21. Ryan #2
More so than he already was. The snide comments about us spending time together had tailed off, but I felt Max watching us sometimes. There was something in his narrowed gaze that was…off. Like he knew more than he was letting on.
And that he didn’t like it one bit.
There was a light tapping at my door. “Ryan? You there?”
I frowned. Max never usually bothered knocking.
Fuck. Maybe something has happened with Dominic.
Gut twisting, I yanked the door open. “What’s up?”
Max’s gaze went behind me, sweeping over my room. His lips thinned. “So he’s not with you.”
My heart leapt into my throat and I had to remind myself to play it cool. “Who?”
Max shouldered past me with an eye-roll. “Don’t play dumb, Ryan. It doesn’t suit your golden boy personality. Where’s Dominic?”
I gritted my teeth. Guessed we were back on that again. “I thought he was with you.”
“Nope,” he said curtly, fingering one of my textbooks. Like Dominic, Max didn’t seem to give a shit about the upcoming exams. “We were meant to game at Josh’s, but he never showed.”
The unease in my stomach spread. “And he didn’t call or message you?”
Max didn’t look at me as he shook his head. His shoulders were tight, a muscle jumping in his jaw. “Figured he was with you and got distracted.”
I wasn’t the only one worried. It had my tongue loosening, revealing more than I otherwise would’ve. “No. He told me he was going to Josh’s to see you. I texted him earlier and he hasn’t replied.”
I waited for the cutting remark. The scorn Max usually threw at me about Dominic. But it never came.
“I went by the chip shop,” Max said, still not looking at me. “He wasn’t there either. Knocked at his place and his dad hadn’t seen him.”
“Shit.” I paced my room, tugging at my hair. “This isn’t like him, right?”
I knew it wasn’t, but I was clutching at straws.
“No,” Max said quietly. “It’s not. Dominic would’ve told one of us.”
His eyes met mine, and in that moment, we were both on the same side. Not competing for Dominic, but worried for him.
“Okay,” I said, trying to organise my thoughts. “Go grab the torches from Dad’s shed. The ones we use when the electric goes. I’ll chuck some shoes on while you do that and we’ll go looking for him.”
Max’s fingers twitched. “Do you think we’re overreacting?”
“Do you think that?”
“No.” Max grabbed at his hair, exactly as I had earlier. In moments like this, looking at him was like looking in a mirror. “This is weird. Something’s wrong. I can tell.”
Me too. I didn’t say that. Max was already worried enough, and for some reason, I didn’t want to make it worse.
“Go and get the torches,” I repeated curtly.
Max disappeared out of my door. I went straight to the wardrobe and grabbed one of my hoodies. I shrugged it on before taking out one of Dominic’s as well. It wasn’t cold, but who knew what he might need when we found him.
If we find him.
We would. Max and I were never united over anything. Now that we were, there’d be no stopping us. Besides, we were probably worrying for nothing. It wasn’t like he’d been missing long—just a few hours.
But this was Dominic. He didn’t just up and disappear without saying something to one of us.
I strode for the door, but a noise at my window stopped me.
Relief slammed into me at the sight of Dominic on the other side of the glass. But as I drew close, the expression on his face had it dimming. His eyes were red-rimmed, and there was a darkness there I’d only seen once before.
“Are you okay?” I asked as I unlatched the window. Stupid question really. Dominic was far from okay. “What happened? Max and I were about to go looking for you.”
His haunted expression shifted to show the tiniest amount of confusion. “Together?”
“We were worried,” I said simply. “Let me get him.”
“No.” Dominic’s hand on my wrist stopped me. His throat bobbed as he swallowed. “Tell him I’m okay, but I can’t see him. Not right now.”
I hovered. As much as I loved that he’d come to me over my twin, I couldn’t erase the memory of the stress on Max’s face. “Really?”
He nodded. “Just need you, Shadow. Please.”
“Okay,” I said softly, steering him to my bed. He fell heavily onto the edge of the mattress, his shoulders bowing forwards. “Wait here. I’ll be right back.”
Max was running up the stairs when I stepped outside my door, torches clutched in one hand. “Got them.”
“He’s here,” I said quickly, keeping my voice low so as to not disturb our parents.
Relief shone on Max’s face. “Thank fuck.”
He went to go to my door, but I blocked his path. “You can’t go in right now, Max. He’s okay physically, but he’s upset.”
“So?” Max glared at me. “You think I give a shit about seeing him like that? Move. I need to know he’s okay.”
Fuck. There was no smugness now, just pity. If the roles had been reversed, I’d hate to be shut out here and not able to see Dom with my own eyes.
But this was what he wanted. I wasn’t going to let him go.
Taking a deep breath, I planted my feet. “He doesn’t want to see you right now, Max.”
He reeled back a step, his eyes widening. “What?”
“I’m sorry,” I whispered. I meant it too. I hadn’t felt torn between the two before, and it fucking sucked. “He just wants to be on his own.”
“On his own,” Max rolled the words around in his mouth, his lips curling in distaste. “But with you. Right?”
I didn’t say anything. I didn’t need to. Max knew it was my window Dominic had climbed through, not his.
“I see.” Max’s face shuttered. “Good to know I’m replaceable.”
I stepped after him, my chest twisting. “Max, it’s not like that. What Dom and I share, it’s different.”
“You’re telling me,” he said bitterly, turning his back on me. “I’m going to Amy’s.”
He got to the bottom of the stairs before speaking again, not looking back. “Tell him…tell him I hope everything’s okay. That I’m here when he’s ready to talk.”
“I will. Thanks, Max.”
He looked back then, not bothering to conceal the hatred in his eyes. “Don’t thank me, Ryan. I’m not doing it for you.”
No, he wasn’t. But he was doing it for Dominic, and that was good enough for me.