Chapter 18 Savi #2
Taking a deep breath, I run my hand through my hair and wipe the rest of the tears away.
I don’t know why, but something tells me this is the last time Todd will get any more of my tears.
Sharing this with them was something I didn’t know I needed to do.
Even though I know Knox would have held this secret until the day I died, it feels good to let the girls in.
I didn’t realize until now how much that weighed on me to keep it from them.
“That’s why I asked Knox for a night,” I say, deciding to lay it all out.
“Since that night, I’ve never felt safe giving that part of myself to someone.
I always completely panic when it comes down to the actual sex part.
Knox is the only one I’ve ever felt safe with, and I knew he could replace the painful memories for me. ”
“But Tristan…” Eve says, looking confused.
“Was a horny high school jock,” I chuckle.
“It didn’t take much to play the ‘I’m not ready’ card, and eventually I started distracting him by pleasing him in other ways.
Back then, I thought I was in love, and it would just take time for his touch to feel right.
And he did make me feel safe, but in a different way.
When I look back now, I realize that I stayed with him because I used him as a shield.
As long as I had my boyfriend at a party with me or at school events, no other guys would mess with me.
Tristan was captain of the football team, big and strong…
everyone loved him and wouldn’t dare touch his girl.
He made me feel safer in crowds,” I admit, seeing the truth for what it is now.
“I’m glad you told us, Savi,” Sophia says softly as she soothingly rubs my arm.
“This sisterhood is a safe space. We will always be here for you…for each other,” Lyla smiles at each of us in the circle as we nod in agreement.
I feel so much relief now that I don’t have to hide anything from them anymore. I somehow feel even closer to them, mending a piece of me I didn’t realize until now how much it needed to be healed.
By the time the girls leave, I’m feeling a nice buzz from the wine and more relaxed than I’ve felt in years. We ended up spending the rest of the evening on a more lighter note, talking about anything and everything.
As always, there was a lot of laughter and more tears were shed, but this time it was because something was said that was so damn funny we couldn’t stop the laughing fits that got hold of us.
Checking my watch, I see I have thirty minutes until Knox is supposed to call. Giddiness rises in my body, and I can’t help the excitement I feel just to hear his voice again. Even though I saw him this morning, it’s crazy how much I already miss him.
Putting my hair in a messy bun, I decide to take a quick shower before wrapping myself in a plush, white towel. Even though my makeup is subtle, I decide to leave it on for our call.
Feeling a little wild, I add a little more smoky eye and top it off with my favorite red lipstick. I could tell he liked it when I wore it at the bar, remembering how he wouldn’t stop glancing down at my lips.
Praying he actually meant what he said when he wanted me naked for him, and I won’t be the only one following through with our demands, I drop the towel and crawl into bed.
I prop my iPad next to me, wanting a bigger screen to watch him. My phone just isn’t going to cut it, and I don’t want to miss a thing.
Glancing at the time, I have two minutes to spare as I watch it get closer to ten.
The chances of him calling me at the exact hour are slim.
Most guys don’t text or call when they say they are going to.
It could be ten thirty before I even hear from him or, worse, he forgot and went out with the guys instead.
9:59…
He knew exactly what he was doing, giving me the time and telling me what to do. Sitting here naked for him and anticipating his phone call has me on full body alert. I’m already getting aroused just by thinking he could be doing the exact same thing at this moment.
10:00…
I hold my breath as the clock turns ten, and not a second later, my iPad lights up with a FaceTime call.
Right on time, Mr. Stone. You definitely get points for that, I note.
Let’s see if he followed through on my demands.
Taking a deep breath, I hit the green answer button and lie back against the headboard, spreading myself wide for him.
His body comes into view, and a slow smile appears on my face. Like me, he’s propped up against the headboard, his bare chest still wet from a shower. What I wouldn’t give to reach out and be able to touch him through the screen as I take in the sight before me.
My eyes follow down each ab divot before I see his hand stroke down the length of him and back up again. He’s already fully hard and glistening on top. I lick my lips subconsciously, and my name is softly growled out as I shoot my eyes to his.
Deep blue eyes are ablaze with hunger as we lock together with a force that has me parting my lips on a gasp.
“You listened.” His eyes roam over me, and a trail of heat flushes my body as he marks every inch of me that his eyes touch. I’m under his spell right now as I feel a deep need to do whatever he asks of me, knowing damn well I’m his for the taking.