Chapter Thirty-Eight #2
“Cadian,” I said again. He kissed me again, more fervently and with more passion.
I tried to return his kisses, but he was taking over.
I made my mind focus on the feel of his lips, closing my eyes and imagining loving that boy, imagining him being the one, anything to get me to pull it off.
I tried to focus on kissing him, shielding my melody, and yet talking to him through my melody.
I communicated to him that I was enjoying our kisses.
But how was I going to steal his brother’s melody from around his neck?
I compartmentalized my brain, my thoughts, and my feelings.
Keil had taught me how. We Terrans, because of our soul’s melodies, could compartmentalize our lives into boxes within our brain so that we only accessed what we wanted, when we wanted them, right?
I was pushing my abilities that day, putting me through a real life test. The part of my brain that I unlocked for Cade was the present one where he kissed me and I tried to kiss him back.
The part I blocked from him held my true feelings and my true desires of stripping him of his brother's soul.
I wondered how I had ever thought that my scheme could have even worked as the strain of it all started to really tire me out, and my head felt so heavy.
He sat up, and I slowly moved my fingers down his back. He smiled at me, his brown eyes alight with passion.
“I knew you would come around, Emma.” He touched a strand of hair on my face; then he touched my lips. “You are light—You chase away the darkness,” he whispered, his breath on my neck.
“Your soul is so beautiful,” I whispered, trying to play the part, and it was true; it was beautiful, but it wasn’t his.
“So is yours,” he said before sitting me up and kissing me again. “Do you want me to call you, ‘darling’?” he asked, his breaths heavy and labored on my skin.
Of course, I didn't want him to. I would never want that. That was what Shad called me, and it was only reserved for him. To keep up the ruse, however, I said: “You can call me whatever you like, Cadian.”
At an angle, as he kissed my neck, and I could see the back of the chain that held the crystal. It was a simple circle, with a bar going through it. It would be easy enough to make that come loose as I stroked his back.
“My light,” he whispered against my skin. “You are my light,”
I squealed for joy at the victory of finding the clasp, scolding myself for letting it out.
“You like that, Emma?” He pulled away as he looked into my eyes.
I smiled and nodded. He traced more kisses down my throat and neck.
Soon after, his kisses left my neck and came back to my lips.
I was brave and touched the necklace backing, trying to free it.
I realized that he would feel it fall down his chest, so I moved closer to him so there was no space between us, between our bodies.
The necklace would stay there, and I could slowly move it and shove it into my pocket.
As his kisses tried to deepen and his hands tried to wander, it was getting harder and harder to juggle everything.
I removed the necklace and tried to slowly let it drop between us.
Finally, it was in my hand and I tugged it into my pocket.
Feeling victorious, I wanted to scream. Instead, I bit Cade’s lip, by accident of course.
He moved away with a smirk on his face. “You like it rough, sweet?” He nearly growled with pleasure.
That’s when it happened; that’s when my melody wavered.
I was so tired; I was so exhausted from the training, from school, from the kisses and shielding part of my melody.
Suddenly, I was left unshielded. His eyes turned black as he moved off of the couch.
This was the only chance I had, and I was going to fight for it.
I jumped off the couch and ran around to the front door, grabbing Cade’s keys as I went.
I didn’t know how to drive a stick shift, but I didn’t care.
“Emma,” His voice was cool like a frozen mist on my neck. “Give it to me.”
I ran even faster, slipping on the stupid gravel driveway, cutting my hands when I fell and my bare feet as I ran. Why had I taken off my shoes and socks? “Emma, what do you think you are doing?” he called out as if I were a little girl, pretending to play some game.
“Get away from me,” I shouted as I unlocked the car door and got inside. I locked the door and saw him standing beside me. He had a key in his hand, too, and it clicked the door unlocked.
“I will say, you are pretty convincing,” he said, tugging me out of the car by my arm.
He pushed me against the hood as he searched for my one chance, my one hope at saving Shad.
He took the crystal and secured it around his neck with one hand.
My face was flush with the cold hood of his car; my whole body went frigid.
I had failed. I didn’t know what he would do to me, but I knew it wouldn't be good. For a few moments, as he spun me around, I wondered if he would take pity on me, if maybe he wasn’t as bad as I thought he was.
Maybe, with Shad's soul inside of him, he was better, or he could be better.
But his eyes were dark, and I felt the blackness of corruption along with the truth of my betrayal, seeping inside his soul, inside Shad's soul.
“You will regret what happened here tonight,” he said calmly.
“I already do,” I screamed and felt a pain shoot up my right arm. I looked down to see Cade held a knife and was cutting into my flesh.
“We don’t need your knight to come find us.” He dug into my flesh, and when he showed me something silver and small, that was when the realization hit me that he was taking out the tracker that Keil had placed in my arm, and with it, any chance I had of being saved.
“I tried to play nice, Emma, but if you are playing dirty; I will play dirty, too.”
As I lay on the hood of the car, I realized that because of my failure, Shad would die.
I had not been able to save him. I pictured him in my mind, laying so helplessly upon his bed, so close to death.
Tears dampened my face as I looked up toward the stars, which sprinkled across the night sky like shattered diamonds—so beautiful, even when broken—just like him. Just like Shad.