Chapter 52 NOAH
NOAH
“How are your legs?” Gabe asks as we stand in line for Micah’s coffee kiosk. He seems a little jittery, eyes darting around, but overall, he’s doing well considering the amount of people standing close and chattering away.
We’ve just finished our first run since the lake. We didn’t go anywhere near it, which I’m glad about. I don’t know if I’m ready to go there again. He didn’t mention going, but I saw him eyeing the roads leading to it as we passed.
I step closer to him and wrap my arms around him from behind. I step up on my toes, resting my chin on his shoulder.
“All good, baby. Don’t worry about me.”
They’re fucking killing me. Some things never change, but I’ll take the horrendous shin splints for the rest of my life once Gabe is by my side.
“Next,” someone calls from the kiosk. I’ve actually never come before, but the last thing I expected was this man I don’t know eyeing Gabe, my Gabe, with obvious interest.
He’s about my height and looks lean. Dark hair in a tidy undercut. A neat, short beard frames his mouth. Warm olive skin, amber-brown eyes that slide over Gabe. His sleeves are rolled, forearms inked with fine linework. I decide I’ve already seen enough to know I don’t like this fucker.
I tighten my arms around Gabe on instinct, and his hands come up to my forearms.
“Gabriel Shaw,” the man croons.
Gabe laughs. “Hi, Micah.”
“Multiple visits in the last few weeks, lucky me,” Micah flirts. What a stupid fucking name. Can’t this idiot see I’m right here?
Gabe looks at me over his shoulder, his lips pressed together to keep from laughing when he sees whatever look is on my face.
“Micah, this is my boyfriend, Noah.” He gives me a peck on the lips, and I relax. Just a little, though.
Micah lets out an overly dramatic sigh before replying, “Of course it is.”
When he looks back at us, he's smiling warmly. “What can I get you lovebirds?”
“Lavender-honey tea,” Gabe says excitedly, looking to me in question, and I bob my head. “Two, please.”
A couple of minutes later, we’re walking down Main with our drinks, it’s sweet and floral, and has an unexpectedly pleasant spearmint flavor.
“Do you like it?” Gabe asks.
I take another sip. “Love it,” I tell him, then ask the question that’s been on my mind. “Why did you avoid the kiosk for so long?”
He exhales, looking back at the kiosk. “I don’t know, I guess… Well, I was nervous about being around people. And”—he pauses, looking down at his tea—“I think I was punishing myself. Keeping myself from things I wanted.”
I put my arm around him, holding him to my side as we walk. “No more of that, baby. You never deserved punishment. You deserve to have everything you want.”
And I’ll make sure he never forgets that.
His teeth rake over his bottom lip as he smiles. It’s a little sad. “I’m starting to understand that. Therapy has opened my eyes to all the ways I was hurting myself. I… I want to be better to myself. I’m working on seeing myself in a better light.”
I plant a kiss on his cheek. “Good, you’re my favorite person, Gabe. You deserve only kindness and joy, even from yourself.”
He leans in to kiss me, it’s awkward as we walk, and we end up clicking teeth and laughing into each other’s mouths. I walk him to the front of Evergreen and take his tea, setting both cups down on the window ledge.
“Hey!” he protests, and I chuckle before cradling his face and kissing him hard, right on the street for all of Willowrun to see, including stupid fucking Micah.
When we break apart, Gabe is grinning. He shakes his head at me. “Okay, caveman, you done staking your claim?”
I kiss him again just to feel his smile against mine, taste his happiness. “Never,” I growl into the kiss, making him giggle as his fingers thread through my hair.
I step back and hand him his tea again. “See you later, baby.”
He’s smiling wide, dimple on display. Even now, he still gets that pretty blush when I call him baby.
“See you later, Blue.”
I slip my arms around him, trailing my fingers along his spine under his sweater. One of his hands rubs my back, the other is buried in my hair, holding me close.
We’re in the kitchen. I’m not scheduled for the gym today, and Gabe is taking the afternoon off.
He hired a part-time staff member, Marissa, to cover a couple of days a week so he could attend his therapy sessions and have some downtime.
His online sales have been doing well, and he has some future events booked, so he’s going to keep her on as long as he can.
He had a session this morning, and I never know how he’ll be when he comes back.
Usually, he’s just tired, but a few times, he’s been so upset, he’s spent the day and night crying.
It kills me seeing him like that. All I can do is be there for him.
I can’t take all the hurt away, no matter how much I wish I could.
Every time I hold him through it, though, I feel this spark of awareness in my chest, something telling me I was always meant to come back here, to Gabe.
I was made to be his, his support, his love. Whatever he needs.
“Are you okay?” he asks gently.
“Yeah,” I answer honestly. I bring my head back and look at his face. He’s always been gorgeous to me, but I can see the difference in him from when I first moved in—eyes brighter, face less gaunt.
“Just thinking,” I admit. “About us, about how happy I am that I came back to Willowrun. You’ve given me so much, Gabe.”
A little crease forms between his brows. I run my thumb over it, smoothing it out.
“You gave me what I’ve always craved since I was a child, what I spent all my time away from here searching for.”
“Which was?” he whispers.
I press my face into his neck. “Home. Family.”
He trembles in my hold, a small sniffle escaping him as he clutches me close, fingers tracing the tip of my compass tattoo. “Noah,” he breathes. “You give me everything I need and more. You guided me back to myself.”
I press my lips to the scar on his cheek. “Can we go lie down in bed for a bit?”
“Sure, tired?”
“Nah, just want to hold you,” I tell him.
He takes my hand and leads me to his bedroom. He lies down on his back on the bed, and I do the same, tapping my chest so he can come snuggle, like we always do. But he surprises me by tapping his chest, and his mouth tips into a cute little grin.
“You want me to lie on you?” I question, I haven’t even tried that since the first time I pressed my weight into him, and I saw the panic flash in his eyes.
He nods, eyes open and honest. “Yeah, I want to hold you.”
I roll toward him, slipping my arms around his middle and placing my head on his chest. His hand runs along my spine, and I settle in further. He lets out a contented sigh. My heart swells, feeling him under me. Knowing what it means.
He kisses the top of my head, soft lips and a warm ghosting of air. I’m floating.
“I was thinking,” he says, voice a little uncertain, “about rearranging the stock room in the shop a bit? I was originally thinking of a coffee station there, but maybe I could make space for a proper office instead. I need more room for packaging and stuff with online orders.”
I kiss his chest through his sweater. “You know,” I start, “we live in a two-bedroom apartment.”
“Yeah...?”
“I was thinking, maybe you could use my room for that stuff? Then you can still do a coffee station down the line.”
I feel him tense up, and for a long time he says nothing, so long that I have to lift my head to look at him, confused by his reaction. I wonder if I’m too heavy, or maybe lying on top of him like this is too much for him.
Gabe blinks, his expression flickering with something I can’t place. “Oh,” he says quickly. “Right… The gym’s doing great. So… Yeah, obviously you want your own space, then…if you’re moving out, I could just—”
“Wait, what?” I laugh, leaning up. “No. No. Definitely not that. Gabe, you would need to have me removed by force.” He laughs at me, but still looks unclear about what I’m saying.
“I was thinking your room could become our room. I don’t even remember the last time I slept in my room.
It’s been months. And I like waking up next to you. I want to keep waking up next to you.”
His face goes crimson. “Oh.”
“Yeah, oh.” I chuckle into his cheek, nuzzling against him. “Adorable,” I murmur, leaning in to kiss him. “That okay with you?”
He nods quickly, smile beaming, that dimple on show again. It’s coming out more and more these days. “Very okay. I’d like that.”
“Good,” I say as I snuggle back in. “Gabe?”
“Yeah?”
“Read to me?”
His soft laugh vibrates against me as he reaches for The Wayfarer’s Star.