4. Ryan
Ryan
I spent the next few days on tenterhooks. Waiting for Dominic to make some snide comment about the bruises he’d seen on me, or for Max to make some shitty remark about blaming my problems on him.
But neither of them said a word. Max had gone back to acting like I didn’t exist. Dominic wasn’t much better. It wasn’t like he’d spoken to me frequently before, but this complete silence was new.
Didn’t stop him staring at me. The first few times he’d done it, I’d glared back. If the fucker thought he could intimidate me then he could jog on. I might have been scared of just about everyone, but I wasn’t scared of Dominic.
Realistically, I knew I should be. He could flatten me with a single punch.
My lack of fear wasn’t because I didn’t believe that could happen.
It definitely could. Like my brother, Dominic was more of a‘punch first, ask questions later’ kind of guy.
I didn’t doubt that one day I’d find myself on the wrong side of his fists.
No. My absence of fear had nothing to do with that. It was because I had no room for fear. How could I, when just the sight of Dominic’s face irritated the fuck out of me? The simmering resentment was now a pressure cooker of fury just waiting to explode.
I had no idea where it had come from, either. I mean, sure, he’d always got on my nerves. Was I pissed he’d caused an irreparable rift between me and Max? Sure.
But none of that accounted for how my blood pressure soared whenever I caught him staring at me. How my skin seemed to burn whenever we were in the same room. How my heart pounded in my chest and my hands curled into fists.
I didn’t understand it. Any of it. Dominic’s presence was bringing something new out in me.
I didn’t like it.
In fact, I fucking hated it.
The single time we’d interacted was last night. He’d shoved past me in our hall, lifting his hand to open the front door.
The flash of red had me speaking before thinking. “What happened to your knuckles?”
He froze for a split second before turning his back to me fully. “Don’t worry about it, Shadow.”
I shouldn’t worry about it. I hated him. It wasn’t the first time I’d seen him with bloodied knuckles. It wasn’t even the tenth. Dominic’s temper was a thing to behold. Couple that with how often he and Max got into trouble, I was more likely to see them bruised than not.
For some reason I couldn’t fathom, seeing it left me with a hollow sensation in my stomach. A feeling that only intensified after I subtly checked out my twin’s hands later that night to see unmarred skin.
Why would Dominic have been fighting without Max? That literally never happened. They did everything together, including settling grievances.
It was after lunch and I was walking from the library to my physics class. I’d taken to spending my breaks and free periods in there. Not because I was behind on my studies, but because it was staffed. It was one of the few places I could let down my guard, knowing I couldn’t be targeted.
At least, not in a physical way. There were still shitty or sly comments muttered by some of the other kids, but I was used to ignoring those.
The beatings were another story. After the last one, I wasn’t keen to repeat the experience.
Five months and two weeks until freedom.
My stomach sank as two of the boys from the other week stepped directly into my path. Fuck. Apparently the universe was going to make me suffer as much as possible before I got to escape this hellhole.
They looked like they’d been in a few more fights since they’d attacked me. From the bruises around their eyes and their split lips, I was guessing one of their victims had fought back.
Bitterness bubbled in my throat. Not everyone was too chickenshit to stand up for themselves. Not like me. Fucking spineless, that’s what you are.
I wished I could say that this time would be different. That maybe I’d find some of the courage I had when it came to Dominic and tell these fuckers where to go.
But I had none. Instead, I braced myself for them to grab me.
That wasn’t what happened.
No, the one on the left went pale as he spotted me, grabbing the other’s arm. The second one’s eyes widened as he took a step back.
Without a word, they turned tail and ran away.
I’m not talking about a little jog either. They full-on sprinted in the other direction.
I gaped after them. What the fuck?
I was still wondering about it later when I got home from art class. It made no sense. Why would they run from me, of all people? It wasn’t like I’d dobbed them in to anyone. No one knew they’d beaten seven bells out of me.
It made no sense.
The house was blissfully quiet as I toed off my shoes and hung up my bag. Mum was in bed, Dad down in his shed again.
As for the troublesome twosome? They were nowhere to be seen. Thank fuck. I was too tired and confused to deal with their bullshit tonight.
Exhausted as I was, I couldn’t go straight to bed. My conscience wouldn’t let me. I trudged into the kitchen to unload the dishwasher. Mum had filled it and put it on earlier, but if I emptied it now, she wouldn’t have to do it in the morning.
After that was done, a quick check of the tumble dryer showed me that there was a load to be folded. My shoulders protested but I pushed through. It’d only take five minutes, then I could shower and pass out.
It was actually a full hour before I finally hit the stairs. I’d just stacked the folded washing on the table when I noticed something leaking from the fridge. I opened it up to discover a carton of apple juice on its side, the lid not fully screwed on.
I’d give you three guesses who was to blame, but you’d only need two.
Fatigue weighed on my shoulders as I stepped into my bedroom. It fled immediately at the sight that greeted me. “What the fuck are you doing in here?”
Dominic didn’t turn around from where he was sat in the window. He just took another drag of his cigarette before blowing the smoke into the night sky. “Technically I’m not in your room.”
I shut the door behind me quietly before glaring at him. “Last I checked, the windowsill was part of my room.”
Dominic shrugged. “Over half my body is out of the room, so it doesn’t count.”
My nostrils flared. A distant part of me questioned why I was bothering to argue with him. I couldn’t help it though. This…warped confidence I had around him, it wasn’t healthy.
That didn’t stop it being fucking addictive.
“You must’ve crossed my room to get there.”
He took a final drag of his cigarette before flicking it out into the night. “Nope. Climbed up the porch.”
My ire faltered at his stupidity. “You didn’t.”
The porch wasn’t a ‘porch’ in the traditional sense. It was a flat roof held up by two wooden ladders that had been painted white. Years ago, before Mum had been worn down by work, she’d sit under it with the neighbours and drink tea. The ladders were ornamental only.
Well, that wasn’t strictly true. Max and I had both climbed up there a time or two, back before Dominic was in our lives. Being right outside my bedroom window, they’d played a big part in games where we pretended to be soldiers or explorers.
That was until Mum caught us and we got the bollocking of a lifetime. Seriously, I couldn’t remember another time she’d been so angry. She’d yelled at both of us for being reckless.
Looking back, she had a point. This whole estate had been built after the Second World War in response to the housing crisis. They had been designed to last for a decade.
Sixty years had passed and they were still standing. Barely. Our windows didn’t close fully and we had no central heating. There were more loose floorboards than there were stable ones, and the less said about the damp issues the better.
Most of all? Those porches weren’t up to holding the weight of eight-year-old boys, let alone a muscled eighteen-year-old like Dominic.
It was funny thinking about that memory now.
I’d been devastated that Mum was so upset, but all it had taken was a whispered suggestion from Max and we’d been off on the next adventure.
It was more like a dream than a memory. Things had changed so much that I couldn’t quite believe we’d once been close.
Maybe I’d imagined it.
“It’s fine.” Dominic smirked arrogantly, slipping over the sill and fully into the room. “I’m in one piece, aren’t I?”
My shoulders stiffened at his proximity. “Why are you here?”
He shrugged again, turning his focus to my desk. Flicking the Newton’s cradle, he watched the balls click back and forth. “I’m bored.”
“Then go and bother Max.”
“He’s busy.” Dominic didn’t look up from the cradle. “Figured I’d hang here instead.”
“Gotta love being second best,” I muttered under my breath.
I should probably have made him leave before I went to brush my teeth, but I was too fucking tired.
Between revising, my extra art classes, and my paper round, I was running on fumes.
Sighing, I made my way to the door. “Don’t fuck with my stuff. ”
I took my time in the bathroom, hoping Dominic would take the hint and leave. Whatever luck I’d had earlier in the day when those bullies ran away had clearly expired now. I went back into my room to find Dominic reclined on my bed.
“Do make yourself comfortable,” I said, sarcasm dripping from the words.
“I have,” Dominic said, his eyes closed. His hands were under his head and he looked…peaceful. My eye began to twitch. Trust Dominic to be completely calm while making me so frustrated that my body was doing things without my permission. “Your bed is way more comfy than Max’s.”
Something uneasy slithered in my gut. “I figured you always crashed on the floor.”
He peeled one eyelid open. “Why the fuck would I sleep on the floor when Max has a double bed?”
“And yet you think I’m the gay one.”
I had no idea where I got the balls to say that.