21. Blair
TWENTY-ONE
blair
FIRST SUNDAY
“Mine,” Sean muttered, licking tears from my face while fucking me against the bathroom counter.
The skirt I picked to wear to church was hiked up around my waist, my legs wide and hooked in his arms as I gripped onto him for dear life.
“Yours,” I whimpered, thrusting to meet his long strokes.
My body pulsed from the inside out; he was so good at this, at making me feel so many things at once—whether his dick was in me or not.
“You needed this, didn’t you?”
I tossed my head back and his lips met my neck, the kisses that followed were gentle and full of concern.
“So bad,” I whispered, tears falling again. “Keep fucking me like that.”
We’d made a detour because I couldn’t stop crying. I couldn’t stop thinking about my mom in that expensive casket waiting to be brought into the church, and how no one had asked about her or even pretended to care.
That it even had to come to this made me so angry. I needed this release.
Sean pulled me forward and I gripped his shoulders, taking deep strokes that slid over my g-spot in a rhythmic way.
“I love this good ass pussy,” he groaned, a menacing smile on his face that made my walls clinch around him. “Mmhm. I felt that shit. Cum on your dick, baby.”
I came so hard I couldn’t breathe.
Two knocks on the door reminded me of where we were. But Sean’s eyes were drawing me in again and I couldn’t look away.
“We can go through with your plan or I can air it out and you take everything right now.”
He flexed his hips a little inside me and I shuddered, another orgasm coming to life and taking off without my permission.
“I…” I took a breath. “I can’t make informed decisions with your dick inside me, Oisin.”
Another knock at the bathroom door and he gently removed himself and set me on my feet.
I kept my skirt hiked while Sean cleaned me with the personal sized…
I squinted and smiled.
…unscented PH balancing wipes, he’d pulled from inside his coat hanging over the bathroom stall door.
“You planned this?”
“Orgasms calm you,” he said nonchalantly, cleaning himself after me, then adjusting and belting his black slacks. “Don’t let any of them see you sweat, Amoy. Or hurt, iight?”
I nodded, let my silk skirt fall and shook my head at the tiny rumples having it above my waist created; it stopped just above the knee and covered the fact I wore knee highs underneath.
Sean fixed my oversized knitted sweater and then pulled me in front of him, still waiting for my answer.
“I have to do this my way, okay?”
He nodded and kissed my forehead.
Thankfully I’d gone makeup-less aside from shading in my brows and clear lip gloss. After retouching my lips, I took Sean’s hand and closed my eyes.
“Lord, forgive us for this sin and all the others we’re about to commit.”
When I opened them again, everything I’d been feeling—before he dragged me to the only bathroom in the church everyone forgot was there—had disappeared.
“Take this…” Sean handed my coat and his to Lorcan after we emerged from the bathroom. “Let Tadhg know to have the casket brought in.”
He nodded and went up, switching places with Liam who wore a look of disgust on his face.
“Me and churches don’t get along,” he mumbled, looking around as if the spirit of the lord would jump out at him.
“Do you believe?” I asked, not surprised at how quickly he shook his head.
“I believe in God, not the church.”
Mmm.
“Or you believe in God and not his followers,” I mused, more to myself then him as Sean led us up the stairwell to the main entrance. “The church is what the people inside make it. Sometimes those people aren’t good…” I shrugged and watched Lorcan and Tadhg lead the pallbearers from the funeral home inside. “And sometimes, the good suffer because of it.”
The pallbearers stopped in front of us and I reached out to touch the white casket with gold trim.
“I hope you enjoy your home going service, ma.”
The sanctuary doors opened, which meant the last prayer after communion—but before my father started his sermon— had ended.
“Whoa! What is this?” the church mother at the door asked, white gloved hands still crossed beneath her breast as she let the door close behind her and stepped forward. “I can’t let you inside with—”
Good morning, church family!
My father’s voice and the congregations response boomed, reaching even my ears.
Good morning, pastor!
“You’ll move out of my way,” I stated calmly, once in front of her. “Or, I could move you.”
Her eyes bounced between me and everyone standing behind me, including the casket. This one hadn’t been around when I attended church more regularly, but she made a smart decision and shakily stepped aside.
“What’s your name?” I asked, tipping my head.
“L-Lora Weston.”
She had to be about my mother’s age.
“How long you been with the church?”
“Four years.”
Less time than I’d been away from this place.
“Have you ever slept with my father? The pastor.”
Her big deep set eyes widened further.
“No! Never!”
I nodded.
“Go home and have a good Sunday, Lora. But do come back…” I flicked my gaze to Liam. “Lock the door behind her and put a man at every exit in the sanctuary when you’re finished.”
Nobody was leaving until after we sent my mother off properly.
I opened the doors to the sanctuary and stepped inside, heading straight for the front.
Church members showing up after the sermon had started wasn’t anything new but never do they walk down the middle aisle.
It didn’t take long for the murmurs to start, especially after my father stopped mid-sentence at the sight of me. He glanced back at Blake and then immediately tried to take control.
“Don’t be alarmed,” he said to the congregation as he stepped around the podium with his gaze on me. “My daughter has finally returned home. Come…”
He held his hand out as if to coax me to him and I couldn’t help but laugh.
The audacity of this man but I went to him, even let him take my hand to help me up the three steps leading to the pulpit.
But when we were close enough, he flicked the off button on the mic and leaned in.
“What the fuck are you doing?”
I smiled.
“Sending my mother off, of course,” I said, raising my hand to signal for them to enter with the casket.
He looked past me and the shock then pure anger in his eyes made me so happy.
“You made your move and now I’m making mine,” I whispered. “Now, either sit the fuck down or I’ll embarrass you much worse than this.”
There were no options left for him, other than following my directive or calling the police. And we both knew he didn’t want to do that.
I couldn’t control the congregation but he could. Him sitting meant they wouldn’t panic.
“You’ll answer for this.”
He handed me the mic and I flicked it on before responding.
“Not before you do.”
I spun around in my five inch heels and smiled as I stepped to the large acrylic podium, much different than the wooden one that’d been here four years ago.
“Good morning,” I greeted, eyes briefly meeting Sean’s for a little strength as he took a seat in the first row. “I know you all are wondering what’s happening. But it’s been a while and I think it’s only right I re-introduce myself before we get started…” I stared at the casket before continuing. “For those of you who don’t know, my name is Blair and I am indeed Nathaniel Phillips daughter. You’ve probably seen a younger version of myself in pictures littered throughout this building with my brothers and mother—who happen to be in the casket you’re all wondering about.”
The uproar was much more satisfying than I expected. But only a few stood to leave, mostly parents with their children. Everyone else was too nosy to retreat.
“I figured,” I went on, waving for Liam to let the families leave. “Since no one cared she was missing, it was best to bring her to you. That being said, today we are going to have a home going service for first lady Kendra Phillips, the wife of Pastor Nathaniel Phillips. Who wants to do the first musical selection? My mother loved music.”
I turned and looked at my dad.
“You’ve always had a soulful voice.”
Everyone was watching.
And now they all knew his wife was dead and he hadn’t made an announcement, that he’d been about to go on with Sunday service as usual without acknowledging her at all.
Well, fuck him and everybody in this room for knowing he was scum and still listening to his interpretation of the bible anyway.
“Come sing something for your late wife.”
I held the microphone out for him and waited.
Eventually, he stood, buttoned his custom fitted Brioni suit jacket and stepped forward.
“This is only the beginning,” I whispered, brushing past him to take a seat beside Blake.
“My daughter hasn’t been around for a while,” my father said into the microphone, the start of his lie rolling off the tongue with ease. “We, admittedly weren’t on speaking terms. I had no way of informing her…” he walked down the steps and stood at the side of my mother’s casket, resting his hand upon it as if he fucking cared. “Kendra didn’t want a sendoff and I had intended to honor that. But now that we are here together and in front of all you, please indulge my daughter.”
Blake leaned over as my father bellowed the lyrics to what should’ve been my mother’s favorite gospel song. Instead, he’d chosen his.
“I see your plan clear as day,” he murmured. “There’s a board meeting in a week, you should come.”
Our eyes met and he hiked his brows, the challenge clear.
“Mmm,” I hummed, looking away. “Where’s your brother?”
Caden’s absence in all this worried me and only getting rid of him would combat the feeling.
“You finally caught up, huh?”
I bit back a scoff.
“Why would I know anything about this family? Have I ever been a part of it?”
My problem with Blake was he’d never treated me as his sister. Never took up or looked out for me. His answer to everything had always been silence and now he was talking a little too much.
“You were more protected than you think,” he said, standing afterward as if to leave me confused.
But I called bullshit.
And fuck him for making it out to be exactly what the fuck it wasn’t.
“I have to be honest,” Blake said, when he took the microphone and my father sat beside me. “Kendra wasn’t my biological mother but she treated me as her own and for that I’ll forever be grateful.”
His confession was unexpected and the low growl my father released meant he hadn’t prepared for my brother to betray him, too.
“Do you think I can’t kill you and be back here next Sunday as if none of this happened?” he asked, gaze forward and expression dead.
I rolled my eyes.
“Your threats don’t hold as much weight as they used to,” I said, crossing my feet at the ankle. “I’d love to see you try though. Killing me and actually living to see that next Sunday is an unachievable goal, Nathaniel. Have you met my husband?”
My eyes were locked with the man in question.
He was on go, ready for anything and I loved him so much for it.
Loved him for gifting me this confidence, this security and faith in him to protect me at all costs, too.
“You are never more important than business, Blair,” he replied nonchalantly, his old way of thinking just as disgusting as before. “Your life will never be that important to him.”
His words stung more than they should, because he actually believed them to be true. My father didn’t think I could be loved that deeply, but he was wrong and I wanted so badly to prove it—to prove that Sean was everything he wasn’t.
“Why don’t we ask him,” I murmured, sliding away from him and leaving just enough room for Sean to fit. “If you’re so sure of my worth, gamble with it to his face.”
The simple adjustment summoned my husband to the spot I left open for him.
“Now that you two are married we should talk expansion in our business dealings,” my father said the second Sean’s ass hit the pew. “I have time after—”
“Your hands are cold.”
My fingers had only grazed his but now keeping me warm was top priority, not my dad’s attempt to humble me.
“There’s always a draft in the pulpit,” I whispered as he draped an arm over my shoulder and pulled me into him.
“Now that we’re married,” Sean started, curling his fingers around mine. “All business goes through Blair. Set a meeting with her and she’ll let me know if it’s worth the investment. Any agreements you had with my father are null.”
It was something about a man doing exactly what you expected of him and doing it well.
And had Blake not turned the mic in my direction, I might’ve gloated a little harder.
“Do you see what I mean,” I murmured to my father as I stood to give last remarks. “Unachievable. Is trying really worth losing everything and your life?”
Every move I’d made up until this point was to be of service to Sean and a detriment to my father. And damn did it feel good to execute.