35. Mina
Chapter thirty-five
B en looks handsome in his lightweight blue jacket, white t-shirt, and blue jeans as he leads me onto the porch and shuts the front door. We move over the railing and lean against it sideways, so we’re facing each other.
“You said you have something to give me?” I ask, filling in the silence as he stares at me silently.
“Oh, right. It’s just that first…” He licks his lips, pulling my hand up to hold between his. “I need to apologize.”
I take a deep breath and listen. There has been a lot of this lately. And every time one of them apologizes for what they’d done, I’m given a little insight into the circumstances around it. And each time, it made me see that they didn’t have bad intentions. And as much as finding out had originally hurt me, I’m starting to appreciate that they still seemed to see me , even with the case hanging over them.
I still don’t think it makes what they did okay, but I understand why they did it now. I was more upset with the twins, Dom and Atlas, for pursuing something intimate with me before telling me the truth. That hurt. It was why it was easier to forgive Tucker than it was the twins. But I appreciated that without me even having to say anything, Jasper and Max just knew they had more to make up for.
The way they refused to give into their own pleasure last night, making the whole evening about my enjoyment, had meant a lot and gone a long way towards me forgiving them.
Looking up at Ben right now, I know that whatever he has to say will be honest and heartfelt, and that, in my own way, I’ve already forgiven him, without even needing to hear his reasoning.
“Mina, I’m so sorry for how everything played out. Even though we couldn’t break our cover at the beginning, I should have voiced my opinion more with the others to tell you the truth straight away. I pride myself in being smart, and I should have seen how our actions would be perceived by you. We should have told you in the hospital room, as soon as you woke up, who we were.”
“Thanks, Ben. That means a lot.”
“You’re forgiving me too easily, Princess,” he says, a smile playing at his lips as he sighs.
“Oh? Who says I’ve forgiven you? I’m pretty sure I was promised a gift of some sort and a full day with you?” I ask him, feeling confident as I raise an eyebrow up at him in question, making him chuckle.
He reaches into his back pocket. “You were indeed. And Princess, I’ll spend every day for the rest of our lives apologizing to you if that’s what it takes.”
Caught in the gaze of his beautiful brown eyes, I’m only able to swallow the lump in my throat and nod. He breaks the connection as he looks down at the small box he holds out to me. I reach out and lift the lid revealing a sleek rose gold watch.
“Oh! It’s so pretty, Ben. Thank you.”
“This is no ordinary watch. It’s a phone, so if you ever lose your own phone, you can still call us on this,” he says, showing me the call button where all their names are listed. “And it has a gps tracker in it, so we can always find you.” My heart leaps to my throat at that thought as my wide eyes meet his.
“So if… If someone takes me, if I’m wearing this, you’ll be able to find me?”
“Anywhere in the world,” he replies softly.
I try not to cry from such a thoughtful gift. Having that extra level of safety means everything to me. And if the way Ben pulls me into his chest, hugging me firmly, tells me anything, it’s that he knows it.
He kisses the top of my head. “We just want you to feel safe, Princess.”
“Thank you, this is… This is amazing.”
He helps me put it on as the front door opens and Atlas steps out. I instantly feel the tension as we look at each other. We haven’t really had time to speak since the whole incident happened, and I’ve been feeling uneasy about him and Dom asking me to be their girlfriend before telling me the truth about who they were.
Sooner or later, we were going to have words. But despite his scary appearance, Atlas was like a teddy bear on the inside, and I didn’t want to hurt him, even though he’d hurt me. I’m afraid if I tell him how I’m really feeling, it would make things worse. I’m not sure where we stand now, if he’s even still my boyfriend or not, and that thought alone makes me anxious enough that I know I need answers. Whatever the answer is, I need to know… today.
“Alright, let’s get going,” Ben says, taking my hand and directing me to the SUV. He opens the passenger door for me, but I turn to Atlas as I speak. “You can sit in the front. I’m sure it’s crammed in the back for your long legs. ”
“It’s fine,” he says, not looking at me as he opens the back and jumps in, closing it behind him. I look up at Ben, who shrugs, then gestures for me to climb into the passenger seat.
“Oh my goodness, look at the babies!” I tell Ben and Atlas as we look into the penguin exhibit. We watch them waddle around all adorably, making me coo at the cuteness.
“I didn’t know you liked penguins so much,” Ben says with a smile, watching me more than the animals, which is something I’ve noticed them both doing all day.
“Neither did I, but they’re so cute. Even the adults are cute, the way they waddle around like that.”
“Are they your favorite animal you’ve seen?” Atlas asks, surprising me. He’s been pretty quiet today, even when I’ve tried to get him to join in our conversation. But I still enjoyed his company. He’s normally quieter than the others anyway, so it’s not totally out of character for him.
“Yep, definitely,” I reply, answering his question.
“Well, Princess,” Ben says, turning away from the exhibit and offering his hand to me, which I take. “That was the last exhibit, anything you want to see again?”
“No, I’m exhausted, my feet are killing me, actually.”
Atlas grunts before dropping to a knee in front of me, giving me his back.
“Uhh….” I mumble in confusion, wondering wh at he’s doing.
Ben laughs as he explains, “he’s trying to give you a piggy-back ride, Princess. Jump on.”
“Oh! Um, okay, thanks,” I say as I climb onto his back. It was on the top of my tongue to refuse. But honestly, he’s massive, and I knew he could easily carry me, and if I was being honest, it was a huge relief to get off my feet. They’d been hurting for the past two hours, but I didn’t want to say anything before we’d seen all the animals, afraid they’d make us leave.
Atlas stands, boosting me up as he goes, and I wrap my arms around his neck, resting my chin on his shoulder. I can feel all the muscles in his back as he moves, making me realize this has another benefit I hadn’t considered.
I wiggle against him, partially trying to get comfortable and partly trying to get closer to him.
“Thanks for the ride, big guy,” I whisper in his ear. He grunts in response, making me smile. “You’re like a gorilla,” I reply, making Ben laugh. He wiggles his fingers where he holds my thighs, making me squeal at my ticklishness, and a smile pulls at the corner of his mouth.
“Be careful, big guy, I could choke you out from this position, you know?”
“Oh really?” he asks, skepticism in his voice as he turns his head just enough to make eye contact with me. “And who taught you how to do that?”
“You did.”
“I did, did I?” he asks with an eyebrow raised.
“Yep, don’t you remember? Oh no, are you losing your memory already, Atlas? It’s a shame you’re getting so old—Ahh!” I squeal with laughter as he tickles me again and I try to squeeze his neck, but it doesn’t seem to restrict his breathing at all, causing me to surrender. “Okay, okay, I give, you win!”
His fingers instantly stop moving, and I release my poor imitation of a choke hold on his neck. My eyes catch Ben’s and he gives me a wink before looking back as we near the zoo exit. But instead of heading to the gate, Atlas walks to the large gift shop and kneels down to let me off his back by a bench.
“You two sit here and don’t move until I get back,” he commands, quickly entering the store.
“He’s bossy,” I whisper to Ben, watching where Atlas went.
He laughs, grabbing my hand and distracting me from Atlas’s abrupt departure. “Did you have fun today?”
“The zoo is awesome! I had no idea how fun it could be looking at the animals. Thank you for bringing me here.”
“Of course. I actually have something for you,” he says, pulling out a tiny little velvet pouch and handing it to me.
I open it up and pull out a new charm for my bracelet, a gorilla. I look at him and we both burst out laughing. “I can exchange it for a penguin, now I know that’s your favorite. I chose the gorilla because I thought it looked nice and I thought you’d appreciate the symbolism. The gorilla represents family and protection.”
“It’s perfect, I love it,” I tell him as he attaches it to my bracelet for me. Along with the horse and popcorn, my bracelet was starting to look more filled out. And I loved that at any time I could just look down and see those charms and be brought back to those fond memories anytime I wanted.
“Will you stay with me tonight?” I ask Ben as he finishes attaching the charm .
He looks up at me in surprise, swallows nervously, then nods, all without muttering a word. Is he nervous? At least that makes two of us. We’ve never even cuddled before. But I have a feeling he’ll be great at it.
Ben’s eyes move behind me and I turn as Atlas comes out of the store and holds up a large white bag to me. My surprised eyes meet his intense gaze and I take it silently, and when I open it up and peek inside, I squeal at what I find.
“Oh my goodness, it’s so cute!” I pull out the giant stuffed baby penguin, clutching it tightly to my chest. Atlas’s eyes soften before he turns and kneels down for me, silently telling me to climb on.
“Here, I can take that for you,” Ben says, reaching for the penguin, but I pull it away as I scold him.
“No, AJ is mine!”
“AJ?” he asks in surprise.
“Yep,” I don’t explain the name, but I think Atlas knows, from the cocky smirk on his face. Tucker had given me a stuffed cow that I named TJ, Tucker Junior, so it was an easy guess as to what AJ stood for. Atlas Junior .