Chapter 26
Quincy
The campus was picture-perfect. It was a slice of green space—and gold, orange, and red if you wanted to get technical—and majestic, old buildings in the middle of the city, like an escape from the chaos.
I knew college would be its own kind of stress and chaos, but it was hard not to fall in love with the setting.
Knox drove us toward Clayborne’s, the restaurant where we were meeting Ryan, my older brother.
It was situated on Hale Street, the cornerstone of the redeveloped neighborhood close to both downtown and the college, and owned by Sierra North’s brother-in-law, Hunter Clayborne.
I hadn’t been there before but had heard buzz about it, particularly since Hayden’s home decor store was down the street.
I hoped to explore before we headed off to the baby superstore.
First, though…Ryan.
I adored my older brother. Even though we didn’t see each other all that often, we were close.
He worked too much, thanks to the success of Tech Horse Software.
He and his partners, Jackson Lowell and Keaton Hayes, were launching a new product I couldn’t pretend to understand, and Ryan had been traveling more than he’d been home for the past couple of months.
I was excited to see him and dreading it at the same time. Knox and I were short-term and secret. We were alone so often that it was an adjustment to be with others and to act like just boss and employee sometimes. I was worried we might accidentally reveal too much. I’d have to be on guard.
Knox parked in a garage by the gorgeous and stately Wentworth Hotel at the opposite end of the short street, which gave us the chance to check out all the shops as we walked by.
“That’s where Everly records,” Knox said, pointing to the Hale Street Recording Studio, an unassuming building on the opposite side.
“I’ve heard a lot of big names are in and out of there.”
“From Hayden, right?” Knox said with a laugh. “She would know since her shop is right next door. Do you mind if we stop in there after lunch?”
“Do you mind if we stop in half these stores?” I asked, noting a boot store and a boutique and a bakery. “I’ve heard about that place.” I pointed at Sugar Babies Sweet Shop at the same time the aroma of baked goods mixed with a delicious fried-food diner scent—Frank’s Diner—reached my nose.
“I’m up for it. The baby store won’t take long. I’d like to be home by dinnertime so I can get a few hours of work done this evening.”
“Deal. Ohh, maybe we can find some books for this girl at Angry Cat Books,” I said, squeezing one of Juniper’s soft-bootied feet.
“Because my poor, deprived child only has about three dozen board books. I could never say no to a bookstore.”
We reached the door of Clayborne’s on the Corner and went inside.
From the street, the bar and grill looked unassuming, clearly a building with historical roots.
On the inside, it was lively, full of chatter and energy thanks to a near-capacity lunch crowd.
A long bar ran the length of the place on the left side, with a small stage at the front end by the windows.
In the back half was a loft area with more tables.
I scanned for my brother, but we were twenty minutes early. Ryan tended to be the right-on-time type. We grabbed one of the last open tables by a window on the Hale Street side and settled Juniper into a high chair.
Once we’d ordered drinks, Knox asked, “So what’d you think of the college? I didn’t expect the campus to be so scenic in the middle of the city.” He took out Juniper’s favorite cereal, swiped over the table with a wipe, then set several pieces on a napkin in front of her.
“It’s beautiful. I was there a few times growing up, but I never did an official visit before I applied. I went based on the reputation of the education program and because it’s close to home.”
“That dorm is downright posh. It’s a few steps up from my guest room.” He grinned and then set Juniper’s sippy cup in front of her.
She picked up her cup with the happiest laugh and then hit it on the table. She startled at the sound of it hitting, her eyes going wide and adorable. I leaned in with a smile, kissed her forehead, and said, “It’s okay, sweet pea. That’s what happens when you bang things on the table.”
The baby studied my face, then broke out into a grin and babbled back to me.
“The dorm is nice but has nothing on your place,” I told Knox. I raised my brows suggestively. “And it’s been a while since I’ve slept in your guest room.”
“If I get my way, you won’t,” he said in a private voice.
“That twin bed in the dorm will be lonely.”
“You’ll be so busy with school and a social life that you won’t even notice. And if you do, the backward-ball-cap guy would love to keep you company.” He said it like a joke, but I wasn’t sure how to take it.
“Is that what you want?” I asked without thinking. “For me to hook up with some nineteen year-old guy?”
He leaned his elbows on the table and brushed my hand briefly. “Quince, it doesn’t matter what I want. This is your future, and not to sound like some old dude, but it’s a bright one.”
I made myself smile at his humor attempt, but I wasn’t feeling it. I was feeling uneasy. Everything would be changing. It was a lot to wrap my head around now that I’d been on campus, enrolled in my classes.
“Hey, Quincy.” My brother broke me out of my thoughts as he approached and extended his arms for a hug.
I hopped down and threw my arms around him. He had more of a beard than before, but it looked good on him. His blue eyes sparkled with energy even though I saw fatigue underneath. No surprise with his workload.
“Ryan, this is Knox Breckenridge and his daughter, Juniper. Ryan Yates,” I said.
They shook hands and greeted each other, and my brother fawned over the baby.
“You’re going to be a heartbreaker,” he said in an indulgent voice as she stared up at him. “I can tell already.”
“Don’t go there,” Knox said with a laugh. “I’m still getting my head around bottles and diapers.”
“I heard you’ve had quite a whirlwind,” Ryan said as he sat next to me.
Our server showed up and took our orders, then hurried off.
“How’s my favorite older brother?” I asked.
“Still your only older brother, smarty. I’m doing well. Work is keeping me out of trouble.”
“Quincy said you’re one of the founders of Tech Horse,” Knox said. “You guys are having quite a year from what I’ve read.”
“We are. It’s been a crazy ride, mostly in a good way. We’re planning to go public in March.”
“I read a rumor about that in one of the financial blogs I follow,” Knox said.
And just like that, they were off, talking about a subject I didn’t understand in depth, but I was fine with that.
Business wasn’t my thing, especially not the financial aspects of it.
Hello, eye glaze, but I loved that my brother and Knox connected—and then I had to remind myself it didn’t matter.
I wasn’t bringing a boyfriend home to meet the family after all.
“So how’s the fam, Quincy? Any Cynthia drama of late?” Ryan asked once their business talk had been interrupted by our food arriving.
“Isn’t there always Cynthia drama?” I asked after I finished chewing the first bite of my burger.
“When it comes to the two of you, always,” my brother confirmed.
Looking between Ryan and me, Knox asked, “Is this mainly a Quincy-Cynthia thing?”
I nodded, and my brother said, “They’re like water and oil. Always have been. To be fair, I was out of the house by the time my dad remarried. I’ve never had to live with Cynthia. But I think there’s also some kind of unspoken female dynamic going on.”
“There is,” I acknowledged. “Knox suggested I try to make peace with her.”
I looked up in time to catch Ryan’s appraising look at Knox.
“And?” Ryan popped a fried mushroom into his mouth.
“I’m thinking about it. I want peace,” I said. “I’m just not sure how to go about it, what to say. I don’t know if it’s even possible.”
“I can tell you for sure it’s not possible if you don’t make the first move,” Ryan said.
I narrowed my eyes and looked between him and Knox. “Are you sure you two have never met before and discussed this?” I accused, joking.
“It might just be easier to see with some distance,” Knox said.
“So let’s say I take her to lunch.” I dipped a pretzel bite into the cheese sauce and let it drip. “What do I say to her?”
By the time we’d finished eating and hashed out my Cynthia problem, I’d decided to give it a try and ask her to brunch. I knew the guys were right when they said my stepmom would never make the first move. She seemed to have issues with being the bigger person even though she was the mom.
Once the server had cleared our plates, Knox excused himself to change Juniper’s diaper, picked her and the diaper bag up, and headed to the restroom, leaving me alone with my brother.
“I like him,” Ryan said as soon as Knox was out of earshot.
That shot a spike of relief and happiness through me, but I quickly tamped it down, reminding myself my brother didn’t have to like my employer. Particularly my very short-term employer.
Instead I said, “He’s easy to work for. I was lucky to be working when he first brought Juniper into Henry’s.
” I laughed. “You should’ve seen him and Cash and Ava.
None of them had any experience with babies.
” Though my brother had never lived in the same house with Cynthia and our half-siblings, he’d been around plenty and had helped with diapers and feedings and baths many times.
“He was lucky you were there.” He pushed his empty plate back. “You two seem close.”
I went on alert. “I guess we’ve become friends,” I allowed. It wasn’t a lie, just wasn’t the whole truth. “I’ve known him for less than a month though.”
“You live in his house.”
“That’s what a live-in nanny does,” I said with a laugh.
I racked my brain for whether Knox or I had slipped up and said something to get my brother on this topic of our “closeness.”
“Has Dad met him?”
“Not that I know of. He could’ve gone in for insurance from Dad or something.”
My brother nodded once, looking thoughtful.
“What?” I said grumpily, my heart pounding harder. “Whatever you’re thinking, just say it.”
“I would say”—he began as he swished the ice around in his water glass—“unless you want Dad and Cynthia figuring out what’s going on between you, you should avoid being with all of them in the same room.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
We hadn’t slipped up. Hadn’t accidentally said anything about…us.
“When I got here, I saw him touch your hand. It wasn’t a boss-employee touch.”
“We didn’t—”
“I’m not here to judge you, Quincy. You know me better than that. But I’d have to be in a coma not to sense the feelings between you two.”
“There aren’t feelings,” I said automatically.
He chuckled quietly. “Oh, there are. Maybe you’re denying them to yourself, but they’re plain to see. On both sides.”
I stopped my denial before I could start it, curious. “Like what?” I challenged.
“The way Knox looks at you, for one. When you’re talking, he studies you, hangs on your words.”
“No, he doesn’t.”
“And the way he knows you. You said you haven’t even known him a month, but he seems as if he’s known you for years. He gets you, lil sis.”
His words caused a warm rush and a surge of panic at the same time.
Knox didn’t have feelings for me.
I mean, of course he had the kind of feelings that made him want to sleep with me. And he trusted me with his baby. We got along well, but that didn’t mean love or those kinds of feelings. To him, I was a secret lover he didn’t want anyone to know about.
Before I could argue any of this out loud, my brother continued. “Are you going to tell me you don’t have feelings for him?”
I should. But this was my brother, and I trusted him. And though I didn’t know what my feelings were exactly, I couldn’t deny there was something.
I expelled a breath. “I have feelings. But that’s irrelevant. I’m going to school in two months.”
“An hour away. You could make it work if you wanted to.”
“That’s not what I want,” I said. I’d been over this in my head. I’d been over it with Piper. “I wasted years of my life with Mitchell, ignoring what was best for me. Ignoring my future other than Mitchell, and you see where that got me.”
“Okay.” Ryan straightened, his expression saying he surrendered. “I’m not trying to tell you what’s right for you. Only you can figure that out. If that’s focusing on school and waiting till afterward to get involved with someone, then that’s what you should do. Probably.”
I frowned at the probably.
“That’s what’s right for me,” I said with a touch of defiance, toward what, I wasn’t sure, because I wasn’t upset with Ryan. “Why do you say probably? Of course it’s what I should do.”
“It’s a good plan…unless you find the right person along the way but don’t pursue it. Because who knows if that right person will still be there by the time you finish school and finally have relationship inked into your plan?”
I tilted my head and sized up my brother because I could swear it sounded like he had personal experience with exactly that. But I didn’t know of any right person or even remotely possibly right person he’d had in his life.
“I’ll keep that in mind,” I said to appease him, because I finally had my plan, and I wasn’t going to veer from it because of really good sex or even because of possible feelings that I couldn’t define. “He’s coming back, so drop it please.”
“Happy to. But me dropping it doesn’t mean you should too.”
As Knox came back to the table, I pasted my nanny grin on my face, cooed to Juniper, and ignored her father.