33. Stitches
STITCHES
I paced the living room. Cadence finally fell asleep minutes before. Sin returned home through the window in his room. I’d heard him come in. Instead of going to him, I let him have this one.
“Church is coming,” Ashes said, yawning. “He should be here any minute.”
I nodded tightly and didn’t say anything. Church had texted once in the last twenty-four hours, saying Sirena was OK, but he wanted to stay with her. We’d really had no reason to tell him to come home because we needed her as much as we needed Sin, so we stayed behind to keep the peace.
But then Sin dipped overnight after sitting silently on the couch while Cady cried beside him. Neither spoke to the other. The tension was so thick it made me sick to my stomach.
The front door opened, and Church came in wearing his dark jacket. His hair was a mess from sleep and the wind.
I stopped pacing and watched him take off his winterwear before he came deeper into the room and settled into his chair. I sank onto the L of the couch and waited for him to speak.
“Church?” Ashes called out tentatively.
Church blinked and seemed to come back to the moment. I watched him rub the back of his neck. He sighed.
“What?” I demanded. “What do you need to talk about?”
When it was big, he’d rub his neck. I knew my fucking brother.
“I have news,” he finally said, clearing his throat. “I need you both to keep an open mind.”
I ground my teeth, wondering what fresh hell he was going to spring on our asses.
“As you know, I spent the night with Sirena. That means, by default, I spent it with Asylum and Shadow.” He shifted in his seat.
I raised my brows at his words and glanced at Ashes, who sat forward, his brows crinkled.
“Sirena was OK. She was upset, but once she calmed down, everything seemed fine.” Church raked his fingers through his hair.
“Good. That’s good,” I said, nodding.
“Yeah. It’s a shock for sure, but I was still worried,” Ashes murmured, flipping his lighter open and closed five times before the flame burst out. Then he restarted his ritual.
“Right.” Church licked his lips. “Listen, I made a deal with Shadow and Asylum that we need to discuss.”
I glanced at Ashes, who looked uneasy for a moment. Church making deals always scared the shit out of me. The fact that he was now referring to Bryce as Shadow had me on the edge of my seat.
Church went quiet again for a long time. “Get Sin. He needs to be here for this.”
I hesitated momentarily before getting up and going to Sin’s room. I knocked on the door before cracking it open to see him lying in his bed, staring at the ceiling.
“Church wants you. It’s about Sirena.”
“Is she OK?” He sat up immediately, his voice wavering.
“Just come out, OK?”
He got to his feet and followed me to the living room. He sat next to Ashes on the couch and didn’t say a damn word. Church continued as if he’d not stopped talking.
“I learned some stuff last night. Sister Devon’s disappearance was at the hands of Asylum and Shadow. They killed her. They cut her body up and fed her to the wolves in the forest,” Church said.
“Bryce did that?” I rubbed my eyes. “Are you sure?”
“Yes.” Church sat back in his chair and steepled his fingers. “Because of that and what I witnessed with Sirena yesterday and overnight, I’ve agreed to him joining us.”
I blinked rapidly at his words and looked at Ashes and Sin. Ashes nodded wordlessly. Sin rested his elbows on his knees and stared at Church.
“Sinclair? Issues?” Church challenged.
“No,” Sin murmured. “She deserves to be happy.”
“Ashes? Stitches?” Church looked at us.
“Is she coming home?” Ashes ventured, glancing at Sin. “I’m fine with it if she comes home.”
“She is. Eventually. Malachi?” Church fixed his gaze on me.
I blew out a breath. “I’m not a fan of the guy, but I did tell her that she could, so it is what it is. If he sucks, I want to be the one to kick his fucking teeth in.”
Church inclined his head at me. “Permission granted.”
“I also extended the invitation to Asylum,” Church continued. “He declined.”
“What?” I asked, surprised. “Why?”
“He says he has more things he needs to do before he joins. A few seem to have to do with Sin.” Church fixed his gaze on Sin, who shifted and stared at the floor. “Care to elaborate?”
“No.” Sin shook his head. “I don’t know what I have to do with any of it. He loves Sirena. I don’t know shit about his secrets.”
Church nodded, seeming to accept the answer. “Sin?”
“Yeah?”
“Sirena is coming home soon. I expect you on your knees, begging her to take your ass back.”
Sin finally looked up, his eyes rimmed in red. “I-I can’t, man?—”
Church pulled his knife out and stabbed it violently into the table next to his chair. “Then get your sorry fucking ass up, take this knife, and kill yourself. The only way out is death. If you are stupid enough to choose death over what you love, then you deserve to die.”
Sin’s eyes darted to the knife. “I don’t deserve her.”
“None of us do. Die or knees. No fucking negotiation. I’m not dealing with this shit. I’m calling today to have Cady’s pregnancy evaluated. Once we get a due date, we can find out who the fuck got her knocked up. If it’s you, you’ll do whatever she wants, short of fucking her again. And, to sweeten the deal, if you’re so fucking into having a kid, I grant you access to specter for a child, provided she’s OK with it.”
“What?” Sin’s voice cracked.
“You fucking heard me, Sinclair. If you want a kid, I will set my desires aside for you. I will let you ask Sirena for this gift. If she agrees, then you can have this guarantee of a biological family you seem to want so desperately.”
Sin visibly swallowed. Ashes rubbed his back, not saying a damn word.
“Stitches? Good with that?” Church looked at me.
“I’m good with it,” I said, nodding. “I just ask that kids are way down the fucking road, man. We’re too young for all that, and I want to have some fun once we get shit sorted.”
“Agreed.” Church inclined his head at me. “Sin? Knees or knife?”
Sin was quiet for so long, I wasn’t sure he would answer. Finally, he parted his lips and whispered, “Knees.”
“Good. You better fucking beg her, too. She’s been through hell over this shit.”
Sin nodded wordlessly, his legs bouncing as he stared at the floor.
I breathed out and caught Ashes’s eye. He gave me a tiny smile, letting me know he was just as relieved as I was.
“Furthermore,” Church continued. “I let Asylum eat Sirena out last night. I watched her come for him.”
I glanced at Sin and Ashes again for a reaction.
“Any problems with that?” Church challenged.
“No,” I said immediately. “I saw what he was like with her in the facility. He loves her. He loves her even if he needs time, so I’m good with it.”
“I’m… OK, too, I guess,” Ashes said, stopping the flipping of his lighter lid.
“I know he cares about her,” Sin mumbled. “I’m fine with it. He’s a weirdo, but he is a good guy.” He paused and rubbed his chin. “What if Sirena won’t take me back?” Vulnerability laced through his voice. “I mean…shit’s fucked. Cady…a-a baby?—”
“Enough,” Church’s voice boomed out. “Fucking enough , Sinclair. Stop the goddamn what-ifs. What if the fucking sky suffocates us tomorrow? What if the ground opens and swallows us whole? What’s done is done. You can’t change it, so you fucking deal with it. Got it?”
Sin nodded, his Adam’s apple bobbing.
“She loves you,” I murmured, looking at Sin. “Sirena loves you. Talk to her. She’ll take you back. She left to give you the space you needed. We trusted her to come back, and she is. Pretty sure that’ll include coming back to you if you tell her you want her. Church is right. You need to stop worrying. I get it, man. I do. I freaked out as well, but it’s Sirena. Our girl . She’s never leaving us for good. I trust in that now. I was terrified before, but now I get it. Do you get it?”
“I get it,” he whispered, wiping at his eyes. “I just don’t know how to approach her after all this shit.”
“Take your time,” Ashes said gently. “She’ll go at your speed. I know she will.”
Sin sniffled but nodded.
“OK, now that we have that shit sorted.” Church pulled out a joint. Ashes reached out and lit it for him. Church took a hit and blew out the smoke.
Cady came down the stairs then and moved to sit next to me on the couch.
“What the fuck do you want?” Church grumbled at her before taking another drag from his joint.
“I wanted to know if Sirena is OK,” she said as she twisted her fingers nervously in front of her.
“She’s fine,” Church said.
“That’s it? She’s just fine?”
“What the fuck else do you want me to say? What more do you want to know?” Church glared at her.
She shook her head. “You don’t need to be such an asshole.”
Church let out a mirthless laugh. “Fuck off, Cadence. You’re in my house, remember?”
“And I don’t fucking want to be!” she shouted, getting to her feet and glaring at him.
“Enough!” I yelled, standing up and forcing her to sit back on the cushion. “Fucking enough! I’m sick of all the tension and shit here. I can’t stand it. It’s driving me goddamn nuts.” I exhaled. “Claws, you’re here because Sirena wants you here. We want you here despite how it may seem. Whether any of us likes it or not, you’re family now, so fucking deal with it.”
She said nothing and stared down at the floor.
“Can we just keep the damn peace?” I whispered. “Sirena is coming home eventually. She’s not going to want to come home to this shit. So please. Everyone get along. OK?”
“OK,” Cady whispered.
“Church?” I looked at him.
“Fine,” he said. “For now. No more boo-hooing. I’m sick of looking at your sour fucking face.”
“I’m pregnant, you dick! How the fuck do you want me to look? Happy? Over-fucking-joyed? My sister’s boyfriend may have gotten me knocked up. You want pure goddamn excitement on my face?” Cady shouted.
I groaned and rubbed my eyes.
Sin stood and moved to sit next to Cady. She tensed at his nearness.
“Hey, I’m feeling pretty shitty too,” Sin mumbled. “You’re not the only one going through this. I know you don’t want to be pregnant. Fuck, I don’t want you to be. It’s happening, though. I need Sirena to come home to us. Please. I’m begging you to get along and try.”
“I am trying. It’s just hard,” she choked out. “I don’t know what to do.”
“Then just… be,” Sin said gently, reaching for her. I watched as he pulled her into his arms and hugged her. She sobbed softly into his chest.
“I don’t know what you want to do with the baby, but if it’s mine, I’ll be there for it,” Sin said thickly. “I won’t run and leave you alone in it. I’ll take care of it if you want to keep it. I’ll help. It was a price I’d pay again to save Sirena. I would. For what it’s worth, I’m fucking sorry.”
Cady sobbed louder and clung to Sin.
“You two should talk,” Ashes said softly.
“Take her to your room, Sinclair,” Church said. “You two do need to air shit out. It’ll be less tense here once you do.”
Sin hesitated for a moment before he helped Cady to stand and led her to his bedroom. None of us spoke until the clicking of his door sounded out.
“What the fuck,” I groaned, tugging at my hair.
“Keep the faith,” Ashes muttered. “It’s all we can do at this point.”
“That and pray to whoever the fuck is willing to grant wishes that Sin didn’t knock her up,” Church said, pulling his phone out.
He finished his joint. I watched as he pressed the keypad a few times before putting the phone to his ear.
“Hey. It’s Dante Church. I need your help with something.”
I looked to Ashes, who appeared exhausted.
“I can’t wait until this shit is over,” I muttered.
“Same,” he said, yawning again. “Dibs on Sirena sleeping in my room the first night she’s back.”
“Fuck you. I called dibs?—”
“Malachi, you have to say that shit out loud with your whole chest, not whisper it into your head.”
I threw a couch pillow at him, making him laugh.
I cracked an actual smile for the first time in weeks.
It would have felt better if my angel were here with me, though.
Soon.
Soon is what kept me from going crazy.
Well, crazier than I already was.