Chapter 29
The next day, Kieran drags his feet through the motions of getting ready for the dreaded ‘quadruple date’.
Thankfully, they’re going to some regular Indian restaurant (Ash’s favorite, as it turns out).
Which is all nice and good, but it also means there are gonna be other people around.
Kieran’s not sure he wants to be associated with the rest of the gang, and have witnesses on top of it!
He steps out of the bathroom, steam billowing behind him.
He spends more time than he’d like to admit standing in front of the closet, deciding what to wear.
It’s not actually a date, he’s not sure why he’s overthinking it so much.
Meanwhile, sitting on top of the duffle bag shoved in the corner of the closet, Tequila is watching him with a suspicious gaze and a swishing tail.
“Shut up,” he tells her, which only makes her narrow her eyes. As he pulls out a pair of comfy looking jeans and a black tee, his hand brushes something soft. It turns out to be a dark-blue jumper, well-worn, slightly fraying at the neckline. No tags.
Uh-huh. Must be one of Ash’s creations. And it must be Kieran’s favorite thing to wear if the state of it is any indication. He runs the sleeve between his fingers, contemplating, then takes it off the hanger.
Ash pokes his head into the room just as Kieran drops the towel.
“Ready to go?”
“Jesus!” Kieran presses a hand over his heart. “Don’t do that! And yeah, gimme a sec. Just need to put these on.”
Ash’s gaze drops to the clothes—to the jumper. A small smile tugs at his lips. “Wearing your favorite, I see?”
Kieran flushes. “It’s chilly in the evenings.”
“Right.” He shows no indication that he intends to give Kieran privacy.
“What are you standing there for? Shoo.”
“Can’t I watch?”
“No! You’ve seen enough!”
Ash mutters something that sounds like ‘never enough’, but runs away when Kieran throws a shoe at him.
Freaking Ash, acting like his usual pervy self after being broody all day for no known reason. It’s been the most bizarre 24 hours, and that’s saying something.
Kieran still can’t quite believe what happened yesterday.
Ash had his mouth on him in a way Kieran never thought he’d allow, let alone enjoy, and then he’d just let Ash finish all over him, like it was nothing unusual.
And yeah, maybe for the future version of him that is true, but for him?
It’s the kind of filth that should come with a lifetime membership to some underground club.
Still, Kieran hadn’t stopped it. He keeps circling back to the sheer insanity of it, that dizzying mix of mortification and thrill that had overtaken his body like a separate entity, forcing him to do things he’d never have imagined before.
He fucking sat on Ash’s dumb, attractive face, for crying out loud. How insane is that?
And after? After, Ash had been infuriatingly normal.
He’d kissed Kieran long and deep, so he wouldn’t have a chance to overthink, wiped him down, and made him drink coconut lychee water.
Then he started talking about where to get lunch before work, like they hadn’t just redefined depravity together.
Kieran kept waiting for the awkwardness to land, for the embarrassment to catch up, but it never came. He had wanted to be weird about it, but Ash hadn’t given him the chance.
Now, though, the tables have turned. Ash has been off all day—and last night, when Kieran had joined him in bed after taking a shower.
At first he worried Ash was upset with him, but quickly shot that idea down.
If he had a problem with Kieran, he’d likely take it out on his ass, not give him the silent treatment.
Plus, he’d still kissed him goodnight and stroked his hair until Kieran fell asleep.
And then there’s the fact that he’s been glaring at his phone intermittently, as if waiting for a delayed delivery.
What’s most unsettling about the whole thing is the silence. Ash is never quiet; he fills every space, every pause, with something. Granted, it’s generally something dumb and irritating, but it’s become such a natural part of everyday life that the absence of it feels cold and foreign.
Today, there’s something tense and guarded around him.
Kieran knows what it looks like when someone’s in their head, gnawing on some invisible thing, and the realization makes his chest tight.
For once, it isn’t him squirming under the weight of unspoken things, Ash is.
And that’s worse, because Kieran’s almost never on this side of things.
The only time he’d been there was with Dawson, and back then he hadn’t found a way to help him.
He has no idea how to help now, either, and that eats at him.
Ash slips back into his usual funny, composed persona once they join everyone at the restaurant.
Kieran has a niggling feeling it’s all just an act.
Still, Ash jokes with everyone, makes jabs at Gabe whenever he can, and sucks up to Carrie like he wants her to disown her son and adopt him instead.
It’s good to see him smile again, even if it might be a little feigned.
That being said, Kieran will interrogate him once the dinner is over.
And he has to admit, the whole experience isn’t bad, not in the way he’d dreaded. Yes, Gabe and Zeke deserve duct tape over their mouths, and Carrie? Carrie would require a whole isolation cell, but it’s actually quite nice. It feels good to be included, to be wanted somewhere, not just tolerated.
Everyone but Zeke lets out a collective sigh of relief when Carrie excuses herself to the restroom.
Kieran turns to Gabe, who is perusing his fork like he’s contemplating jamming it into his jugular just to escape.
“So, your mum is…a character.”
Gabe’s forehead drops to the table. “You can say that again.”
“Very hot too,” Zeke chimes in.
Gabe lifts his head to show his disgusted expression.
“She’s a very beautiful lady,” Ellis offers diplomatically. It doesn’t have quite the desired effect, as Gabe fixes him with a betrayed look. “I mean, you look a lot like her.”
“It’s a cross I need to bear.”
“Are you an only child?” Kieran asks. “She seems like she likes to adopt random people.” Ash and Zeke clearly love her, although Ellis seems to be her current favorite.
“She does that,” Ash confirms his observation. There’s something faraway in his gaze, a sort of nostalgia. Did Kieran accidently hit a sore spot?
“She does,” Ellis agrees. “Works wonders for mummy issues. Or daddy issues.”
“I can attest to that,” Ash says. It’s the most he’s ever revealed about his own family’s dynamic.
Not that Kieran ever asked, but he’s surprised that Ash—the same person who likes to run his mouth and dig deep into personal issues—has never shared anything about it.
Does the other Kieran know? He must, right?
Like, it’s been two years, surely Ash must’ve confided in him.
It’s way too soon and no one is ready when Carrie returns to the table.
“What did I miss?” She smiles knowingly. “Were you talking about me?”
Dawson and Ellis quickly start to deny it, but Gabe, Ash and Zeke reply with a loud “Yes.”
Carrie snorts, looking pleased. What a weird woman.
Kieran’s starting to dig it. He’s always been told he has zero filter, but those people clearly never met Gabe’s mum.
The conversation continues in a similar spirit, with most of Kieran’s attention on Ash, trying to figure him out.
Unsuccessfully. The guy is a mystery. Not even Gabe with his mojo picks up on anything weird coming off of his cousin.
Then again, he might be too busy trying to keep his unhinged mother at bay.
Once they’re finished with the main course and waiting for dessert to arrive, Gabe suddenly clears his throat.
“So…since everyone is here, we figured this is a good opportunity to tell you.”
Carrie perks up. “Tell us what?”
“Hallelujah,” Ash mumbles, too quiet for anyone but Kieran to hear.
Gabe shares a look with Ellis, who takes his hand.
“Ellis and I are engaged!” he announces with a smile so bright it’s almost blinding. Ellis’ elation is more subtle. “Why is no one saying anything?”
Good question. How come Carrie is not shitting herself with excitement? Instead, she looks confused.
“I thought you’re already engaged.”
Gabe, equally confused, opens his mouth, but doesn’t get to speak.
“Yeah. Haven’t we had this conversation before?” Zeke asks.
“Impossible. We only—"
“Yeah. I’m sure we’ve been over this before,” Dawson joins them.
“We haven’t—”
Cal, who’s barely said a word since they arrived, speaks. “Agreed. I’m getting a strong déja-vu.”
“Guys—”
“Are you sure you haven’t told us before and just forgot?” Carrie presses.
“Don’t you think I’d remember something like this?! Ellis, tell them!”
All eyes fix on Ellis, who looks like a high-schooler about to deliver a presentation he hasn’t prepared for. “I mean…it is possible…”
“Ellis!”
He turns puppy-dog eyes on Gabe. “I’ve been so busy lately, it’s kinda blurring together.”
As the heated discussion carries on, Kieran leans into Ash. “Have they told us or not?”
The corners of Ash’s mouth lift. “Not.”
“Shouldn’t we say something?”
“Nah.”
Kieran huffs. “You’re evil.”
“Yeah.” When he turns his head, their lips almost brush. “But you like it.”
Kieran stares at his mouth, his own going a little dry. Everyone is too busy bickering; they wouldn’t notice if he snagged a kiss, right?
“That leaves you two,” Carrie's excited voice makes him draw back.
“Huh?”
“When will we be hearing wedding bells?”
Wedding…what?
“Muuum.” Gabe looks exhausted, like someone who’s been through, well, a cyclone. And possibly an earthquake.
“Soon,” Ash replies breezily, while Kieran is trying to string together a coherent thought.
Carrie clasps her hands together. “Lovely!” Satisfied with the answer, she moves on to the next topic, as if nothing happened.
A few seconds later, the waiter brings over their dessert.