Chapter 14
Fourteen
Two fucking weeks. That’s how long it had been since Jessie spent the night at his place.
Hawk wasn’t trying to push, but the more time went on, the more restless he became.
He couldn’t fucking sleep, his mind racing through every possible reason why she just wouldn’t talk to her family and move in with him.
The simulator plans sat open on his computer, but he hadn’t fucking looked at them in the last hour. A notification pinged on his phone.
Are you awake?
It was two o’clock in the fucking morning and those three words, words that had previously made his heart race with the promise of a good time in his future, had his blood running cold.
Because Jessie wouldn’t be messaging him in the middle of the night if everything was okay.
Something had to be wrong. Something with her… or the baby.
Christ. His fingers trembled as he forced himself to calm the fuck down and type out a reply. She hadn’t called. If it was something really bad, she would have called.
Right? Fuck. He typed out his response as fast as he could.
Yeah. Everything okay? Nausea level?
Three little dots popped up, and disappeared. Only to pop up again a second later. His eyes burned as he stared at the bright screen, but he didn’t even dare blink.
Nausea is barely there. Maybe a two. I just woke up and ate a cracker with some peanut butter. The band is still working.
So everything’s good?
So good.
I think I felt the baby move.
Holy. Shit.
That’s incredible! What did it feel like?
Like a little bubble…
or a bee buzzing under my muscle for a second.
Their little bumblebee had moved.
And he’d fucking missed it.
I’m coming over.
No, you can’t.
Fuck that. He wasn’t going to miss this moment with her. Hawk hit the camera button and waited for her to pick up. But she didn’t. The call ended with an automatic note that Jessie was unavailable to talk.
Answer my video call.
He hit the button again and waited…
*Declined*
Jessie!
It’s the middle of the night and I need to sleep. I’m organizing Lach’s paperwork again and it’s taking all my brain power.
You can sleep if I come over. I’ll just keep my hand on your belly. I have warm hands. You’ll sleep like the little bee growing in your belly.
So, not at all seeing as how he’s clearly one of those babies who wants to be up at all hours of the night bugging his mama?
I’ll sneak in. It was my specialty when I was sixteen. I’ve still got the moves. No one will know I’m there.
No. You know your left ankle clicks every fifth step. My mom would hear that in a heartbeat and probably try to wack you over the head with one of her cast iron pans.
Hawk chuckled at the image of Dolly shocked as shit to see him in her house bounced through his mind. Better her cast iron pans than Daniel’s shotgun.
I think I just felt him again! I’m going to die if it’s not the baby and I’m texting you about gas.
I want you to tell me about everything. Even if it is gas, I want to know.
Hawk groaned, an ache spreading in his chest. He didn’t want to be missing those fucking precious moments with his family. And that’s what they were. Whether Jessie ever wanted to admit it or not. She would always be his family.
I can’t believe I’m missing this. Please move in with me. I’ll get on my knees and beg if I need to.
We’ve already been over this.
I’m missing out on everything. I don’t just want stolen moments with you two. I want every moment.
I’m trying. I promise. It would be so easy to say yes, Chief. But I just need to know that we’re taking that step for the right reasons.
He got it. Really, truly he did. It still fucking sucked.
*Sends picture of belly, pointing to the side, near her hip.*
This is where I felt him. Do you think it’s real? Maybe it’s just a muscle spasm or something weird.
I trust your intuition. If you think it’s the baby, I think it is too. Besides, we know Bee is already so strong.
He really is. But it’s still early. Dawn told me she felt her babies move around now, but that a lot of first-time moms can’t yet. It’s probably wishful thinking.
This is killing me. Take a video of your belly so I can see. Please?
There’s nothing to see except the little bump.
That’s exactly what I want to see. Point again to the spot where you felt it so I can watch it whenever I want.
He held his breath waiting for the next message to come through.
And finally, it did. A video, dark background, with her belly illuminated from her phone’s flash.
It was starting to get a little curve to it, and that made Hawk’s heart squish in his chest. His baby was right there.
And he was fucking missing out on everything.
Move in with me. Full time. No more of this sneaking back and forth. Please, Jess. It’s more than the fact that you're pregnant with our baby. These moments are the foundation for our family. And I can’t imagine missing out on more of them.
Can we talk about it in the morning?
Yes! I’ll bring doughnuts with me to the shop!
Trying to bribe me?
I’d find a way to capture a shooting star and pull it down to Earth if I thought that would be the way to show you how much I want things between us to work out.
I don’t need a shooting star. But I won’t say no to a chocolate glazed doughnut with chocolate sprinkles.
Oh. The baby wants a glazed sour cream one, too.
Noted. See you and the bump bright and early.
Goodnight, Chief.
Goodnight, Pretty Girl.
Selecting this option will remove you from all classes marked ‘currently enrolled’. A ‘W’ for withdrawal will be on your academic transcript for each class. Are you sure you’d like to proceed with your selection?
God, no. She wasn’t sure. But Jessie knew she was spread too thin.
As much as the nausea band had been helpful over the last few weeks, the exhaustion of trying to juggle a million things was starting to override the magic of that little piece of technology.
She hadn’t even had the energy to spend time with Hawk lately, aside from accepting rides home after her shift.
Something had to give, and college classes were going to be the first to go.
“Hey, what time did you get in this morning? I thought I was going to be the only one here this early.” Dakota tapped on the door frame to the office.
Jessie hit ‘submit’ before she rubbed at the tightness in her temples.
The churning in her stomach had been growing all morning.
“You good? You look really pale and somehow green at the same time.”
She waved her hand in front of her face. “I’m fine. Probably just coming down with whatever Lach had last week. It’d honestly be just my luck.”
“You gotta take elderberry. You know my ma swears by it.”
Jessie smiled. “I remember. I’ll have to go say hi to her one of these days and see if I can sweet talk her into giving me a bottle of syrup.”
“No sweet talking necessary. I’ll bring one in for you tomorrow.” Dakota’s eyebrows pulled together. “Is it safe though…”
“Safe for?” she asked, her breath leaving her chest as his eyes dropped to her stomach. She was going to kill Lachlan…
“The baby.”
Jessie’s eyes went wide. “How do you…”
Dakota moved his hand out from behind his back, revealing a small bunch of flowers in a blue ceramic vase. “I overheard you and Lach the day you told him. I know I’ve been out of town for a while, but the guilt has been eating me alive. Hope the flowers can make up for my accidental eavesdropping.”
She cringed. “You’re fine. I should have made sure we were alone. Please don’t…” Her stomach dipped as head went fuzzy. “Please don’t mention it to anyone else, though. Okay?”
“Yeah. I heard that part, too. It’s all good. I won’t say a word.” Dakota set the flowers on the table beside her. “As long as you promise if you feel worse, you’ll take off, okay? No sense in filing paperwork when you’re feeling rough.”
“Yeah, I will. Thanks.”
Dakota turned to walk back to the garage, but Jessie stopped him. “Hey, do you know when Lachlan is supposed to get in this morning?”
“He’s over at the McFarland farm trying to see what’s going on with their truck. I doubt he’ll be in until this afternoon.”
“Got it. Thanks.”
Dakota lingered just outside the office door for a moment before taking two steps back inside.
“It’s probably not my place to say anything, Blue Jay. But is he stepping up?”
“He?”
“The baby’s dad. If you’re not in a good place with him, if you need some place to land, I thought maybe…” His hand went to the back of his neck and she watched heat flood his face. Oh… oh!
“That is incredibly sweet of you. But I’m fine. We’re figuring things out… the baby’s dad and me. But yeah, he’s in our lives and he’s stepping up. He’s actually been incredible. I’m the one holding things up between us.”
He nodded. “You’ve always been stubborn.”
“Don’t you think you should be out on the floor working?” Jessie sighed as she bit down on the cap of the pen she was holding.
Dakota shrugged his shoulders, giving her a smile that would have absolutely made her blush if she was still sixteen.
But now, it had no effect on her…. other than to make her realize how much she wished Hawk was there in that moment.
“Yeah, alright. I’m going. Just… remember, I’m here if you need me. ”
She nodded, afraid to try and speak past the lump in her throat. Instead, she moved the vase of flowers to the far side of the desk where there was a spot clear from the files she was trying to organize.
Her brother had been tight lipped since the bank incident. She’d only brought it up with him once, and he’d shut her down so fast it had felt like whiplash.
It was just a problem on the bank’s end, Jess. Leave it alone.
Lachlan’s voice played over and over in her mind. But the more she thought about it—and the more she looked through the records in front of her—the more she knew something else was going on.
“Well, look who it is, Leo. That pretty little thing from the diner works here too.” Jessie’s eyes moved from the laptop screen to the doorway.
“If you need one of the services we provide here, you’ll have to step away from that door and come see me over at this window.” Shit. She’d completely missed Dakota not shutting the door behind him when he went onto the floor to work. Unease settled in as the men smiled at her, but didn’t move.
“We could just come see you in there? Might be easier to show you what we need done if we can lay the parts out on the desk there.”
“You heard her. Step away from the fucking door.” The room spun and she fought the urge to put her head between her knees. Hawk walked in, all broad shoulders and scowl as he looked at the two men, now on the other side of the reception window.
“Thank you,” she whispered to him as she turned to the men. “What can I do for you today?”
“We need to see Dakota.”
Her brows furrowed, and she turned to the small TV that’s screen was split, showing the four camera feeds from the floor of the shop. But Dakota wasn’t in any of the frames.
“He must have just stepped out. I’m happy to take a message for you, or I can just let him know you stopped by.”
“Sure. You let him know Leo and Mack were here. He’s got an—” the man's eyes flashed to Hawk and then returned to Jessie, “invoice discrepancy we need to straighten out. Let him know we need to hear from him this week.”
“Sure thing. Mack and Leo. I’ll let him know.”
The two men turned, Mack knocking his fist against the counter top and Leo sending a wink her way, before leaving the shop.
“Who the fuck were they?” Hawk asked.
“Those are the guys Dakota was meeting with at the diner a few weeks ago. Lach said he wasn’t going to work with them, but I guess he changed his mind.”
Recognition flashed in Hawk’s eyes.
“That one is the creep who couldn’t take no for an answer, isn’t he?”
“Yeah.” Her body shook with the disgusting memory of his hand gripping her ass.
“I want you to call me if they show back up here again.”
Jessie wanted to say something sassy. Something that reminded Hawk she could take care of herself. But honestly, she didn’t feel like she could at that moment. So instead, she just nodded.
“Well, doughnuts are delivered.” Hawk’s smile widened as he dropped his gaze from her face down to her belly, where her hand was resting. “Have you felt our bumblebee moving again?”
The hope in his voice was precious.
“No. I’m sorry. I think it was just wishful thinking. Fourteen weeks is really early.”
Hawk shrugged. “Like you said, I definitely wouldn’t be able to feel it yet anyway. But it’s fun to imagine them moving around in there. I wish I could have seen your face when you felt it.”
Damn. Jessie swallowed down her guilt. She was being too stubborn, wasn’t she?
“Hey, Jess? Where do you want these?” He spun the doughnut box in his hand and her mouth filled with saliva. Only, it wasn’t because she was craving them. Nausea swelled, and she closed her eyes, taking a deep breath before she could answer.
“You can put them over by the window.”
“You okay? Sounded like you were looking forward to them. Now you don’t want to dig in?”
“I’m fine.”
Hawk’s growl sent a shiver down her spine. God, she really did go weak in the knees when he was overprotective. Lord, help her.
“Nausea level?”
She really hated to admit it, but the more time passed that morning, the worse she was feeling.
“A seven. Maybe an eight.”
He took two steps and closed the distance between them, pressing a kiss to her forehead as he circled his thumb over her bracelet.
“Fuck. Did this stop working?”
She shook her head, letting it fall against his chest. “I just… I don’t know what it is. I’ve just been feeling more and more nauseous as the day has gone on. And maybe a little dizzy. It’s hard to think. I swear I’ve restarted this spreadsheet four times because I can’t focus.”
His body went stiff under her. “I’m going to take you back to the apartment.”
“No. Don’t be silly. I’m only here for another hour anyway. Then I have a break before I’m supposed to be at the diner.”
“Jess.”
“Hawk.”
“Fine. Let’s at least get you out into the fresh air. Maybe it’s something in the shop that’s upsetting you.”
“Okay. Oh!” Hawk surprised her by scooping her up into his arms. Seriously, one minute she was sitting there, breathing him in because his cologne always settled her nerves, which was annoying enough, and then the next, she was hoisted up in his arms.
“What are you doing?” she managed to groan as the room spun.
“You just told me you’re dizzy. Not letting your two left feet trip you up. Gotta keep you and Bee safe.”
Bee. He’d given the baby their first official nickname. And Jessie loved it.
“My knight in shining armor.” Jessie let her head rest on his shoulder as he turned from the office. “Wait! Grab the doughnuts. I want to eat one if I start feeling better.”
Hawk chuckled. “Love the optimism, beautiful.”