrumming her nipples and that little pleasure button until she spiraled into another loud orgasm.
My mate was a screamer and I relished every sound she made, even if it forced me to keep some of my senses on the door to our little prison.
If anyone came to investigate I’d know, nobody got to see my mate like this but me.
But hear? Sure, they could hear all her pleasure shouts and know how much I pleased her.
When she was panting through her latest orgasm I clasped her hips with both my hands and gently started moving her up and down my cock, raising my hips in firm thrusts. Pleasure sizzled through me with each motion, more seed already rising like pressure along my shaft and in my pouch.
I bit my bottom lip, tasting just a hint of blood as one fang pierced the skin.
I was so close, but I wasn’t going to topple over that precipice without my mate coming with me.
Just a few more strokes, and her walls were fluttering around me.
I reached down and thrummed my thumb over her pleasure button and that was it, she came on a little shriek, her eyes rolling back in her head.
Clamping down on me with her inner muscles, it felt like she was sucking me deeper into her body; sucking the seed right out of me.
I groaned, clutching her tightly to me as I emptied myself inside of her.
The pleasure was dazzling, easily beyond my wildest dreams. Cosima was going to be my new favorite addiction.
Curling her in my arms, I tugged her against my chest to snuggle, careful not to jab her with my chin horn as I held her. “That… was amazing,” I said huskily, and then I had to laugh when she reached over and pinched my nipple and gently tweaked the gold bar piercing it.
“Amazing, huh? That all you’ve got to say?
” she sassed, tilting her head just enough that I could read the twinkle in her gray eyes.
I loved seeing her like this, all tousled and flushed from our nest play, her freckled cheeks rosy.
She was adorable, beautiful, and she was finally in my arms. All mine.
Then coldness splashed down my back when a realization struck me.
Was she really though? When I was still keeping secrets from her?
That wasn’t right, that’s not what mates did.
My stomach felt hollow and painful when I contemplated that she might withdraw from me when she learned the truth of who I was, of why I was here.
I should have told her this before we consummated our mate bond.
I had done a terrible thing, tying her to me as I had, before she had all the facts.
It just hadn’t seemed to matter after the heart-shattering story she’d told me.
I’d been so furious and sad for her, for her loss and her pain.
I’d meant every word I’d told her and then some.
If I could turn back time, if I could fly back to the past and rescue her, I would, in a heartbeat.
I would save her human mate even if that meant she could not love us both.
We cuddled for a long time, Cosima even napped for a while, but I could not shake the unrest in my heart.
I had to come clean, and quickly, but how did I tell her that I was sent to Haven to spy?
Eventually, we got up to clean ourselves, flip furs, and share some more food.
The silence felt awkward and I hated that I was the cause of that, it was making my mate’s still fragile heart ache.
“I need to tell you something,” I said eventually, her mouth dropped into this little circle and my cock jerked in its pouch at the sight for no reason.
Why did I find that look sexy? She was surprised and worried, this was no time for my libido to act out.
I picked her up in my arms, pulling her into my lap so I could hold her close as I spoke.
“You shared your past, so I feel like I should share mine,” I said, starting easy was the way to go.
Even if telling her about some of the less good parts of me wasn’t what I was looking forward to either.
Like the blood lust that I struggled with, a rage that had started when I was a youngling just out of his fifth molting.
“Are there things in there you think I won’t like?
You’ve gone so quiet and pensive. That’s not the Zsekhet I know.
” Ah, she read me like the palm of her hand, already, she knew me well.
At least she wasn’t pulling back and she’d relaxed and was now looking up at me with curiosity, not hostility or distrust.
“I don’t know, but you have a right to know.
” She nodded and smiled encouragingly so I explained the blood lust carefully.
“I trained Ses to stop me if I get to that place, but you need to promise me to stay back and not interfere if it happens.” My biggest fear with the blood lust was that I’d turn on a loved one in one of those rages.
It hadn’t happened yet, but that was only because nobody but Ses had ever interfered.
She patted my cheek, a serious expression on her face which I searched for any hint of judgment. “But Zsekhet, don’t you remember that I whacked you with a stick when you were fighting Scar’at? I’m pretty sure you were experiencing this ‘blood lust’ then. Do you remember what happened then?”
My brow furrowed as I thought back on that moment.
I had no recollection of her hitting me with anything, but now that she made me recall, I did remember switching from that rage to concern for her just like that.
“Yeah, that’s what I thought,” Cosima said smugly, nodding her head.
“I’ll be careful, but I don’t think we need to worry. You would never harm me.”
I liked how confident she was of that fact.
I loved that very much, even if I still felt a niggle of worry.
Had that been a fluke? Driven by the knowledge that she’d been in danger at the time?
What if I got enraged for another reason, not related to her well-being?
My thoughts started to spiral, compounded by how much I hated being this confined beneath a mountain when I couldn’t leave at will.
“Is that what you wanted to tell me? Or is there something else?” she asked, her hands moving to the hemline of her dress where she started to fidget with the frayed edge. She was clever, she sensed that there was more I was holding back, and she didn’t deserve that.
“No, there’s one other thing.” I took a deep breath and then I took the plunge, “I wasn’t cast out of my Clan, I was sent to Outcast Haven to assess the threat level.
” I froze in place, waiting for her reaction, my eyes anxiously scanning over her face.
I expected her to be upset, or mad that I hadn’t been honest, I didn’t expect her to start laughing.
The peels of laughter were one of my favorite sounds, I loved nothing better than to see her happiness.
Right now, I would still prefer to hear her thoughts.
Why was this funny? This was a big deal and she was laughing as though I’d made a joke.
Granted, I liked to joke around, but I’d been deadly serious. What was happening right now?
“Cosima?” I asked tentatively, “Are you okay?” I clutched her middle when she threatened to topple out of my lap.
She raised wet eyes to my face, a hand clutched over her mouth as if that helped to contain the mirth bubbling out of her.
Was she hysterical? Had she lost her mind somehow?
Worried, I started to tilt up her chin, inspecting her head from all angles to see if she could have bumped it earlier and was only now starting to experience the effects.
“I’m fine!” she batted my hands away from her face, still giggling but at least able to speak.
“It’s just…” she giggled, “I knew it! I knew you were up to something. Sneaking around, cozying up to Zathar and Corin. I was so sure you were spying but nobody believed me!” She crossed her arms over her chest and shot me a glare but it didn’t have much impact because her lips twitched and then she giggled again.
“And this… Amuses you, why? Because I was terrible at my job and didn’t fool you?
” I frowned but worry was starting to slough away like a good skin molting.
She wasn’t mad, and she wasn’t injured. That was good, but her reaction still didn’t make a whole lot of sense to me.
My tangled feelings were hard to decipher, but one thing I was certain of, I was proud of her for figuring it out when nobody else had.
She was starting to sober, but a smile was still gracing her sexy, pink mouth. “I guess I’m just happy that I was right and that you told me. I was not in a good place when we first met, and I found it hard to trust my own observations, you know? At first, I was really paranoid about everything.”
Ah, that I understood. She was right, when I’d first arrived at Haven, she had not left the caves for more than a few minutes a day.
I’d heard whispers that some thought she’d been scared of a dragon snatching her from the air, which was ridiculous, Ses would never and he was the only one there.
She’d been very distrustful and scared; anxious all the time.
Now that I knew what she’d been through, and the betrayal and loss she’d experienced, I could understand that.