Chapter 8 #2
As they danced, his breath was hot against her cheek, her chest pressed tightly to his.
And the best part was, that had only been one of at least half a dozen slow dances they’d shared that night.
He hadn’t asked a single other woman to dance.
Just her. Her heart fluttered even now as she thought of it.
Ugh.
Gretchen shook herself out of her reveries, trying to shut down feelings she really should not be feeling in regard to Theo Storm. There were a million reasons why she should ignore this attraction to her boss, and zero reasons why she should succumb to it. The most they could ever be was friends.
The problem was, she was letting herself get swept away by all these new, unexpected, wonderful feelings because, for the first time in her life, she wasn’t afraid or lonely.
In five short weeks, she’d started to feel happy.
After a lifetime of shit, she couldn’t make herself push away something that felt so good.
New Gretchen had apparently kicked old Gretchen, with her trust issues and pessimism, to the curb.
Personally, she blamed the romance books she was addicted to, as well as the rom coms she’d been watching with Edith.
For so many years, her beloved books had truly felt like fiction because she was certain those beautiful relationships didn’t exist in the real world.
Now, as she watched Levi and Kasi together, and as she recalled the story Theo had told her about how his parents met, she found herself wanting to believe in love at first sight or touch.
Because there was no denying the second Theo had touched her hand the first day they met, her world had changed.
She tried to tell herself she needed to proceed with caution, because she’d thought Briggs was going to be the hero of her story and that she was in love with him.
Looking back now, she wasn’t so sure. She’d been eighteen years old, for pity’s sake.
She’d never been kissed, and she had been terribly, terribly lonely and scared.
What she felt for Briggs had been less about love and more about gratitude. Because she was grateful to be seen and wanted. Two things that hadn’t happened before he came along.
So, in reality, she knew nothing about love. Except that she wanted it. Desperately. But she couldn’t be an idiot about it—and she couldn’t let herself fall in love with Theo.
Period.
End of sentence.
He was her boss, and she needed this job.
On top of that, she needed time to sort her shit out.
Given the fact she was standing here, still comparing Briggs and Theo, proved her ex had done one hell of a number on her.
And that was after her abandonment issues, thanks to Dad and all the horrors inflicted by her mom and Ivan.
Talking to Edith was helping, but she was by no means healed, so it was time to put this unwise attraction to Theo in the rearview mirror.
Unfortunately—or fortunately—Theo was determined to spend as much time as possible with her, and while he wasn’t overtly coming on to her, there was definitely some flirting.
“There you are.”
Speak of the devil.
Gretchen’s stupid heart flickered the second she heard Theo’s voice. Turning, she smiled as he walked into the barn.
“Inventory all good?”
“Yep. Just finished. We got what we ordered, and I think it looks nice. I was taking a quick look around to make sure everything was okay for tomorrow’s meeting.”
Theo scanned the interior of the barn. “Tomorrow?”
“Jenny Wilson is coming to check out the space,” she said.
“That’s right. I forgot about that.”
Now that the barn was ready for business, they had posted an inquiry form on the website.
They’d already started getting some interest from people about renting.
Jenny Wilson was one of the first to bite.
She was hoping to use the barn three mornings a week for a yoga class she planned to offer, certain that the incredible view from the mountain would create a peaceful environment.
If things worked out, and Jenny rented the space, Gretchen was considering signing up for the early morning class herself.
She could use a little mindfulness in her life.
So far, they’d already booked two other events, including a family reunion and a spring wedding.
Gretchen, with Everett’s marketing help, had begun advertising the barn rental, and each day was bringing them more and more inquiries.
It was her personal goal to book an event for every single weekend by the end of next year.
She had no idea if it was feasible, but she was determined to give it all she had.
“It looks terrific in here,” Theo said, stepping over to plug in the web of twinkle lights. While it was midafternoon, the sky was overcast and dark. It was the perfect day to curl up on a couch under a blanket to read.
“What are you doing?”
“It’s dark in here. Besides, I like the look of them. Reminds me of my junior prom.” Theo walked to the middle of the floor to stand under them.
“Oh yeah?”
“Did you go to prom?” he asked.
She shook her head. There had been funds to buy her a dress if she wanted to go, but no one asked, and Briggs had told her it was too dangerous for her to be out that night, as too many teens got drunk and then behind the wheel of a car.
Fuck , she mentally chastised herself. Enough with Briggs already.
Theo gave her one of his charming grins, and the butterflies he set loose in her stomach took flight. “I went with Renee Cameron.”
“Let me guess. Cheerleader?” Gretchen teased.
Theo shook his head. “Nope. Renee was captain of the debate team and valedictorian of our class. Super-smart and sweet. I sat next to her in anatomy class, and she let me copy her homework whenever I forgot to do it.”
Gretchen laughed. “And how often was that?”
Theo wiggled his eyebrows. “I was sixteen years old with a strong aversion to being inside. Me and my brand-new driver’s license spent a lot of time cruising around town in my dad’s pickup truck with a bunch of my buddies, looking for girls or trouble. We weren’t picky about which.”
“What constituted trouble for you?”
Theo crossed his arms, drawing her attention to those beautiful, thick biceps of his. “Smoking cigarettes behind the school, sneaking beer from our folks, drag racing on the straight stretch of road behind Roscoe Prescott’s farm, shit like that.”
“Ohhhh. So you were a bad boy.”
“What do you mean were ?” Theo joked. “There’s nothing past tense about my bad boy ways.”
“Is that right?” she drawled.
He crooked his finger at her. “Come here, wallflower.”
She was, in fact, still hanging out next to the wall, foolishly thinking that keeping a distance would help her resist him.
But Gretchen was helpless to stop herself, so she walked closer.
She stopped a few feet away, and as was becoming his habit, he cut the distance, moving close enough that she had to tilt her head back slightly to look up at him.
His gaze dropped to her lips, and Gretchen resisted the urge to lick them.
She couldn’t remember the last time she’d been kissed without fear lacing the touch. Kissing had stopped being about her a long time ago and was simply one of the ways she tried to make a miserable, abusive man happy.
If she kissed Theo…
Kissing him would be all for her. Her desires. Her pleasure.
She’d bet every penny she had he was a great kisser.
Gretchen took a step away, needing to put space between them before she did something really stupid.
She cleared her throat. “Um. So, were you and Renee one of those high school power couples or something?”
Theo shook his head. “No. Truthfully, I needed a date for prom. It was the only time we ever went out. She was a little too nice for me.”
Gretchen narrowed her eyes. “Are you saying she wouldn’t put out?”
Theo barked a loud laugh. When she first arrived on the farm, his boisterous laughter had triggered her. Loud noises always reminded her of Briggs yelling or slamming doors. After five weeks of hearing Theo’s laughter almost daily, she was no longer shaken by it.
“Jesus,” Theo said. “While I liked to pretend I was a stud and lady killer in high school, the truth is, I probably would have shit myself if Renee wanted to have sex with me. What I meant about her being too nice is, she wouldn’t even let me hold her hand or kiss her, and despite the fact prom didn’t end until midnight, she still had a ten o’clock curfew because she had to be up early for church the next day.
I wound up driving her home, then going back to the school gym to finish the dance stag. ”
“You’re starting to sound less like a bad boy,” she teased.
He ruffled her hair, something else she was becoming accustomed to, along with his shoulder bumps, and the way he placed his hand on the small of her back, and how he always offered a hand to help her in and out of his truck during their driving lessons.
Theo found countless ways to touch her, and while it had taken a bit of practice at the beginning not to stiffen or flinch, now she adored his sweet touches as much as his laugh.
“I was a late bloomer when it came to sex,” Theo confessed. “Didn’t lose my virginity until I was seventeen. Fell madly in love with Sandy Jenkins, and the two of us dated most of our senior year.”
Theo had proven himself to be one of those open-book types of people, often recounting stories from his past, even embarrassing ones. She’d discovered there was nothing he wouldn’t share if she asked. “Why did that relationship end?”
“Sandy went off to college and I stayed in Gracemont. Neither of us was interested in a long-distance romance. Especially considering she had no plans to return to town after getting her degree, and I was never leaving the farm. She lives outside of D.C. now with her husband and three kids.”
“She was your first love?”